《A Rose Dedicated to You》 Chapter 1 - Countess Rosenstein Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles I found the web novel again thanks to a kind reader! I noticed that the author had made changes to the chapters, and the reuploaded version has more chapters than the previous version, so I have decided to retranslate this project. Hopefully, I should be able to translate it faster this time if the author has kept some things the same and will aim to upload twice a week (or more)! Hope you enjoy it! The moment I saw him smile at his lover, it was so beautiful that I forgot to breathe and stared at him in awe. His smile was enticingly sweet, tender and full of affection. It was the first time I had ever seen him smile, and it was a side of him that I had never known. It was beautiful. Really beautiful. He was more beautiful than anything in this world, and I stopped as if I had been struck by lightning. At that moment, my eyes were for seeing him, and all my senses were for feeling him. Strong emotions exploded from the depths of my heart; it became a torrent that rose to my throat. It changed into heat and burnt my eyelids. ¨D¨D¨D Is this love? I learnt what it means to love someone; the essence of love that couldn¡¯t be described into words, and not just the abstract concept of love. I fell in love at the same time. His smile stole my heart and even my soul. On the other hand, I was also assaulted with intense regret. ¨D¨D¨D Why now? My feelings towards him were supposed to remain friendly, and never change. I preferred it that way since I wasn¡¯t supposed to love him. I am a woman who was taken in because of sympathy, so I shouldn¡¯t feel too much for him. As a decorative wife, I was supposed to accept their relationship and live with it. ¨D¨D¨D And yet, why, why am I feeling this way towards him now? Even the strongest joy was covered by the blackest sorrow, and it was as if my heart remained black and was torn to pieces. It was painful, heart-breaking and unbearable. ¨D¨D¨D Why did I¡­ Tears were streaming down my cheeks by the time I had noticed. The tears wouldn¡¯t stop, no matter how many times I wiped them away. I ran at dusk because I wanted to run away from everything. I kept on running even when my breathing got heavy, and my heart started to hurt. I wanted to get as far away from the two of them as possible, and if I could, I even wanted my soul to disappear from this world right now. ??????? Reference to Gaetano Donizetti¡¯s Lucia di Lammermoor. Spargi d¡¯amaro pianto. Under the dazzling lights of a huge chandelier, a songstress covered in blood was smiling on stage. She beautifully sang at the top of her voice about love that was proven with death. The mad melody depicted both joy and sadness. Shed bitter tears on my earthly remains¡­ And I will pray for you in heaven. Only when you join me will heaven seem beautiful. Heaven, to me! The songstress collapsed on the ground like a doll with broken strings when the chorus sang a sorrowful tune. The climax was when the fallen songstress is dragged to the back of the stage by a pastor and maid. In the end, a high-pitched sound like a death agony swelled from her throat. Aah! Is the reflection of her lover, who is not here, reflected in her wide-open eyes? Her voice was full of sorrow and wrung at the heart of the audience. When the performance ended, the audience erupted in applause, and everyone praised the songstress for doing a splendid job in singing the ¡®Mad Scene¡¯. In the meantime, the acting continued, and the songstress was held up by the servants while the stairs at the centre of the stage slowly went up as if it was going to heaven. As the story went on, and the male lead, who learnt that the female lead had died, committed suicide and the play ended in tragedy. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m jealous. I also clapped loudly along with the rest of the audience while sighing at the emotion that suddenly grasped my chest. A beautiful female lead who went mad because she fell in love and died after letting people know how powerful those feelings were. I also want to fall into madness like her and cry out my love for him without a care in the world while holding onto an illusion, and then die. Then, wouldn¡¯t this worthless life of mine become a little more decent? But unfortunately, I wasn¡¯t obsessed enough to go into a frenzy in front of others, nor am I sensitive enough to die from grief. Most importantly, my appearance is too plain for a tragic heroine. I¡¯m no match for the songstress. It is best to fantasize like this and be immersed in the feelings. I sighed again, deeper than I did before, got up from my seat and left the box. I walked fast so that I wouldn¡¯t bump into the ladies and gentlemen who were coming out from their private rooms or be called out to by someone I knew and walked down the grand stairs that lead to the hall on the ground floor. The theatre hall was spectacularly luxurious and was comparable to the halls of the noble residences where frequent evening parties are held. Although it wasn¡¯t as big as the theatre, it was white and gold overall and had a crystal chandelier hanging from the ceiling. The chandelier shone so brightly that you wouldn¡¯t think it was night. The dressed-up men and women were absorbed in their conversations, and the smell of perfume and the excitement in the hall made me stop in my tracks. I stopped halfway down the stairs, hid behind a big vase filled with lilies and sighed deeply. ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s okay. I convinced myself as I put an arrogant smile and held my fan. I strolled into the crowd of people. The young ladies, who had noticed me, had curiosity written on their cute faces as they whispered behind their fans. ¡°Look. It¡¯s Countess Rosenstein.¡± The whispers were full of malice. I slowed down and took my time to walk past the young ladies. ¡°Is that the person from the rumours?¡± ¡°Yeah. She¡¯s that Countess Rosenstein. She has an unapproachable expression on her face as if she is looking down on people as usual. Oh my, she didn¡¯t bring her lover with her and is alone.¡± ¡°Lover? Does she have a lover? She doesn¡¯t look much older than us.¡± ¡°If I¡¯m not mistaken, she¡¯s 18 this year. She just got married not even a year ago, and she already has a lover. She hasn¡¯t even given birth to any children.¡± I received a drink from a passing waiter and stopped to moisten my throat. As I was doing that, the whispering of the ladies got louder. ¡°Wow! Isn¡¯t that bad?¡± ¡°It¡¯s against the rules. Lord Rosenstein also seems quite angry. But she doesn¡¯t regret it at all and continues to date that lover of hers. I wonder if it¡¯s more accurate to say that she takes him around instead of dating him or pursuing him. The rumour is that the Countess is the one crushing on him and he continues to have an unwilling relationship with her for the sake of money.¡± ¡°Wow. Then why doesn¡¯t the Lord divorce her?¡± ¡°My thoughts exactly. Such a domineering and arrogant person should just be sent back to her parent¡¯s home. Apparently, her family home is in a really rural place, so she probably won¡¯t be poking her nose into our business and walking around like she owns the place. I¡¯m sure Lord Rosenstein cares about what people think. A year is too short, even if he does divorce her. He¡¯ll at least wait three or four years before divorcing her, don¡¯t you think?¡± That was enough for me to hear. I smiled provocatively at the young ladies, which caused them to raise their voices, ¡°Oh dear!¡± before I left. As I slipped through the crowd and returned the glass to a passing waiter, I heard criticism from other people too. ¡°I heard that the relationship between husband and wife is so cold that they don¡¯t even talk to each other. Apparently, Lord Rosenstein has made his decision and is showering his love onto his blind cousin who lives in the same mansion instead of his heartless wife who has a lover.¡± ¡°I wonder when they¡¯ll divorce. I want to introduce my niece to him if they do. My niece has always adored Earl Rosenstein. She¡¯s much more charming and attractive than that lady.¡± ¡°Ah, she looks like a terrible spendthrift. She buys a lot of jewellery and dresses and often visits gambling houses. She also gives a lot of money to her lover.¡± ¡°She comes from a poor rural noble house, right? She got married into a wealthy family and got spoiled, so she got carried away and does whatever she likes. Honestly, Lord Orpheus is so unfortunate.¡± I¡¯m pleased to hear their criticism. I chuckled in my mind since the criticisms were much worse than I¡¯d imagined. Of course, not everyone criticised me. There were also a lot of nobles who greeted me warmly. They crawl around me like ants as soon as they see me, and try to curry favour with their honeyed words. They ingratiate themselves into my favour like this and will probably try to receive favours through me on a rainy day. Even though the rumours are true and my relationship with him is getting colder. I skilfully dodge their greetings and compliments, and looked at them coldly while saying, ¡°Well everyone, have a good evening.¡± I was able to watch the opera that I¡¯ve always wanted to watch and learnt that the criticism I received from the world is strong. I don¡¯t have anything else to do here. I wanted to get back to the mansion quickly and rest, so I looked up arrogantly like a queen, and exited with a smile on my face. It was quiet outside, and I could smell the unique night dampness in the air. My nose almost wrinkled from all the perfume smells, so I took a deep breath and raised my face at the sky. There was a crescent moon floating in the sky; its shape resembled a smile and looked as if it were mocking me, the foolish and silly woman. ¨D¨D¨D Laugh if you want to laugh. I¡¯m not going to cry out in a frenzy, so laugh since this is the only way I prove my love to him in this way. Laugh at the foolish woman who is going to sacrifice everything for his happiness. ¨D¨D¨D Laugh all you want. Cuss all you want. I got on the carriage and wiped the smile which I had plastered on my face. I gazed out the window while feeling gloomier than usual; I don¡¯t know if it was because the tragedy of the play was still lingering within me or if it was because I was unusually shaken by the criticism I received because of my actions. Chapter 2 - The Relationship Between the Earl and His Wife Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles The relationship between the Earl and his wife has gone completely cold because of his wife, she hated her husband for some reason, even though everyone was envious that she had such a good husband, she got herself a lover in less than half a year of their marriage, spent a lot of money, and does whatever she wanted while ignoring her husband¡¯s warnings. She was such a bad wife that many people in the upper class frowned at the mere mention of her name, so it was natural that he sought comfort in his blind cousin, and many people felt sorry for him. They said, ¡°He should just divorce her.¡± Earl Rosenstein is a wealthy man. They also wanted a part of his fortune, so if possible, women wanted to become his second wife, or marry their daughter or relative to him. And those rumours were also true. In fact, the couple¡¯s relationship was so cold that they didn¡¯t even talk on a daily basis, and the wife did whatever she wanted without getting her husband involved. She goes out every day, spends a lot of money, goes to gambling dens, and treats the servants poorly. She still showed no signs of changing her behaviour despite her husband¡¯s repeated warnings and her reputation reaching rock bottom. It was only natural for people to laugh at her, saying that she was a dumb, brainless woman who was heading for her own destruction. However, there was one thing ¨D¨D¨D one thing that was different from what the people are saying. She doesn¡¯t hate her husband. Rather, it was the opposite. The Countess Rosenstein ¨D¨D¨D I love my husband. I love him more than anyone and anything. I love whim with all my heart, so much so that I would be willing to give everything I have to him and become unhappy in exchange for his happiness. I will not stop behaving foolishly even when people ridicule me to make my husband happy. ??????? Every time I look in a mirror, I wonder what it means to be beautiful. My mother was beautiful. That was why men flirted with her nearly every day. She looked really worn out just before she died, but for me, she was the most beautiful woman in the world. When I blink, the woman in the mirror blinks in the same way. When I tilt my head, she also tilts her head. Her black hair, which had just been tied up, swayed and her blue eyes stared back at me. I certainly inherited mother¡¯s features. But I wasn¡¯t beautiful. My mother was gorgeous, but I, who looked like her, wasn¡¯t beautiful at all. ¨D¨D¨D What¡¯s different? What does it mean to be beautiful? How does someone judge this? I was disgusted with staring at the gloomy woman in the mirror and turned away. There was a wasted gorgeous room behind me, and the interior was decorated with items that a rich, young woman would probably like, but looking at it made me feel restless. To be clear, it wasn¡¯t my cup of tea. I was the one who had chosen the furniture, wallpaper and curtains, so I couldn¡¯t complain to anyone. But I think I made it too flashy every time I look at it calmly like this. It is probably because of this design that I wake up every morning feeling like I¡¯m in a room I don¡¯t recognise. I inhaled the aroma of the sweet roses that filled the room while regretting that there was nothing I could do about it now. At first, the aroma made my head hurt, but my nose is probably paralysed to this smell now, so I don¡¯t feel uncomfortable anymore. Humans are adaptable. I adapt even on the days when I continue to wear my mask, even if people ridicule me or even if they look at me coldly. ¡°I don¡¯t like it. Do it again.¡± I sighed on purpose and glanced at the maid through the mirror. To be more precise, I glared at her. It was not a friendly gaze. The young maid, who was doing my hair, shuddered and stared frighteningly back at the gloomy woman in the mirror. ¡°Ma-madam¡­¡± Anxiety appeared on her adorable freckles on her face, and her red hair shook above her shoulders. The maid, ¨D¨D¨D Claire, was bewildered, and I knew what she wanted to say, but I deliberately asked coldly, ¡°What?¡± That alone caused Claire to shrink back, and she couldn¡¯t say anything else. But I knew that she wanted to say, ¡°This is the fifth time I¡¯m re-doing your hair. Can you tell me what the heck you don¡¯t like?¡± Truthfully, from what I could see, the way Claire did my hair is perfect, and I wanted to applaud her. Claire is skilful, and she could quickly do any hairdo, even if it were from an old trend or new trend. I¡¯m envious of how good she was with her hands since I¡¯m clumsy and can¡¯t even embroider. In other words, it wasn¡¯t her fault that I was ordering her to re-do the hairdos. She did my hair exactly as I asked it to be done, but I purposely asked her to do it again. For irrational reasons like ¡®I just don¡¯t like it¡¯. ¡°Didn¡¯t you hear me? I told you to do it again. Hurry up, nitwit.¡± ¡°Y-yes. I¡¯m sorry, Madam.¡± She bit her lips, looked down and untangled the hair-do that took her ages to put up. I was driven by the urge of wanting to hold her thin hands and apologise, but I held it down and stared at her with stern eyes. I stared at the mirror again, and this time, I gazed at the flaxen-haired maid who was standing in the corner of the room. She was older than Claire and had a calm aura. ¡°Renee let¡¯s stop this. Bring me the sapphire necklace I bought the other day. And replace the hair ornaments. The pearl hairpin will do.¡± ¡°Certainly.¡± Renee didn¡¯t disobey me. She bowed slowly and went to get the jewellery. She is a servant who had started working here three months ago. Her expression never changed, no matter what I did or how selfish I was. She responds indifferently and is a calm woman. She never gets agitated no matter what I do or say. She is very patient. ¨D¨D¨D Why? I gazed at Claire, who had magnificently handled my hair, and was touched. Claire aside, Renee really puts up with it and serves a woman like me. There shouldn¡¯t be many despicable masters like me in the capital. Generally, getting ready for about an hour in the mornings, ¨D¨D¨D or should I say just after noon, ¨D¨D¨D has made me lose my senses. I heard that separated ladies take an hour to get ready, so I copied them and ended up regretting it. Every morning, I¡¯m painfully aware of how long an hour is. If I don¡¯t change clothes numerous times, re-do my hair a lot and change my jewellery, then the time wouldn¡¯t pass. However, putting on makeup and dressing up didn¡¯t make me beautiful, so no one praised me. I was only wasting my precious time in the mornings. Because I¡¯m always like this, the maid, who had served me before Renee, quit and said she had to go and take care of her parents. Claire knew of my situation, so that was probably why she put up with me, but Renee worked here for three months without knowing anything, so I would like to ask her why she¡¯s still working for me. ¡°You can¡¯t even do my hair the way I want it done. Why are you this useless? The morning¡¯s tea wasn¡¯t good, and I don¡¯t like the way you wake me up. The maid who was working here before you was much better. I didn¡¯t like how she looked, but she was a fast worker.¡± I complained to Claire while Renee was looking for jewellery. I didn¡¯t have to say those things but saying it would make me seem more nasty. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Madam.¡± ¡°All you do is apologise. You¡¯re not progressing at all. Are you really reflecting on this? I can fire you and hire a new maid, you know?¡± I was astonished that I could say such awful things and clenched my fist in my mind. Claire looked a little surprised, and then she immediately looked sad and shocked. ¡°Please don¡¯t Madam.¡± ¡°Madam, I¡¯ve brought what you wanted.¡± As if Renee couldn¡¯t stand that Claire was turning pale and shuddering, she brought the jewellery to stop the conversation. Her action, which casually protected her colleague, deserved respect. This was a testament to her excellent abilities as a servant. ¡°You¡¯re slow,¡± I complained as I looked at the necklace that Renee had brought. The sapphire which sways in the centre was glistening mysteriously and was surrounded by diamonds. It was a piece of art that drew people in. I nearly sighed because of its beauty, but I swallowed it down. I said more selfish things and put Renee on the spot, ¡°What¡¯s this? Was this necklace this heavy? This silver chain is over the top and doesn¡¯t suit this dress at all. Bring me some other necklaces.¡± Renee nodded blankly. She took out necklaces from the jewellery box and brought it to me. However, I would say that I didn¡¯t like any of them and sighed pretentiously. Then, I rested my chin on the dresser as if I was dejected. After thinking a little, I said as if I¡¯d just come up with an idea, ¡°I¡¯m going out to buy jewellery to match this dress. I¡¯ll go out after lunch, so get the carriage ready.¡± Renee and Claire looked at each other. Their faces said, ¡°What is she thinking?¡± ¡°Madam, you just bought this necklace the other day¡­¡± ¡°So what?¡± I had expected this reaction, and I scowled at them unpleasantly. Claire turned away awkwardly, and Renee closed her gaping mouth. The sapphire necklace that Renee had brought me was costly, and the price was enough to buy decent land on the outskirts of the capital. Furthermore, I had only bought it five days ago. They probably couldn¡¯t believe that I was going to buy another piece of jewellery after having just made an expensive purchase. But I was still on the soft side. The ladies, who are crazy about jewellery, try to purchase expensive jewellery by taking out massive loans. This House was rolling in money, so this amount of wastefulness wouldn¡¯t make a dent in the finances. Also, despite how I act, I accurately calculate how much I could spend while shopping. It would be distressing if my wasteful spending greatly affected the finances of this House. ¡°I want to buy something because there¡¯s nothing I like! I don¡¯t like any of these necklaces! I don¡¯t like them! I want a new one! Anyway, it doesn¡¯t matter what you two say. I¡¯ll go out after I have lunch and rest for a bit!¡± ¡°¡­ Understood.¡± When I throw tantrums, the two would quickly lower their heads and sigh quietly. Chapter 3 - Extravagance Translator: blushy Editor: delishnoodles Nabel, the capital of the Kingdom of Valkenburg. Otto Street, named after the founding King, is lined with historic red brick buildings and trees and was filled with high-end shops used by the upper echelons of society. The stone pavement was packed with two-horse drawn carriages and dressed up ladies and gentlemen. This street had a quieter atmosphere compared to the other streets. There were a large number of tailors and jewellery shops on this street. A carriage ran through this street, which was also known as the birthplace of Valkenburg fashion and stopped in front of one of the shops. The name on the floating signboard engraved with gold letters was Charmes Mondt. It was a famous tailor shop that had produced several well-known designers, including Lady Frau Bernhard, the most talked-about woman in high society today. Charmes Mondt didn¡¯t just sell dresses; they also sold shoes, accessories, costly jewellery and perfumes to match with clothes. Only this store provided an array of products. Incidentally, the sapphire necklace I¡¯d bought the other day was also from here. When I got off the carriage, I received glances from all the ladies and gentlemen on the street. They probably saw the Rosenstein crest on the carriage and were curious about who would come out. They secretly started gossiping as soon as they saw me, but I pretended not to notice this and walked into the shop with my two maids. Inside, there were a lot of women in colourful dresses, and the sickly perfume aroma that was often associated with places like this filled the room. The customers were talking noisily, but they froze when they saw me, and a hushed silence reigned in the shop. This also happened often, so I warded off the glances until a calm and well-dressed, classy older gentleman appeared from the back of the shop. ¡°Well, well, Lady Rosenstein!¡± ¡°How do you do, Bauer?¡± The man who was smiling broadly as soon as he saw me is Klaus Bauer, the owner of Charmes Mondt. The owner, who I was acquainted with, gave me a brief greeting before showing me to the back of the shop where he¡¯d just came out of moments ago. ¡°Please come to the back. We¡¯ll talk about what you need in the reception office.¡± Charmes Mondt had several private reception offices for their top customers. The one that Bauer showed me to was one of those offices. The floor was made from amber oak wood and looked perfect with the white-based furniture. There was a large vase by the wall, and it was filled with crimson roses and white baby breaths; it was so vivid that it was dazzling. I sat down on the white leather chair, and a blonde beauty appeared with tea. The beauty was wearing a stylish dress and made me think that she was a lady from some noble house. The shop clerks in this shop are also elegant. The beauty bowed and stood in the corner of the room. We talked a little, and then Bauer brought up the topic, ¡°What item are you looking for today?¡± ¡°I want a necklace. Something in sapphire or blue diamond would be nice.¡± Bauer widened his eyes a little, but soon returned to his friendly smile and said softly, ¡°I¡¯m sure you purchased a sapphire necklace the other day.¡± ¡°I want one that I can wear during the day and goes with a light-coloured dress. The other one is a bit heavy. But the blue jewel is nice,¡± I said as childishly as possible. I made myself look as if I wasn¡¯t smart, and just wanted to obtain what I wanted without giving it much thought. ¡°Alright. I will have some prepared right now, so please wait a moment.¡± Bauer looked at the beauty, and she left the room. I took a sip of my tea as I sunk deeper into the comfortable chair and leaned back. Then, I looked at the roses and baby breaths in the corner of the room. I actually don¡¯t want dresses or jewellery. I wasn¡¯t beautiful, and they couldn¡¯t make me beautiful, so they were just meaningless things to me. No one would look at me even if I dressed up, and no one would be pleased to see me dress up. That wasn¡¯t why I wasn¡¯t being extravagant for myself. I buy dresses and jewellery to devalue myself when I wear them. ¨D¨D¨D How stupid. I sometimes think this even though I¡¯m doing something that I need to do. Why am I doing something so stupid and meaningless? But I¡¯m planning to sell them for cash one day. ¨D¨D¨D I actually don¡¯t want to do this. Shopping wasn¡¯t fun at all. I wonder what kind of face Renee would make if I told her this. Would she be surprised if I repeated something confusingly selfish? I thought depressingly and the owner and clerk came back with several jewellery boxes. From Bauer¡¯s proud look, I could tell that he was trying to sell me something costly again, ¨D¨D¨D or he was trying to sell me the best selection of jewellery. ¡°I have brought what you wanted. I want you to look at this first,¡± he said as he took out a magnificent and extravagant necklace with a large drop of sapphire and blue diamond inlays around the edge. It glistened brightly because of the light coming in from the window, and it was more magnificent than mysterious. It was so beautiful that I was hesitant to touch it. ¡°This is a star sapphire necklace.¡± ¡°It¡¯s beautiful.¡± I honestly thought so, but this wasn¡¯t something I could wear during the day; this necklace was probably made for evening parties. I wanted a necklace that I could also wear during the day, but the owner was working hard to sell it, so I listened quietly. ¡°This is the pride of our shop. I have run this shop for a long time, but I have never seen such a splendid necklace. This is the highest quality star sapphire. Lady Rosenstein¡¯s stunning blue eyes suit any type of jewellery.¡± ¡°Thanks. So, how much is it?¡± I lightly brushed off his compliments and asked for the price. And, the price which he stated made me freeze, ¡°Four million marcas.¡± I almost fainted, but I heard the two behind me gasp, so I managed to bear with it. The necklace that I bought the other day was five million marcas. Even though the price was lower than that necklace, it was still a ridiculous price. When the bill arrives, both my husband and the butler will probably lecture me. But I had no choice but to buy it. Or more like, the two behind me will be suspicious if I don¡¯t buy it. I always buy the items that the owner recommends. Countess Rosenstein, who was selfish, arrogant, moody, and did whatever she wanted, must buy whatever she wanted without thinking about it. ¡°Then I¡¯ll buy it.¡± ¨D¨D¨D My voice was trembling not because of fear, but because I was happy. If Renee asks me why I was trembling, that would be how I would answer. ¡°Thank you very much. I knew you would buy it, Lady Rosenstein. You have good eyes.¡± ¡°It¡¯s because you recommend good things. I¡¯m always grateful, Bauer.¡± Bauer grinned widely and instructed the clerk to wrap up the necklace. Meanwhile, cold sweat was dripping down my back. I held my hands together so that they wouldn¡¯t notice the trembling of my fingertips. ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s okay. I should still be able to sell it for a reasonable price even if a few days have passed if it¡¯s just this. If it¡¯s not enough, then I can compensate him with the money I make from investments. It¡¯ll work out somehow. ¡°I¡¯ve also prepared other sapphire and blue diamond necklaces for you, so please have a look at them,¡± Bauer said as if he was delivering the final blow. I would typically nod because that was what I wanted, but I don¡¯t want to see any more jewellery today. I would feel sick if I look at any more jewellery, and I would probably go crazy because of anxiety. However, I wouldn¡¯t be a spendthrift if I don¡¯t buy anything else. Then, I said this to Bauer, ¡°I¡¯ve already had enough of necklaces. I want more hair ornaments. And a hat. I¡¯d like a straw hat. One with a cool colour. Do you have any new designs?¡± This is still cheaper than jewellery, and I would still seem moody if I change my mind on what I want. I feel bad for Bauer who brought me all this jewellery, but he was used to my whims, so it was fine. ¡°Yes, Lady Rosenstein. I¡¯ll go prepare those right away.¡± Bauer smiled as I expected he would, and he arranged so many items on the table that it looked like it would overflow. In the end, I bought a terribly expensive necklace, three relatively cheap hair ornaments and two hats for summer before leaving the shop. The owner looked pleased with himself and Renee, and Claire looked as if they had mixed feelings. I couldn¡¯t tell whether they were tired or stunned. Chapter 4 - Claude Ritter Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles Three days later, I quarrelled with my husband and rushed out of the mansion. Even though I said we¡¯d quarrelled, he was lecturing me about my bad behaviour and about how I wasted money at Charmes Mondt. The lecture would have ended if I¡¯d just obediently apologised to him, but I acted in a sulky manner instead. I snapped at my husband, who was trying to talk calmly until the end. In the end, I shouted a terrible remark, ¡°I¡¯m going to find my lover to comfort me!¡± as I violently slammed his study door shut. I actually had an appointment with said lover in the afternoon, so I used that as an excuse. When I left the study and returned to my room, I ordered Renee to prepare the carriage and had Claire help me get ready. When Renee left, I didn¡¯t express my usual displeasure, nor did I start chatting friendly with Claire since Renee would become suspicious upon her return if the mood in the room was different than usual. I didn¡¯t talk much and only exchanged the occasional glance with Claire. She did my hair and make-up, then I wore a light crimson dress and a flowery hat that had a ribbon which was embroidered with white flowers. My sombre appearance looked somewhat better because of my bright and gorgeous dress. Claire quietly praised me, ¡°You look nice, Madam,¡± so I thanked her. I maintained my straight face and declared, ¡°I¡¯m going to put on a good show,¡± before leaving the room. Claire was staying behind, and only Renee would be accompanying me. My destination was the studio apartment where my lover, Claude Ritter, lives. Actually, my husband had just pressed me to end my relationship with my lover just moments ago, so I thought that the butler would stop me, but surprisingly, I was able to leave easily. The carriage shook, and I cheered up as I stared at the roadside trees. The silence inside of the carriage, which contained only Renee and me, didn¡¯t bother me at all. That was how much I was looking forward to seeing Claude. It didn¡¯t take long to get from the mansion on the outskirts of Nabel to the apartment complex where Claude lived; it only took 30 minutes. He used to live further away but moved closer because I had complained about the distance. Of course, I paid for his moving fees. Well, I can¡¯t say that proudly since the money belonged to the Rosensteins¨D¨D¨D. Claude¡¯s building was a stylish brick building along the street, and his studio was on the ground floor. The door opened a while after Renee rang the doorbell, and the resident of the studio appeared. Claude Ritter is a good-looking man with soft, cat-like blonde hair, which at a glimpse looked as if he had just gotten out of bed, and green eyes. He is the man who is rumoured to be my lover. He had just been drawing a while ago. He had on a white shirt with black trousers. Brushes in various colours were stuffed into his apron. ¡°How do you do, Claude?¡± ¡°Well if it isn¡¯t Lady Rosenstein.¡± Claude looked disgusted as soon as he saw me. His slightly twitching mouth was also a reaction that I always get from him. The rumours were that he was accompanying his patron, Countess Rosenstein, against his will, and that he was compelled to accompany a selfish woman who was younger than him because she had given him financial support before. That was why he had reacted in a disgusted manner. Because of those rumours, people in high society ridiculed Countess Rosenstein saying both her lover and husband hate her. ¡°Aah! I wanted to see you, Claude!¡± I pushed Renee out of the way and hugged Claude, and he shivered and froze as if he was shocked. It was probably unpleasant to be touched by me. A firm voice sounded from above my head, ¡°Countess Rosenstein¡­¡± Claude separated himself from me. I put my hands on his shoulders, which were slender for a man, and looked up at him. Claude¡¯s poker-face didn¡¯t crumble, and he looked down at me with eyes that hid his discomfort. I knew that this behaviour wasn¡¯t accepted by others, but I didn¡¯t care and acted coquettishly. ¡°Come on, Claude. Don¡¯t I always tell you to call me Ophelia?¡± Claude turned his head away to avoid my gaze. ¡°¡­ I¡¯m sorry, Ophelia.¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine if you get it.¡± I clung to Claude¡¯s arm, and went inside his house without asking for permission as if it was my own house. His room didn¡¯t have many things in it, and sunlight poured in through the big window, and the peculiar smell of oil paint drifted in the air. This studio was also his living room, and on one side was his kitchen and the other his bedroom. It wasn¡¯t too big nor too small, and it was perfect for living alone. I rudely looked around his room and peeked at the still-life painting that was placed in the middle of the room before turning back to look at Claude, who stood idly at the entrance. ¡°How is living here? Do you need anything?¡± I always say these words whenever I visit this apartment. Claude sluggishly shook his head and said monotonously, ¡°I¡¯m living comfortably thanks to you.¡± ¡°Really? Then that¡¯s fine. Tell me right away if you¡¯re having trouble or need anything. I¡¯ll deal with it.¡± Claude silently lowered his head. His indifferent attitude and the way how his expression doesn¡¯t change really resembles that person. I looked around the room again and noticed Renee standing in the corner like a shadow. I have already shown her how affectionate I am towards my lover, so isn¡¯t it about time for her to leave this cramped room? Most of all, I can¡¯t have an intimate conversation with Claude while she¡¯s still in the room. ¡°Say, Claude. I don¡¯t want to leave you today. Something terrible happened, so can I stay over?¡± I walked over to Claude and crossed his arms with mine. Claude frowned, and his face showed his inner feelings which said, ¡°You would trouble me if you stay over.¡± But it didn¡¯t matter how he was feeling inside, I am his important patron. He couldn¡¯t bluntly refuse and nodded reluctantly instead. ¡°That¡¯s how it is, so you can leave. Come pick me up tomorrow around noon.¡± I smugly turned to look at Renee and said as if I had won for no particular reason. Renee bowed and said, ¡°Understood,¡± before leaving the room. The door quietly closed, and it was just the two of us. Claude, who had hardly spoken and looked sour up to this point, burst out in laughter as if he couldn¡¯t hold it back anymore. ¡°Aahaahaahaa!¡± He held onto his stomach while laughing. It was a cheerful laughter that made it seem like his displeasure had been a lie. ¡°Phelia, you¡¯ve gotten better at acting. Especially your attitude towards the servant! It was amazing. Uh-huh, you were quite arrogant.¡± ¡°Thank you for your compliment.¡± People whisper rumours about how Countess Rosenstein fell into an unrequited love with an up-and-coming painter, and that she forced him to be her lover by offering him money. However, the facts are different. I am providing financial support to him so that he could continue as a painter, but I have never forced him to be in a sexual relationship, nor have I ever wanted to. He is like a friend to me, plus his love affairs are limited to those of the same sex. So, no matter what people suspect of us, we can never have that kind of relationship. Most importantly, I already have someone I love. The love I have for that person is so endlessly deep that even being self-sacrificing isn¡¯t painful, and I am confident that even if a ravishing young man tries to flirt with me, I would never be swayed. Claude is a good man, but he is only a friend; nothing more, nothing less. ¡°I took your advice. I¡¯m loathed in the Rosenstein House now thanks to that, even the servants don¡¯t want to look me in the eyes. Of course, the general public also views me in the same way.¡± I didn¡¯t say this in my domineering high-pitched tone, but in my natural low voice. The forced smile that was usually plastered on my face was also gone, and my expression was blanker than the one Claude had on before. Actually, this is my real face, and I am bad at expressing my emotions on my face, let alone smile. When I lived at my parent¡¯s house, I was as blank as a mask and people feared me because they said that I don¡¯t have any human emotions. I could fake my smile because I trained until I bled. People curse Countess Rosenstein and she never loses sleep over anything they say. She is the result of my acting, which I perfected from careful research and observations. ¡°I¡¯m sure you went all-out because it¡¯s you. It¡¯s enough to ruin a beauty.¡± Claude Ritter isn¡¯t a noble; he¡¯s only a painter. Despite this, he doesn¡¯t use honorifics when talking to me, his investor, because I asked him not to. The reasons were that he is older than me, and I respect him, and I didn¡¯t want my friends to be mindful when they are around me. At first, he had declined in horror, but after asking him many times, he gradually changed how he spoke to me and speaks to me in a friendly tone now. ¡°If I have to do it, then I¡¯m going to do it properly. Also, I always say this, but unfortunately, I¡¯m not a beauty.¡± ¡°You do always say that, but you are beautiful.¡± I understand how mediocre my appearance is, so I don¡¯t go over the moon over simple flattery. ¡°If you want something, then I¡¯ll get it for you even without such flatteries.¡± ¡°No, I don¡¯t want anything. I¡¯m not flattering you. I¡¯m being honest. You¡¯re gorgeous.¡± ¨D¨D¨DIs that really so? Claude noticed my confused gaze and suddenly smiled gently. His green eyes were filled with undeniable affection, and it felt as if my tattered heart was being gently caressed. ¡°You¡¯re the only one who says that.¡± I, who was happy that he had been honest, said in a charmless tone to hide my embarrassment. ¡°Really? Well, whatever. You won¡¯t believe me no matter what I say. Anyway, take off that gaudy hat and sit down. I¡¯ll make some tea.¡± ¡°Uh, Claude¡­¡± I said hesitantly when Claude was about to go to the kitchen. ¡°What is it?¡± ¡°Can I really stay here tonight? I can leave if you don¡¯t want me here.¡± He had already said that I can stay, but I¡¯m worried about being a nuisance. If I am, then I don¡¯t mind staying at a nearby hotel for the night. Renee has probably already reported to my husband that I would be staying the night with my lover, so my goal has already been accomplished. However, Claude widened his eyes in surprise and said, ¡°What¡¯re you saying, Phelia?¡± ¡°Of course, you can stay over. You¡¯re my friend, so you don¡¯t have to be shy. I¡¯m sure there are lots of things you want to talk about, and I also want to hear about them. You have your nightgown and a change of clothes. I¡¯ll also help you change, so it¡¯s fine, right?¡± ¡°I can change by myself but are you free? Are you sure I can stay over tonight?¡± ¡°Of course. You have things you want to talk about, right? Why don¡¯t we talk all night?¡± ¨D¨D¨D Friend. I was pleased that he had called me that and my heart got a little warmer. Yes, we are friends. Claude is one of my few friends and a collaborator. The only person who knows about my feelings. ¡°Thanks, Claude.¡± ¡°You¡¯re welcome.¡± Claude cheerfully waved his hand, and my tension became lighter. ¨D¨D¨D This person is really a lifesaver. I thought, once again. Chapter 5 - How I Met Claude Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles Claude and I met half a year ago at the public painting exhibition organised by the seventh Prince of the Kingdom of Valkenburg. At that time, Claude was a fledgeling painter, and he exhibited his unique avant-garde work, which is quite different from the mainstream realism paintings, at the exhibition. A goddess bathing in a fountain in the middle of a forest. His work, which became highly acclaimed later, was quite unpopular on the first day of the exhibition. Everyone criticised it, ¡°It¡¯s a primitive and crude painting,¡± and ¡°It looks as if this was painted by an amateur who knew nothing about painting.¡± However, I didn¡¯t think that. I couldn¡¯t move from my spot the moment I saw his painting. The trees and plants that were painted delicately over time looked as if they were rough. Even as an abstract, the goddess who exposed her body was beautiful and charming. The adorable animals flocking around the goddess. I thought that it was a beautiful painting. I was utterly fascinated by it in an instant. When I came back to my senses, I pushed through the crowd to look for the person who had created that painting. It was the first day of the exhibition, and I was sure that the painter would come to observe the painting they¡¯d exhibited. I walked around the hall with Claire and asked people if they had seen the person who had painted that painting. Then, Claude came to find me, probably because he had heard that I was looking for him. Claude Ritter was a young man in his early twenties. His wrinkled shirt and frayed trousers seemed really out of place in a room filled with dressed-up ladies and gentlemen, and it was easy to imagine that he wasn¡¯t rich. He couldn¡¯t hide his vigilance towards me, and he looked suspicious. He had probably thought, ¡®What does this young noble woman want with a fledgeling artist like me?¡¯ I was excited and paid no heed to his attitude. After a brief introduction, I went straight into what I thought of his painting. ¡ºI fell in love with your painting. If you don¡¯t mind, I would like to help you to continue to bring these beautiful works out into the world. ¡» Claude looked flabbergasted; probably because he never imagined that this would happen, or he might have just thought I was crazy. It was normal for people to get confused if a young girl said such a thing on a first meeting. He must be thinking, ¡®What is she thinking? What does she want?¡¯ At that time, I had no intention of making him my ¡ºlover¡». I was just genuinely fascinated by his painting and wanted to help him create more. Back then, I still hadn¡¯t wasted money. I saved the generous allowance that my husband had given me and had barely spent any of it. At any rate, I hadn¡¯t wasted money and had wanted to use it for something meaningful, which was what supporting this artist was. To be more convincing, I desperately told him how great that painting was and how shocked I was by it. I told him that I wanted to see his other works and that I would buy them if I liked them. He was a handsome man, but he wasn¡¯t interested in his appearance and didn¡¯t have any ulterior motives. I would have probably made him the same offer even if he had a face that people didn¡¯t want to see twice. At that moment, all I was evaluating was his talent as a painter. Claude listened seriously as I blabbered on and on and thanked me many times. And whether it was because it was troublesome to refuse a persistent person, or if it was because he was moved by my passion, ¨D¨D¨D I don¡¯t know which; but although he had declined my offer at first, he agreed in the end and let me be his patron. At first, I had only passed his money to the servants, but then I started to go to all his exhibitions, and I started to talk to him more. Our relationship had been neutral at first, but then he invited me to his studio to see a painting he was working on. From then on, I started to visit him more regularly, and we got to know each other better. Claude was a mysterious person, and he didn¡¯t see me as a woman even though he was the target of my rumoured love affair. Perhaps because of that, I didn¡¯t get nervous whenever I was in the same room as him, and I always feel at ease when we are together. It was like we had been friends for a very long time. It wasn¡¯t awkward even if there was a momentary pause in our conversation or if there was a long silence. At one point, I revealed my mixed feelings towards my husband. Claude didn¡¯t laugh at my foolish thoughts. He listened to me seriously, and he was worried about me. ¡°You won¡¯t be happy like this,¡± and ¡°Is there no other way?¡± He would say. And finally, he even said that he would help me. ¡ºIt¡¯s thanks to you that I can draw, so I want to help you.¡» I was happy with just those words. And most of all, Claude is an important friend to me. I couldn¡¯t use my precious friend for a purpose that I thought was moronic. I refused many times when he said that, but he didn¡¯t budge. He even took on the role of my lover so that people would undermine my reputation. Even though his reputation also dropped at the same time. ¡°Enough of that. From what I can tell, it seems to be going well. You waste money, gamble, treat the servants badly and even got a lover. To make matters worse, you defy your husband. You¡¯re nearly the perfect immoral woman. Lord Rosenstein is really patient with you,¡± Claude said, his voice tingling with laughter, as he stirred the tea with a silver spoon after I had explained that I had been lectured by my husband for wasting money. I had been gazing at the canvas in the corner of the room, but I looked back at Claude, who was sitting across from me and nodded. ¡°Yes, I think so too. He is a very patient man.¡± ¡°If he does divorce you¡­¡± Claude suddenly said while looking serious, ¡°¡­ then come here. I¡¯ve said this many times, but I can support you and even pay you wages.¡± ¡°As an assistant?¡± ¡°Not an assistant, you¡¯ll be the help.¡± I married into the Rosenstein family as a political tool and would not be permitted to return home if I don¡¯t accomplish my role. But then again, I never want to go back to that house. I am prepared to enter a monastery or fall into prostitution after he divorces me, but Claude said that he would take me in when he found out about this. Unlike when we first met, Claude has become a well-known painter and now earns a decent living even without my investment. It was simple for him to at least hire one servant. ¡°Then I¡¯ll have to diligently work on my sewing and cooking.¡± ¡°What about cleaning and laundry?¡± ¡°I¡¯m confident with that, especially when it comes to sweeping fallen leaves. ¨D¨D¨D You don¡¯t have a garden, so I won¡¯t get the chance to show you my skills. And I can do the prep work for food like plucking chickens and draining their blood.¡± ¡°I think that¡¯s good enough.¡± ¡°No, it¡¯s not. I have to do my job well because you¡¯ll be hiring me.¡± Claude stared at me and then suddenly laughed. ¡°Did I say something strange?¡± ¡°Nope, you didn¡¯t.¡± He put his hand over his mouth and tried desperately to hold back his laughter. This happens sometimes. He would suddenly laugh after I say what¡¯s on my mind. My na?ve remarks might be amusing. I tilted my head while wondering what I had done this time, and Claude whispered, ¡°Oh, I really ¨D¨D¨D¡­¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°Have a lot of fun when I¡¯m with you.¡± When I heard that I felt strange; happy, but extremely hurt. There weren¡¯t many people who acknowledged my existence like this. This was also true before I put on my act as a selfish, domineering, and arrogant woman. I am always hated. Even my father neglected me. My half-sister also hates me. After marrying into the Rosenstein House, the servants looked at me coldly and even my husband ¨D¨D¨D. ¡°Thanks, Claude,¡± I said as if to block the emotions that were swelling up inside me. ¡°You have really saved me. Thanks.¡± I was vexed because I could only express my thoughts and emotions with these common words. Still, Claude said to me with a soft and dazzling smile, ¡°You¡¯re welcome.¡± Chapter 6 - Dream Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles I stood alone in the Rosenstein mansion garden. I can¡¯t really recall why I was standing in the garden when the sun is about to set. I feel like I wanted to give something. To that woman who he loves and who is also a dear friend of mine. ¨D¨D¨D Yes. The small box in my hand. I wanted to give her the box wrapped in beautiful wrapping paper and tied with a ribbon. I chose this gift carefully because I wanted to see her happy face and see her enjoy it even if she couldn¡¯t see the gift. I visited her room, but she wasn¡¯t there, then I met her maid, Elisa, while I was walking, and she told me that she was in the garden. She had probably taken a walk for a change of pace, so I thought it would be bad if I disturbed her. I could pass it to her tomorrow, but Elisa had said something unpleasant, and I wanted to do something about my discomfort, so I went to meet her in the end. The eerie feeling that I was sinking in a swamp should feel better if I meet her, talk about trivial things and see her smile broadly. It was cold outside. The air was clear, the sky was covered in thin clouds like a haze and dyed in red. The sun was red like blood and was about to set beyond the smoky mountains. ¨D¨D¨DPerhaps she could feel the golden light drifting about even if she can¡¯t see. I imagined this as I walked through the garden that was changing from winter to spring. The plants were sprouting, the flowers were growing buds, and the withered grass was returning to green. In another half a month, it will get warmer, and the pretty flowers will start blooming everywhere. My room is filled with jasmine which Claire had picked, and roses that that person had given me. Red, white, yellow, light pink, and orange. The roses come in many different colours. And I welcome the happiest spring of my life. The first and last happiest days of my life¨D¨D¨D. I walked around the rose garden, but I couldn¡¯t find her, so I walked between the rose hedges which were like a maze. Then, I heard cute laughter out of nowhere. There was someone behind the hedge. I heard the low voice of a man speaking along with a bright and beautiful voice. I thought it might have been her, but I wasn¡¯t sure. I looked between the gaps in the hedge to check. I was going to sneak off without saying anything if it was a servant¡¯s tryst. She was there. The light laughter belonged to her and next to her was that person. They sat side by side in a white chair in the open space beyond the hedge and were chatting happily. ¨D¨D¨D I finally found her. I felt relieved when I saw them. I carefully adjusted the item in my hand and walked towards them. I don¡¯t plan on disturbing them. I will give this to her, have a little conversation and then leave right away. I saw it then. From the gap that was slightly opened between the rose trees, with the light of the setting sun shining on him, I saw him smile gently and lovingly. I had never seen this smile on him before. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, why? It is more beautiful than anything else in the world and shines brighter than the golden scenery of a sunset. ¡°¡­ am, Madam.¡± My body was shaking, and I woke up. I saw Renee¡¯s poker-face as she sat across from me when I opened my eyes. ¡°Madam, we¡¯ll be at the mansion soon.¡± I nodded sluggishly and rubbed my heavy eyelids that felt like lead. I had dozed off on the way back to the mansion from Claude¡¯s apartment. The dull shaking of the carriage invited sleepiness at the best times, but I stayed up late chatting with Claude last night, so it spurred me to sleep. I saw a familiar view when I looked out the window. The road was lined with lush green maple trees, and it made it seem like the city area where the buildings were cramped together was a dream. On the other side of the trees was a deep green forest. Some roads off to the side lead to villas owned by nobles, and stylish roofs and chimneys were peeking out from between the gaps of the trees. Running along this tree-lined road was a forest, and we should arrive at the white mansion owned by the Rosenstein House. ¡°I¡¯ll take another nap when we get back to the mansion.¡± Countess Rosenstein is a lazy woman. It is appropriate for her to take a nap until evening after returning from her lover¡¯s house. *Fuwaah* I let out a big yawn and crossed my legs as if it were tiresome. We passed the forest while I was spacing out, and I can see the white mansion. It was a beautiful mansion which was built on a clear plot of land, and it shone under the blue sky. The white cobblestone pavement extended straight into the vast garden, the fresh grass, tall plants that never wither even in winter, and fountains filled with rich water. Various flowers are planted in the flower beds according to the season. Colourful roses bloom in summer and autumn, and their sweet smell drifts in the air. If heaven does exist, then it would surely be a place like the rose garden of the Rosenstein estate. The scenery of heaven that I imagined overlapped with the landscape of the Rosenstein mansion garden. Before long, the carriage entered the estate and stopped in front of the front door. I got off the carriage with the help of the coachman and entered the magnificent mansion. I passed through the front door and entered an old-fashioned room that felt just as old as it looked. It was usually quiet here, but today was different. A burst of bright and beautiful laughter sounded through the room. It stopped as soon as I had entered the hall and only a light reverberation remained. ¡°Madam,¡± I had already seen them even without Renee telling me anything. The man and woman who had their arms crossed in a friendly manner as they stood in the middle of the mildly arched stairs. ¡°What¡¯s wrong? Orphe,¡± the woman asked curiously. The man looked straight down at me, but the woman didn¡¯t notice me. Her eyes were looking restlessly around the room and weren¡¯t on me who was standing at the entrance. ¡°Orphe?¡± The man kept his eyes on me as he whispered something into the woman¡¯s ears. Then, the woman opened her eyes in surprise, and her movements stopped as if she was frozen. I looked up coldly at her and glared at the man in the deafening silence. Then, I said, ¡°Good morning, Orpheus and Diana. You both still get along well. Are you going for a walk now?¡± Orpheus and Diana. The two people standing up there are my husband and his cousin. The two were openly linking hands in front of me; they didn¡¯t simply just get along. They are both genuine lovers, and Diana couldn¡¯t see, so they would link arms like this. She was freeloading at this house because she was blind, and the previous Lord of the Rosenstein House had taken her in because she lost her parents and her eyesight in an epidemic. ¡°It¡¯s a beautiful day today. It¡¯s perfect for a walk. Please take your time and have fun,¡± my pointless high-pitched voice resounded. Orpheus didn¡¯t move a single eyebrow, but Diana hung her head down awkwardly. I raised my lips as if I was sneering at them and squinted. ¡°Ophelia, umm¡­¡± Diana said. I walked up the stairs, stopped and raised my face. The two were close to me, and I could reach them if I went up another two or three steps. Diana¡¯s face stiffened more awkwardly, probably because she could feel me close by. ¡°What is it?¡± ¡°If you want¡­¡± Diana spoke with restraint. ¡°Would you have lunch with us outside? We were just about to go have lunch. The sun is warm, and the roses have bloomed so beautifully¡­¡± ¡°Oh, how nice,¡± I interrupted her and smiled as if I was ridiculing her. It might have no meaning against Diana since she couldn¡¯t see, but it was effective on Orpheus. His expression, which hadn¡¯t even twitched until now, changed, and he frowned. I saw this, and my smile deepened. ¡°But I¡¯ll refuse. I¡¯ll just be bothering you two.¡± ¡°No, you¡­¡± ¡°Should I say that it¡¯s uncomfortable, so I don¡¯t want to? It¡¯s not fun being with you two. It just feels uncomfortable to see you two showing off. And you know, even if you¡¯re alright with it, it doesn¡¯t look like your partner thinks the same? If you look at his face¡­ Oh my, sorry. You can¡¯t see, can you? Well then, that¡¯s too bad. You can¡¯t guess what your beloved cousin is thinking.¡± ¡°Ophelia,¡± Orpheus, who had remained silent for a long time, finally spoke. He only said one word, which was my name¨D¨D¨D. But that one word contained many emotions. What does he want from me? What is that woman to him? It made me realise unpleasant things. ¡°What is it?¡± ¡°There are things you can and can¡¯t say.¡± ¡°I know. So what?¡± Instead of answering, Orpheus sent me a cold and icy glance. I also glared at him as not to lose and curled my lips. ¡°Ah, I see. So that¡¯s what you¡¯re angry about. But, Orpheus, I only told the truth. It¡¯s true that she can¡¯t see and that she can remain calm because she can¡¯t see the scary face you¡¯re making next to her. Well, the truth is so cruel sometimes that people want to give up their lives.¡± ¡°Ophelia, stop that¡­¡± ¡°I-it¡¯s fine, Orphe!¡± Diana clung to Orpheus¡¯s arm and shook as if she was brushing away the tense mood. ¡°Ophelia is right, it¡¯s all true. I don¡¯t care,¡± she said as she turned her face to where I was. ¡°Ophelia, I¡¯ve said this many times before, but we¡¯re not in a suspicious relationship. Sure, Orpheus cares for me one way or another, and he does accompany me when I go out. But that¡¯s because he feels sorry for me, and not because he has any special feelings for me¡­¡± ¡°It doesn¡¯t matter,¡± I spat out and glared at the woman who was gasping. ¡°I don¡¯t care about your excuses. I also don¡¯t want to hear any more of your nonsense. I¡¯m not interested. It¡¯s stupid.¡± ¡°But, why¡­? Ophelia, how do we get you to believe us?¡± ¡°Hey, Diana. Do you know what rumours the world spreads about you two? Lord Rosenstein is more affectionate with his blind cousin, who lives in the same mansion, than with his heartless wife who has a lover¡­ That¡¯s what they say. Don¡¯t you think that this is a more serious problem than whether I believe you or not?¡± ¡°No! Ophelia, it¡¯s not like that. Orpheus doesn¡¯t love me, but you¡­¡± ¡°Me? Love? Or does he hate me so much that he doesn¡¯t even want to see me? Which one is it? Fufufu¡­ Diana, that person, he only thinks of me as a hairy caterpillar who bites on rose leaves. It¡¯s evident in the way he¡¯s been glaring at me for a while now and how he refuses to say anything. Jeez, the look on your beloved cousin¡¯s face¡­ I really want to show it to you.¡± Orpheus stared at me and sighed as if he¡¯d given up. ¡°Let¡¯s go, Diana. It¡¯s pointless to say anything else.¡± ¡°But, Orphe¡­¡± ¡°Go ahead, you don¡¯t have to worry about me. I don¡¯t plan on accompanying you on this stupid farce any longer.¡± I ignored Diana, who looked as if she was trying to say something and passed them. Then, Orpheus whispered in his low voice, ¡°It seems like we need to have a thorough talk with just the two of us.¡± I stopped and frowned as if I was regretting what I did, ¡°I refuse. I don¡¯t want to hear you lecture me, and I don¡¯t have anything to talk to you about. If you have free time, then give your attention to your cute Diana.¡± Diana called me, but I didn¡¯t turn back. I quickly went up the stairs and returned to my room on the 2nd floor. As soon as I got into the room, I violently stripped off my hair ornaments and necklace and threw them furiously at the mirror. ¡°Argh! I¡¯m tired!¡± I collapsed onto the couch as I watched Renee pick up the ornaments, laid on my back and shouted. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m honestly exhausted. I had to sit in the shaking carriage while lacking sleep and then I was, unfortunate, to come across those two together. Also, we had an exchange where it would have been better if we¡¯d ignored each other. My body and mind are tired. I¡¯m so tired that my head hurts. If it had just been my husband there, then it would have been fine, but it was challenging to act like that when his cousin is also there. I want to cry when I see her sad, and when I hear her shameless excuses, I get angry enough to want to push her away. My feelings for Diana are more complicated than my feelings for Orpheus. ¡°I¡¯ve had enough. It¡¯s too much trouble to change. I¡¯ll just sleep like this. Ah, but before that¡­ Renee, call Claire here after you¡¯ve finished putting away my things. I need to talk to her for a little bit¡­ What¡¯s with that look? It¡¯s not like I¡¯m going to bully her. I just want to ask her something. Gah, I¡¯m sleepy so leave my things over there and call Claire first! I¡¯ll get her to do something about them, you can just change with Claire!¡± Renee bowed deeply and walked out of the room. After a while, a soft knock sounded at the door, so I said, ¡°Come in.¡± Claire¡¯s terrified face popped out from behind the door. ¡°I, I¡¯m sorry for making you wait, Madam. I heard that you were asking for me¡­¡± ¡°You¡¯re late!¡± I got up furiously and yelled at Claire. Her tiny body immediately curled within itself, and her face looked like she was going to cry at any moment. ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± After I stared at her for a while, my attitude changed, and I smiled. ¡°You¡¯re terrific, Claire. You looked just like a maid who fears her selfish mistress. You looked like an abused puppy.¡± Claire smiled brightly as if her frightened attitude from before was just a lie. ¡°No way, I¡¯m no match for you, Madam. Madam¡¯s realistic acting sometimes sends shivers down my spine. It¡¯s scary even if I know that you¡¯re acting like that on purpose¡­¡± ¡°Really? But you¡¯re better at it than me.¡± Countess Rosenstein is hated by the people of this mansion because of her selfishness. But not all the servants are my enemy. There is one person who knows about my circumstances, and that is Claire. She has been taking care of me ever since I got married to my husband and has served me very well. I confessed my feelings for my husband to her while crying, and she promised that she would stay by my side no matter what happens and would cooperate with me until I am satisfied. She usually pretends to be frightened of me and help my notoriety grow, but when we¡¯re alone, we return to our original relationship. She listens to me and comforts me. That¡¯s why I try to laugh in front of Claire. When I laugh, she also smiles with ease. It was hard for me to laugh from the bottom of my heart, but it was easy to fake it. I can act like a foolish woman because I have Claude¡¯s and Claire¡¯s support, and they are both important to me. ¡°I¡¯m sure you have talent for theatre, Claire¡­ Oh- yes!¡± I got up and began searching through my things that were placed at the corner of the room. I took out a light brown bag from inside and offered it to Claire, who was approaching me in curiosity, ¡°It¡¯s for you.¡± ¡°They¡¯re baked sweets. I made them with Claude yesterday. They¡¯re delicious, so eat it when you get hungry.¡± I sometimes give Claire presents in secret. I made some baked sweets with Claude yesterday and brought some back with me because I wanted to give them to her. ¡°Oh, Madam!¡± ¡°Sorry for giving you something like that. I want to give you something better, but I couldn¡¯t go to the market this time¡­ If I get the chance to visit the market next time, then I¡¯ll buy you something better.¡± ¡°But Madam, it¡¯s fine! It¡¯s more than I deserve!¡± ¡°It¡¯s not. You really do a great job looking after me. There¡¯s no punishment for giving you something as thanks. I really want to give Renee something as well, but she¡¯ll grow suspicious of me if I do it now.¡± ¡°But Madam, we have our wages¡­¡± ¡°I always give you a hard time, so it¡¯s fine for you to receive something on top of that, right? It¡¯s also a way for me to give you my gratitude¡­ You eat that properly and tell me what you think of it, okay? I¡¯m confident that it tastes good.¡± Claire rubbed her watery eyes and said, ¡°Thank you very much,¡± as she held the bag carefully. We chatted as we usually did and got hungry, so we snacked on the baked sweets. We spent time together peacefully. I felt a little better after that and would have probably been fine staying up, but I had told Renee that I was going to take a nap. Claire helped me change my clothes, and I went to bed. Chapter 7 - Pain Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles A few hours later, my sleep was naturally cut off, and my eyes opened. I had asked Claire to come to wake me up in the evening, but she didn¡¯t need to. My headache, which should have subdued, had gotten worse. It was painful, and it felt like it was being beaten with a hammer. I sighed. It¡¯s probably because I slept too much. I moved my heavy body because I was awfully thirsty and got off my bed. I picked up the jug of water that was on the dresser, poured it into a glass cup and gulped it down. When the lukewarm water slid down my throat, my mind became clear, and my headache felt a little bit better. I suddenly looked at the big mirror in front of me. A woman with a bad complexion and a gloomy expression was reflected in the clear mirror. Her ruffled hair that fell on her shoulders and back coupled with her gloomy face made her look like a ghost. ¨D¨D¨D What an ugly face. Her appearance was completely different from Diana¡¯s shining one, whom I met in the afternoon, and it was appalling to think that such a woman was acting selfish and domineering. I pressed my hands on my forehead to relieve my pounding headache, sat down on the bed and held my head. ¨D¨D¨D It hurts. I hung my head down in depression, but that finally became painful, so I laid back down again. I closed my eyes tightly and endured the pounding pain. I don¡¯t know how long I did that for, but after a while, I heard a knock at the door. I thought that Claire had come to wake me up, so I gave her permission to enter the room. ¡°Excuse me.¡± Standing behind the door was a young man who was stylishly dressed in the black uniform that the servants wore. He had dark brown hair, grey eyes, fair skin and delicate features. He would look friendly if he laughed, but the expression that he directed towards me was stern, and I didn¡¯t feel any courtesy from him. I got up with a frown, brushed away my bangs which were in the way and said, ¡°Oh my, this is rare for you to come to my room. Right, Juris?¡± The young man¡¯s name is Juris Heiman. He is still young, but he is a butler of this mansion. ¡°You look awful, Madam,¡± a cold voice originated from his thin lips. Juris hates me, and it clearly showed in his attitude. He is gentle and friendly to everyone, but he takes a blatant attitude when he is in front of me. However, Juris¡¯s reaction is very reasonable if you think about my daily behaviour. It was natural for people to hate me if they are decent human beings. As for servants, they might be disqualified to be one. ¡°What can I do? I was sleeping until just a little while ago. If you don¡¯t like it, then get out. I want to nap again,¡± I said purposely even though my drowsiness had already been blown away and I was unlikely to get any sleep tonight. I had to act selfish and domineering even in front of Juris. Juris made an expression that looked like the one his master would make, and sighed deeply. ¡°It¡¯s already evening.¡± ¡°What¡¯s wrong with sleeping when I want to sleep even if it¡¯s in the evening or during the daytime?¡± Juris shrugged his shoulders as if he was stunned and stepped inside the room. Claire and Renee appeared from behind him one after the other. They stopped at the door and bowed like usual. I looked at Claire, and she glanced at Juris, then she bowed her head again apologetically. ¡°What? So, you guys are here too? You look like rats hiding secretly behind Juris.¡± Claire and Renee didn¡¯t change their expressions, but Juris frowned. ¡°Stop bullying your servants.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not bullying them. I¡¯m just saying what I think. Don¡¯t stand separately at the corner of my eyes¡­ So, what is it? What do you want with me?¡± ¡°Lord Orpheus has summoned you.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t want to. Is he going to lecture me again? I¡¯d already refused him, but did he not hear what I said? I wonder if he was too focused on his dear Diana. Ah, it¡¯s such a joke that I have to see him twice a day¡­¡± ¡°He wants you to have dinner with him.¡± I was playing with my hair in irritation, but those words made my hands stop. I didn¡¯t know why he was inviting me to eat with him at this point in time and asked in return, ¡°Hah?¡± ¡°Dinner, you say? What?¡± ¡°Just what it is, Madam. Lord Orpheus wants to have dinner with his wife tonight. So please get ready now. Do your hair, change your clothes and put on makeup¡­¡± ¡°That¡¯s a joke!¡± I jumped off the bed and raised my voice. My brain jolted because of my sudden movement, and my head hurt badly, but I was in the middle of acting, so I firmly endured it. ¡°Why do I have to have dinner with that man? No, I don¡¯t want to! I refuse!¡± ¡°Ma-madam¡­¡± Perhaps because I had suddenly shouted, Claire¡¯s shoulders shook from behind Juris. I apologised for surprising her in my head and argued vehemently, ¡°He¡¯s just going to nag me again anyway! What¡¯s with him? I¡¯ve already heard enough from him yesterday morning. What?! Is bullying me that much fun?!¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know what Lord Orpheus is thinking. I have been ordered by him to bring you to him.¡± ¡°Then tell him I said no!¡± ¡°I have been ordered to bring you to him. If you don¡¯t want to eat with him, then please tell him directly.¡± ¡°Juris! Are you not going to listen to me even though you¡¯re just a servant?!¡± I screamed hysterically. I laughed inside at the horrible high-pitched and selfish scream. Claire widened her eyes in surprise, met my eyes and nodded in admiration. However, it didn¡¯t seem to work on Juris, who was used to my tantrums, and he remained calm as if he hadn¡¯t heard anything. He turned back nonchalantly and ordered the two maids who were waiting behind him, ¡°Help her get ready.¡± ¡°Hey!¡± I raised my voice in objection, but he glared at me. ¡°If you are unsatisfied with me, then please tell your complaints to Lord Orpheus.¡± ¡°What did you say?!¡± I knew that it was useless for me to complain about him. My clenched hands shook, and I grind my teeth in annoyance. ¡°You¡¯re really annoying! ¡­ Fine, alright! If you¡¯re going to say that much, then I¡¯ll go! ¨D¨D¨D Claire and Renee, just fix my hair and makeup! Once I¡¯m done, I¡¯ll do what that man wants and complain until his ears fall out!¡± I drove out Juris with words appropriate for a loser¡¯s remark and ordered Claire and Renee to start my preparations. I had told them to only fix my hair and makeup, but the skirt part of my dress was full of wrinkles and looked terrible, so I ended up changing into another dress. I chose a chiffon dress in pale yellow with no useless decorations. I took many deep breaths while walking to the dining room and tried to calm the feelings welling up inside of me. ¨D¨D¨D I will have to argue with Orpheus once more. When I thought that, I wanted to run back to my room and shut myself inside, but I scolded myself and continued forward. I went down the stairs, continued through the corridor, stopped in front of the dining room and took another deep breath. ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s okay. There¡¯s nothing to be afraid of. As I passed through the door and raised my face, I was fascinated by the beauty of the dining room that was shining in the sunset. It was beautiful. It looked like a scene in a painting. The walls were white, but the furnishings, table and cutlery were all dyed in red, and the vivid scene reflected clearly in my eyes. And far more beautiful than this scene is my husband, who is sitting on the other side of the rectangular table, ¨D¨D¨D Orpheus. His handsome fair-complexion looked even more charming as the sunset illuminated his face; it was really bewitching. I know what his eye colour is, but I want to confirm what colour is hidden behind those delicate eyelids. Is he sleeping? Or is he thinking? His back was leaned against the chair, and his closed eyes didn¡¯t even quiver. ¡°Orpheus,¡± I whispered in the silent dining room, but Orpheus didn¡¯t open his eyes. He was asleep. I came here to complain, but I feel like he has killed my start. I stood still in my spot with nothing to do. I stared at his face for a while, but he showed no signs of waking, so I looked around while wondering what was up. The table was covered in a white cloth and at the centre was a rose of the same colour. The silver candlesticks were lit, the polished dishes were arranged in an orderly fashion, and he even had a bottle of wine prepared. It looked as if dinner would start as soon as I sat down. There must be no waiter around because they happen to be away. Or are they preparing to carry the food here? ¡°Jeez. I can¡¯t believe he¡¯s sleeping when he¡¯s the one who summoned me¡­¡± I stood next to Orpheus and put a hand on his shoulder to shake him awake. At that moment, I saw his handsome face and was charmed by his defenceless sleeping face, so my hands stopped. ¡°¡­ Look at him sleeping without a care,¡± I cursed him to mask the feelings that were welling up within me, but it was already too late. My heart was filled with emotions, and it ached. ¨D¨D¨D I love you. I love you. I love you so much. I love you so much that it¡¯s killing me. I love you. I want to protect him even if I have to abandon everything. I want to make him happy. If my wish could come true, then I want to tell him my feelings right now, hug him and lock him up so that no one can see him. I want to make him only mine. I love you. I love this person more than anyone and anything. ¡°Orpheus. ¨D¨D¨D Lord Orpheus.¡± My beloved won¡¯t wake up. His figure is just like a statue of a god from mythology. His white skin which looked transparent to his loosely wavy black hair and his deep blue eyes which are hidden underneath his eyelids. His sharp nose and thin lips which were slightly red. There were no extra bits and pieces to his slender body, and it was supple like a drawn sword. He is absurdly handsome and even now, I¡¯m so shocked that I can¡¯t even breathe. But even if his face is burnt and inflamed, and he becomes so ugly that people wouldn¡¯t want to see him twice, I would probably still think that he is handsome and continue to love him. I left my right hand on Orpheus¡¯s shoulder and touched his white cheek with my other hand. My trembling fingers lightly brushed against his skin, and I gently brushed away the black hair on his forehead. I put my face near his ears and mouthed, ¡°I love you.¡± I missed the smell of his cologne, which smelt like the deep green forest and his own unique scent, and it almost made me cry. The pain tightened my chest and I couldn¡¯t breathe. Why did we turn out like this even though I can clearly recall his warmth and breathe from when we slept together, and I felt that we were so close back in those days? Now a deep gap that will never be buried has opened up between us, and it keeps getting deeper every day. We are standing on the brink of a rift, and we hurt each other with cold glances and exchanges. ¨D¨D¨D I know. I¡¯m the one in the wrong. It wasn¡¯t anybody¡¯s fault. Because I chose this. Still, I can¡¯t help but think like this sometimes. ¡°¨D¨D¨DWould you have loved me if Diana wasn¡¯t here and I was still trying to be worthy of being your wife?¡± The days that have passed cannot be returned. There¡¯s no point in making guesses about the past. More importantly, my small voice will not reach Orpheus in his sleep, so he won¡¯t answer my question. Even if I knew this, the silence felt as if it was refusing me, and I closed my eyes because I couldn¡¯t endure the pain that had increased in my head and chest. When we had just gotten married, Orpheus had been kind. He had fulfilled his duties as a husband. He took me out even though I had the habit of secluding myself inside, he went shopping with me, and, of course, he attended evening parties and tea parties with me. He would have dinner with me whenever he could, and he would sleep by my side in my room at night. When I told him that I liked roses, he promised that he would deliver them to my room every day when the roses in the garden bloomed. Orpheus had been kind. He had been so sweet that it had puzzled me. And yet, I deliberately kept him at a distance. The waiter didn¡¯t return. The red-lit room was extremely quiet, and Orpheus and I were alone without anyone to disturb us. Orpheus was still asleep ¨D¨D¨D. ¡°I¡¯m sorry. I¡¯m really sorry, Orpheus.¡± I gently kissed his black hair like I had done so many times before. I closed my eyes and pictured the days that had passed and would never return. Chapter 8 - The Past 01 Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles Behind my closed eyelids, I pictured the past that will never return. I vividly recalled the happy and painful past. ??????? I still remember the day when my marriage was decided. It was a freezing afternoon. ¡°Master is calling you. He has something to talk to you about.¡± A voice called out to me from behind me as I was sweeping the fallen leaves that were blown by the fierce northern wind, and I turned back. There stood a servant boy of the same age as me. He glared at me in displeasure. Why do I have to do something like this? ¨D¨D¨D This was written on the boy¡¯s face. He got even more annoyed when I just stood there without replying. ¡°Are you listening? If you are, then answer. Simpleton.¡± I became even more speechless when I was attacked with cold scorn. Idiot, blockhead, useless, and simpleton. Endless insults got hurled my way. My heart still felt like it was being gouged out even if I was used to the pain. My heart, which was flowing with blood, chilled, and I felt as if it had frozen over. I froze while gripping the broom handle. The hard feeling of the handle brought me back, and I felt like I was even being rejected by inorganic matter. The boy lost his temper at not receiving a reply from me no matter how long he stood there. He said over his shoulders, ¡°Hurry up and go,¡± before leaving. I watched as the dead leaves chased after him with a rustle and lamented that I had to sweep again. ¨D¨D¨D It won¡¯t become clean no matter how much I sweep. I fixed my hood, raised my face and saw the grey and cloudy winter sky. It looked like it would rain at any time. The fallen leaves stick to the ground when it rains, and it becomes difficult to sweep. I wanted to finish cleaning before that happened, but even a simpleton like me understood that the master¡¯s order had priority. I gave up, put the broom and dustpan away and went to where the master was. ¡°You¡¯re slow.¡± I was struck with this comment as soon as I entered his study and bowed my head in apology. I saw a middle-aged man standing at the window that was the only light source of this dim room when I raised my face. He frowned as if he was looking at something disgusting. In contrast to me, the man was wearing a luxurious velvet jacket with a silk shirt with lots of lace underneath. His pants and shoes were also first-class goods. However, the delicate buttons on his shirt looked as if they would flip off at any moment because he was fat. His face was round and made it seem like his handsome face from his youth was a lie. His cheeks and chin were full of fat. The only thing that hadn¡¯t changed was his vibrant blonde hair. That day, he had it combed to the back of his head so that it wouldn¡¯t become dishevelled. ¨D¨D¨D A pig in noble clothes. In those days, I called him this; an ugly and greedy pig with no grace. The man¡¯s name is Rudolph Heinz von Lagerfeld. A noble with the rank of Marquis and the master of this mansion. At the same time, he was my master and father. I was a child born between this man and my mother, who was a prostitute, and I was taken to this man¡¯s home six years ago when my mother passed away because of an epidemic disease. ¡°What do you want to talk to me about?¡± I asked while looking down at my black and dirty hands, and he replied by clicking his tongue. What he didn¡¯t like was probably my very existence. I think it¡¯s funny. It was all this man¡¯s fault that I existed and looked dirty. ¡°Stop acting like a servant. You¡¯ll be trained in etiquette and culture from tomorrow.¡± ¡°What is the meaning of this?¡± I asked. The man twisted his face in disgust. ¡°It means that you¡¯ll be treated as my daughter.¡± What are you saying now? I was insulted as a prostitute¡¯s daughter and as a greedy girl. You worked me hard and told me that if I wanted to stay in this house, then I had to work as a servant. You worked me until my back started hurting, took away my meals if I slacked off by finding fault in me and threw me in the cold. And yet, why are you saying such a thing now¡­? ¡°What¡¯s with that look? The extremely greedy you is going to be treated as a noble¡¯s daughter, you know? What don¡¯t you like? You should be grateful and rub your head against the floor,¡± the man said. I couldn¡¯t look him straight in the face as he laughed unpleasantly, so I looked down. I slowly kneeled down, put my hands on the floor, and lowered my head while grovelling. ¡°Thank you, master.¡± The floor was cold and froze my heart. At that time, I didn¡¯t just feel the pain that I was used to, I also knew that this was humiliation. So, I didn¡¯t resist. It was better to throw away what little pride I had instead of opposing him and getting hit. ¡°Why¡­¡± ¡°What?¡± He asked, probably because it was hard to hear me while I was grovelling. I slowly lifted my face, sat down on the floor and asked again, ¡°Would you tell me why?¡± ¡°I¡¯m going to use you as a pawn. I¡¯ll marry you off.¡± ¡°Marry?¡± ¡°Yes. Rejoice. Your partner is a young nobleman. He doesn¡¯t just have money, he¡¯s also good-looking. He¡¯s a waste on someone like you with a low rank.¡± I had no choice but to doubt my ears. I was dumbfounded and muttered, ¡°Why me?¡± This man had another daughter who was turning 16 this year. She was a lady who was raised carefully like a princess; she was a genuine noble¡¯s daughter. Wouldn¡¯t it be better to marry off that girl instead of me, who is of low birth and hadn¡¯t been educated? ¡°Idiot, there¡¯s only you. Victoria is the heir to the Lagerfeld House. She won¡¯t be getting married into another house. We will adopt her husband.¡± I remembered something important when I saw that he wasn¡¯t going to stop laughing. This man wasn¡¯t satisfied if he didn¡¯t make me unhappy. In place of my mother, he wants to make me, his daughter, unhappy. That was why he took me in as an orphan. ¡ºCome to my house, Ophelia. Let¡¯s live together.¡» He extended his hand to me with a smile on his face, and yet, as soon as we arrived at the mansion, he slapped my palm away. ¡ºYou will be punished in place of your traitor mother.¡» He severely abused me, worked me to the bone and beat me up whenever he was in a bad mood. The servants understood what he wanted and banded together to oppress me. They vented their dissatisfaction on me. ¡ºI won¡¯t let you be happy. I¡¯ll make you suffer more than I have.¡» The man mother loved wasn¡¯t here anymore. There was only a pitiful and ugly man, who wasn¡¯t able to carry out his feelings and was distorted by his despair. And that wasn¡¯t my father. We may be connected by blood, but he wasn¡¯t my father. ¡°You¡¯ll be trained for two months. I¡¯ll arrange a tutor, so you¡¯ll become the perfect lady. You¡¯re worthless if you can¡¯t do this. You can go do the same job as your mother or enter the monastery.¡± I¡¯m sure this marriage wasn¡¯t a normal marriage. There must be a catch because the other party¡¯s conditions are good. I filled my heart with anger so that it wouldn¡¯t be filled with pain. My heart won¡¯t freeze or feel sad if I do this. But there was a burning urge inside me. ¡°I took someone like you in with no compensation, and let you stay in this house. I gave you clothes to wear and food to eat. I let you live, so return the favour,¡± the man finished speaking and waved his hand to tell me to get out. ¡°I get angry looking at that face that looks like your mother¡¯s. Good grief, I would have loved you if you hadn¡¯t looked like her.¡± I stood up, bowed and headed to the door. I tried not to see what expression he was making. It didn¡¯t matter whether he was glaring or sneering. I walked quickly through the dim corridor. The head maid will reprimand me like a demon if I don¡¯t get back to work quickly. That woman wouldn¡¯t listen even if I told her that I was called by the master. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, but¡­ I suddenly changed my mind and stopped. That man told me to stop acting like a servant. It was a joke that he omitted the fact that he was working me to the bone and instead called it acting, but I had no choice but to obey him. I don¡¯t have to wear tattered clothes, and I don¡¯t have to worry about sweeping the fallen leaves even if I see rain. ¨D¨D¨D As of tomorrow, I will be a lady of the Lagerfeld House. I was driven by the urge to shout and covered my face with both hands. ¡°I won¡¯t be unhappy.¡± This is his mansion. So, I have to obey his orders while I¡¯m in this mansion. I will aim to become the perfect lady, and if I can¡¯t, then I will do what that man wants and become a prostitute or a nun. But it will be different once I¡¯m out of this mansion. ¡°I won¡¯t be unhappy,¡± I swore. I smelt dry dirt from the cracked hands. I was given a decent room instead of the storage from the day I was ordered to get married and wore a dress instead of the tattered servant clothes. This navy and grey dress was remarkably plain when compared to the dresses that his daughter, Victoria, wore, and was something that a widow would wear, but it was much more comfortable than the dirty and tattered servant clothes. I was given three meals a day without fail, and I was able to sleep in a warm bed at night. The tutor came three days later. Our greeting was rushed, and she thoroughly taught me etiquette and culture. In some cases, she was a strict tutor who would relentlessly whip me. I was taught how to read simple things by my late mother, and when I returned the textbook that the tutor had given me to learn simple spelling, I said, ¡°I can read and write. I can recite poems a little. I will learn etiquette, but you might have forgotten that I don¡¯t have much time. I can¡¯t dance, and I don¡¯t know anything about music. Based on this, I would like to ask for guidance¡­ I don¡¯t mind being whipped as many times as you want if I can be a perfect lady.¡± My life would be over if I can¡¯t become a perfect lady. It would be my downfall, and that man would be pleased. Therefore, I was desperate. I studied frantically and learnt etiquette and culture. Chapter 9 - The Past 0 Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles It was a month later that I first met my marriage partner. My marriage partner was the one who wanted to meet, and that man consented because I learnt enough about etiquette and culture not to be embarrassing in public. However, the fact may be that he couldn¡¯t go against someone of higher standing. That man had my marriage partner invest in his business in exchange for one of his two daughters, and he chose me without hesitation. His beloved daughter wouldn¡¯t be the one who would be held hostage, the detestable girl would be. Of course, I remember that day¡­ the day when I first met Orpheus more vividly than when I was ordered to marry him. That day was also a cold afternoon. However, the weather was good, unlike a month ago. There were no clouds in the sky, and the bright sunlight shone in the parlour. That man had said that my marriage partner not only had money, but was also good-looking, and he was undoubtedly right. Earl Rosenstein, Orpheus Dimitri von Rosenstein is a handsome young man with black hair and blue eyes, and he had a melancholy aura. ¡°It¡¯s a pleasure to meet you, Earl Rosenstein.¡± ¡°Call me Orpheus. Please let me call you Ophelia, too.¡± He smiled lightly and replied in a friendly way when I greeted him while admiring his handsome appearance. ¡°Then, I¡¯ll do that,¡± I answered and felt somewhat uncomfortable. If I look closely at Orpheus¡¯s smile, I could see that it didn¡¯t reach his eyes. His mouth was drawn in a bewitching arc, but his blue eyes were cold. He shot an icy glance, which was appropriate for his eye colour, my way. I couldn¡¯t feel any goodwill coming from him, and his eyes made me feel the complete opposite of that. ¨D¨D¨D What is he not satisfied with? That man told me to stay silent about being a prostitute¡¯s daughter. So, he probably hadn¡¯t told Earl Rosenstein either. The reason why I¡¯m disliked is probably not because of that. Is it my impression? Or appearance? Or perhaps both? I¡¯m not a beauty. I prepared myself to some extent, but I felt horribly miserable when I actually saw him look at me like this. I don¡¯t care if the servants of the house hate me, but it was different when it came to my future husband. I pulled back my stiff smile so that he wouldn¡¯t hate me more and stood still while that man and Orpheus talked. Then, when it felt like an infinity had passed, Orpheus said, ¡°Could I talk with your daughter alone?¡± ¡°Ah¡­ I don¡¯t mind¡­ What about you, Ophelia?¡± ¡°Can you have a proper conversation?¡± ¨D¨D¨D That man glared at me and said. Honestly, I was worried about being alone with Earl Rosenstein, but I can¡¯t refuse. ¡°It¡¯s fine,¡± I nodded, and that man walked past me. He whispered in my ear, ¡°Don¡¯t say anything unnecessary,¡± before leaving. ¡°He¡¯s a strict father.¡± Orpheus smiled wryly. ¡°Did you hear him?¡± I asked, and he replied, ¡°My ears are good.¡± ¡°Most importantly, your father¡¯s voice is a bit too loud.¡± ¡°I¡¯m very sorry for showing you something ugly.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t worry about it. Your father is probably just worried about you.¡± I sincerely thought that it was good that my head was facing down since I couldn¡¯t maintain the smile on my face. That man was worried about something else, but I endured this because I would be in trouble if this marriage fell through. I smiled again and lifted my face. Our conversation continued. He had excellent conversational skills, and he was also a good listener. I was weary because he had asked a lot of personal questions, but I had already prepared the answers in advance, so I couldn¡¯t accidentally slip up. ¡°By the way, I have something to tell you,¡± Orpheus abruptly said when the conversation came to a pause. ¡°What is it?¡± I corrected my posture, and he began talking seriously, ¡°You may have heard about this from your father, but I have a cousin. She¡¯s 23 years old now, but she has been living with me for six years because she¡¯s blind and has no other relatives.¡± Of course, I haven¡¯t heard about this. All he told me was the bare minimum, which was that Orpheus was rich and good-looking. That man didn¡¯t tell me his age or position in court. ¡°She told me that she was going to leave the mansion when I told her that I was getting married. She said that you might hate her. However, it took six years before she was finally able to move around a room by herself. If she moves to a new environment, then she would have to start all over again. If she doesn¡¯t have a chaperone, then she will live a crippled life where she can¡¯t do anything.¡± I finally saw where he was going with this. Orpheus wants me to let his cousin stay in the mansion after we get married. He wants me to accept the presence of his cousin, who has an impairment and has no other relatives. ¡°Six years ago. Did it have to do with the epidemic?¡± I asked after thinking a little, and Orpheus nodded. ¡°Yes. She lost her parents to the epidemic, and she managed to survive even though she had suffered from it as well. But she lost her sight. She had a fianc¨¦ at that time, but it was cancelled¡­¡± ¨D¨D¨D Then, why don¡¯t you marry that cousin of yours? I thought but didn¡¯t say out loud. He might not want to marry her out of sympathy when there is no love involved. Or, he might have preferred to get married to a daughter from a distinguished family instead of a woman with no backing, because it came with benefits. It was callous, but I heard noble marriages were like this. For them, love is something they can enjoy after marriage. And, I had no right to refuse this marriage even if Orpheus loved another woman. I was that man¡¯s tool, and I had no choice but to obey his order. ¡°I¡¯m sorry to hear about that,¡± instead, common words came out of my mouth, but I also meant half of it. Six years ago, a raging epidemic took the lives of many people, regardless of their rank. My mother was also one of the victims. However, the pain and sadness that Orpheus¡¯s cousin received when she lost her family, her eyesight and got abandoned by her fianc¨¦e, was far worse than mine. I sympathised with her even though I hadn¡¯t met her yet, and I didn¡¯t want her to experience more pain than she already had. ¡°Please continue to let her stay in your mansion. She doesn¡¯t have to worry about me.¡± ¡°Do you really not mind?¡± Orpheus¡¯s gaze softened when I nodded, and he said, ¡°Thanks.¡± ¡°I¡¯m lucky to be able to marry a kind woman like you. I¡¯m so glad to have met you.¡± That was probably lip service. Still, I was so happy to hear them that my cheeks turned red. I felt that this was the first time someone other than mother had accepted my existence, and I was filled with joy. ¡°I feel the same way.¡± I looked straight into Orpheus¡¯s blue eyes and admired his beauty again. His snow white face was really handsome, and I stared at it too intensely, and¡­ that was when I knew. The swirling blackness deep in his cold eyes. A feeling which was close to depression and resentment, which was a characteristic of those who had suffered enough pain to distort their character. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, this person¡­ At that moment, I realised. That Orpheus was the same kind of person as me. He went through a dark past like I had and made it to today. ¨D¨D¨D I see. So, it¡¯s not just me? A strange impulse welled up within me. They were feelings that I couldn¡¯t understand nor put into words. It was like we were two sides of the same coin, I wanted to hug him, or refuse and reject him as much as I could. When I noticed this, I said to control my inner turmoil, ¡°I¡¯m the same as you. I¡¯m delighted to meet you, Earl Rosenstein.¡± I curtsied slowly and thought that I wouldn¡¯t mind marrying this person. I thought that we would understand each other. Chapter 10 - Past 03 Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles The marriage was a month earlier than planned at Orpheus¡¯s request, and I got onto the carriage without anyone seeing me off. I had already sent my luggage ahead of time, so I went to the Rosenstein House with just myself alone. When I arrived at my husband¡¯s home, the butler, Juris, and the head maid, Elze, greeted me. The other servants were already lined up in the hall, and they bowed deeply and politely as I entered the hall. A girl came out of the line and named herself Claire. She was the maid who would be taking care of me, and I got the impression that she was innocent and honest from her nervous expression. ¨D¨D¨D I think I¡¯ll be able to get along with this girl. Orpheus appeared from the stairs in the centre of the hall when I vaguely thought that. He wasn¡¯t alone. He was accompanied by a petite woman. ¡°Ah, Lord Orpheus. Miss Diana is with you too,¡± I heard Juris say, and thought, so that¡¯s his cousin. The woman was adorable, just like a flower sprite. She had blonde hair, which was close to white, dreamy light blue eyes, and a small and delicate face. She had a slender body with thin arms and legs and wore a fluffy light blue dress. Orpheus and Diana contrasted each other with black and white when they stood next to each other, and, together, they looked like a pair of dolls. Their linked arms looked as if they were lovers, and I couldn¡¯t help but be suspicious of their relationship, but Diana just said this, ¡°I¡¯m sorry for borrowing your husband¡¯s arm. But, please don¡¯t misunderstand anything. I am just his cousin, and this person is just like a brother to me. We don¡¯t have a strange relationship at all.¡± Diana¡¯s eyes stared at a place which was a little off from where I was actually standing. I wasn¡¯t suspicious of her, but she was practically looking at me, and I wondered once again if she really was blind. As she said, they were probably linking arms so that he could guide her. Unfortunately, she couldn¡¯t walk freely without the help of others. I pushed the hazy discomfort to the back of my mind and put a tight lid on it so that it wouldn¡¯t come out. ¡°I¡¯ve heard about it, Miss Diana. Please don¡¯t mind me. I don¡¯t blame you since there are circumstances behind this.¡± Diana looked relieved and said, ¡°I want you to call me Diana.¡± I replied, ¡°Then, please call me Ophelia too,¡± and she smiled joyfully. Orpheus laughed next to her. However, the servants were different. Their attitude was strange in a way. Some looked bitter and averted their gaze by looking down. Some looked at Orpheus and Diana with moist eyes, and some¡­ glared at me with hateful eyes as if they were stabbing me with their gaze. Juris had a somewhat lonely smile, Elze stared at me with hate, and Claire stood still while looking puzzled. I suddenly remembered that man¡¯s words because of their reaction. ¡ºI won¡¯t let you be happy. I¡¯ll make you suffer more than I have.¡» ¨D¨D¨D Is that how it is? There were too many unnatural points to laugh it off as a misunderstanding, and I stood still because I didn¡¯t know what to do. After that, we signed the marriage certificate, and I was guided to my room. I broached the topic with Claire while drinking the tea I was served, ¡°This mansion is wonderful. Both Lord Orpheus and Miss Diana are nice. But I don¡¯t seem to be welcome here.¡± I wasn¡¯t good with beating around the bush, so I spoke frankly, and Claire suddenly stopped cutting the cake, ¡°Lord Orpheus and Miss Diana are more than cousins, aren¡¯t they? You and the servants know this, and that¡¯s why they don¡¯t have good feelings towards me.¡± Claire turned back while looking pale and said, ¡°Madam, I¡¯m sorry. Everyone has gone weird because they adore the Master and Miss Diana. To be presented with such such an outrageous attitude¡­ you must have felt uncomfortable. I¡¯m really sorry.¡± ¡°Claire, lift your head. It¡¯s not your fault.¡± The servants are also humans. Even though they are usually faithful to their duties, they might have been too excessive while supporting the relationship between their master and his lover. As a result, they lacked calmness and took actions which weren¡¯t appropriate for their positions. ¡°I¡¯m not blaming them. I just wanted to check the facts. Otherwise, I wouldn¡¯t know how to behave in the future,¡± I said as I thought. ©`©`©` If that¡¯s the case, then why didn¡¯t he marry the woman he loved instead of me? The Lagerfeld House is an old House, but they¡¯re not very wealthy and are rural nobles. That man might have had a good explanation if he wanted financing, but if so, then he didn¡¯t need to marry me off. The current Lagerfeld House isn¡¯t appealing enough for nobles in the capital, who have both status and money, to want to connect their House by marriage. Claire shook her head, ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± ¡°Master and Miss Diana both deny their relationship in front of me and the servants. They say that they both don¡¯t love each other. Even though they¡¯re so close.¡± My questions only deepened, but it didn¡¯t take long for me to find out why. ¡°There¡¯s something I¡¯d like to tell you.¡± That night, after dinner, I was relaxing on the couch in my assigned room, and Orpheus said this while sitting next to me. He worried about my body since I had been sitting in a swaying carriage for half the day and asked, ¡°Shall I tell you tomorrow?¡± But, I declined, ¡°It¡¯s okay, please tell me now.¡± ¡°You must have been curious about why I chose you as my wife,¡± Orpheus spoke as the candlelight swayed. ¡°Because, this was the last request of my father, the former Earl Rosenstein. He requested that I marry Ophelia, the daughter who Lord Lagerfeld took in, into the Rosenstein House. This happened a year ago. One night on his deathbed, father summoned me and ordered me to make you my wife.¡± I honestly have no idea what he was talking about. Why did the former Earl Rosenstein, who I don¡¯t know, know about my existence and want me to be his son¡¯s wife? The only thing that comes to mind is¡­ ¡°Lord Orpheus, do you know my mother?¡± That man had told me not to talk about this, but Lord Orpheus probably already knew my mother from the way he spoke, so I asked him, and he answered, ¡°I heard about her from my father.¡± ¡°Did you make me your wife knowing this?¡± Did he not resist marrying a daughter of a vile prostitute who was only half noble even though it was his father¡¯s last request? However, Orpheus¡¯s answer was beyond my expectation, ¡°Yes, is that a problem?¡± He replied as if it was nothing, and I gapped. There is a mountain of problems, though¡­ Orpheus continued speaking while I remained dumbfounded, ¡°My father was one of the men who loved your mother. He couldn¡¯t get her off his mind even when she disappeared from social circles. Just before he fell ill, he found out that your mother had passed away from the epidemic six years ago, and that you, her child, had been taken in by the Lagerfeld House. He secretly went to see you when he found out and saw that you were being treated as a slave.¡± Orpheus paused and squeezed the hand, which was on my shoulder. It didn¡¯t hurt, it was just hot. ¡°He couldn¡¯t contain himself when he saw the daughter of the woman he loved, who looked like her mother, being oppressed. He thought about kidnapping you on the spot, but his servant stopped him since that would be bad. He had no choice but to think of a legal way to protect you, and, as a result, came up with the idea of letting me marry you. But he immediately fell ill straight after and it became his last request. Then, I became friendly with Lord Lagerfeld through an acquaintance and demanded that I will marry you in exchange for investment capital. I tried to hasten it as much as possible, but it still took a month and a half,¡± Orpheus said, and hugged me. He hadn¡¯t hesitated even though he knew I was a prostitute¡¯s daughter. ¡°I¡¯m sorry you had to experience painful memories until then.¡± I thought his words were miraculous as I buried my face in Orpheus¡¯s neck. While inhaling the pleasant scent of the forest, I thought about why he needed to apologise even though he had nothing to do with it and said, ¡°It¡¯s not your fault. You let me out of that house.¡± He freed me from those days of being oppressed and abused. He helped me when no one else even looked back at me. To the point that he betrayed the woman he loved¡­ My eyelids got hot as if they were being burnt. An unbearable impulse swelled up inside me, and I sobbed. ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± I broke down as soon as I said that. It was pointless, even if I tightly shut my eyes. ¡°I¡¯m sorry. I¡¯ve changed your life. I¡¯ve snatched away your chance to have a happy marriage.¡± ¡°Ophelia, that¡¯s¡­¡± I pulled myself away from Orpheus and sat on the floor as if I¡¯d fallen down. I kneeled at his feet and looked up as if I was begging for forgiveness. Orpheus tried to get me off the floor while being confused. He was as merciful and beautiful as the angels painted on the walls of the church. ¡°I can¡¯t give you more than the happiness you would have felt from that. Instead, I¡¯ll give everything I have to you, Lord Orpheus. Both my body and my mind. I don¡¯t care what kind of sacrifices I have to make for you. I¡¯ll do anything for you, and I¡¯ll endure any pain for you.¡± I couldn¡¯t think of any other way to repay the former Earl Rosenstein and Orpheus except for this. I am a person of no worth. I¡¯m only useful as a scapegoat. ¡°So please, please forgive me.¡± I looked down and could only hear the sounds of sobbing in this silent room. ¡°You¡¯re wrong,¡± Orpheus finally said in a voice that exuded dissatisfaction. I looked up in surprise. ¡°That¡¯s not it, Ophelia. The words you should say now aren¡¯t words of apology.¡± ¡°Then¡­¡± My lips trembled, and he smiled gently through my blurry vision. ¡°It¡¯s thank you. You should say that at times like this.¡± I held back the tears which were threatening to overflow again and breathed in to stop my sobs. ¡°Thank you very much, Lord Orpheus.¡± Orpheus helped me up and sat me next to him, then said as if he was scolding me, ¡°I told you that you didn¡¯t need to call me Lord.¡± He wiped my tears with his thumb. Chapter 11 Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles That night, Orpheus did nothing to me. We slept next to each other since it was our first night together, but he was worried that I was tired after my long journey and did nothing but touch me from time to time. After praising the colours of my eyes which he said, ¡°looked like the summer sky¡±, he confessed quietly, ¡°My father made a woman who looked like your mother his wife. He couldn¡¯t forget the Rose Princess, Louise. My father found a woman with black hair and made her, Katherine, the Rose Princess and loved her. But Katherine found out about this at one point and became depressed. She cheered up again after her child was born. She didn¡¯t look at my father at all and only doted on her child. However, the child, Orpheus, died before his seventh birthday. He fell into the pond.¡± The gulping sound that I had heard then probably came from my throat. I had goosebumps even though I was lying in a warm bed. ¡°Katherine went mad. She cried, went crazy and weakened because she¡¯d stopped eating. At night, she would wander around the mansion looking for her child.¡± Until then, Orpheus had been stroking my cheek, but his hand moved to my head. I could clearly feel the warmth from his hands and the stiffness of his fingers. However, I couldn¡¯t see him well, even though he was next to me. It was as if he had melted into the darkness. ¡°My father felt guilty towards Katherine and tried to return her back to normal. Then, one day, he searched for a boy who looked like his late son and adopted him. He named him Orpheus. The boy was a year older than his late son, but Katherine was happy that her son had returned and slowly returned back to sanity. But, one day, she realised that the boy wasn¡¯t her son and went mad. Six months later, she ended her life from despair.¡± Orpheus was still stroking my head. I stared into the darkness without moving. Only the sounds of us breathing could be heard in this silent room. ¡°I don¡¯t have noble blood. My parents were commoners. A man and a woman who were like trash. I was sold in the red light district or somewhere similar to be a pet doll for nobles, and my adopted father bought me. That person, Earl Rosenstein, raised me like a real son. He protected me from my adoptive mother who went crazy and tried to kill me.¡± ¡°I respect and appreciate him,¡± Orpheus whispered. ¡°So, I had to follow his last request,¡± he continued. ¡°Only Diana, Juris and Elze know about this. I wasn¡¯t going to tell you this¡­ but I wonder why? I wanted you to know about it. I thought it would be alright to tell you.¡± I exhaled slowly. I wanted to calm down my beating heart. ¡°That¡¯s why we¡¯re the same.¡± I was still shocked, but I had muttered that by the time I¡¯d realised. I honestly confided what I was thinking to Orpheus, ¡°I knew it the first time I met you. You¡¯re the same as me. We have a similar past, are equally gloomy, and somewhat distorted.¡± I was surprised by Orpheus¡¯s confession but accepted it somewhere deep down. My impression of him was correct after all. ¡°We may certainly be the same,¡± Orpheus said and hugged me. When we hugged like this, I felt a strange sense of security, and all the things that had been ripped apart had finally come together. For some reason, I felt that I had known the warmth and sensations of his arms for a long time. From that night on, I decided to devote my all to Orpheus. The feelings which I had towards him were neither love or admiration, but a strange feeling that I couldn¡¯t name, but now that I look back, I should have called it affection among kindred souls. But, once I had decided that, my feelings of not wanting to be unhappy and not wanting to follow that man¡¯s words were like a lie, and I found myself humorous. What a silly thing I had been clinging to, I thought. I had found a reason¡­ more important than my own life to live for. The next day, Orpheus showed me around the house. We went around the first floor in this order: the parlour, study, library, entrance hall, dining room, and the sections where the servants work. On the second floor, he showed me: his room, the spare rooms, the children¡¯s rooms, the bathroom and even where the servants stayed. The Rosenstein mansion was bigger than I had pictured. I listened to his explanations, and my tour was over in no time. We spent a lot of time in the library and in Orpheus¡¯s room, and I made Orpheus smile wryly as he showed me around. ¡°I know you¡¯re interested in the books in the library, but my room isn¡¯t anything special. The floor plans are the same as your room, and the furniture isn¡¯t that much different. My room just looks plainer than yours.¡± ¡°That¡¯s¡­¡± I couldn¡¯t tell him that I wanted to stay here for a second longer because he usually slept here. I really wanted to check every inch and see how the room was. I wanted to touch his traces. However, I remained silent because he would think it was disgusting if I were to be honest about this. We had a late lunch and took a walk around the garden. Most of the trees were green, and their leaves weren¡¯t falling, but the lawn had withered, and the other plants seemed to fade. There weren¡¯t any blooming flowers anywhere, and the roses planted around the garden silently endured the winter cold. Only the fountain at the end of the stone path was filled with abundant water all year round, and every time it sprouted water, the water flashed like crystals. ¡°I¡¯m looking forward to seeing these roses bloom. I¡¯m sure it¡¯ll be a wonderful sight.¡± I said as I looked at the hazy clouds in the distance, and the sloppy hill beneath them, while picturing the roses in full bloom. Red, white, yellow, pink and orange. They probably would look beautiful. ¡°Do you like roses?¡± ¡°Yes, very much. I think all women do.¡± Roses are flowers my mother never stopped loving. When I look at them, I feel nostalgia and sadness tightens my chest. ¡°When the roses bloom, I¡¯ll deliver them to your room every day.¡± ¡°Oh my, then my room would be filled with flowers. Apparently, Claire is going to decorate my room with jasmines.¡± ¡°I¡¯ll deliver more roses than the jasmines that Claire will give you,¡± Orpheus joked, and took me to the greenhouse behind the mansion. It was an everlasting summer unlike the desolate garden, and flowers which didn¡¯t bloom at this time, colourful flowers from the southern countries and plants I¡¯ve never seen before were growing everywhere. I was frightened by the rotting smell of the carnivorous plants and the lotus leaves, which were big enough to ride on, were interesting. Orpheus said that it was actually alright to ride them. ¡°Then, I¡¯ll wear clothes that are fine even if they get wet and try it,¡± I said, and Orpheus opened his eyes wide, covered his mouth with his hands and turned sideways. Apparently, he was laughing. His shoulders were trembling a little bit. ¨D¨D¨D What¡¯s strange? I wondered while waiting for his laughter to die down. Orpheus, who had finally stopped laughing, looked serious as if he hadn¡¯t laughed and said, ¡°Then, I¡¯ll lend you a hand if you fall off.¡± That night after dinner, we sat on the couch in my room and talked like yesterday. Orpheus knew a lot of things and taught me a lot, and the thing that made me the happiest was when he told me his real name. Even Diana didn¡¯t know his name, and he also told me never to call him that at the same time, so I locked away his name at the depths of my heart. Since then, we built a good relationship through days like that. Orpheus is a kind man. He was nice to a woman who he had to marry because it was his foster father¡¯s last request. We had dinner together when he didn¡¯t have any plans, we had tea, took walks together, he took me out of the mansion on weekends, we had picnics, went horseback riding, we went shopping and to the theatre. Orpheus was kinder and gentler than I deserved. I tried my best to become a suitable wife for Orpheus. I was involved in managing the mansion and his fief, I appeared in social circles, increased my acquaintances and expanded my network. In doing so, I wanted to give back to Orpheus who had freed me. However, there was one tough thing. Being his bed partner. At first, I had resisted when he embraced me. It was the wife¡¯s duty to give birth to the successor, and I knew that we wouldn¡¯t have a child if we didn¡¯t sleep together, but I hesitated when I thought about Diana. How hurt would she be if she heard that her lover had slept with another woman¡­ and had a child with her? ¨D¨D¨D There is no love, just obligation. Even if I told myself this, the feelings of guilt which resembled self-loathing didn¡¯t disappear, and the more I thought about it, the more depressed I became. As a result of my worries, I tried to tell Orpheus ¡°I don¡¯t need to give birth to a child, if another woman¡± ¨D¨D¨D I didn¡¯t dare give Diana¡¯s name ¨D¨D¨D ¡°gave birth to your child, then we wouldn¡¯t have to cross that line.¡± However, he questioned me, ¡°Do you have another man?¡± and I didn¡¯t have time to explain before he pushed me down. We started sleeping together little by little from then on. My guilt didn¡¯t disappear, but I decided that it would be quicker to give him a child or two as soon as possible and accepted his advances. I¡¯m sure Orpheus is only embracing me out of duty, and it¡¯s also hard for him. Chapter 12 Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles Merry Christmas everyone <3 When Orpheus started calling me ¡®honey¡¯ instead of ¡®you¡¯, he often said this, ¡°You¡¯re the only one who won¡¯t abandon me.¡± When the deed is over, he hugs me so tightly that I can¡¯t even breathe while pleading. I found this strange. It didn¡¯t seem like it would impact him much if he were to be abandoned by me. Were those just sweet nothings? Did he whisper that to me to make me want to do it? Was he just whispering those words to make me feel better? I don¡¯t know how he felt as he said those words, but I always answered, ¡°I won¡¯t abandon you.¡± He may abandon me, but I won¡¯t abandon him. I really thought so. Without knowing that I would break that promise. While I had a good relationship with Orpheus, I also had a decent relationship with Diana. At first, I kept my distance from her because I didn¡¯t know how to interact with her, but Diana actively spoke to me. Thanks to that, we had tea several times a week, and we visited each other¡¯s rooms. Sometimes, I would take her hand, and we would walk around the garden. The servants didn¡¯t look very happy, probably because they thought I was going to harm her, but Diana smiled joyfully. Most importantly, Orpheus was pleased when I talked about this with him. He always squinted his eyes fondly whenever I talked about Diana in detail. I loved that expression on him, so I met with Diana more. Diana is a charming woman. She is bright and is like a sunflower. She is a generous woman who treated the person who stole away her lover like everyone else. She would tell me funny stories and make me laugh. Sometimes, she would even give me advice as if she was mediating between Orpheus and I. She knew about my efforts and would sometimes thank me for my hard work. ¡°This isn¡¯t my place to say this, but Orphe won¡¯t say it, so I¡¯ll say it in his place. Ophelia, I think you¡¯re doing very well. So, don¡¯t overdo it. I¡¯m worried that you might collapse from working too hard.¡± I felt like my tears would fall every time I was told something kind. Why is this person so kind? Even though I stole this person¡¯s loved one. Even though I¡¯ve taken away her happy future. Why does she smile like that? She will probably listen to me. Sometimes, Diana would also say this, ¡°All you have to do is stay by Orpheus¡¯s side. That¡¯s all you have to do. You don¡¯t need to do anything else. I¡¯m sure Orpheus thinks the same way.¡± Diana is a good person. It was no wonder that Orpheus was attracted to her and that the servants wanted to cheer her on. But I didn¡¯t think what she said was true. If Diana was Orpheus¡¯s wife, then it might be enough just for him to be by his side. I¡¯m sure that she would give him moral support and sooth him just by smiling. But I¡¯m different. I¡¯m not that valuable to Orpheus. Having me by his side is a waste and not useful at all. If I don¡¯t act appropriate for my position even as a decorated wife, then I would feel bad for Orpheus and Diana since I stole this position from her. I must fulfil my duty. I must support Orpheus, get involved in the management of his fief and mansion, and give birth¡­ to a son. I¡¯ll retire early when I¡¯ve done all this and move to the fief mansion to live quietly. That way, Orpheus and Diana can live happily without being disturbed by anyone this time. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯ll leave the mansion after I¡¯ve fulfilled my duty and live quietly. I¡¯ve been thinking about that for some time now. I can¡¯t think of any other way to repay them for their kindness. And I have no doubt that this is the right thing to do. After being married to the Rosenstein House for half a year, I was busy, but my days were filled with happiness. I was surrounded by kind people, and I spent my days at ease while still worrying that this happiness could collapse someday. But when I thought about it, I was walking on thin ice. If I lose my balance a little, then the ice will suddenly crack, and I will fall into the cold water and sink. However, the scenery I saw for the first time was too gorgeous, and I fell in love with it, so I didn¡¯t ponder about the dangerous place I was in. I was a fool. However, I couldn¡¯t do anything about it once I was on the ice. It happened on the day when I went to Charmes Mondt on Otto Street with Orpheus to buy jewellery. I bought Claire a garnet hair ornament, Diana a perfume that smelled like southern fruits, and went back to the mansion. ¡°Claire, I have a present for you,¡± I told her when I got back to my room from my outing, and Claire widened her amber eyes as if they were going to tear up. I picked up a small, striped, gold and white box from today¡¯s purchases and gave it to Claire, which surprised her. ¡°Open it.¡± Claire timidly received the box. She gently opened it while feeling tense and unwrapped the silk cloth. ¡°Woah! Madam, this¡­!¡± Claire raised her voice while looking like she couldn¡¯t believe it. Wrapped in silk was a silver hair ornament with small flowers and a thin rose-coloured garnet inlaid in the middle. I chose this because I thought it would look good in her red hair. ¡°Thank you for always working so hard. I¡¯m really grateful to you. This is just my thanks,¡± I said as emotion filled my chest and tears felt as if they were going to fall out. I couldn¡¯t repay how well she treated me with just one hair ornament. I was able to be here because of her encouragement and support. I really am grateful to her. ¡°N-no way. I, I only did what was expected of me¡­ Th-there¡¯s no way I can accept something so expensive! I¡¯m thrilled by your feelings, so mm, erm¡­¡± Claire was busy going pale and turning red. I took her hand and gently pushed the box into it. ¡°I have permission from Orpheus. So, it¡¯s fine. Please, Claire. Please take it. Think of it as a sign of my trust.¡± Claire muttered, while being dumbfounded, ¡°Madam.¡± Her face scrunched up, and she began crying. ¡°What¡¯s wrong, Claire?! Are you feeling unwell?!¡± ¡°N-no. I¡¯m okay. I¡¯m crying because Madam is so kind¡­¡± Claire said in a tearful voice as she sniffed slowly when I quickly held out a handkerchief. ¡°I¡¯m the one who should be thanking you. Thank you very much, Madam. You¡¯re always very, very nice to me. You buy me presents whenever you go out, and you care about my family.¡± ¡°Claire.¡± I wiped Claire¡¯s tears and sighed emotionally. What a good child she is! I hadn¡¯t done anything special, and yet she thought that way. Are there any other girls who are as pure and kind-hearted as she? I nearly cried because she was crying, and Claire wiped her face roughly with her sleeves and declared powerfully, ¡°I¡¯ll serve Madam for the rest of my life!¡± ¡°Th-the rest of your life?¡± Claire is old enough to get married in a few years. I¡¯m happy, but it¡¯ll be bad for her to serve me for the rest of her life. I want her to find a nice man, marry him and serve him instead of me. I told her this, but it was hard for me to get her to change her mind once it¡¯s been made, and she got even more fired up, ¡°I¡¯ll follow you no matter what happens!¡± She even said that she would make the hair ornament an heirloom, so I warned her not to. It was an uproar. I changed into casual clothes and visited Diana¡¯s room to give her the perfume. I could have given her jewellery like I had with Claire, but I¡¯ve already done that a few times already and she can¡¯t enjoy the beauty of jewellery in the first place. So, I chose perfume because I thought she could enjoy it with her other senses. Of course, I also got Orpheus¡¯s permission for this. I wanted to see Diana¡¯s happy face, so I knocked on the door of her room as my chest pounded, but there was no answer even after I waited for a bit. I tilted my head, wondering where she¡¯d gone, and a cold voice sounded from behind me, ¡°What are you doing here?¡± I turned around and saw the head maid, Elze, standing there with a stern look on her face. She glanced at the tiny box in my hand, frowned and questioned me again, ¡°What are you doing, Ms Ophelia?¡± ¡°¡­ I wanted to give Diana a gift. She doesn¡¯t seem to be in her room, so I wondered where she¡¯d gone.¡± I, who disliked Elze¡¯s evaluating glance, answered while doing my best not to meet her eyes. Elze sighed as if she was stunned and shook her head as if she was rejecting my remark. ¡°Miss Diana is in the garden.¡± ¡°The garden?¡± I asked back since I thought it was odd. Why was she in the garden when the sun was about to set? It was spring according to the calendar, but it was still cold in the morning and evening. It wasn¡¯t time to enjoy a walk at night. But, Elze probably wouldn¡¯t answer me even if I asked her about this. She only told me the necessary minimum. ¡°I see. If that¡¯s the case, then fine. Thank you for telling me.¡± I left because there was no point in me being here, and she stopped me after I took a few steps. I turned back wondering what she wanted, and Elze raised her chin and said like a strict teacher who was scolding a child who had done something wrong, ¡°You should understand your position calmly and take appropriate actions.¡± I felt fed up when I heard that. Elze always says this to me every time we meet. I wanted to argue¡­ Are you telling me that I did something unnecessary and that I behaved in a way that makes it seem like I don¡¯t understand my own position? She knew that Orpheus trusted her greatly. She had training and a title and took an unbelievable attitude against her master¡¯s wife. She probably didn¡¯t like my presence because she seems to be one of Diana¡¯s ardent supporters. ¡°I¡¯ll endeavour to do so,¡± I could only reply like this because I didn¡¯t want to trouble Orpheus by causing discord with the servants. Elze still stared at me as if she wanted to say something, but I didn¡¯t want to feel any more uncomfortable, so I held the box as if protecting myself from her gaze and quickly walked away. I thought about various things as I walked: about Orpheus, about Diana, about myself, about the past and about the future. I couldn¡¯t stop thinking. I got more and more depressed, and by the time I had realised, I was in the garden. The sky was dyed red with the sunset. It was dim around the vicinity, and a piercing cold wind was blowing. I got cold in no time because of my thin clothes, but I didn¡¯t feel like going back to the mansion and loitered around the garden at dusk. I was going to give Diana the box if I met her. I wanted to see her bright smile, which was like a blooming flower. If I see her smile, my heart which was as cold as my body would become warm as if I was in the sun. Then, I saw it. The sight of Orpheus smiling gently and lovingly at Diana like I¡¯ve never seen before¨D¨D¨D. It was an expression that he had never turned towards me. Orpheus always looked at me with a slight smile on his face and a somewhat cold and evaluating gaze. There was no trace of affection in his look, but I wasn¡¯t unhappy since I knew who his love was directed at. But I fell in love with it. I fell in love with that look immediately. It was funny that I fell in love with the way my husband smiled at his lover. I was delighted and despaired. Even if I love Orpheus, he wouldn¡¯t love me. I was a hindrance for both of them. Orpheus loves Diana so much, but he can¡¯t get married to her because of me. The cold truth was over there, and it pierced my heart sharper than a dagger. I covered my ears and ran into the darkness. I didn¡¯t want to hear their laughter anymore. My breathing went up, and I kept running even when my chest started hurting. I wanted to disappear far away from them and if I could, I wanted my soul to disappear from the world. Chapter 13 - And, So I… Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles I was walking on thin ice every day. I was happy and fascinated by the scenes around me, but I finally saw the cracks. If the ice breaks, then all I can do is fall. I was probably a fool in many ways. From that day on, I continued to worry. I couldn¡¯t live as I have been doing now. Orpheus and I were doing well because we didn¡¯t have any romantic feelings towards each other. Diana¡¯s presence hadn¡¯t been a problem either. But once that balance was broken¨D¨D¨D and I had stepped onto the ice, it won¡¯t go well anymore. No one else was to blame; I was. I fell in love with Orpheus despite knowing that Orpheus and Diana loved each other. I was foolish and had strangled myself. I was worried. I suffered while crying, endured the pain in my chest and came to a conclusion. ¨D¨D¨D I will disappear from their sight. I love both Orpheus and Diana. The love I feel for them both are different, but I love them from the bottom of my heart. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯ll step down. I¡¯ll disappear from the sight of my loved ones. May they be married this time for their happiness. However, if I just disappear from their sight, then they would be worried because they are kind. Orpheus would be worried, and he would probably try to find me. Thus, I became a wicked person and will disappear from their sights once they hate me. I will be cast away by Orpheus. That man would probably fly into a fit of rage if I disappear while only leaving a scandal behind, but that didn¡¯t matter anymore. I have no obligations to a man who sold me off to gain loans after he¡¯d oppressed me harshly. And it doesn¡¯t matter what happens to me. I had no worth, to begin with, and I¡¯m not needed by anyone. I¡¯ll become a nun or a prostitute. I¡¯ll become anything. ¨D¨D¨D If it¡¯s for Orpheus, if it¡¯s for the person I love, then I can do anything. I don¡¯t mind if people look down on me. I also don¡¯t care if they reject me. I¡¯m not looking for someone to understand. This is ¨D¨D¨D this is my love. This is my love for Orpheus. And I became the Countess Rosenstein whom everyone hates. I insulted Orpheus when he tried to talk to me and ignored Diana who kept repeating her excuses. Orpheus said he would move Diana to another place, and I would ask him why every time. ¡°You¡¯re the one who wanted to keep her here, so why are you trying to get rid of her now?¡± I would say. ¡ºI don¡¯t care.¡» By then, I had met Claude and had his cooperation, so I said, ¡°I¡¯ve found someone I like. So, I don¡¯t care about you anymore. Do whatever you want.¡± ¡ºYou¡¯re the only one who can¡¯t abandon me.¡» ¡ºI¡¯m not abandoning you.¡» I tore up the promise that I had made to Orpheus many times as if I was tearing up a thin piece of paper. ¡°Why, Ophelia?¡± Orpheus muttered, while standing there with a badly wounded expression on his face. I ignored the pain in my chest that felt like it was being pierced by countless needles, laughed and said, ¡°It¡¯s because I hate you, Orpheus. I hate you and I hate Diana.¡± Thus, the curtains closed on my happy days, and I was only allowed to push forward to the end. Everything was in the past and will never come back. ??????? I sat down at dinner after I shook Orpheus awake. The sun had already set, the curtains closed, and the only light source in the room came from the chandelier and candlestick. A heavy silence flowed between us. Orpheus quietly drank his wine, and I earnestly carried the food in front of me to my mouth. An aura of rejection flowed out from Orpheus¡¯s whole body and was carried in the silence. ¡°Ophelia, I need to talk¡­¡± ¡°You¡¯re not going to complain, right?¡± I gulped down the glass of wine in front of me and interrupted Orpheus. ¡°I ate as you ordered. I ate properly. I¡¯m full, so I don¡¯t need dessert.¡± I violently threw the cloth which I had wiped my mouth with on the table and stood up. ¡°Wait. I need to talk to you. Sit down.¡± ¡°I refuse. I have nothing to talk to you about. You lectured me a lot yesterday, and I¡¯m sick of hearing your voice since it sounds as if you¡¯re looking down on me. Ah, oh, yes, yes. Don¡¯t send Juris as a messenger again. I don¡¯t like that man. I don¡¯t want to see his face if possible.¡± ¡°It¡¯s not a lecture. Just sit down.¡± ¡°You¡¯re persistent! I told you I don¡¯t want to, didn¡¯t I?!¡± I threw a tantrum like always. ¡°I have nothing to talk to you about, and I don¡¯t want to listen to you! What? What complaints do you have?! I promised that I wouldn¡¯t waste money for a while, and I didn¡¯t disturb your time with Diana!¡± ¡°Ophelia.¡± ¡°Shut up! You¡¯re always like this! You¡¯re kind to Diana, but you always complain about me! Why can¡¯t you be a little kind to me!?¡± Orpheus remained expressionless. He looked at me coldly, and I couldn¡¯t understand what he was thinking. He stared at me, who was shouting because I had gotten worked up. He won¡¯t gently appease me like he does with Diana when she gets angry. He would never direct his loving smile and natural arched lips at me. ¨D¨D¨D But I still love him. I became a loathsome person because I love him. I was selfish and arrogant. I became a bad wife who people frowned at just by hearing my name. I degraded into a fool. If I do this, then the relationship between Orpheus and Diana is justified, and the servants becoming would support her even more. Before long, Orpheus will run out of patience with me, divorce me, and I will disappear from their sight. And Orpheus and Diana, the lovers I admire, will marry and be happy. Orpheus can smile gently and lovingly forever by Diana¡¯s side. ¨D¨D¨D So, I will give him my everything. It¡¯s okay if my feelings don¡¯t reach him. It¡¯s okay if it remains unknown forever. It¡¯s okay even if I¡¯m looked down upon and rejected. ¡°I hate you all! You, Diana, Juris and Elze. I hate you all!¡± I didn¡¯t want to see Orpheus¡¯s face distort as if it was cracked and rushed out of the dining room as my bloody scream echoed. Countess Rosenstein is selfish, domineering and a spendthrift. She also loved gambling and went to gambling houses whenever she found free time. It is rumoured that she is a regular at the famous gambling house on the outskirts of the capital. She stays there from day time and drinks wine like water. She flaunts her good fortune for marrying a rich and handsome husband and takes bets from wealthy nobles who have spare time. ¡®Gambling¡¯ was a way for nobles who have too much spare time and money to kill time. However, it is disgraceful and vulgar for a young lady to be absorbed in gambling when it hasn¡¯t even been that long since she¡¯d gotten married, and she hasn¡¯t even given birth. It was normal for society to frown at her. Moreover, the madam¡¯s notoriety doesn¡¯t stop there. Social behaviour, self-indulgent in her private life, and lovers with a painter. Although she is a country noble, she is the former daughter of a Marquis House, and while everyone praised her husband for being wonderful, she continued to act foolish without reflecting. These days, people in high society all seem to say this. ¡ºIt won¡¯t be long until Countess Rosenstein is expelled from high society.¡» ¨D¨D¨D Will I be expelled from high society first? Or divorced first? I¡¯d like to be divorced first, but that might be difficult considering the number of unfriendly glances that are thrown my way whenever I go to the gambling house. The nobles, who are seated with me, look at me with smiles on their faces, but they were probably scoffing at me inside. She has more pride than others and is a foolish woman, they probably thought. No, they might be cussing me inside; I¡¯ve lost all my money to that damn woman. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m tired. Let¡¯s stop. Thinking it was the right time, I raked up the coins in my hand, handed it to Renee, who was standing behind me and stood up. ¡°Oh, are you already leaving Countess Rosenstein?¡± ¡°Well, are you quitting while you¡¯re ahead? That¡¯s sly, Ms Ophelia. Play with us for just a little longer.¡± I showed the nobles, who were trying to detain me, an arrogant smile suitable for a winner. ¡°I¡¯ll hold back. I won¡¯t necessarily receive the Goddess of Victory¡¯s smile so many times. Goodbye, everyone.¡± I curtsied at the nobles, who were smiling wryly, and left the table. I ordered Renee to exchange the coins and headed to the rest area at the corner of the room. I wanted to rest slowly in a place with few people, but I was caught by nobles I knew and by the time I was seated on the leather-covered seats, I didn¡¯t have the will to stand up. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m really exhausted. I sighed heavily, opened the fan and was briefly fascinated by the painting of the large bundle of roses. ¨D¨D¨D Orpheus. I thought deep crimson roses resembled that handsome person. I continued to play the foolish Countess Rosenstein. I said more selfish things, I became hysterical in some ways, I played around with my lover and continued to waste money, breaking my promise of not wasting it. Then, I started going to the gambling house, which I had neglected for about half a month. I also started gambling to ruin my reputation, and also because the wealthy wife, who I was modelling my act of being the worst type of woman ever, is addicted to gambling. She did nothing but gamble and even fell into debt. Of course, I didn¡¯t dare to imitate her until that happened to me, but I started going to the gambling house because my reputation would drop a lot since I was a young wife. Gambling also has its advantages. If I¡¯m lucky, I can make money. The money I earned was invested in the business of a merchant I knew, and I¡¯ve made quite a profit from it now. I kept my savings in the bank without touching it, and I was planning on withdrawing it all once the divorce has been decided, then I¡¯ll sell off all the dresses and jewellery that I have, add that amount to my savings, and give it all to Orpheus. Alimony, no, it¡¯s more appropriate to say that this is the fee for the nuisance I¡¯ve caused. I¡¯m sorry that the money isn¡¯t very clean in the first place, but I have no other way to earn money. The room inside the gambling place was laid out luxuriously like a high-class salon and was filled with fashionable men and women of all ages, even today. It was filled with hot air and was stuffy. I want to bask in the outside wind, but I had to wait for Renee to return, so I could only endure it with the light breeze coming from my fan. I stared blankly at the scene which unfolded before my eyes as I waited for Renee. The nobles who were laughing boisterously and having fun gambling were of various ages and positions. On the heavy tables were cards, dice, roulettes, wine glasses and stacks of coloured coins ¨D¨D¨D which would become a hefty amount if one were to cash it out. Gambling is a pastime for nobles. Most of the nobles, who live in the capital, have a lot of time and money, and they didn¡¯t go to gambling houses just to seek thrills, but also to socialise. Gambling houses weren¡¯t only a place to spend money, but also a place for nobles to interact with each other. Some gambling houses are so prestigious that only selected nobles are allowed to enter. ¨D¨D¨D Elegant. I thought as I watched them shout. All the nobles come here to enjoy gambling and chatting. The whereabouts of large amounts of money, mansions, land or fiefs given by the King are sometimes decided with a small roll of a die. Even losing is a pleasure for them. I can¡¯t understand their mental states, no matter how much time passes. I don¡¯t think gambling is fun at all because betting makes me break out in a cold sweat. And above all else, it¡¯s tiring. I don¡¯t bet a lot of money considering that I could lose, and the act of wagering money from those who lose it makes me feel guilty and shaves away at my energy and mentally. A noble¡¯s extravagant pastime might not suit someone who has been living like an orphan since a young age. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m really doing stupid things. I¡¯m beyond saving because I¡¯m doing a lot of foolish things to break up with the person I love. Instead of relying on Claude when I get divorced, it would be better if I become a nun and spend my days repenting to god. Though, I don¡¯t think that all my past actions will be forgiven even if I do this ¨D¨D¨D. Chapter 14 - An Idea Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles Countess Rosenstein¡¯s reputation in social circles isn¡¯t good. However, an unexpectedly large number of nobles talk to me. They want to get to know Orpheus through me. Even now, I was surrounded by three nobles. One is a young man, and the other two are young ladies. From what I¡¯ve heard, all three aren¡¯t married yet. They talked about the same thing as everyone else: Orpheus. ¡ºI¡¯m jealous that you could get married to such a wonderful person.¡»Most of the people who speak to me say this. With irony, he¡¯s too good for a woman like you. ¡°The women who admire him don¡¯t mind being temporary partners, so have mercy.¡± ¡°My friends say that too. She is so attracted to Count Rosenstein, her face turns red, and she bursts into tears just by glancing at him.¡± ¡°Oh my, isn¡¯t that you?¡± ¡°No way, I¡¯m different. Although I am attracted to him¡­¡± Both the young ladies are gorgeous. They are lively and sparkling. One of them had bright golden hair and resembled Diana somehow. ¡°But he¡¯s as popular as always. I can¡¯t believe a prideful lady would say that she wouldn¡¯t mind being his plaything. Madam, aren¡¯t you proud?¡± The young man, who was listening to the young ladies talk while smiling, interjected, and I replied with a vague smile. As always, they continue talking even if I don¡¯t say anything. They ramble on about how excellent and popular Orpheus is. However, I know how wonderful that person is even without having to be told by others. Because I¡¯m by his side. ¡°Come to think of it, I heard that he took in a blind relative and they¡¯re living together.¡± ¡°I heard about that too. Earl Rosenstein is very kind, isn¡¯t he? I envy the young lady. What kind of person is she?¡± ¡°I¡¯m sure she¡¯s a beautiful lady since she¡¯s related to that handsome man, right? ¡­ Well, not as much as you, though.¡± They also bring up Diana a lot. People who are suspicious about the relationship between Diana and Orpheus, are particularly interested in knowing what kind of person she is since she doesn¡¯t appear in social circles. They look at my reaction to make sure. ¡°She¡¯s a gorgeous person. I¡¯m no match for her.¡±¡¯ I return an unwavering smile at their rude stares. I¡¯m not lying. Diana is beautiful. She has a radiance that eminates out from within. But they don¡¯t agree. ¡°What¡¯s her hair colour? Eye colour?¡± ¡°How is she compared to the Princess?¡± ¡°Her personality?¡± I couldn¡¯t help but give a small sigh behind my fan. My fatigue came back even though I was taking a break. My reputation is terrible in social circles, but there are still people who talk to me. Not because they¡¯re interested in me, but because they are interested in Orpheus. I could probably answer their questions with a heartfelt smile if we were an average couple and our relationship hadn¡¯t broken down. I would possibly boast about Orpheus more than them. My beloved husband is wonderful, and Diana is a good friend, I would say. ¨D¨D¨D Also, if there was no irony or jealousy. Renee had already returned and was standing behind me. I got bored of what they were saying because it didn¡¯t seem like they were going to change the topic, and was about to leave, when the young man said something that bothered me to the women who were praising Orpheus, ¡°Come to think of it, this is something I heard from my friend, but Lord Rosenstein doesn¡¯t like people who fall in love with his good looks. He gets uncomfortable when people approach him amorously. I guess that just shows how many women try to approach him. I¡¯m extremely jealous of him, but I guess people struggle in their own way when they¡¯re better than others.¡± I, who was about to get off my seat, froze just like that. This is the first I¡¯ve heard of this. Orpheus is a gentleman, and he¡¯s kind to women. I¡¯ve seen many women approach him, but he gently refuses them all without looking disgusted or hurting anyone. I¡¯ve never heard or seen the kind of reaction that this man mentioned, and I¡¯ve never heard about this before, and I can¡¯t imagine it from the way Orpheus behaves typically. I couldn¡¯t believe it, and the women looked surprised as if this was the first time they¡¯ve heard of this. They covered their mouths and criticised the man with their eyes. ¡°Well, did the person himself say it? That person? It¡¯s a lie.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t believe it. Because isn¡¯t he a kind, caring and a wonderful gentleman to everyone? Right, Countess Rosenstein?¡± ¡°¡­ Right.¡± See? The man, who was being glared at, shrugged and laughed in a troubled way, ¡°You may not believe this, but my friend heard this from Lord Rosenstein himself. Most women change just by seeing him, and he¡¯s sick of it. I mean, doesn¡¯t he like that candid woman? I think it¡¯s alright to be a little cold.¡± I thought quietly as I glanced back at the three talkative people. I can¡¯t say for sure whether Orpheus hates women who approach him because I¡¯ve never seen this before. After all, he¡¯s the type of person who is kind to a woman who he had married because of someone¡¯s last request. However, there¡¯s a chance that he feels unhappy inside even if he doesn¡¯t let it show on his face. However, that wasn¡¯t what worried me. ¨D¨D¨D What would Orpheus think if I approached him like this? The wife, who has disliked her husband until now, suddenly starts flirting and snuggles up to him. He might think at first, maybe she¡¯s reflected on her actions and want to start over, but then, I¡¯ll act the same as before and remain a bad wife. A normal person would get annoyed and wonder what I¡¯m up to. The relationship would deteriorate further. All the more so if Orpheus hated women who flirt with him. Still, the wife doesn¡¯t stop persisting, and even Diana gets jealous¡­ ¡°This is an interesting conversation.¡± They stopped talking and concentrated their glances on me. The man stiffened a little. Maybe he thought he had put me in a bad mood. ¡°Mm, Countess Rosenstein¡­¡± I didn¡¯t answer him and covered my mouth with my half-opened fan. ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s not about pulling back all the time, sometimes I should push once in a while. I acted in a lot of loathsome ways, but Orpheus was still putting up with me. It might be only a matter of time, but I couldn¡¯t take things slowly because I wanted to be divorced as soon as possible. ¨D¨D¨DIt¡¯s worth a try. If I fail, then I just have to think of another way. It takes time to build trust, but it only takes a moment to break it. ¡°Thanks for letting me hear such an interesting conversation, Viscount Heidfeld. Please tell your father hello for me. Well, have a nice day, everyone.¡± I got away from the three silent people and quickly left the gambling house. ¡°So, I think I¡¯m going to change the way I do things a little bit,¡± I said, and Claude, who was sitting directly opposite me, and Claire, who was standing next to me, didn¡¯t say anything and looked mixed. I was once again at Claude¡¯s apartment. Today is the day I promised to meet him, and this time I brought Claire with me instead of Renee, and the three of us chatted while practising embroidery around the table. Claude was the one who was teaching Claire and I how to embroider. He is really skilful with his hands and is really good at embroidering even though he is male. ¡°I think it¡¯s a great idea, but is there a problem?¡± I stopped embroidering and asked, and the two people still looked mixed as they stayed silent. A little while later, Claude opened his mouth a little hesitantly, ¡°Well, in the current situation, he will get iffy about it.¡± ¡°Right? What do you think, Claire?¡± ¡°I¡­¡± Claire also stopped embroidering, and for some reason, she looked at Claude a few times for help. Claude turned away as if he was avoiding her, and Claire stared at her hand. ¡°I-I think Master will be shocked. I don¡¯t know if it would make your relationship worse.¡± ¡°Even if it doesn¡¯t get worse, he would be iffy about it. ¡ºWhat are you doing now?¡»I can picture him saying that in a cold voice.¡± ¡°I wonder about that. He might be surprisingly happy to accept it. He might think that you¡¯ve finally come to your senses,¡± Claude answered instead of Claire. He crossed his hands behind his head, leaned back and crossed his legs. ¡°No way. I mean, nothing else will change, right? I¡¯ll still go out like always, waste money, gamble and go to meet my lover, you know? He won¡¯t say that I¡¯ve come to my senses now, will he? He¡¯ll definitely get angry. He¡¯ll yell, what¡¯re you scheming?¡± I said as if convincing myself. I told them about the idea that I had come up with when I heard about those things at the gambling house, but I didn¡¯t think they would react like this and became a little uneasy. ¡°And my relationship with him is horrible beyond repair. If this method fails, then it wouldn¡¯t be a big deal. He would be compelled to reject me in front of Diana, right?¡± ¡°He might think that you guys can talk and try to persuade you? He might think that you went back to how you used to be. He doesn¡¯t just worry about Diana; he also cares about you too.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t think so. Because I¡¯ve said it clearly¡­ This is the real me. I¡¯ve been playing a good girl all my life.¡± Chapter 15 - Screwed Up Embroidery Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles Orpheus tried to talk with me many times when I first became the bad wife, Countess Rosenstein. He persistently asked: why are you behaving like this? Are you unsatisfied with something? However, I either ignored him or replied with this. ¡ºUnfortunately, this is who I really am. The obedient and meek Ophelia is a lie. It was absurd to keep on acting.¡» Orpheus still tried to talk to me, but eventually, he only cautioned me not to waste money and stay out overnight without notice. He didn¡¯t want to fix our relationship anymore. Even if we pass each other in the corridor now, he only glances at me coldly, and we barely talk. He might have given up because he just gets ignored when he tries to talk to me. ¡°Phelia, how do I say this, you¡¯re like that. Once you¡¯ve made up your mind, you¡¯re relentless. I can¡¯t believe you said that to your husband.¡± ¡°I¡¯m aware that I¡¯ve said something horrible. But if I don¡¯t go that far, then he won¡¯t let me go. That¡¯s how important that last request is to him.¡± ¡°Last request? The last request of the previous head¡­?¡± Claire said, and I nodded. ¡°His last request was to marry the daughter of his beloved prostitute. He respects the former head, his father, a lot, and takes his last request seriously. So much so that he would betray his lover, Diana, to fulfil this request. He still won¡¯t divorce me even though I¡¯m doing whatever I want; probably because of that request and what little sympathy he has for me. He might be preparing for the divorce secretly, though.¡± ¡°Well, even if he was following that last request¡­¡± Claude shrugged and said. ¡°If that¡¯s the case, then he should have kicked Diana out before he married you. He may have asked you about this before, but if you¡¯re told that the girl is blind, then you would usually say, ¡ºThen, please let her stay¡». Especially if they had your personality, Phelia. Lord Rosenstein should have settled the matter before getting married. He¡¯s breaking the rules. Keeping his lover by his side since the beginning of the marriage; of course, Phelia would become a bad wife. He doesn¡¯t complain about you having a lover either.¡± Before I knew it, Claude quoted the rumours that were floating around ladies at the theatre. I looked sour and defended myself, ¡°I¡¯m acting like a bad wife on purpose.¡± ¡°But he¡¯s said it many times before. He¡¯ll move Diana somewhere else because I¡¯m acting ridiculous.¡± ¡°He didn¡¯t move her, though, did he?¡± ¡°I told him that he didn¡¯t have to. I told him that I have you, Claude, so I¡¯ll do what I want, and he can do what he wants. And there¡¯s no point to this if Diana leaves. I have to get them together somehow. I want Diana to stay in Rosenstein mansion.¡± ¡°I¡¯ve heard this many times before, Phelia. Don¡¯t you think that Lord Rosenstein is a terrible man?¡± ¡°He¡¯s¡­¡± I looked down. As Claude said, Orpheus may be a cruel man. He kept his lover by his side, and showed me, his wife, how close they were and how much they love each other. In fact, he may be a horrendous man. ¨D¨D¨D But still, he saved me. He saved me from the days of being treated like a servant and being oppressed. He may have only done that to fulfil his foster father¡¯s last request, but to me, it was salvation. Thanking him many times and devoting my remaining life to him isn¡¯t enough to compensate him. Most importantly, he taught me the joy of loving someone. Loving him has been mostly painful, but the little joy and happiness I felt can¡¯t be replaced with anything. That¡¯s why I¡­ ¡°I don¡¯t think he is. He¡¯s everything to me.¡± Claude scratched his bed hair and sighed, ¡°Dear me!¡± ¡°Doing this much for your love rival. Phelia, you¡¯re like a saint¡­ Don¡¯t you think so Claire?¡± Claire was looking down. I thought she was concentrating on her embroidery, but her hands, which were holding the cloth, were trembling a little. ¡°Wh-what¡¯s wrong?¡± When I looked at her face, her pretty face was scrunched up, and her eyes were red. Large tears filled her amber eyes, and they were going to fall if she moved even a little. ¡°Madam¡­ Madam, you¡¯re too kind. Despite never becoming happy, being hated by everyone, and shunned. Despite¡­ You love the Master so much!¡± ¡°Eh, mmm, yes! Here a handkerchief. Use it!¡± ¡°Uoah, thank you very much.¡± Claire pushed the handkerchief that I had given her to her face and began blowing her nose. I patted her trembling back, and Claude said while smiling wryly, ¡°Claire cries a lot. She¡¯s moved by your determination. Phelia¡¯s heartfelt feelings certainly can¡¯t be heard without tears.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t tease me,¡± I growled. What is there to cry about with this comical love? Playing a hateful person for the person I love, have the person I love marry who he loves, and exit quietly while being hated. This silly story doesn¡¯t even make a crap play. ¡°And it¡¯s not wholeheartedly. Because I¡¯m in a lovers relationship with you.¡± ¡°Pretend lovers, right? It¡¯s actually different. We¡¯ve never hugged or held hands. We¡¯re just friends.¡± ¡°Not just friends, you¡¯re an important friend.¡± ¡°My bad, that¡¯s right. I¡¯m going to say this, so you don¡¯t misunderstand, but I feel the same way. That¡¯s why I¡¯m supporting you. I can¡¯t give you much advice, but I think it¡¯s fine for you to try new methods.¡± I placed the embroidery cloth onto the table and stared at Claude¡¯s deep green eyes. ¡°Why can¡¯t you give me advice?¡± ¡°Because I don¡¯t know how Lord Rosenstein would react. He might reject you, like you believe, or he might accept it.¡± ¡°He might accept it¡­?¡± I thought about that possibility again. However, I couldn¡¯t think of any way that would be possible no matter how much I puzzled over it. ¡°I can¡¯t believe that would happen.¡± ¡°You don¡¯t know. He might do so to follow that request. He might put up with your selfishness to a certain degree to avoid divorce.¡± ¡°Then, I¡¯ll become a woman so terrible that he won¡¯t be able to put up with me. It¡¯s fine, I¡¯m confident. Even if his heart is shaken, he will reject me in the end. He only has that much patience. And I should¡­¡± I stopped mid-sentence because I remembered unpleasant feelings. ¡°You should?¡± Claire, who had stopped crying, asked in a strange nasally voice, but I shook my head, ¡°It¡¯s nothing.¡± Claude stared at me, but I shook my head again. ¡°Anyway, I¡¯ll try it. If it doesn¡¯t work, then it doesn¡¯t. I¡¯ll think of another way.¡± I declared, and Claude sipped his cold tea and shrugged. ¡°Don¡¯t do anything complicated, I think the quickest way is to say, ¡®Please break up with me,¡¯ at the beginning.¡± ¡°I¡¯ve tried that many times¡­ but it¡¯s meaningless. I have to get him to divorce me.¡± ¡°If so, then why don¡¯t you run away and hide your whereabouts? I¡¯ll help you.¡± ¡°I thought of that for emergencies¡­ but, I want to get a formal divorce if possible. So that Orpheus and Diana don¡¯t have to worry in the future. And if they¡¯re going to get married in the future, then I want us to divorce properly.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know if acting bold is good or not. I don¡¯t know how you think sometimes. But well, you seem very confident with this new method, so why don¡¯t you do what you want for the time being until you¡¯re satisfied? Both Claire and I will support you and help out if anything happens. That will never change¡­ Right, Claire?¡± ¡°Yes. I¡¯ll always be on your side no matter what.¡± ¡°Claire.¡± ¨D¨D¨D What a good girl she is. Claire, this child has always been like this. She¡¯s been on my side ever since I got married. The other servants shunned me, but Claire is different. She serves me with all her might. She really is a kind and good girl. When I wanted to tell her thanks, Claude interrupted, ¡°By the way¡­¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°How is your embroidery progressing? What does it look like now?¡± He¡¯s hinting something. I held the embroidered cloth that I had thrown on the table. To be honest, I¡¯m very clumsy with my hands, so I¡¯m pretty bad at embroidery. I can¡¯t compare to the skilful Claire. The embroidery I¡¯m working on this time is a large rose surrounded by green vines. I¡¯ve finished about a third of it, but I¡¯ve already wrecked the rose, and it has become something unrecognisable. Claude glanced at it and twitched. ¡°Ah,¡± he said in disappointment. Claire hung her head down as if she hadn¡¯t seen anything and resumed her embroidery. ¡°Hm. It looks fine since it¡¯s really unique. Or should I say, it¡¯s just like you.¡± ¡°You don¡¯t have to force yourself to praise it.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Even if I can¡¯t embroider, I have to at least learn how to sew a button on. Whether Claude hires me, or I chose a different path, it would be meaningless if I can¡¯t do things on my own. I took back my embroidery cloth and wholeheartedly manipulated the needle to try and make a decent piece. Chapter 16 - Lord Lagerfeld Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles That night, I thought about the future while staring at the pitch-black ceiling. ¨D¨D¨D Even if I¡¯m going to flirt with him, how do I go about doing it¡­? At times like this, not having any love experience backfires. I don¡¯t understand how women flirt with men who can charm both women and children. The first thing that comes to mind is lure him into a hidden corner and push him down, but rather than being overkill, it¡¯s too difficult. He might hit me if I make the wrong move, and I don¡¯t think that Orpheus would follow me into a place hidden from view in the first place. ¨D¨D¨D How about I be moderate at first and invite him on a walk? It wasn¡¯t because it was embarrassing to suddenly take bold actions or because I didn¡¯t have the courage. In my case, just inviting him on a walk should be revolting. I have never invited Orpheus to anything. Even at the time when we¡¯d just married, and our relationship was good. I was trying on my own to become the ideal wife of a distinguished family until we got to this situation. I didn¡¯t say selfish things, I didn¡¯t act domineering, I didn¡¯t waste money nor gamble. I desperately tried to accomplish the tasks I had been given behind closed doors and spend my days quietly. I wanted to be an ideal wife because I strongly wanted Orpheus to recognise me. I thought it was inappropriate of a wife to demand something from her husband, to burden him because of that, to take his precious time and spoil his mood. So, I devoted myself to being unselfish. Now I¡¯m always burdening him. He has to waste his time reprimanding me and solving the problems I¡¯d caused. I continue to spoil his mood. All my efforts have come to nothing¡­ Apart from that, I¡¯m sure the calm Orpheus would be anxious or confused if his wife, who has been acting nasty for the past half a year suddenly started acting in a baffling way. ¨D¨D¨D Anyway, first is a walk. Then, I¡¯ll see his reaction, and if it looks like things are going well, then I¡¯ll invite him to tea. Then, I¡¯ll increase the time we spend together and gradually stick to him. Of course, I¡¯ll continue to play the selfish, arrogant, and foolish Countess Rosenstein during this time. Orpheus would probably grow distrustful of me and get irritated at me. What¡¯s more, if I go crazy from jealousy and hurt his precious Diana, ¨D¨D¨D of course, not physically, but mentally, ¨D¨D¨D then he might divorce me on the same day. I feel bad for the lovers who have to suffer, but they should think of this as a test to strengthen their bonds. Trials are a part of love. After everything is over, they¡¯ll have a honeymoon where no one will interrupt them. I closed my eyes when I finished thinking. I felt as if my body was sinking, and I lost consciousness straight away. For about a week after that, Orpheus was hardly home because he had to deal with a problem that had occurred at the fief and was mostly at the royal palace. I couldn¡¯t try out my new method, so I went out like usual, went to evening parties and tea parties, watched plays, went shopping on Otto Street, and spent my days as Countess Rosenstein. That day, it was cloudy since morning, and it looked like it could start raining at any moment, so I refrained from going out and quietly spent time in my room in the Rosenstein mansion. The only things I can do inside is embroider or read a book. I didn¡¯t feel like embroidering, so I borrowed some books from the library. I¡¯d dismissed Claire and Renee and spent time quietly in my dimly lit room. Orpheus wasn¡¯t at home since he had stayed at the royal palace since last night. Apparently, there was a problem at the royal palace as well and not just his fief. Three days ago, when I happened to pass him in the corridor, he looked tired. Even at the best times, his face is pale, and I worried that he would collapse like this. If allowed, I would run up to him and say some encouraging things to him, but even if I didn¡¯t do this, his precious Diana would, so I stayed where I was. A single word from her is more effective than a thousand of my words. The tiredness that weighs down his body should be blown away just by looking at her smile, which was like a sunflower. Even if I smile the same way, it wouldn¡¯t be much help. ¨D¨D¨D Ah. A sigh resounded in the silent room. Looking out the window, it seemed to have stopped raining, but the sky was covered with heavy clouds, and it looked like it was only a matter of time before it started raining again. I turned my gaze back to the book and read. I turned the pages while feeling as if time was flowing slowly. I¡¯m reading a famous classic comedy, and it was an excellent book for getting rid of my depressed feelings. I read the book and admired the exquisite wording of the sentences and smiled at the strange behaviour of the characters. I heard a knock at the door when I turned over a new page and smelled the old paper and ink. ¨D¨D¨D I wonder if Claire had thoughtfully made me some tea. I took out the pocket watch from my pocket and saw that it was two o¡¯clock in the afternoon. It¡¯s still too early for tea, I thought as I answered, ¡°Come in.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry for interrupting you while you¡¯re resting,¡± it wasn¡¯t Claire who had appeared while saying that, but the butler, Juris. I blinked several times, then said nastily, ¡°Well, rare things just keep happening right now.¡± I glanced up then looked back at the book. I lifted the corner of my lips. ¡°But this is weird. I¡¯m sure I told Orpheus not to send that messenger again. Did Orpheus not listen to what I said, or are you breaking your master¡¯s order¡­? Well, I don¡¯t even need to say this. It¡¯s the former, isn¡¯t it? You always fulfil his orders. You¡¯re just like a dog.¡± ¡°Marquis Lagerfeld is here,¡± Juris said in a monotone. I stopped turning the page and froze in my position. ¡°¡­ What did you say?¡± ¡°Marquis Lagerfeld is here.¡± I knew that Juris was staring at me, but I couldn¡¯t stop my face from stiffening. My stomach sank as if I swallowed a heavy stone, and the tip of my hands and feet went cold. ¨D¨D¨D So, he¡¯s finally here? I hadn¡¯t heard any news from him since I got married, but I thought it was about time for him to come. It wasn¡¯t odd for him to eventually hear the rumours even though he lived in a rural area away from the capital. He probably couldn¡¯t sit still once he heard of the rumours. He probably didn¡¯t make an appointment and chose a time when Orpheus wouldn¡¯t be home on purpose. ¡°So?¡± My voice trembled. I tried my best to put up a front, but I couldn¡¯t help but be upset. ¡°He wants to meet you, Madam. I refused him by saying that Lord Orpheus is out, but he said he at least wanted to see and talk to you.¡± ¡°Is he in the parlour?¡± ¡°Yes. He¡¯s waiting for you.¡± I slowly got up and looked at my reflection in the dresser. I was in casual clothes. I didn¡¯t have any makeup on, and my hair was simply tied back. That man probably doesn¡¯t care about how I look. It¡¯s a waste of time and effort to get ready now, and I don¡¯t have to get ready for that man. ¡°Okay.¡± I remained expressionless and answered as if I was groaning. He might take me back to the Lagerfeld house after we meet. Not for divorce, but for re-education¡­ If he visited when Orpheus isn¡¯t here, then it¡¯s highly likely, and that man is quite capable of doing something like kidnapping. No matter how much I resist and shout, Claire is the only servant who would help me. But Claire will be stopped by the other servants, and I will end up back at the Lagerfeld house. I would have to endure whips and violence for several months, and it would end if I act obedient and show regret and remorse¡­ ¡°It¡¯s okay,¡± I muttered without letting my voice out. I imagined that person¡¯s beautiful smile. I¡¯m different from that time. I won¡¯t simply do as he wishes. ¡°Tell him that I¡¯ll be there soon.¡± What expression did Juris have on his face at that time? I didn¡¯t know because I was glaring at the gloomy woman in the mirror. He said without emotions, ¡°Understood,¡± and left the room. ¡°Oh, Ophelia. I was tired of waiting.¡± As soon as I entered the room, a stout middle-aged man stood up from one of the chairs that were placed in the middle of the room. ¡°It¡¯s been a long time. Have you been in good health?¡± That voice was as sweet as melted candy, and his expression was of a father who was happy that he was seeing his beloved daughter again, but the glint in his eyes was a death glare. Just imagining how much anger and hatred was swirling inside him¡­ made me break out in a cold sweat. ¨D¨D¨D But I also thought I deserved it. Marquis Lagerfeld. Rudolph Heinz von Lagerfeld. It was the first time I¡¯ve met the father who oppressed me after a year and three months. He¡¯s still a pig dressed in noble clothing. He wore fine clothes over his soft and flabby body and had a ring with a big jewel on his finger. I think he¡¯s gotten fatter since the last time I¡¯ve seen him. Was he cursed with health negligence? I feel like his vibrant blonde hair had faded and was thinner. ¡°It¡¯s been a while, Father. I¡¯m glad you look healthy.¡± I replied in a tone that stated that I didn¡¯t think that at all, and the glint in his eyes grew stronger. It was like he¡¯d passed the point of anger and was going to go crazy. ¨D¨D¨D He won¡¯t let me get away with this. I looked at his expression and had that dangerous thought. I don¡¯t think he¡¯s foolish enough to get violent at his daughter¡¯s husband¡¯s house, but once Juris is gone, and we¡¯re alone, he¡¯ll probably give me an earful. Even if he doesn¡¯t hit or kick me, I¡¯m sure he¡¯ll slap me once. He could say that he was just scolding his stupid daughter if he just does that. ¡°Juris leave the door open,¡± I said to Juris who was about to leave. If he can be heard, then this man won¡¯t utter abuse loudly. However, after he glared at me in disapproval, he changed completely and smiled at Juris. ¡°Honestly, she¡¯s a troubled girl. Do you hate being alone with your father that much? Do you think you¡¯re going to be scolded?¡± ¡°Mas-¡­ Father, that¡¯s¡­¡± ¡°Well, I do have a few things I want to say to you, but I want to talk to you privately. You think so too, right? Ophelia. We don¡¯t have to worry about anyone, like in the old days¡­ So, Mr Heiman. Please close the door.¡± ¨D¨D¨D His outward appearance of acting pleasant hasn¡¯t changed either. I called Juris¡¯s name as my mouth twitched. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m begging you, please don¡¯t close it. Listen to me. However, Juris ignored my pleading glance. He bowed, ¡°Understood,¡± and closed the door as he left. I sighed in gloom. I can¡¯t say that Juris is a traitor. This is probably the thing called karma. The bad wife of his master and a gentleman who acts calm and gentle. Whose order should be followed¡­ In this case, anyone would choose the latter. After all, the gentleman is a gentle father who came all the way from afar just to get a glance at his daughter. It¡¯s only human to want to listen to the father instead of the selfish daughter. It¡¯s inevitable. ¨D¨D¨D Because they don¡¯t know the relationship between this man and me. ¡°I came all this way to see you¡­ honestly, you don¡¯t even show me any courtesy. Victoria is that adorable but compared to her, you¡¯re gloomy¡­ I can see why Lord Rosenstein hates you.¡± I remembered my depressing past. The days where he made me act like a servant and oppressed me. I worked from morning till night, slept in the storage room, and didn¡¯t get enough to eat either. No one stood by the side of the daughter, who he had taken in for revenge, and I endured my pain alone. My heart eventually became paralysed, and the pain dulled. ¡°Well, whatever. There¡¯s nothing to be done if that¡¯s what you wish for¡­ Look up, Ophelia.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Ah, but¡­ Orpheus rescued me. He saved me from the days when I felt like I was crawling on mud, and from the pain, I had to endure. He was kind to me when no one turned back to look at me. He gave me a brief moment of happiness and peace. He taught me love. ¡°I told you to lift your face! This blockhead¡­!¡± He snarled. The man walked towards me with rough footsteps and grabbed me by the collar. He was tall, so he lifted me up, and I was standing on my tiptoes. I finally lifted my face. The man¡¯s face was flushed with anger, and his thick lips trembled as if he had ague. ¡°The disgrace of this fool¡­! How dare you mess around?! What¡¯s with that rumour?!¡± He must have been annoyed that I didn¡¯t follow his order because he quickly flew into a fit of rage. I didn¡¯t want to see the ugly face in front of me, so I pretended to be afraid and closed my eyes. My body was violently shaking back and forth, but I closed my eyes and imagined the beautiful smile of my beloved person like I always did when things were hard. ¡°Don¡¯t you know your place?! You¡¯re smearing mud on the Lagerfeld name, on my name, this trash! Did you forget the debt you owe me for raising you?!¡± ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s okay. There¡¯s nothing to be afraid of. I can do anything. I¡¯ll show him. ¡°If you have an excuse, then tell me!¡± ¡°I don¡¯t have any. Father.¡± I opened my eyes and acted like Countess Rosenstein. I laughed fearlessly as if it was nothing. There¡¯s nothing to be afraid of. Cuss as much as you want and hit me until you¡¯re satisfied. But still, I won¡¯t yield. ¡°What are you complaining about? My marriage is an unhappy one just like you wanted. I¡¯m steadily heading towards my path of ruin. What the hell are you complaining about? You wanted to see me in despair, didn¡¯t you? At this rate, it¡¯ll be soon. Maybe I won¡¯t despair. Maybe I¡¯ll be laughing from the bottom of my heart.¡± ¡°You!¡± He swung his arm, which was like a log, and immediately after, I felt a strong impact on my left cheek. It made the same sound as if I collided into some hard item, my vision spun, and I hit the floor. ¡°Stop fucking around! What¡¯s with that rebellious attitude?! What¡¯s with the way you¡¯re talking?! Who are you talking to!?¡± After the scorching heat, the pain comes a little later. My vision flashed, and my pulse became violent. I¡¯ve been beaten many times when I was with the Lagerfeld family, but I¡¯ve never been hit this strongly before. The man was still shouting, but I was stunned because the impact had been too great. ¡°Are you listening!?¡± The man kicked my shoulder as if he didn¡¯t like my attitude. I was suddenly attacked while I was stunned, so I couldn¡¯t stop him. I toppled over and hit my elbow severely. ¡°Do you know how ungrateful you are?! Who do you have to thank for not becoming an orphan!? Who do you have to thank for living like this?! Who do you have to thank for having a clean body and not having to fall into prostitution?! Answer!¡± I could put up with whatever he said when I was at that house, but it was different now. I heard something snap in my head and I was screaming because of the burning rage. ¡°It would have been better if you died on the roadside!¡± I grabbed the hand that was clutching my chest. If he¡¯s not going to let go, then I won¡¯t go easy on him. I dug my nails into his hand. ¡°If I¡¯m going to live with those thoughts, then it would have been better if I followed after mother! It would have been better if I died! What do you mean who do I have to thank? You treated me like trash and sold me off in the end!¡± ¡°What!? You¡­!¡± ¡°I¡¯m not your property! I¡¯m also not your slave! But still, I endured it for six years and served you! I didn¡¯t rebel even when I was beaten, kicked, or cussed! I even became your political tool!¡± I pitied him at first. I sympathised with this man for being a pathetic man who couldn¡¯t be with the woman he loved and began to hate her because of grief. I believed in this man as my father when he first took me in, and I silently endured his random outbursts of anger. It was also something that I had to do to live. I lost my mother, who was my only family. I was sad and lonely and just wanted someone by my side, no matter who they were. I believed that he would love me once he regained his sanity. Sometimes, while intoxicated by my unhappy self, I would continue my silly dreams, like my mother¡¯s favourite novel for young girls¡­ ¡ºI won¡¯t let you be happy. I¡¯ll make you suffer more than I have.¡» However, that dream was smashed a long time ago. I don¡¯t feel sorry for this man anymore. ¨D¨D¨D I have nothing to do with this man, or Victoria or the Lagerfeld family. ¡°So, I won¡¯t do what you say anymore! I will live by my own will!¡± I screamed. I glared at the man as if I was intimidating him and vented the first thing that came to mind. ¡°You, shameless, ungrateful¡­!¡± He swung his arm again, and his soft and flabby fist was coming towards me. ¨D¨D¨D I won¡¯t groan no matter how painful it is. I clenched my teeth and closed my eyes tightly to prepare for the impact. Chapter 17 Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles I heard the door open right after I shut my eyes tightly. ¡°That¡¯s enough, Lord Lagerfeld.¡± ¡°What?! What are you doing?!¡± The shock never came no matter how much time passed, and I timidly opened my eyes questioningly. Juris stood by the man and grabbed the thick arms, which were about to strike me. ¡°Juris.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Why are you here? I looked up at the tall butler in surprise. Why is Juris here and stopping that man? I looked at the entrance and saw that the door was wide open. I understood that he had flown into the room from the loud sound I heard before. ¨D¨D¨D Did he come here to stop the man because he knew I was being struck? ¡°Let go! I¡¯m punishing this fool, you know?! I know you hate her too! Do you know how much she¡¯s bothered others¡­?!¡± ¡°I know,¡± Juris said with a smile suitable for an excellent butler. ¡°However, using violence, no matter the reason, is something I don¡¯t agree with.¡± The man must have regained a little composure from the calm tone. He violently shook off Juris¡¯s hand and calmed his rough breath. ¡°That isn¡¯t violence. It¡¯s education. Children who do bad things should be whipped, right? It¡¯s the same as that. I¡¯m educating my daughter.¡± ¡°Then you don¡¯t need to hit her so many times, much less kick her. This is a one-sided assault. I can¡¯t just keep silent and watch.¡± ¡°Mr Heiman, who do you think you are? You¡¯re arrogant for a servant.¡± ¡°Pardon me. Blood rushed to my head a little because I saw that the Madam was receiving unreasonable violence. It seems like I¡¯m still inexperienced as a servant,¡± Juris declared calmly. He ignored the man who was going to flare up and kneeled beside me. ¡°Are you okay?¡± His smile had disappeared, and his poker-face was back, but his voice sounded unusually heartfelt. On top of that, he presented me his right hand as if he wanted to help me up. ¨D¨D¨D Is he seriously worried? I stared at his hand. His hands were usually in gloves, but today he didn¡¯t have them on, and they were bony like a man¡¯s hand and didn¡¯t match his delicate facial features. His rough skin is probably due to the harsh work he has to do every day, and from the chemical he uses to polish silverware. When I didn¡¯t take his hand, he narrowed his cold grey eyes which were like his master¡¯s and gave a long sigh. ¡°Let me see.¡± I didn¡¯t even have time to reply, ¡°What?¡± He stretched his hand out and gripped my cheek which had been hit. I was pulled to the side before I could protest and then he looked me right in the face. ¡°Hey, Juris.¡± ¡°It¡¯s swollen. He seems to have hit you with considerable force. Why didn¡¯t you call for help?¡± Juris released the hand which was gripping my cheeks and glared as if he was blaming me. I glared back at him because I didn¡¯t know what he was talking about, and he continued to mutter words that I didn¡¯t understand, ¡°I was waiting the whole time.¡± ¡°What do you¡­?¡± ¡°I see. So, you were secretly listening in. Humph, you look like you have an indecently crude personality.¡± The man standing behind Juris said in disappointment. He looked down at the scene that was unfolding in front of his eyes with contempt and folded his arms in irritation. ¡°I thought it was a little strange when I saw the interaction between you two. I waited in front of the door so that if something happens, I can force my way in. As a servant, I should protect Madam¡­ Although, I could have heard you even if I hadn¡¯t listened in because you shout so loud, Lord Lagerfeld.¡± ¡°Cut it out! What¡¯s with your roguish attitude?!¡± The furious man rushed at Juris, he grabbed Juris¡¯s collar like he had done with me and just barely choked him. ¡°Who do you think you are when you¡¯re just a servant?! I¡¯m a noble, you know?! It¡¯s easy to get you fired, you know!? Um?!¡± ¨D¨D¨D Argh, enough. That¡¯s why it¡¯s not good to be direct. ¡°Ma-¡­ Father! Please stop!¡± Juris didn¡¯t resist as his collar was held, and I couldn¡¯t stand by and watch as he was yelled at. I even forgot about the pain in my cheek and flew at the man. However, I couldn¡¯t pull him away because I was powerless, and he brushed me off, and I tumbled onto the floor again. ¡°Don¡¯t get in my way! You trash!¡± ¡°The trash is you, right?¡± A low voice crept, and the man staggered and fell in a flashy way. ¡°What¡­!¡± As soon as the man¡¯s fat body hit the floor, it made a loud noise as if the whole room was shaking. I couldn¡¯t tell what was happening, but Juris pushed the man away and quickly tripped him. He was so fast and nimble. The man couldn¡¯t avoid Juris, tripped, fluttered in the air and fell to the floor. ¨D¨D¨D Amazing. I remained grovelled on the ground with my mouth agape. The man cussed on the floor. He had hit his body hard, and his back looked like it hurt a lot. The impact must have been considerable since he¡¯s massive. It looked like he wanted to get up straight away and return the favour, but he probably couldn¡¯t move his body because he just glared at Juris hatefully. ¡°You-!¡± ¡°Excuse me. But, you¡¯re the one who grabbed me. I only protected myself. This is called self-defence. Isn¡¯t that right, Madam?¡± ¡°That¡¯s¡­¡± ¨D¨D¨D No matter how you put it, it¡¯s overkill. I, who was helped up by Juris, couldn¡¯t even agree and stood there confused. His voice sounded bright as if it hadn¡¯t been low before, and he was smiling brightly. The man writhed in pain on the floor. What should I do in this situation? In the first place, I didn¡¯t understand why Juris, who would never help me, had protected me. ¨D¨D¨D Even if I get kidnapped, he would probably just watch and smile¡­ When I held my aching cheeks and stood there blankly, rough footsteps came closer. ¡°Ophelia!¡± Now what? I thought as I stared at the opened entrance, and two servants and a handsome young man came rushing in while panting. The handsome young man¡­ Orpheus looked at the disastrous room, especially my miserable face, and his expression changed. He stared coldly at the man who collapsed on the floor. ¡°What is¡­ the meaning of this, Lord Lagerfeld?¡± I gulped. His voice was more horrible than Juris¡¯s low voice and made my spine freeze. The temperature in the room dropped drastically. The man, who was engulfed by anger, must have felt the same as me, he glared sharply at Orpheus, but couldn¡¯t say anything. ¡°I asked you what is the meaning of this, Lord Lagerfeld. I rushed here because I heard from a servant that you were assaulting my wife. Is this true?¡± ¡°Th-that man is the violent one! He pushed me, then kicked me, and I fell down! It¡¯s obvious if you look at how I am right now!¡± The man answered in anger. I came back to my senses. Juris will be the one in the wrong if this goes on. I became desperate and defended him, ¡°No! Orpheus, Juris protected me! Juris pushed him and tripped him because he grabbed Juris! It¡¯s self-defence!¡± Is it really okay to call that self-defence? ¨D¨D¨D I wondered as I spoke, but this doesn¡¯t change the fact that Juris helped me. I thought I should defend him, even if I exaggerate a little so that he wouldn¡¯t be charged with a crime. ¡°Ophelia! You fucking-¡­¡± ¡°Is that so, Juris?¡± Orpheus looked down expressionlessly at the man who was looking up hatefully at his daughter and turned to face Juris, who was standing right next to me. Juris nodded, and answered in his usual calm tone, ¡°It¡¯s just like Madam had just said. He suddenly grabbed me, and I felt threatened, so I resisted. Well, I was also angry that he called Madam trash.¡± ¡°Trash?¡± Orpheus¡¯s perfectly shaped eyebrows lifted up. ¡°You¡¯re listening to nonsense spouted by that lowly servant! Lord Rosenstein, fire that man right now! He became violent after ranting! You should fire him and kick him out of the mansion!¡± ¡°Ophelia.¡± Orpheus ignored the man and stood in front of me. His handsome face wasn¡¯t expressionless as always and looked like he was enduring pain. The sadness in his blue eyes made my chest tighten, but it didn¡¯t make me feel cold. ¡°Did you get hit?¡± ¡°¡­ Ah!¡± His voice was filled with anger, but if I told him that I was hit, then he looked like he would punch the man with his tightened fist, so I couldn¡¯t say anything. ¡°She wasn¡¯t just hit, she was also kicked,¡± Juris said in my stead, and Orpheus¡¯s thin lips tightened in a straight line. ¡°Where?¡± ¡°¡­ My shoulder, but it doesn¡¯t hurt anymore.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry. I couldn¡¯t stay by your side and protect you.¡± ¡°Huh?¡± I couldn¡¯t believe Orpheus¡¯s words and looked up. He had already turned around and was firing instructions at the servants. ¡°Help Lord Lagerfeld up, Daniel and Marc. Call a doctor immediately after you do¡­ Juris, bring me 20 million marcas from the safe, white paper, a pen and a red ink pad.¡± Juris left the parlour. The servants helped the man, who couldn¡¯t get up by himself and sat him down on a chair. The man violently brushed away the servants¡¯ hands as soon as he sat down. He fixed his dishevelled clothes and hair and glared. Then, he faced Orpheus and smiled. ¡°Lord Rosenstein. Let me say this since you seem to be misunderstanding something. I am reprimanding my foolish daughter. I couldn¡¯t stand it after I heard the rumours. I wanted her to know exactly who she should be grateful to for her extravagant life.¡± Orpheus didn¡¯t answer. He took my arm, sat me in a chair away from the man and checked my swollen cheeks. I was at a loss about whether to resist, but I thought that it would be better if I didn¡¯t cause any further uproar, so I behaved myself. ¡°This girl is an absolute moron,¡± the man kept talking even though no one was listening to him. ¡°If she can¡¯t understand with words, then you should persuade her by hitting her. This girl is slow. She behaves as if nothing had happened even if you hit her several times.¡± ¡°Have you always hit Ophelia for not listening to you?¡± Orpheus asked in an expressionless voice as he gazed at my cheek. The man must have been happy that he finally got a reply because he smiled. ¡°Yes. That¡¯s a parent¡¯s responsibility. Lord Rosenstein, you should do it too. Oh, but I¡¯m sorry for bothering you. If you don¡¯t mind, I can take her home and re-educate her? She won¡¯t behave foolishly again. She¡¯ll behave herself and become an obedient woman. I can¡¯t do anything about her gloomy face and thin body, though.¡± He¡¯d said something horrible, but I stayed quiet. Because I¡¯m a fool who needs to be re-educated. Even if I were to be re-educated, it might not be bad if I can come back. In my case, it wouldn¡¯t be strange if he told me that he wanted to divorce me right now. ¨D¨D¨D But, even so, that might be fine. It¡¯s still better to be a prostitute than return to the Lagerfeld house, and my purpose of getting divorced can be achieved. If Orpheus can be happy, then it doesn¡¯t matter what happens afterwards. I don¡¯t mind crawling in mud for that or even dying. ¡°Orpheus, I¡­¡± ¡°Lord Lagerfeld.¡± Orpheus turned around as soon as I opened my mouth. ¡°What is it?¡± The man laughed. ¡°As you wish, I¡¯ll give you an additional 20 million marcas right now.¡± ¡°Oh! Really?!¡± ¨D¨D¨D Did you request for an additional loan? I was stunned when I heard their interaction. This man was extorting Orpheus for a lot of money. Perhaps, he had come to this mansion not to hit me, but to receive the money. At any rate, how much has Orpheus loaned this man in total? I have to pay him back if we get divorced, but my savings might not be enough. I don¡¯t know if I can pay him back even if I sell my body for the rest of my life. I thought, and Orpheus said something that made me doubt my ears, ¡°You don¡¯t have to pay me back. I¡¯ll give this to you, along with the 40 million marcas that I¡¯ve loaned you before.¡± ¡°What?!¡± Not only me, but the man and the servants were also surprised. Giving him a total of 60 million marcas¡­ Has Orpheus gone crazy?! ¡°I¡¯ll also pay the taxes. In exchange¡­ never show up in this mansion again.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Ah, so it¡¯s like that? My whole body went weak, and I felt like I was going to slip off my chair. As I thought, Orpheus intends to use this opportunity to break off with the Lagerfeld House. Return the daughter in exchange for the money and break up all ties with the Lagerfeld House. He didn¡¯t need to go that far, I was the one who should pay alimony, and yet he was throwing his money down the drain. ¡°I also forbid you from contacting my wife.¡± ¡°Huh?¡± ¨D¨D¨D What did Orpheus just say? I held my breath and strained my ears so that I wouldn¡¯t miss a single word Orpheus said. ¡°The money I loaned you is consolation money. I¡¯ll give it all to you, so let¡¯s end our relationship. Well, I might say hi to you if we meet outside¡­ If you can¡¯t promise me this, then you won¡¯t get your additional loan.¡± ¡°In short, you want me to sell my daughter for money?¡± Orpheus didn¡¯t reply nor nod. I couldn¡¯t tell what he was thinking from his expression. He just stared quietly at the man. The man stared at the speechless me in disdain and suddenly began to laugh. He folded his arms and looked as if he was pondering, then he said as if the scales had tipped towards the large amount of money instead of my utility value, ¡°Alright.¡± ¡°I¡¯ll give you this useless good-for-nothing if you want her.¡± ¡°Then, can you write that down?¡± ¡°Orpheus!¡± ¨D¨D¨D What a waste! I¡¯m not a woman who is worth sixty million marcas. I had almost shrieked, but Orpheus didn¡¯t turn back. ¡°Of course! Hahahaha! Lord Rosenstein, you¡¯re also a fool! Because you¡¯re wasting 60 million marcas for such a girl! She¡¯s not worth that much!¡± ¡°It¡¯s cheap if I can get her for just 60 million marcas.¡± ¡°Hah?¡± ¡°No, don¡¯t worry about it.¡± Then, Juris came back with an envelope full of money and other tools. Orpheus whispered something to Juris who nodded in return. Then, he began spreading the tools he¡¯d brought onto the table. Orpheus came back to where I was and gently grabbed my elbow. ¡°Come, Ophelia. Cool your face.¡± ¡°Lord Rosenstein.¡± The man called before I could say anything. But Orpheus, who had taken my arm and walked me to the door, didn¡¯t even stop, then he said as if he was turning the man down, ¡°Take care, Lord Lagerfeld.¡± Chapter 18 - A Painful Conversation Orpheus led me to my room on the second floor. Claire was making my bed in the room, and she tilted her head when she saw that I was with Orpheus and immediately shrieked when she saw my swollen cheeks, ¡°Madam!¡± She abandoned the blanket cover that she was replacing and ran to me. She examined my cheeks which had swelled more with time, and cried, ¡°You¡¯re horrible. So horrible, Master! How can you beat your wife?!¡± ¡°Huh?¡± Tears ran down her large eyes. I knew that Claire had falsely accused Orpheus, and quickly tried to clear up the misunderstanding. ¡°Yo-you¡¯re wrong, Claire! He didn¡¯t do it! Someone else did!¡± ¡°What¡­?! Who, who did that?! I won¡¯t forgive them. I¡¯ll hit them back!¡± ¡°Calm down, Claire. I¡¯ve already cut ties with that man. He won¡¯t get involved with Ophelia anymore.¡± ¡°But¡­!¡± ¡°Juris already paid him back. He shut up when I told him I would give him money, but he¡¯ll complain if something else happens to him. By the way¡­¡± Orpheus, who looked between the agitated Claire and I, who was trying to calm her down, said, ¡°You two are pretty close.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Shit. Cold sweat dripped down my back. Shit. We¡¯ve done it. I¡¯m supposed to treat the servants harshly. They¡¯re supposed to hate me, and I¡¯m not supposed to have any allies in this mansion¡­ but, that picture is going to collapse at this rate. It¡¯s unnatural for a serious and pure young maid to adore the selfish and arrogant Countess Rosenstein. I had to deceive him somehow, even if just for this instant. Claire and I looked at each other and exchanged looks. ¡°Pretty close? Me and a servant? This isn¡¯t a joke.¡± I looked up arrogantly and folded my arms pompously. ¡°This is the result of training. I strictly instructed her to devote her all to me. This is the result. I don¡¯t treat the servants generously like you do. I train them to do everything for me¡­ Right, Claire? You don¡¯t want to experience something painful for not complying with my wishes, right?¡± Claire matched me. Her shoulders shivered, and she hung her head down like a scared puppy. She put her thin hands on her chest as if she was begging for forgiveness. ¡°Oh my, that¡¯s cute. She¡¯s all scared. But well, that¡¯s how she is. Claire, you¡¯re in the way. Get out.¡± ¡°Y-yes.¡± ¡°Wait, Claire.¡± Orpheus detained Claire, who tried to leave the room with her head drooped down. ¡°Bring me a clean cloth and a bucket of water. I want to cool her cheeks down.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t need those things.¡± ¡°Look in the mirror to see how your cheeks are¡­ I¡¯ll leave it to you, Claire.¡± Claire¡¯s red-faced head shook, and she bowed, ¡°Understood.¡± She quietly closed the door. ¡°Won¡¯t you still make it right now?¡± I said some time after she left. I was keenly aware that Orpheus was staring at me and glared at the roses at the corner of the room as if I was killing my parents. ¡°Why don¡¯t you go to that man and tell him to pretend that that conversation never happened?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not going to do that.¡± ¡°Orpheus, are you really planning on throwing 60 million marcas down the ditch?¡± I looked up at Orpheus, who was standing next to me. Then, his blue eyes stared at me in the same way, and as soon as our eyes met, his big eyes narrowed like a cat. ¡°I¡¯m not planning on throwing it down the ditch, and I didn¡¯t think that I could get the money back when I lent it to him. Lord Lagerfeld has no business talents. His investments will fail.¡± ¡°That¡¯s why you should get it back,¡± I hesitated to say this when I remembered my half-sister. What will happen to that child if his investments fail? ¡°¡­ It¡¯s not like they¡¯ll all fail, right? And the amount of tax you have to pay on that sum of money is ridiculous. No matter how wealthy the Rosenstein House is if you do something like this then¡­¡± ¡°This is surprising.¡± Orpheus smiled wryly. The cold light in his eyes softened a little. ¡°I didn¡¯t think the current you would say something like that. I really can¡¯t tell what your real intentions are.¡± Is he telling me not to talk about money when I waste so much of it? ¡°I don¡¯t have any real intentions. I¡¯m angry because you threw away a large sum of money for a stupid reason. What consolation money? You hate me, right? Then, you should give me back to that man right away. You should get back all the money you lent him and divorce me.¡± ¨D¨D¨D This isn¡¯t like Countess Rosenstein. I suddenly thought that. I¡¯m not acting how I usually do. If I were, I would probably shout for joy at not having to go back to my disgusting parent¡¯s house and could continue to live my lavish life. With so much joy, I might be able to butter up to Orpheus who was hiding the scorn in his heart. ¡°It¡¯s thanks to you,¡± I should have said. Even though I knew this, I felt compelled to say, ¡°Why did you act like that? Why did you protect me?¡± Unable to look Orpheus in the eyes, I diverted my gaze. ¡°Did you think that I would act obediently if you gained my gratitude? How about if you threatened me like that man by saying ¡ºWho should you be grateful to for your extravagant life¡», so that I would act obediently?¡± ¡°Ophelia.¡± ¡°Too bad, it doesn¡¯t work like that. I¡¯m not going to change how I behave, no matter what you do or say. Well, if it¡¯s just a little then I don¡¯t mind being a good girl, but that probably won¡¯t last long. Because I love indulging myself. I¡¯m different from your cute Diana.¡± Then, I smiled. I planned on smiling fearlessly, but I ended up sneering at myself. ¡°Hey, Orpheus. We¡¯re already¡­¡± ¡°Sit down,¡± Orpheus finally uttered, but that wasn¡¯t the answer I wanted. ¡°Do you listen to what people say?¡± ¡°Of course, I do. This seems like it¡¯ll take a while, so it¡¯s better to sit down and talk. And, for personal reasons, it¡¯s hard to stand up after staying up all night.¡± I remembered that Orpheus had just come back from the royal palace. I pretended to think for a bit, and then said, ¡°Fine.¡± I sat on the couch, and Orpheus sat on the one-seated across from the low table. Claire hadn¡¯t returned. Neither Orpheus nor I spoke, and the room was covered in an eerie silent; even my own breathing felt noisy. ¡°I have to apologise to you first,¡± Orpheus began after a long silence. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, I couldn¡¯t protect you. This is my fault. I didn¡¯t think he would visit without contacting me first. Lord Lagerfeld and I both use messengers or meet outside¡­ Anyway, I¡¯m sorry. I should have ordered Juris not to let him contact you. It¡¯s all my fault. I¡¯m really sorry.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Ah, why is this person¡­ I wanted to cry. Why is this person sometimes so gentle and so sincere that it feels stifling? He usually looks down on me with cold eyes, but why is he looking at me with eyes full of regret and begging for forgiveness? Even though it¡¯s all my fault. Even though I¡¯m sorry for being born as that man¡¯s child, for betraying Orpheus and for becoming a foolish woman. ¡°You don¡¯t have to apologise. I don¡¯t think it¡¯s your fault. That man is the crazy one, so he would¡¯ve come to my room if Juris stopped him. He¡¯s the one to blame, not you. That¡¯s not what I¡¯m asking you. I¡¯m asking you why you gave him 60 million marcas,¡± I looked down and asked in a muffled voice. I don¡¯t know what expression Orpheus was making because I was looking down, but his voice sounded a little different than usual, ¡°To protect you.¡± ¡°¡­ What?¡± I raised my face. Both Juris and Orpheus say things that make me doubt my ears today. I keep thinking I¡¯m mishearing things because of them and have to ask them to repeat themselves. ¡°I thought I could protect you if I kept you by my side after we married, but I was na?ve. I thought I had no choice but to break up your relationship with Lord Lagerfeld. I don¡¯t intend¡­ on making you feel gratitude towards me or making you obedient.¡± ¡°Why?¡± I was stunned to find out that I hadn¡¯t misheard him. ¡°¡­ Why do you go so far to protect me? You didn¡¯t have to do that much. It doesn¡¯t matter what happens to me after we marry¡­¡± ¡°Is it strange for a husband to protect his wife?¡± I was speechless because of this. It certainly wasn¡¯t strange for a husband to protect his wife. However, it was odd for Orpheus to defend me. I¡¯m a bad wife who people frown at just by hearing my name. Isn¡¯t it natural for him to send me back to my parent¡¯s house then and there and divorce me? ¨D¨D¨D And yet, why did this person do that¡­? My eyes wandered around because I was upset, and the smile I tried to put on my face twitched. Still, I somehow managed to reply with sarcasm, ¡°You¡¯re as kind as ever. You¡¯re a wonderful husband who tries to protect such a ¡®wife¡¯. Fufu, you¡¯re like a fool.¡± ¡°Ophelia.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Don¡¯t call me with that voice. I wanted to block my ears the moment he called my name. I remembered those days, my feelings for Orpheus were pouring out, and I felt like I was going to go crazy. ¡°It¡¯s probably my fault that you¡¯ve become like this. How do I fix it¡­? I¡¯ve asked this many times, and you probably won¡¯t answer me even if I ask you again right now.¡± I turned away. I don¡¯t want to talk about this anymore. If we do, then he will start saying that he will send Diana away, and finally, he would say, ¡°I won¡¯t see her again.¡± It took a lot of effort to stop him from thinking this. It¡¯s better to refuse this discussion. ¡°I know. It¡¯s already too late, right? Like you said, I¡¯m a fool. I¡¯m probably beyond saving.¡± I shifted my eyes and froze when I looked at Orpheus, who was sitting right across from me. He looked really exhausted. The grief on his face deepened, and he looked so frail that it seemed like he was going to collapse at any moment. It was my first time seeing Orpheus like this, and I was shocked that it felt as if my heart was being stabbed. ¨D¨D¨D I want to rush over to him and hug him. I want to hug him, pat his head, and comfort him. Please don¡¯t look like that. You¡¯re not a fool. Those words aren¡¯t true. I was driven by a strong urge, but it wasn¡¯t something I was allowed to do now. I could only hold onto my skirt and bear with it. ¡°I actually know.¡± Orpheus smiled faintly, hung his head down and put his hand on his forehead. His figure and voice were filled with regret. ¡°I know what I should do and what I can do, but I can¡¯t let you go. I¡¯m selfish and a coward. I¡¯m really a hopeless moron.¡± ¡°Orpheus, I¡­¡± I know your feelings. I know that you love Diana with all your heart and that you regret choosing your foster father¡¯s last request instead of the woman you love. Because I¡¯m always looking at you. ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s okay. I¡¯ll make your wishes come true. I¡¯ll make you happy this time. If you can¡¯t let me go because of his last request, then I¡¯ll create a situation where you will have to let me go. I will hurt over and over in place of the cowardly you. ¨D¨D¨D I love you. I¡¯ll do anything for you. We can¡¯t start over anymore. But, I¡¯m sure you and Diana can. I¡¯ll make it happen. ¨D¨D¨D So, please¡­ ¡°Orpheus, look up.¡± ¡°Ophelia.¡± His handsome face, which he slowly lifted up was distorted like a broken ceramic doll. I wanted to hug him and help him with his pain and anguish, but there¡¯s nothing I can do now. Would he laugh like that day if I bring Diana here¡­? I suddenly came up with this idea. This is my room, but I don¡¯t mind lending it to them if they don¡¯t take too long if Orpheus smiles and cheers up a little. ¡°No matter what you become or what you do¡­¡± Orpheus stopped there and covered his face. When he lowered his white hand, his dazzling face went back to being expressionless, and his blue eyes which were like the sea were a few times colder than usual. That coldness made me choke, and goosebumps ran down my spine. ¡°You¡¯re my wife. That won¡¯t change in the future. My feelings of wanting to protect you will never change. Even if you hate me or love another man.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Do you want to protect your foster father¡¯s last request that much? It was like being strangled by flexible fingers. Why does this person sometimes corner me in such a cruel way? The more stubborn Orpheus is, the more mistakes I have to make. I have to make you hate me more. ¡°Ophelia, please forgive me,¡± Orpheus said when I was about to shut my eyes off to everything I can see. ¡°I will definitely not¡­¡± His thin lips moved slightly, but I couldn¡¯t hear him. I couldn¡¯t hear him because he was too quiet, and I didn¡¯t ask what he had said. When Claire returned, Orpheus made sure that the doctor checked me before leaving. He said that he would be resting in his room because he had a headache and felt dizzy from lack of sleep. When Claire and I were alone, I clung to her and cried. ¡°Why is that person so kind to me!?¡± I shouted. Tears fell down my eyes and soaked the gauze on my cheek. The tears didn¡¯t seem like they would stop no matter how much I wiped it. That¡¯s why I let my emotions out. ¡°Why does he have a lover?! Why isn¡¯t it me?! Even though I love him. I love him more than anyone else!¡± These were the ugly desires that built up deep in my heart. ¨D¨D¨D Why doesn¡¯t he love me? Even though I love him so much. Even though I love him more than anyone else. ¨D¨D¨D Why doesn¡¯t he look at me? Why won¡¯t he choose me? Even though I would do anything for him. ¡°Madam.¡± Claire hugged me and patted my back. She cried with me. Just like the day when I confessed my determination to betray Orpheus and throw everything away for his happiness. ¡°I know. I know, Claire. I know I can¡¯t turn back. I¡¯m not qualified to tell him that I love him.¡± I¡¯m a fool. My feelings overflow when Orpheus is kind to me. I¡¯m going to break down. ¨D¨D¨D Why? Why? Why? Even though we¡¯re married. Even though we¡¯re supposed to kiss and make love, why? I¡¯m a fool. Orpheus loves Diana. His love belongs to Diana. It¡¯s something I can never get. And I¡¯ve already accepted this. I understand this. Orpheus saved me, and I thought that was enough. I want nothing from him, and I will spend my entire life returning this favour. And yet, I fell in love with him. I love him. I broke the thin ice beneath my feet and fell into the cold water. I¡¯m a fool. I was getting my just desserts, and I was the one who was wrong, not anyone else, but I was still filled with regret. If Diana didn¡¯t exist, if she wasn¡¯t here, then Orpheus might love me. He might turn the smile he shows Diana towards me. If Diana, if she wasn¡¯t here. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, aren¡¯t I the hopeless fool? ¡°But please. Please forgive me only for now.¡± I asked for forgiveness from no one. ¨D¨D¨D Forgive me. Forgive the foolish me. Forgive me for being shaken by those words and for being weak. Forgive me for dreaming of a future where I could walk next to Orpheus. ¡°I¡¯ll definitely make that person, Orpheus, happy.¡± I continued to weep. It was dim outside because dusk was approaching, and it began to rain before I knew it. Chapter 19 - Juris’s Monologue Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles The swelling of my beaten cheeks and kicked shoulders grew darker as time went by, and it hurt when it got hot at night. However, according to the doctor¡¯s diagnosis, there was nothing wrong with my bones and the swelling will fade in about a week. The swelling on my shoulders could be hidden with my clothes, but the swelling on my cheeks couldn¡¯t be covered with makeup, and there was a possibility that it would get worse if I mess with it. I couldn¡¯t go out in public with my face like this, so I had to shamefully spend time in the mansion for the time being. I applied the ointment that the doctor had given me and put a gauze on my cheeks so that the blood would break down and spent time secluded in my room. The only things I could do to pass time was read and practice embroidery. The rest of my days were spent chatting to Claire, looking out the garden, writing letters to Claude and living a simple and calm life; which was unlike what Countess Rosenstein would do. Night came earlier, probably because the weather was terrible. After my bath, Juris appeared in the dark with his systematic footsteps as I walked alone to my room in the corridor under the candlelight. I, who was thinking, stopped in surprise and looked up at the butler, who had stopped in the same way. The tall young man, dressed in a black suit, seemed to almost merge into the darkness around him, and his white, graceful features stood out, giving him a completely different impression from when I saw him when it was bright out. Orpheus was also hard to understand, but Juris, who served him, was even harder to understand than his master. I know he doesn¡¯t like me, but I don¡¯t know what he¡¯s thinking about. Even when he looks disinterested or smiles. ¡°Juris,¡± I called out to Juris after hesitating for a while as he bowed and tried to walk past me. Well, I haven¡¯t thanked him yet, so I wanted to say it here. ¡°Thank you for helping me.¡± I didn¡¯t face him even though I was in front of him because I didn¡¯t want him to look at me coldly after I had given him my sincere gratitude. I can pretend that nothing happened no matter what his expression is if I don¡¯t see it. ¡°I just did my job as a servant,¡± Juris answered in a calm voice as if he was reading a textbook. I looked down and tilted my head. Really? ¨D¨D¨D Why did he help me at that time? It was strange to me. Why did Juris help me? Why did he volunteer his body to protect me? He, who seemed like he would be happy if Orpheus and I got divorced, felt that something was wrong from the conversation he had heard between that man and me, and waited outside the door while listening attentively. He immediately jumped into the room after I was beaten, kicked, beaten again, and stopped that man. He was even worried about my cheeks which had been hit. Juris said he had only done what he needed to do as a servant, but his behaviour was utterly surprising to me. ¡°Really?¡± I asked as if I was teasing him while lifting the corners of my lips. ¡°Really. I only did what I had to do as a servant. I could have remained on the side-lines.¡± Juris Heiman, like the other servants, was backing Diana. He had treated me with a lot of respect when I had married into the Rosenstein House for the first few months, but when I started my bad wife act, he began acting coldly towards me. He probably didn¡¯t like that I wasn¡¯t acting appropriately for someone of the Rosenstein House, more than me tearing up the relationship between Orpheus and Diana. He has served Orpheus ever since Orpheus was adopted into this House, so as a childhood friend, he couldn¡¯t forgive me for being ill-matched with Orpheus. He rebuked me many times for my behaviour, but he knew that I wasn¡¯t going to change, and stopped scolding me probably because he was disgusted or because he had given up, and just silently sent cold glances my way. In other words, it¡¯s my fault that he hates me, so it was surprising for him to protect me. Did he really just perform his duty as a servant? If he hates me, then why didn¡¯t he just stay on the side-lines? Isn¡¯t it normal to feel good when a foolish woman enrages her father since she¡¯s getting what she deserves? ¡°I don¡¯t know what kind of answer you are looking for, Madam,¡± Juris stopped speaking, and closed his eyes as if asking why he had to answer such a foolish question. ¡°It¡¯s wrong for someone to pretend not to see a person get hit one-sidedly, no matter the reason. And you¡¯re a frail woman, and the partner of my master, whom I look up to and respect. It would have been fine had they just been words, but I couldn¡¯t stand by and watch as you get hit.¡± ¡°Really? I feel like that¡¯s something you would do.¡± ¡°Are you saying I¡¯m not human?¡± ¡°To the extent that you would ruthlessly discard the person you hate.¡± Juris shut his mouth. Is he uncomfortable with being insulted, or can he not reply because it¡¯s true? However, when I saw that Juris was puzzled, I suddenly realised that this was a stupid exchange. ¨D¨D¨D Let¡¯s stop. I don¡¯t want to argue. I just wanted to thank him for that time. I only took this chance to ask him this question, not to exchange sarcasm. And, not all humans act for profit or lost just because my thoughts are warped. There might be people who would reach their hands out without hesitation even if it¡¯s the person who they hate that has fallen into a dilemma. ¡°I¡¯m sorry. I said too much. You are human, you¡¯re a fine gentleman. This is the truth, it isn¡¯t sarcasm, so don¡¯t get me wrong. Anyway, I just wanted to thank you. I¡¯m sorry for keeping you here for so long.¡± No matter his intentions, he still helped me. I said quickly and tried to leave. ¡°Madam,¡± he called me from behind and stopped me. I stopped moving the foot that had stepped forward. ¡°What?¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± I was confused when he suddenly apologised with no context. I turned back and saw that Juris was standing a bit away from me, and he stood quietly while carrying a dark shadow on his back. ¡°What is that apology for?¡± ¡°For being late in stopping him, and while knowing how you feel, I¡­¡± ¡°My feelings?¡± Juris kept his mouth shut and didn¡¯t answer. A frown appeared on his graceful face that I couldn¡¯t read, and he hung his head down as if he was enduring pain. ¡°What does that mean? What do you want to say?¡± ¡°You were perfect,¡± it was a whisper that sounded like a monologue, and it echoed through the quiet corridor. ¡°You were perfect for the first few months when you married into this House. Beautiful, modest, intelligent and thoughtful. You were a faultless woman who made that Lord Orpheus intoxicated. Nevertheless, you weren¡¯t wasteful, and you made strenuous effort behind your graceful smile. Not only did you cooperate with us to manage this mansion, but you also learnt how to manage the fief. You used your bedtime to read books to make up for your missing knowledge.¡± I held my breath and froze. I widened my eyes and listened to his monologue of regrets. ¡°I looked up to you. I was against this marriage at first, but I realised that I was wrong when I saw how you acted. You suit Lord Orpheus more than anyone else.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Then, why were you so cold towards me? I opened my mouth to ask this question but didn¡¯t say anything. No, I¡¯m wrong. Juris wasn¡¯t always cold towards me. He helped me many times when I was struggling to become a wife worthy of Orpheus. He helped me manage this mansion, and also taught me a lot of things. He also smoothed over my faults. Juris told me what books I should read and answered questions about things I didn¡¯t understand. He didn¡¯t tell me that I was working hard like Diana did, but he always supported me behind the scenes. He helped me. ¨D¨D¨D I was the one who betrayed him. Everyone was the same. Orpheus, Juris and Diana were all kind to me. They were nice to me. And yet, I betrayed them for my own selfish satisfaction. I betrayed their expectations. ¡°Juris, no. I¡­¡± ¡°Mrs Ophelia.¡± Juris certainly called me that and not madam. Mrs Ophelia, my name. ¡°I know. I know how you feel, and I know why you¡¯re doing this. I knew and kept silent. I¡¯m like you. I just want her to be happy. That¡¯s all. I know who Orpheus wants and loves, but I can only think of her, and you¡­¡± ¡°Juris, you¡¯re¡­¡± ¨D¨D¨D No way. Cold sweat dripped down my back, and I couldn¡¯t say anymore. My heart was beating fast, and I couldn¡¯t stand how noisy it was. I felt like I was suffocating even though I breathed in and out many times. My chest felt stuffy. ¡°Did you know?¡± I said as if I was gasping. ¨D¨D¨D Deny it. Say you didn¡¯t. If you don¡¯t, then the things that I have been desperately trying to accumulate will crumble. While enduring pain, the things I had taken time to accumulate one by one. I grasped my shaking hands tightly and looked up at Juris as if I was begging. ¡°You love Orpheus. You¡¯re trying to withdraw because you love him. You use the relationship between Orpheus and Diana as an excuse, and deliberately act in a hateful way so that he would divorce you.¡± The shadows increased on his slender body, and the dim candlelight illuminated his pale anguished face. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, why? I wanted to deny it as much as I could. No. That¡¯s not it. I don¡¯t love Orpheus. I wanted to shout, but on the other hand, there was a voice in my head that told me that there was no point in yelling this and it would just look unsightly. It¡¯s too late. He knows everything. ¨D¨D¨D So that¡¯s why he helped me at that time? ¡°Juris, why?¡± My stomach sank as if I had swallowed a heavy stone, and I felt nauseous. My feet felt fuzzy, and I didn¡¯t know if I was standing up straight. ¡°I had doubts when I saw you change. I heard that you told Orpheus that this is your true self, but I didn¡¯t believe it. You slaved away for Orpheus and the Rosenstein House, so there¡¯s no way you would be a frivolous hedonist. I wondered if there might be a reason for why you were behaving like this. Then, I noticed. You act like a selfish and moody person in front of others, but you go back to your calm and gloomy self. After saying hurtful things to others, you make a painful face even if it¡¯s faint and easy to miss.¡± ¡°That¡¯s¡­¡± I reflexively touched my face, and then let go because the dry feeling of the gauze was uncomfortable. Juris looked down on me with a pitiful expression, and continued, ¡°I noticed it because I had doubts since the beginning. I¡¯ve been observing you because I wanted to know who you really were. That¡¯s why I know you love Orpheus. When you look at him from a distance, you look happy and satisfied. You have a soft and loving smile on your face just like the Virgin Mary.¡± ¡°I know,¡± Juris whispered as if he was confessing his sins. ¡°I know, but I didn¡¯t tell Orpheus. I watched him worry, but I didn¡¯t tell him on purpose.¡± ¡°Why?¡± Juris looked like he was going to cry, and he covered his face with both his hands, then he mumbled, ¡°Without you, Diana can finally be with Orpheus¡­ Diana loves Orpheus.¡± I held my cold body and sighed. ¡°And, you love Diana.¡± ¨D¨D¨D You love her, so you kept silent for her. I stared at the young man, who was groaning as his shoulders shook, with mixed feelings. Feelings that I couldn¡¯t express well passed through my chest and I frowned painfully. ¨D¨D¨D Juris is like me. He just wishes for Diana¡¯s happiness. He just wants to see the person he loves be happy and smile joyfully. Even if his feelings never reach her and just crumbles away, he¡¯s fine as long as the person he loves is happy. He forgot his own status, and it¡¯s a selfish and foolish wish. However, I have no right to criticise him. I called Juris¡¯s name and got him to lift his face. ¡°If you regret remaining silent, then you don¡¯t need to anymore. It¡¯s not your fault that things became like this. Lord Orpheus and Diana aren¡¯t at fault. This is my own will. It¡¯s not like I didn¡¯t have any other choices, but I chose this path.¡± ¡°Mrs Ophelia.¡± ¡°I want to thank you. Lord Orpheus doesn¡¯t know how I feel about him, right?¡± Juris nodded sluggishly and answered, ¡°Orpheus is convinced that you hate him.¡± Hearing that, I was relieved that it was still alright. It hasn¡¯t crumbled to a point where I can¡¯t recover. I just need Juris to remain silent and keep on pretending that he doesn¡¯t know. ¡°Then, don¡¯t say anything to Lord Orpheus and remain quiet about it. And, you will treat me the same as you have until now.¡± ¡°No way, do you still plan on continuing? Orpheus won¡¯t let you go, you know? It¡¯s not necessary¡­¡± ¡°I won¡¯t give up,¡± I snapped at Juris who was trying to stop my foolishness, probably because he couldn¡¯t stand being stung by his conscience anymore. I will never give up. I won¡¯t give up after coming this far. ¡°I¡¯ll do anything. I¡¯ll do anything until he lets me go. I love him.¡± ¡°That¡¯s why you should¡­!¡± ¡°Juris, you love Diana, don¡¯t you? You wish for her happiness, don¡¯t you? You want her to always smile, don¡¯t you? It won¡¯t be much longer if you cooperate with me?¡± I hounded Juris with questions as he froze with his mouth wide open, and his grey eyes flickered violently. ¡°I can¡¯t turn back anymore. I¡¯ve hurt so many people to get here. I can only move forward. So, please, please.¡± ¡°But, Orpheus¡­¡± ¡°Juris, I¡¯m begging you. Don¡¯t get in my way.¡± As soon as I said this, I turned away as if refusing to talk to him. I held my pulsating chest, walked quickly down the corridor and leapt into my room. I violently slammed the door and slid onto the floor. ¡°Why Juris of all people?¡± My whisper disappeared in the quiet room. Juris is really an elusive and unpredictable person. Orpheus and Diana¡¯s happiness depends on him, but will he remain silent for the rest of his life? ¡°Juris, please, I¡¯m begging you.¡± I held my legs and gently put my head on them. I closed my eyes as if I was praying, and it felt as if I was the only person left in a dark world. I bit my lips at the anxiety that was drawing closer. Chapter 20 - Ophelia’s Pl Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles The room I was given overlooked the vast garden. The Rosenstein garden was filled with lush greenery, flowers in full bloom and colourful, geometric flower beds. The sky has been cloudy since half an hour ago, but now a few strips of light were emitted from the clouds and lit up the early summer garden as it rained. The sounds of the rain sounded like a systematic percussion instrument. I listened to the sound as I gazed at the world that had regained its brightness for a brief moment, and I felt my gloomy mood improve a little. ¨D¨D¨D Shall I take a walk in the garden later? It¡¯s better to breathe the outside air than be gloomy in a dim room. I thought as I took my forehead away from the window, and a young man and woman appeared arm-in-arm from the other side of the pear tree. The lady wearing a deep turquoise dress with a white hat that had a blue ribbon around it as if to match her dress was Diana, and the person escorting her was not Orpheus, but a young servant wearing a black suit¨D¨D¨D Juris. I often see Diana with Orpheus, or with one of her maids, but I rarely saw her with Juris. The two of them had their arms linked in a reserved way, and they slowly proceeded through the garden, which was wet with rain. Diana, with her bright personality, smiled at Juris as if she was a sunflower, and they were happily talking about something. ¨D¨D¨D Come to think of it, aren¡¯t Diana and Juris childhood friends? Juris and his parents served the Rosenstein House for two generations, and his father was currently managing the mansion at the fief, but he was a butler at this mansion before that. Therefore, I heard that Juris had become Orpheus¡¯s playmate and attendant not long after he came to this house. They had known each other for a long time, so of course, he would know Orpheus¡¯s cousin, Diana, for a long time as well. The youth, who always smiled calmly, was holding his stomach weirdly and laughing; probably because Diana had told a joke. Juris uttered harsh words sometimes, but he rarely revealed his emotions. It was surprising to see him laugh loudly. Diana had the mysterious power of making anyone smile, but I knew that there was a different reason for why Juris was laughing. He was laughing because of the painful feelings, he had hidden in his heart for a long time. ¨D¨D¨D My wish is also his wish. ¡°Did you find something interesting?¡± I was surprised by the sudden voice, and my shoulders shook. I turned around, and Orpheus was standing within reach. He stared at me, curiously. I didn¡¯t hear any footsteps, nor noticed his presence. A handsome face appeared near me when I turned around. Honestly, this person is terrible for my heart in many ways. ¡°Yes. See look. Your cousin and the butler are walking in the garden.¡± Orpheus looked out the window, narrowed his eyes when he saw them and said, ¡°Oh.¡± The light hit him, and his blue eyes shone like jewels. ¡°She must have been bored because it¡¯s been raining for days. Walking in the garden is one of her few pleasures.¡± ¡°Strange person. What is she going to do in the garden when she can¡¯t even see?¡± ¡°Feel the outside air on her skin, smell the flowers and enjoy her other senses.¡± ¡°Is that fun?¡± ¡°Why don¡¯t you try it? Just blindfold yourself and have someone guide you. I don¡¯t know if it¡¯s fun, but your careless remarks will probably reduce a little.¡± ¡°Should I not make any careless remarks?¡± ¡°Naturally.¡± ¡°I see. I¡¯ll do that if you say so.¡± I nimbly turned around, moved away from the window and returned to the couch. Orpheus also quietly followed after me and sat down on the one-seater across from me. ¡°Is it alright for you not to go?¡± ¡°Where?¡± Orpheus asked in return with a poker-face, and I replied in amazement, ¡°Of course to where Diana is.¡± ¡°She had no choice but to ask Juris for help because you¡¯re here. How pitiful. You can quickly go and take his place,¡± I said as I touched my face with my index finger. The swelling didn¡¯t show any signs of reducing, the gauze was still on my face, and it smelled slightly of ointment. ¡°You shouldn¡¯t touch it too much.¡± ¡°I was just curious. I wonder when it will heal.¡± ¡°The doctor said it would take about a week, but it might take longer if it¡¯s bad. If you want it to heal quickly, then don¡¯t irritate it and leave it alone.¡± ¡°It doesn¡¯t look good. ¨D¨D¨D Say, Orpheus. Is it alright for you not to go? Are you going to stay by my side?¡± ¡°If you¡¯ll let me.¡± ¡°Of course. Stay for as long as you like. I¡¯m delighted to be with you. ¨D¨D¨D Oh, the tea has gone cold, hasn¡¯t it? Shall I pour you a new cup?¡± I held the cup on the table, threw the cold contents into another bowl, and poured hot tea into the cup. ¡°Here you go.¡± ¡°Thanks. ¨D¨D¨D Will you continue the story from before?¡± ¡°The story from before¡­¡± My eyes wandered around restlessly. We were in the middle of a conversation, but I cheered up when I saw the rain had stopped and left my seat. I can¡¯t remember what we were talking about. It was really a pointless conversation that didn¡¯t even matter. ¡°It was about Viscount Barbara who slept with another woman even though he has a fianc¨¦e. There¡¯s a continuation, right?¡± ¡°Ah, oh. That¡¯s right. Yes. Well, that woman was Baron Raymond¡¯s wife. Can you believe it? Even as flattery, she isn¡¯t a beautiful person, and she¡¯s highly strung, and most importantly, they have a 20-year difference. Don¡¯t they seem like mother and child? Apparently, his fianc¨¦e found out, and she fainted from shock. Of course, others were against their relationship as well, and it became a big fuss. But Viscount Barbara didn¡¯t break up with Baron Raymond¡¯s wife, and they eventually eloped to Estrandal.¡± I did my best to keep on talking and felt miserable, wondering why I was talking about this. Why must I sorrowfully tell Orpheus about a Viscount¡¯s scandal that caused him to elope to another country? ¡°I feel sorry for his fianc¨¦e.¡± Moreover, Orpheus was listening with a serious expression and replied seriously. He also hmmm¡¯d along to the conversation, and his reactions were good. Better yet, I didn¡¯t feel like he was going to stop me by saying, ¡°Don¡¯t talk about vulgar things.¡± ¡°Right? She¡¯s so pitiful. Viscount Barbara should become unhappy.¡± As I cursed the strange Viscount Barbara, I wondered how long I would have to keep up this farce and tampered my lips. I acted unbefitting of Countess Rosenstein because I decided to take this opportunity to see how he would react if I changed my selfish, arrogant and domineering attitude and acted amicably. In other words, I was waiting to see how he would react before I earnestly started to flirt with him. With that incident as the impetus, Orpheus began visiting me almost every day to check the swelling of my cheeks and shoulders and persistently asked me if I was in pain. When he had time, he would have tea with me like this sometimes, would stay for a long time even though we weren¡¯t talking much, look at my embroidery, ask about the book on top of the table that I was reading, and behaved as if he wanted to stay with me even if just for one more second. Perhaps, he felt sorry for me because I couldn¡¯t go out because my father had hit me. Orpheus was still fulfilling the minimum duties of a husband, even though our relationship is broken. He is a faithful person. In any case, such opportunities are rare. Orpheus is a busy person. If I hadn¡¯t gotten injured, then he wouldn¡¯t bother to make time to see me, and we wouldn¡¯t be spending time together. It was an excellent opportunity to see what Orpheus¡¯s reaction would be when his wife, who is on bad terms with him, suddenly tried to flirt with him. Then, I suddenly changed my attitude and approached him. Orpheus had a lovely reaction; ¨D¨D¨D he looked at me in surprise and couldn¡¯t even speak. He was splendidly confused. However, he didn¡¯t press me for answers by saying, ¡°What are you planning on doing?¡± probably because he didn¡¯t want to argue with an injured person, or because he was worried about me. He concealed his confusion, touched the swelling on my cheeks, and kept a calm expression on his face without saying or doing anything. However, Diana was the exception. He would severely chide me if I spoke badly of her, but that can¡¯t be helped. Everyone has things they can stand and can¡¯t. Anyway, Orpheus¡¯s reaction wasn¡¯t bad. I was looking forward to imagining how he would react when my wounds have healed, and I will earnestly try to flirt with him. The problem is whether my willpower is strong enough or not. I¡¯m used to playing the bad wife, so that¡¯s fine, but I felt uncomfortable when I act spoiled or flirt with him, probably because I wasn¡¯t used to it, and sometimes my stomach would twist. Cold sweat even comes out. It¡¯s probably inevitable since I¡¯ve only gotten started. I shouldn¡¯t feel anything once it becomes a habit. Just like the days when I wore a mask and felt nothing as I was being scorned and looked at coldly. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯ll definitely get divorced. Not just for Orpheus. But also, for Diana and Juris. I won¡¯t cry anymore or complain. That day when I clung to Claire and cried is the last. Orpheus said he won¡¯t let me go, but I won¡¯t stay by his side. I have taken a lot from him¡­ his future with Diana, a great deal of time, and a large sum of money. I was occasionally moved by the times he would sometimes shower me with kindness but I can¡¯t make the person I love any more unhappy. We can¡¯t go back to how we were. I can only push towards the end. That¡¯s all I can do. I don¡¯t care about my appearance, no matter how unsightly I might seem. ¡°Orpheus, is it really alright?¡± ¨D¨D¨D Even though Juris loves Diana. White fingers covered a white porcelain cup with a large rose on it. I asked while gazing at his elegance, and he replied, ¡°What?¡± I regretted what I had asked while whispering, ¡°About Diana.¡± ¡°Why are you asking me about her?¡± ¡°¡­ I would feel bad if I got in your way. You treasure your walks with Diana, don¡¯t you?¡± ¡°Because that¡¯s the only time I get to talk to her. We have tea together sometimes, but we only walk together once a month, sometimes not even that.¡± I looked at Orpheus¡¯s face. What did he mean when he said that¡¯s the only time he gets to talk to her? Don¡¯t they meet more often, talk in their rooms, eat together and spend the night together? ¡°I feel sorry for her because she can only talk to the servants and me¡­ but she only talks about you. She misses the time she was on good terms with you. She¡¯s proud about what you two talked about, what presents you gave her and how close you two were. It¡¯s honestly frightening. She persistently asks me what we talk about. Anyway, she¡¯s really concerned about you.¡± ¡°Oh my, you don¡¯t have to lie to me, you know? You have meals together, go on picnics and do other things together, don¡¯t you?¡± Diana still thinks of me as a friend. When I ignored the pain from my chest and smiled, an unusual frown appeared on Orpheus¡¯s face. ¡°We don¡¯t. I don¡¯t even do those things with you. We¡¯ve been eating separately since before you came to this mansion. Diana said she doesn¡¯t want to be indecent, so she doesn¡¯t eat in front of others. She doesn¡¯t leave the mansion either.¡± ¡°Even so, it¡¯s a lie that you two only talk when you go on out walks and have tea, right? If not, Diana is¡­¡± ¡°I have you, so why do I need to spend time with Diana?¡± ¡°Why? Because¡­¡± When I tried to continue, he sighed and interrupted me, ¡°How many times do I have to say it for you to understand? Diana is my cousin, and she¡¯s family, but I don¡¯t have any romantic feelings for her. I love her as family, but I don¡¯t love her as a woman¡­ I¡¯ve said this countless times.¡± You¡¯re going on about this again? Orpheus always tells me white lies like this. He lies. Even though he treasures her a lot, laughs like that in front of her, and looks like they¡¯re lovers, and yet he tells these lies. He¡¯s trying to maintain our long-broken marital relationship. Even though it¡¯s so broken that you can¡¯t repair it anymore. ¡°You¡¯re as kind as ever. You¡¯re always considerate towards me like this.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not considerate. These are my true feelings.¡± I felt like my face was going to stiffen, but I kept the smile on my face. I smiled fakely at Orpheus. ¨D¨D¨D I won¡¯t be tricked, no matter what you say. Orpheus stared back at me and cut all emotion from his handsome face. There was a cold light in his blue eyes. ¡°You don¡¯t want to believe me at all. Do you¡­¡± ¡°I don¡¯t hate you.¡± ¡ºI loathe you.¡» I declared, easily overturning the words distorting his face. Orpheus¡¯s complexion didn¡¯t look good like that time. I stared out the window at the sky which was covered in dark clouds again and wondered if it was going to rain. ¡°I don¡¯t hate you. Rather the opposite. Actually, I¡¯m glad that you didn¡¯t go to Diana. I wanted to tell you this. Thanks for choosing me and not Diana.¡± I turned back, and Orpheus looked puzzled. He tightened his lips in a straight line and pondered; probably because he couldn¡¯t grasp the intentions of the woman in front of him. I slouched, rested my chin on my knees, pretended to admire Orpheus¡¯s handsome face, and laughed disgustingly. ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s okay. It¡¯ll definitely go well. ¡°Say, Orpheus. I think we should get along from now on. Because isn¡¯t it more fun that way for both of us?¡± Orpheus didn¡¯t agree or refuse the unnatural invitation, which apparently showed I was plotting something. He kept his legs crossed without moving and remained silent. Chapter 21 - Changed Opheli Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles After that, Orpheus visited my room many times and treated me with a shady and sweet attitude that seemed to hold a hidden meaning. I welcomed him with a big smile, talked gleefully, apologised obediently when he cautioned me on my arrogant remarks, and sometimes I touched his arms or shoulders. Orpheus, who was clearly suspicious of me, continued to accompany his eerie wife without saying anything, even though he did look confused at times; probably because he was being considerate towards the injured person or because he wanted to fulfil his duties as a husband. Two weeks after he started visiting me, the swelling on my cheeks got better, and the bruise on my shoulder disappeared. If you look closely, then my skin was a little yellowish, but I can hide that with makeup. The doctor said that the bruises will disappear in a few days, and my skin would return to normal, so there aren¡¯t any adverse effects even if I apply white powder on my skin. I began to dress more glamorously than before, taking my time to do my hair and apply my makeup. I went to where Orpheus was while dressed like this and invited him to tea and for walks. I actively interacted with him when he no longer visited my room. When Orpheus was in the mansion, I persistently followed him, when he wasn¡¯t, I would act like Countess Rosenstein and play to my heart¡¯s content, waste money and go to the gambling house. ¡°You¡¯re gorgeous, Madam.¡± I took Claire¡¯s words as the signal and looked into the mirror. Reflected was not the usual plain and gloomy Ophelia, but a beautifully dressed-up lady. I was dressed in a light blue and dark navy striped dress with a navy ribbon around my waist; on my ears were diamond earrings. My pale skin and lips looked better thanks to makeup, and even if someone just looked at my face, it was like I had transformed into a completely different person compared to when I wasn¡¯t wearing makeup. ¡°Amazing, Claire. I always think this, but you¡¯re amazing.¡± When I applauded Claire for her incredible makeup skills, she blushed and smiled. She looked so cute that it made me want to hug her. ¡°No way¡­ Madam is a beautiful person, so you look good in whatever you wear.¡± ¡°No, you¡¯re wrong. It¡¯s because your skills are amazing.¡± Claire is an excellent maid. She¡¯s usually careful and fast with her typical job too, but her hair and makeup techniques, as well as fashion taste, are also outstanding. She didn¡¯t even have to take an hour. In a short time, she could transform me into Countess Rosenstein who wouldn¡¯t feel ashamed no matter where I go. She was also good at acting and could perform a great act of a young girl who is frightened and weak against her selfish mistress. Her airheadedness is also cute, and she was a capable person who was too good for me. When I praised her without holding back, her face went red like an apple in an instant, and she ran away, ¡°I¡¯ll go get the gloves!¡± She¡¯s shy as always. Smiling at the short girl rustling around the closet, I turned to the mirror again and confirmed if there were any imperfections. I was dressed-up even though I wasn¡¯t going out, but it¡¯s just right for Countess Rosenstein. Because she loves gorgeous dresses and always overly dresses herself up. ¡°Madam, is this one alright?¡± I nodded and put on the white lace gloves that Claire had gotten me. I turned around on the spot and asked Claire, ¡°How do I look?¡± ¡°If I were a man¡­¡± ¡°Eh?¡± Claire clenched her apron with both hands and looked up at me with a sad and vexing expression. What the hell is wrong? I wondered suspiciously, and she continued, ¡°If I were a man¡­¡± ¡°I¡¯d take Madam and run away to a foreign country.¡± I was surprised by the remark that reminded me of Viscount Barbara who eloped to a foreign country because of his affair, and stuttered, ¡°Wh-what do you mean?¡± ¡°It means you¡¯re attractive. You¡¯re beautiful, hardworking, brave, wholeheartedly¡­ Even if you have a lover, I would definitely love you and will never make you sad. I¡¯ll take care of you like you¡¯re an expensive doll. I will protect you with my life. If Madam had married another man, then he would probably think the same as me. Last requests don¡¯t matter. That¡¯s why Master is weird. I¡¯ll be clear, it¡¯s strange for him not to take good care of you or love you. And, I can¡¯t believe that he hates you when you try this hard.¡± ¡°Cl-Claire, you¡¯re saying too much¡­¡± ¡°It¡¯s the truth! Master isn¡¯t normal! He¡¯s weird! He¡¯s strange!¡± Apparently, she couldn¡¯t forgive Orpheus, who was drawing away, for not refusing me clearly even though I tried to actively interact with him. However, no matter how tolerant one is, anyone would be puzzled if their wife, who had been acting selfishly and arrogant until now, suddenly changed their attitude and snuggles up to them with a coaxing voice. They would probably react like Orpheus. They won¡¯t accept it easily, instead, they would be wary and wonder what their wife was scheming. After all, his wife is that notorious Countess Rosenstein. He can¡¯t let his guard down. More importantly, I was more troubled over the fact that he didn¡¯t hate it. ¡°I think Orpheus¡¯s reactions are normal. He doesn¡¯t know the situation as you do.¡± ¡°But¡­!¡± ¡°Now, now, calm down. Come on, take a deep breath.¡± It took a lot of effort to pacify Claire who was so angry from talking that her eyes had glazed over. I can understand how she feels, but I warned her that servants should understand their position and gently patted her head. ¡°Claire. I¡¯m fine. You and Claude are on my side. I don¡¯t care what happens.¡± ¡°Madam¡­¡± ¡°I have to go soon. I don¡¯t have much time because an auditor associate is coming by at night. Now, Claire. Cheer up and greet me with your usual cute smile when I get back.¡± ¡°Uoah¡­ Understood. If Madam says so.¡± I patted Claire¡¯s head again and smiled, ¡°I¡¯m leaving.¡± Claire bowed politely, ¡°Take care.¡± I felt like her cute voice had given me a push on my back and was able to leave the room with a much more positive attitude than usual. Down the stairs, I headed to the study on the first floor, ¨D¨D¨D Orpheus¡¯s workroom. Today as well, I shadowed the busy Orpheus, and flirted with him to get him to hate me. ¡°How do you do, Orpheus! How are you getting on with your work?¡± I slammed the door open and smiled at Juris, who was looking at me in surprise and at Orpheus, who had frozen with a feather pen in his hand. ¡°You look as busy as always. There¡¯s a crease between your eyebrows, Orpheus. You look scary.¡± ¡°Ophelia¡­¡± ¡°I¡¯m sure you¡¯re working too hard. You¡¯re a diligent worker. Why don¡¯t you take a break? Look, it¡¯s such a nice day out today. Let¡¯s go for a walk. It¡¯s a nice change of pace.¡± When I made a rude entrance, put my hands on the ebony desk stacked with documents and drew closer to Orpheus, he glanced at me once before immediately lowering his gaze and sighing. His expression didn¡¯t change, but he said as if he was fed up, ¡°Again?¡± ¡°I¡¯m happy for the invitation, but I¡¯m in the middle of work. There are a few things I have to finish by today. I¡¯m sorry, but today¡¯s¡­¡± ¡°Oh my, then I¡¯ll wait until you¡¯re finished.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know how long it¡¯ll take me.¡± Orpheus acted the same even though the swelling on my cheek has faded. Does he still feel bad for me, or is he trying to keep things peaceful by taking a step back to continue this marriage? His lips twitched sometimes, but he hid his confusion and kept talking to his suspicious wife. ¡°It¡¯s only that much. Then, I¡¯ll help you. I can do simple settlements and calculate balances. Juris, hand me some documents and prepare me a chair. Put it next to Orpheus.¡± When I took my gloves off and approached Juris, he looked at Orpheus in silence to see his decision. Orpheus opened his mouth as if to say something, but I raised a hand and puffed out my chest, ¡°Don¡¯t worry.¡± ¡°I helped you almost every day when we were newlyweds, didn¡¯t I? And, sitting around and doing nothing doesn¡¯t suit me.¡± ¡°But, Madam¡­¡± ¡°You¡¯re wasting time. Hurry up.¡± When documents were taken from a corner of Orpheus¡¯s desk, and space was made, Juris quickly carried a chair over, and I sat down calmly. Orpheus looked at me and gave me a bunch of documents and a stamp as if he had given up because I wouldn¡¯t let him have his way, ¡°Stamp these.¡± ¡°Read through the content and tell me if there¡¯s anything that bothers you.¡± ¡°Understood.¡± I ignored Juris¡¯s gaze that looked like he wanted to say something and read the documents. My purpose is to take a walk with Orpheus alone, not to rummage around in this place. I questioned Orpheus about complaints and requests from the fief citizens and Juris about mansion management, and seriously did my work, unlike what Countess Rosenstein would do. I reread the documents many times to make sure I hadn¡¯t misread anything and asked many questions until I understood what I had asked. When I stamped all the documents that he had given me and piled them up neatly near me, I demanded my next job, ¡°Anything else?¡± ¡°No, that¡¯s enough. Thanks.¡± ¡°That¡¯s enough? I only did this much. There¡¯s still a lot left, isn¡¯t there?¡± ¡°I appreciate your feelings, but you¡¯ve been struggling with those documents for over an hour. You should take a little break.¡± ¡°An hour, you say?¡± ¨D¨D¨D Wasn¡¯t it just 10 minutes? I looked around in amazement, saw the sun was tilting towards evening from outside the window and realised that Orpheus hadn¡¯t been lying. Apparently, I forgot about the time because I was too focused. However, an hour wasn¡¯t a big deal, and I was focused. ¡°I¡¯m still alright. Now, give me more. If not, then we won¡¯t be able to go on a walk.¡± ¡°If you want to go for a walk that much, then how about going alone?¡± ¡°No! I want to go with you! I want to spend time with you! I¡¯ll do anything to achieve this, so give me more documents quickly! Now!¡± Orpheus, who was about to stamp a document, stopped moving and went silent. He remained like that for a long time but finally pressed the stamp feebly onto the document. He awkwardly lifted his face, and I could almost hear a creaking sound. ¡°Juris.¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Sorry, but I¡¯ll go outside for a bit. I¡¯ll be back in 30 minutes.¡± ¡°But, you¡¯re still in the middle of your work?¡± ¡°It¡¯ll work out somehow. No, I¡¯ll finish it somehow. ¨D¨D¨D Ophelia, let¡¯s go.¡± Orpheus finally got up from his chair, probably because he couldn¡¯t work while being in the same room as me. He probably wanted to drive me away by granting my wish instead of shouting at me endlessly. I shouted joyfully in my mind and smiled complacently while standing up. ¡°I¡¯m happy, Orpheus. You¡¯re finally going to take a walk with me.¡± After I wore my lace gloves and swept away my annoying bangs, I clung to his arm even though he hadn¡¯t offered it to me. I clung to him instead of linking arms elegantly with one hand. ¡°Ophelia.¡± ¡°Fufu, let¡¯s go.¡± Taking this opportunity, I tried to push my cheeks against him, but he must have been disgusted because he wanted to push me away with his free hand. Then, I clung onto him tightly, and he put his hand down without saying anything, probably because he remembered that I would stick to him again once he separates himself from me. ¨D¨D¨D Alright. I pulled Orpheus¡¯s arm and went out into the corridor. I walked triumphantly to the front door while passing servants who looked at us with mixed feelings. It isn¡¯t painful to put on a believable expression when I try to flirt with Orpheus because I was used to it now. I felt nothing. At first, I felt like my stomach was churning, but now I can even snuggle close to him. Everything is thanks to Orpheus¡¯s questionable response. It seemed like Orpheus couldn¡¯t forgive me even if he wasn¡¯t going to break up with me probably because I¡¯ve been playing a bad wife until now. He seemed uncomfortable when I acted overly friendly and was walking with a sullen expression on his face. Even though he saved me from those harsh days, I betrayed him, led a dissipated life, even got a lover, and didn¡¯t change no matter how much rebuked me. Or so he thought, but I completely changed after my father¡¯s visit and tried to get close to him. However, I was only acting overly-sweet in front of Orpheus, and I still continued my bad wife performance from before. So, it¡¯s natural for him to look sour. If I weren¡¯t a woman, then he would have grabbed my collar and shook me a long time ago. ¡°What¡¯re you thinking?!¡± He would ask. However, it¡¯s not over yet. I will make him more frustrated and uncomfortable. ¨D¨D¨D Until he can¡¯t take it anymore and explodes. We walked out the front door and went down the stone stairs. I pretended to stagger, shrieked cutely and tried to hug Orpheus. If he avoids me, then I would roll down and break a bone or two, but he¡¯s a gentleman, so he won¡¯t. He caught me and asked worriedly, ¡°Are you alright?¡± I blushed like a girl who had fallen in love for the first time while admiring his glistening blue eyes. ¡°Why should I do? It looks like I¡¯ve hurt my foot¡­¡± Of course, it¡¯s a lie. It doesn¡¯t hurt. I don¡¯t run because I can¡¯t, but I¡¯m fine enough to run with all my might. ¡°I can¡¯t walk unless you support me. Orpheus, please don¡¯t let go of my hand. Hold on to it like this.¡± ¡°You shouldn¡¯t force yourself to walk. Let¡¯s go back and cool it down.¡± ¡°It¡¯ll be alright if you support me. You finally made time for this, so I¡¯d like to take a walk.¡± ¡°What if it gets worse?¡± ¡°It only hurts a little bit. Don¡¯t worry. Please? Support me.¡± Orpheus tried to look for the chance to let go of my hand, probably because he hated me clinging to him. But he can¡¯t do that if I lie and say my foot hurts. He would feel uncomfortable because he has to support me as we walk. Also, there was a pleasant wind because it was nearly evening, but the temperature in early summer wasn¡¯t suitable for snuggling up to each other. Being made to join a wife, who he didn¡¯t like, for a walk during a busy time as she forces a sweet expression on him and having an uncomfortably hot embrace is really the worst. He would probably hate me more than he does now, right? ¡°Never let go.¡± I brought my slender hand to his face and looked up at him. Orpheus widened his eyes and immediately averted his gaze. It was hard to see his expression since he was facing sideways, but I didn¡¯t miss the frown that gracefully appeared on his face. ¨D¨D¨D He really seems to hate it. I made a fist in my mind, not because I was sad, but because I was happy. I want him to hate me more. I want him to get irritated. I want him to loathe me. ¨D¨D¨D Then, divorce me. I ruthlessly suppressed the feelings that wanted to overflow because of his nostalgic perfume and leaned coquettishly against him. I persuaded myself that I couldn¡¯t feel him or his warmth. I shook off my sentiments. ¡°Say, Orpheus. Walk more slowly.¡± ¡°Does it hurt? Then¡­¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine. It¡¯s fine even if it hurts. I want to walk with you like this.¡± Orpheus nodded silently and slowed down. He remained expressionless as we walked around the garden, but he let me hold his right arm until the end. Chapter 22 - The Servants Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles After about half a month of swelling on my cheeks had gone down and the yellowish bruises disappeared. The sunlight became stronger, the temperature rose, and more greenery grew in the garden. My way of doing things didn¡¯t go as Claude feared it would and was generally going well. Orpheus was puzzled that his wife was following him like a fly. He would frown when I touched his body, and his handsome face would cloud over every time he heard vulgar and worthless scandals. I don¡¯t know if he disliked women who flirted with him because they were blinded by his beauty like I had heard in the gambling house, but at least he didn¡¯t like my coquetry approach. If I hadn¡¯t been a woman, if I hadn¡¯t been his wife, and if he hadn¡¯t sympathised with me, ¨D¨D¨D he would probably refuse me with a colder and scornful expression, or he would ignore my presence as if I weren¡¯t even there. However, Orpheus didn¡¯t do that. I repeatedly invited him to tea and on walks as if I was sneering at him, and even though he refused so much, I had dinner with him, and sat in the study and made him let me help him with work. I saw him off when he went out and quickly rushed to greet him when he returned. I followed him to his room and kicked out the servants who were trying to help him change and helped him change myself. Orpheus probably thought of me as a nuisance. His wife, who he didn¡¯t want to see, continued to pursue him, and she would meddle in things she didn¡¯t need to. ¡°That¡¯s enough,¡± he was probably fed up with it a lot. ¨D¨D¨D But, it¡¯s still not enough. Orpheus endured. He was patient. I still haven¡¯t done enough. I don¡¯t feel like I¡¯m going too far, and I feel sorry for Orpheus¡¯s mentality, but I¡¯m going to continue this silly interaction forever until he raises his voice and talks about divorce. I saw Orpheus off to work as he went to the town hall and walked down the corridor on the first floor that leads to the servants¡¯ workplace, then I suddenly heard pleasant laughter from out of nowhere. The laughter came from the kitchen where the door was opened, and when I peeked inside, I saw four servants gathered together and chatting noisily. I thought they were working, but only the large chef and a young maid were moving their hands, the other girls were probably having lunch since they were standing around eating bread that was stuffed with fillings. ¡°I think the place where your sister works is normal¡­¡± The oldest maid had already finished her lunch, and she said this while drinking tea. ¡°She¡¯s no match for our Madam. I¡¯ve worked at many mansions, and I know that every noble is selfish and does what they want, but I¡¯ve never met anyone as horrible as her.¡± I quickly retracted my face from the door and put my ears against the wall next to the entrance. ¡°Why did Master marry such a woman? I wish he had married Diana-sama instead of selling favour to a countryside noble. They would have had a child right away and would be able to live happily by now.¡± ¡°All the servants were against it. I can¡¯t believe that he would choose that lady and deny his relationship with Diana-sama. I think it¡¯s fine even if she¡¯s blind and has lost her parents as long as there¡¯s love.¡± ¡°I think so too. Do nobles care about appearances that much?¡± ¡°I wonder. If he cared about appearances, then I think he would have divorced Madam a long time ago and kicked her out.¡± ¡°Hmm. What is Master thinking? I don¡¯t understand him at all.¡± The servants don¡¯t know the real reason why Orpheus didn¡¯t choose Diana. They gossip that it would look bad if he married Diana, who was blind and had no family to back her up, so he lent money to Marquis Lagerfeld and received his daughter in return. It was such a funny reason because even if the husband keeps his lover by his side, the wife can¡¯t complain since her position is weak. Even though Orpheus didn¡¯t do such a thing, the servants, who supported Diana¡¯s relationship with him, probably couldn¡¯t help but get angry and blame him. Furthermore, the bride, who he had brought with money, had suddenly changed within half a year. She became a selfish and prideful woman, so I can understand why they want to complain. ¡°But she¡¯ll be going back to her parent¡¯s home soon, right?¡± A clear voice, probably from the young maid who was moving her hand, said. I was so surprised that I almost jumped, and I held my chest to calm my beating heart. ¡°I heard that Madam¡¯s father came to bring her home a while ago.¡± I was so nervous that I gulped and almost collapsed when I heard this. Hope sprung from my chest because Orpheus might finally divorce me at last, but this was merely gossip since it was coming from the mouth of the maids. ¡°Unfortunately, it doesn¡¯t seem like he¡¯ll divorce her. After all, he¡¯s having the Marquis cut off any relations he has with Madam in exchange for not paying back the money that Master has loaned him. Master really has brought Madam with money.¡± ¡°Huh? Really?¡± ¡°Rita, you didn¡¯t know this?¡± ¡°Nope, I didn¡¯t. I thought Madam was getting along well with Master because she didn¡¯t want to get divorced.¡± ¡°Oh, that.¡± I didn¡¯t just hear one sigh, but many. The servants also seemed to have noticed the peculiarities in my recent behaviour. ¡°But, wouldn¡¯t the reason be something like that? If she gets kicked out, then she wouldn¡¯t have anywhere to go, right? Her lover is a painter who is living in a rented apartment, and he can¡¯t keep his livelihood if he doesn¡¯t have Madam¡¯s support. She¡¯s supporting him with master¡¯s money, isn¡¯t she? She won¡¯t be able to live in luxury, and she¡¯ll be troubled if she gets kicked out, so she¡¯s trying to win master¡¯s favour.¡± I¡¯m flirting with him because I don¡¯t want to be kicked out, that¡¯s what they think¡­ I see. So, it could be interpreted like that. Orpheus might also believe this, and that¡¯s why he¡¯s so confused. ¡°It¡¯s her own fault, isn¡¯t it? She should have just behaved like a good wife from the start.¡± ¡°She did behave herself at first, but she couldn¡¯t keep it up for more than six months.¡± ¡°I feel sorry for Claire and Renee. They¡¯re always having such a horrible time.¡± ¡°Claire and Renee are good at putting up with her.¡± I smiled when I heard the servants badmouth me. Juris had found out that everything I had done had been an act, but the other servants still believe in my lies. I was worried that my act wasn¡¯t enough, but I was worried for no reason. And, Claire was still acting like a pitiful maid who was frightened of her selfish mistress. I was satisfied that the Rosenstein House servants still hated me and released my back from the wall to return to my room. Then, I heard footsteps approaching, so I quickly walked down the corridor. The footsteps belonged to Juris and Elza, the head maid, and they were walking side by side as if they were blocking my way. Judging from their expressions, they had seen that I was eavesdropping on the servants in the kitchen. I made an effort to remain calm and walked past them from the side as they bowed and made way for me. Their gazes that pierced at the back of my head stated that they wanted to say something to me, but I quickly went up the stairs and walked towards my room. ¡°Madam,¡± the voice came when I reached where the portraits of the Rosenstein family were displayed. I glanced at the beautiful woman with black hair who was the wife of one of the former heads of the family and turned around. It was Juris who should have been with Elza. He stood there with a puzzled and troubled expression, just like the one Orpheus made when I flirted with him. I was going to reply curtly like I usually do, but then I considered that he might have a reason to chase after me and stop me, so I looked around to confirm that no one was nearby. ¡°What is it?¡± Juris averted his gaze awkwardly as he stood in front of me. He looked like he was hesitating, and then he finally spoke, ¡°I¡¯m sorry. It¡¯s all my fault that the servants aren¡¯t educated properly. We usually don¡¯t allow them to gossip during work hours, but¡­ no, excuses aren¡¯t needed. I¡¯m sorry for making you feel uncomfortable.¡± I was surprised that he had chased after me just to say this. Juris showed concern for me at random times ever since he confessed his feelings for Diana on that day. He had remained silent even though he knew my real motives because of his feelings for Diana, and he might have regretted that he continued to act coldly towards me. I want him to remain the same cold Juris. ¡°At least they should have closed the door. They probably left it open to let the cool wind in, but you never know who might be listening in. But I am relieved to hear that my acting is going well thanks to them.¡± ¡°¡­ Has it been bothering you this whole time?¡± Juris raised his face. He made sure no one was around again, and spoke, ¡°You still plan on continuing this. I thought you might have changed your mind when I saw you trying to get close to Orpheus-sama¡­ but, you¡¯re still going out like you used to, and I¡¯m curious about what your intentions are.¡± ¡°You¡¯ve been watching me anxiously.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry for doing something unscrupulous.¡± ¡°No, it¡¯s fine. As long as Orpheus doesn¡¯t notice you acting like this¡­ Like you said, I still plan on continuing. But it seems like it¡¯ll take a lot of time with the way things were going, so I thought I¡¯ll change my plans a little. Orpheus hates it when women flirt with him, right?¡± ¡°That¡¯s¡­ Orpheus-sama certainly doesn¡¯t like women who make eyes at him¡­ but, I don¡¯t think that applies to you, Madam.¡± ¡°He seems really troubled, though.¡± ¡°Troubled¡­ he might be¡­¡± Juris looked at the air, and then at me as if he was trying to read my expression. ¡°I wonder if it¡¯s puzzled is the right word to use.¡± ¡°Whether to divorce me because he¡¯s had enough of my selfishness or to obey his father¡¯s last request. Is that what he¡¯s puzzled over?¡± ¡°No, that¡¯s not it¡­¡± He¡¯s being very inarticulate. I tilted my head and waited for him to continue, but he continued to look around again, then he stared at a portrait. That was a portrait of me which had been painted not long after I married into this house. I was wearing a white dress wedding dress, and my hair was tied up and draped upon one side of my chest. I had a diamond ring on my left ring finger ¨D¨D¨D it was the first ring that Orpheus had ever given me ¨D¨D¨D, and I had a graceful smile on my face. Juris cast his eyes down sadly at the horribly beautified portrait and whispered in a small voice that I could finally hear, ¡°Won¡¯t you stop?¡± ¡°What?¡± I asked in return, and Juris looked up as if he had made a decision. ¡°Orpheus-sama¡¯s will is firm. Stop behaving like this and tell him everything. Start over from the beginning.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Is he still saying this? I swallowed the sigh that nearly escaped from my mouth and stared straight at Juris. ¡°The people who will start over are not Orpheus and I, it¡¯s Orpheus and Diana¡­ Why did you say something like that? You want to make Diana happy, don¡¯t you?¡± ¡°What will happen to you if you keep on doing this?!¡± Juris screamed. He was so loud that his voice echoed in the corridor. ¡°What will you do after you get divorced and kicked out from this mansion?! Are you going to the painter who you don¡¯t even love and live a poor life?!¡± I was stunned that the cool butler had lost his composure and called out his name. Juris came back to his senses and shut his mouth. Then, he took a few deep breaths and said, ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± He continued to breathe in and out to control his emotions and clenched his fist tightly. ¡°You¡¯re already suffering so much. If you break up with the man you love so much that you¡¯re willing to give up everything for him, and that man remarries another woman, then you¡¯ll be suffering even more.¡± ¨D¨D¨D No, I won¡¯t. Orpheus¡¯s happiness is my happiness. Was what I thought, but I silently listened to Juris. ¡°You don¡¯t need to be the scapegoat. You didn¡¯t do anything wrong. We¡¯re the ones to blame. It¡¯s Orpheus¡¯s fault for not caring for you, and Diana¡¯s fault for staying in this mansion and saying unreasonable things, and my fault for using your feelings for my own selfish gains. You¡¯ve been living a hard life until now. You should be happier than anyone else. And yet¡­¡± ¡°You¡¯re wrong.¡± I couldn¡¯t keep silent anymore and denied everything. He¡¯s wrong. It¡¯s not like that. You guys did nothing wrong. ¡°It¡¯s my fault. I fell in love with someone I shouldn¡¯t. I had already accepted that I would be a decorated wife and that we would live separate lives, but I fell in love with him. I dug my own grave. Stupidly so.¡± ¡°You didn¡¯t do anything wrong. Orpheus loves you,¡± Juris said quietly. He looked really lonely and sad. ¡°Orpheus doesn¡¯t love Diana. Orpheus loves you. He loves you. His way of showing his love is clumsy, and he makes a lot of mistakes, but he still loves you. He can¡¯t let you go no matter what.¡± ¡°You¡¯re lying.¡± Orpheus loves Diana. Only her. I am the woman who he took in so that he could fulfil the previous head¡¯s last request, and he only pities me. He doesn¡¯t consider me as a friend or love me like family. He felt pity towards me since I was like him. ¡°Juris, you¡¯re like Orpheus. You pity me. Pity, and in your case, guilt as well? You pity me, and your conscience is pricking at you, that¡¯s why you¡¯re trying to make me stop.¡± ¡°You¡¯re wrong. It¡¯s not like that. Orpheus really loves you¡­¡± ¡°He doesn¡¯t love me.¡± Juris tried to persuade me in a silly way, and I glared at him with hatred. ¡°That man doesn¡¯t love me. He smiles so gently in front of Diana, but he doesn¡¯t do the same when he¡¯s in front of me. He always looks at me with cold eyes. It¡¯s always been this way ever since we first met.¡± ¡°You¡¯re misunderstanding things greatly. He¡¯s not looking at you with cold eyes. It¡¯s not that simple, his gaze is more intense and full of yearning¡­¡± ¡°He¡¯s never said, ¡®I love you¡¯.¡± As soon as I finished saying that, pain rushed through my body as if I was being slashed by a sharp blade, and I let out a low groan. ¨D¨D¨D Would you believe him if he told you he loved you? I shook my head and denied it. I¡¯ve already seen that smile, so I wouldn¡¯t believe him no matter how much he declares his love. The smile he had directed at Diana told me everything that was in his heart. ¡°This is pointless. This conversation is pointless,¡± I said to end this conversation. ¡°I¡¯ve heard enough. Juris, I don¡¯t want anything from you anymore. I won¡¯t even ask you to help me. Just shut up and watch.¡± ¡°Ophelia-sama, you¡­¡± ¡°You don¡¯t have to worry about me either. You only have to think about Diana¡¯s happiness as you have been¡­ I won¡¯t allow you to use my feelings and give up halfway.¡± Juris turned pale at the words which almost sounded like a curse. He tightened his trembling lips and looked down. I turned around in silence and never looked back. When I returned to my room, I opened the closet and looked for my jewellery box. That man¡­ I started selling my dresses and jewellery little by little to turn them into money from the day my father visited. My closet, which had been filled to the brim with barely any space left over until a month ago, was much cleaner now. I told Renee that I was selling the dresses I didn¡¯t need to buy new ones, but even if my jewellery increased, my dresses hadn¡¯t, so she might be getting suspicious soon. I found the jewellery box straight away. I opened the lid, which was delicately crafted from nocturnal luminescence, and jewellery of various colours such as red, blue, green and purple, shone when the light hit them. I took out a small diamond ring out from the box and quietly closed the lid. I felt nostalgic when I saw my own portrait and wanted to wear it for the first time in a long time. I placed the ring on my left ring finger and stared as it glistened silver in the sunlight. ¡ºDo you like it?¡» ¡ºYes, very much! It¡¯s a waste on someone like me.¡» ¡ºThat¡¯s not true. It suits you very much.¡» The first ring that my beloved gave me glistened like that time. I¡¯m sure it¡¯ll continue to remain beautiful in the future. It won¡¯t fade like the memories I had back then and would continue to shine forever. ¡°I love you.¡± ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯ll love you forever. I rubbed the cold gem and smiled as if Orpheus was in front of me. ¡°It¡¯s fine as long as you¡¯re happy. Your happiness is my happiness.¡± I repeated this many times to myself. I closed my eyes and imagined Orpheus¡¯s smile. ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s okay. I¡¯m sure I¡¯ll be fine. I remembered the feeling of Orpheus¡¯s hand as he gently took my hand as if he was touching something important and placed the ring on it. Even if I sell all my other dresses and jewellery, I¡¯ll keep this ring. Chapter 23 - Battle Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles One month after that man¡¯s visit, Orpheus and I still continue our foolish battle. Orpheus was puzzled by his wife who kept following him with a sweet smile and frowned, but he still hadn¡¯t given up, and it seemed like he was challenging the limits of his patience. From his behaviour, I could see his unwavering determination to betray the woman he loved so that he could keep the last request of the man who raised him like a real son, no matter how bothered he was by his wife¡¯s folly. However, he was certainly irritated and unhappy since he looked at me occasionally with a thoughtful gaze and sighed more often. So, I acted more boldly and flirted with him in a more obvious way to make him more irritated and unhappy. I did things he hated the most since he hated women who were charmed by his appearance and winked at him, ¨D¨D¨D by complimenting his handsome face, and pretending to be charmed by his appearance ¨D¨D¨D, but he didn¡¯t doubt my behaviour, and even said the word ¡®love¡¯. ¡ºI love you. That¡¯s why I can¡¯t let you leave. I want to be with you forever.¡»The moment I had said that his face was a sight to behold. He opened his eyes so wide that it looked like his blue eyes would fall out of their sockets, his mouth was gaping open, and his expression looked as if he had just seen a strange creature appear right before his eyes. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m sure he¡¯s nearly at his limits. It would be alright to continue my attacks and drive him into a corner, but I wanted to know if it was possible to create an opportunity to make him explode with all his frustrations and unhappiness since I wanted him to divorce me as soon as possible. ¨D¨D¨D Long eyelashes. I suddenly thought as I sat down on a chair across from him and rested my chin on my hands while he was reading a book. Orpheus¡¯s eyelashes are long. They were long enough to cast a shadow on his eyes and would be the envy of ladies who made their eyes pop out with make-up. Women would envy his long and thick eyelashes. Orpheus is handsome today as well. Blue eyes like gems, a straight and high nose, and slightly red lips. He didn¡¯t have the beauty of a woman. He had the beauty of a man, thick bone structures, and finely chiselled features. His eyes which were reading the text were full of sorrow and looked mysterious and fascinating. But that was only a part of him, not all of him. His appearance is beautiful and worthy of admiration, but appearances aren¡¯t that important to me. It doesn¡¯t matter whether he¡¯s handsome or not. What I love about him is his smile, his soul. No matter how much the things that come attached to that change, my feelings for him will never change. So, I don¡¯t really want to tell him. These worthless words that sound as if I¡¯m only looking at him superficially aren¡¯t my true feelings. ¡°You¡¯re very handsome.¡± His blue eyes, which had been reading, looked at me. ¡°It¡¯s like you¡¯re a piece of art. You¡¯re really handsome and beautiful. It feels like I¡¯m going to swoon just from looking at it,¡± I said and smiled. If I can make something of his my own¡­ I smiled sweetly at him, a smile full of the desire to monopolise him, which he hated. ¡°I like it. ¨D¨D¨D Your face, that is.¡± Orpheus looked at me expressionlessly as he turned the page, but he looked like he was smiling a little, then he looked troubled and extremely lonely. ¡°It¡¯s yours.¡± You can do what you like with it, was what it felt like he had said. It was as if he was declaring this to my recent strange behaviour, and my smile twitched. It would have been better if he told me to stop because it was unpleasant. However, even if his expressions changed, he rarely rejected me with words. Perhaps he was afraid that his pent up anger would explode if he were to put it into words. ¡°This face and this body, they¡¯re all yours. Because you are my wife, my spouse.¡± ¡°If that¡¯s true¡­¡± I quickly shut my mouth because I nearly revealed my true feelings. Orpheus tilted his head in curiosity, and asked, ¡°If that¡¯s true¡­?¡± ¡°No, it¡¯s nothing.¡± I pretended that I hadn¡¯t said anything with a smile. I can¡¯t say it. ¡®If that¡¯s true, then how wonderful that would be,¡¯ I won¡¯t say it even if my mouth split apart. I will give everything to Orpheus, and he will give everything to me. If this were true, then we would love each other deeply, and our bonds will be inseparable. I am a fool who can never be saved because I tried to find hope in this assumption while destroying the relationship between us. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m tired. Recently, I¡¯ve suddenly come to my senses. I¡¯m tired. I¡¯m tired of this foolish attack, of the days that are wearing me down, and of the cold gaze directed at me from the person I love. Once I realised this fact, I felt terribly empty. ¨D¨D¨D What am I doing? I played the bad wife because I wanted to be hated by the person I loved, then I turned around and flirted with him with a sweet smile on my face. By doing so, I was trying to make him hate me more. Aren¡¯t I like a clown who appears in comedies? Clowns make people laugh with funny remarks and actions. However, I¡¯m serious. I¡¯m acting with the intention of throwing everything away. I was aware of everything. I even made Orpheus unhappy, and in the end, I¡¯ll step off the stage a lonely person. I thought this was the only way to prove my love for him because I have nothing and could give him nothing. For Orpheus, I could have endured any pain. I was not supposed to feel anything if I repeated this every day and let it become a habit. ¨D¨D¨D And yet, why? Why am I so tired? I¡¯ll be happy if Orpheus is happy, I¡¯ll be satisfied if Orpheus is smiling, but why do I feel so empty and miserable sometimes? ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s because I¡¯m tired. There are no other reasons. I¡¯m just tired. I¡¯m only feeling gloomy because I¡¯m tired. There are no other reasons. ¨D¨D¨D Let¡¯s end this quickly. I want to make Orpheus happy. But I¡¯m tired. Orpheus is probably tired as well. I want him to release me and free him. The only way to do this is to make him divorce me as quickly as I can, leave this mansion, and close the curtain to my short and horribly painful long days. After a while, Orpheus went to the parlour because a servant had come and informed him that a visitor was here. I was left alone in the room and had nothing to do, so I tried to read the book that Orpheus had been reading, but it was a philosophy book that I had read before, so I went back to my room to get tools to practice embroidery. When I opened the door and went out into the corridor, Elza was standing there with a tray of tea utensils and baked goods, and I raised my voice in surprise, ¡°Elza!¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± Elza quietly bowed her head and apologised for surprising me. Her bow was a model bow of what the servants should do, and she straightened her back when she raised her head again. I was impressed by her serious behaviour. Eliza Muller. The head maid who controls this mansion with Juris and had been serving the Rosenstein House for 30 years making her the oldest servant. She is a middle-aged woman with a stern face and chestnut hair that wasn¡¯t dishevelled at all, and she always looks at her surroundings with a keen gaze. It¡¯s hard to get an impression on her, but she¡¯s more zealous about her work than anyone else and is an excellent manager who educates the other servants strictly, but she also watches over them warmly, and never forgets to give them words of encouragement. Orpheus also acknowledges her work and had great faith in her. He wasn¡¯t blessed with a mother, so Elza might be like a mother to him with her warm and strict support. Perhaps because of that, the relationship between Elza and I started off rocky. Elza is on Diana¡¯s side, and she thinks that the right partner for Orpheus is Diana, so our relationship turned sour. When I was doing my best for this house, Elza¡¯s reaction towards me was colder than Orpheus¡¯s, and every time I met her, she would scold me and tell me the way I was doing things was no good. Since I started acting like a foolish woman¡­ ¡°Master ordered me to prepare tea, but are you going back to your room?¡± She called me from behind even though I had already started walking. I turned back because it was surprising for Orpheus to show consideration towards me. My chest ached, and I pretended I hadn¡¯t felt anything while saying, ¡°I¡¯m going to get some tools to kill time. You can leave it in the room.¡± ¡°In Master¡¯s room?¡± ¡°Yes,¡± I answered in a rude tone and began walking to my room. The relationship between Elza and I became much colder and reserved when I began acting like a foolish woman. Elza, like Juris, would give me advice at the beginning, and tried to improve my behaviour, but then she gave up on me and stopped. Even if we met like this, she only says what she has to me, and never tells me to stop going out or stop wasting money. She stays silent and stares at me with criticism. She was treating me with great caution like the other servants. ¡°Pitiful,¡± the words which had been whispered echoed well in the quiet corridor where only footsteps could be heard. At the same time, I heard a sigh. ¨D¨D¨D Is she pitying Orpheus? Elza probably didn¡¯t like my strange behaviour like the other servants. She might feel bad for Orpheus because I¡¯ll be sticking to him again once the visitor returns and might have just blabbed that out. It might have been better for me to pretend I hadn¡¯t heard her and left, but she had clearly whispered that, so I had no choice but to reply to her, ¡°What is?¡± I had only stopped and hadn¡¯t turned around, so I don¡¯t know what kind of expression Eliza was making. She kept silent, but eventually let out another sigh. ¡°It¡¯s nothing,¡± she said before going into Orpheus¡¯s room. I didn¡¯t want to come face-to-face with her again, so I spent a lot of time in my room before returning to Orpheus¡¯s room. Eliza wasn¡¯t there, and tea was prepared on the table, but I couldn¡¯t bring myself to touch it until Orpheus returned. I went to the gambling house yesterday and drank a lot of wine before coming back the following day. The next day, I got up in the afternoon, had Renee help me change, and spent time reading a book in my room. It was a dry, hot summer afternoon, but the sky was beautiful and clear. The Rosenstein mansion had a lot of greenery, so the wind coming in through the opened windows was nice, and the rooms weren¡¯t hot. The inside of the mansion was quiet, and there were no harsh noises, so I was able to concentrate on reading. Right now, I was reading a long novel that had many sequels, but I had finished the first volume too fast, and closed the thick cover with a thump. I engrossed myself in the emotions I felt for a while, but I couldn¡¯t stand it anymore because I was interested in the sequel and headed to the library. I found the book I wanted right away. I also took other books that interested me and went up the spiral staircase in the entrance hall in a happy mood. Then, I saw that the door on the last room on the second floor, Diana¡¯s room, was opened, and she came out with her arms linked around a maid¡¯s. She¡¯s probably going for a walk. She was wearing a hat and a long-sleeved dress so she wouldn¡¯t get sunburnt. I flinched for a second. I didn¡¯t know if I should quickly rush back to the library or calmly pass her. If I pass her, then Diana would speak to me, and I would reply back in disdain. I¡¯m already worn out, so I don¡¯t want to feel bitter at seeing her hurt expression. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, this is no good. If I continue this way, then it¡¯ll be no good. I became extremely timid. I¡¯m afraid of hurting others. I was shaken even though I decided that I would do anything for Orpheus, even crawl in mud. If I continue this way, then it¡¯s no good. ¡ºOrpheus loves you.¡» It¡¯s because Juris had said those words. I became shaken ever since he¡¯d said those words and became weird. Even though I didn¡¯t believe those words and knew it was impossible, but still I¡­ ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s okay. Shake off the sentiments and look forward. I¡¯m not tired. I can do anything for Orpheus. I¡¯ll do it. Diana¡¯s maid noticed me and whispered to her. Then, Diana stepped forward and tried to find me with her eyes which couldn¡¯t see. Her earnest expression struck a chord in my heart and tightened it, but I gazed at her coldly. ¡°Hello, Ophelia.¡± Diana was pulled by the maid and walked towards me, then she said, ¡°So, you were here? That¡¯s good. I was just about to visit your room.¡± ¡°Hello Diana. What did you need?¡± I replied in a cold tone, and Diana¡¯s bright smile stiffened, and she looked down awkwardly. ¡°I wanted to talk to you.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t have anything to talk to you about.¡± ¡°You might not, but I have. I really wanted to talk to you.¡± ¡°Then, I¡¯ll listen. Go on,¡± I said, and the maid pulled on Diana¡¯s hand, stepped out in front of her and looked at me in protest. I ignored her and immediately looked at her with an expression that stated I wanted to leave as quickly as possible. ¡°I want to go back to my room. Quickly tell me what you have to say. You¡¯re just going to say stupid things like ¡®You¡¯re misunderstanding the relationship between Orpheus and I,¡¯ or ¡®Please get along with him¡¯, right? But well, I¡¯ll listen to what you have to say, so keep it short.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry. It¡¯s hard to say here. The other servants might hear us¡­ Won¡¯t you walk around the garden with me and talk like we used to? You liked to take walks, didn¡¯t you? You would hold my hand and tell me about the weather, how beautiful the flowers were as they bloomed, and what the water fountain looked like for the day. We had tea together, and talked about the latest trends, about scandals you¡¯ve heard and¡­¡± ¡°If you want to reminisce, then do so with your kind cousin.¡± Diana trembled as if she had been struck with thunder and pursed her lips. She was speechless and frozen in place, but the maid called her name as if to encourage her. She looked as if she was going to cry and nodded with an expression that stated she had made a heart-breaking decision. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Ophelia.¡± ¡°What for?¡± ¡°I¡¯ve hurt you. You¡¯ve denied this many times, but I¡¯m the reason why you became like that¡­¡± ¡°Ophelia. Diana,¡± at that time, someone called us from the first floor. I looked down the stairs and saw Orpheus. He was frowning anxiously and had a dangerous aura about him. ¡°What are you two doing?¡± Don¡¯t worry, because we¡¯re not doing anything. ¨D¨D¨D I quickly made a smile and opened my mouth to say this, but Diana spoke first. ¡°I¡¯m inviting Ophelia on a walk. I wanted to talk to her.¡± ¡°Hey, Diana¡­¡± ¡°Ophelia. Won¡¯t you listen to what she has to say?¡± It was normal for Orpheus to take Diana¡¯s side, but it was strange for him to say it worryingly. It was like he knew what Diana was going to say to me. ¡°Do you also know what she wants to say?¡± I asked him in a soft voice with a sweet gesture, but Orpheus didn¡¯t answer my question, and just said in a low and calm voice, ¡°Please.¡± His blue eyes were past the point of seriousness and looked desperate. I wondered why Orpheus wanted me to hear Diana out so badly. ¡°Please, Ophelia.¡± ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m troubled. It¡¯s strange for Diana to be this persistent. And if Orpheus speaks and looks at me like that, then I can¡¯t refuse even if it¡¯s for Diana. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯ll listen to what she has to say. Perhaps, it might be an important matter which has a significant influence on the relationship between Orpheus and me. ¡°Alright. If you two are going that far. Orpheus, are you coming too?¡± ¡°No, I still have things to do. You two go ahead.¡± ¡°I see. ¨D¨D¨D Diana. I¡¯m going to get my hat, so wait at the bottom of the stairs.¡± I passed Diana and walked to my room. ¡°Thank you, Ophelia,¡± she said to me in relief from behind, but I didn¡¯t look back and continued to glare in front of me as I concentrated on walking. Chapter 24 - Diana’s Confession Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles It was much hotter outside than I had imagined. It was cool when the wind blew, but once the wind died down, my forehead dripped with sweat. The sun had set quite a bit compared to the time when it was high in the air, but it didn¡¯t change the fact that this was summer. I wanted to use a parasol on top of my straw hat because I felt like the scorching sun would burn my skin. ¡°Don¡¯t you regret it?¡± I smiled and asked Diana, and she replied, ¡°Huh?¡± She was smiling, but she must have felt nervous inside since she was gripping my arm tightly. Diana insisted that we talk alone, so I lent her my arm instead of a maid just like I used to. ¡°It¡¯s nice that you invited me for a walk, but it¡¯s hotter than you thought,¡± I said meanly, and Diana shook her head. ¡°That¡¯s not true! I-it is hot, but I¡¯m fine. I like walking,¡± she said, but is she really fine? She must have been worried about getting sunburnt, because she wore a dress with a collar covering her whole neck, and it looked stuffy. Even though the material was thin, and it was a dress designed for summer, the heat would accumulate, and it would get hotter and hotter. Besides, Diana is a thin and delicate lady, and she looked like a fragile young lady. Unlike me, who was strong and didn¡¯t catch a cold even if I took a bath in the middle of winter, she seemed like someone who would faint because of the tiniest things. ¡°I¡¯m not fine, though.¡± ¡°Ah! I, I¡¯m sorry, Ophelia. That¡¯s right. Even if I¡¯m fine, you might not be. I heard that a lot of the roses have bloomed, so I wanted to take a walk with you¡­ But, shall we go talk in a room after all? It¡¯s cooler in the parlour.¡± ¡°Do you really want to walk around in the garden?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t have to. We should talk in a room if you¡¯re hot. I¡¯m always walking around the garden, so I don¡¯t mind if it¡¯s hot, but you¡¯re different. I heard that you¡¯re a thin and delicate beauty, so you might be weak against the strong summer sun¡­¡± ¡°A delicate beauty?¡± Where the heck did she get this wrong information from? It was such a daunting remark that it made me want to question her for an hour. I wasn¡¯t plump, but I wasn¡¯t thin either and I have never looked delicate. In the first place, ¡®delicate¡¯ is appropriate for women like Diana, and wasn¡¯t suited for a woman who was playing a bad wife. Besides, I¡¯m turning 18 this year, so I wasn¡¯t a girl, and I wasn¡¯t a beauty either. ¡°Who said that?¡± ¡°Who? Orpheus did. That¡¯s what he told me when I asked him what kind of person you were. He said you are a thin and delicate beauty.¡± ¡°¡­ I see. That¡¯s a downright lie, so you should forget what he said.¡± ¡°Huh?¡± It seemed like Orpheus had been the one who had told her this. Why the hell did he tell his lover such outrageous nonsense? I¡¯ll question him about it when we divorce. My stomach felt like it was stirring around. If Diana said she is fine, then I¡¯ll walk while bearing with my discomfort. I made up my mind while wiping sweat off my forehead with my handkerchief. ¡°Ask Orpheus if you want to know more about it. ¨D¨D¨D Then, shall we go? The sun¡¯s pretty strong right now, so tell me if you feel bad. They¡¯ll think it¡¯s my fault if you faint.¡± ¡°But, Ophelia¡­ are you sure?¡± ¡°My opinion doesn¡¯t matter. You wanted to take a walk, right? Let¡¯s go.¡± I pulled Diana¡¯s hand and started walking. We walked down the stone stairs onto the lush lawn, then passed under the tree shades to the rose maze. I looked back at Diana from time to time as she silently followed me to see if my pace was fine with her and to see if she was still feeling well. ¡°Have the roses bloomed?¡± ¡°Yeah. They¡¯re in full bloom. Though some of the petals are shrivelled from the sun.¡± When we reached the rose maze, I took Diana¡¯s hand and let her touch a large rose that was blooming beautifully. It was a bright yellow rose that looked golden when the sun hit it, and it contrasted against Diana¡¯s white fingers. ¡°So? Can you tell?¡± ¡°Yes. It feels the same as when I touch a silk dress. What colour is the rose?¡± ¡°Yellow. A golden yellow.¡± ¡°Yellow¡­ that means ¡®friendship¡¯ in the language of flowers. Or devotion, lovely, hope. ¨D¨D¨D Say, Ophelia. What colour is the sky?¡± I looked up, and the blue sky looked as if it was piercing through. ¡°Dark blue¡­ No, I wonder if it¡¯s a dark aqua. It¡¯s a mixture of your eye colour and Orpheus¡¯s.¡± Diana laughed softly. Her smile seemed like she missed the past and was a delicate smile which looked like it would disappear at any moment. ¡°You¡¯re¨D¨D¨D,¡± she began before stopping. She gently stroked the rose while biting her lips as if she was enduring pain, then a sob escaped from her throat. ¡°Diana?¡± ¡°You didn¡¯t change after all. You haven¡¯t changed at all since then. Your language and attitude have become cold, and sound harsh, but you¡¯re still the same gentle person from back then. I made you suffer so much, so it¡¯s natural for you to hate me, but you¡¯re¨D¨D¨D.¡± The rose petals fluttered down. Diana covered her face with her white hands and walked back while staggering. There was a rose bush right behind her, so she¡¯ll get pricked by their thorns ¨D¨D¨D I quickly reached out and grabbed her. ¡°Diana!¡± I put my arms on her back so that she wouldn¡¯t fall back any further, and she stopped moving. She gently removed her hands from her face and stared at me timidly. Her gaze was actually quite far from where my face was, but she was certainly trying to look at me. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Ophelia. I¡¯m sorry.¡± Diana cried. Tears flowed down her rosy cheeks. ¡°I have someone I like,¡± Diana confessed as the tears continued to flow down. I froze since her confession had been so abrupt and could only gulp as I continued to listen to her. ¡°I lost my parents and was abandoned by my fianc¨¦e. He is the ray of light to me who has lost everything. He is my everything.¡± Her thin, white hands pressed against her chest. Her light blue eyes swayed as if she recalled her loved one who wasn¡¯t here. It swayed like water that was being blown by the wind. ¡°I loved him.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Oh. The whisper that came out with a sigh felt like cold hands gripping at my heart. It felt painful, it felt suffocating, and I couldn¡¯t breathe well. I can only sigh. I heard her tell me her feelings for the first time. The feelings she held all these years and didn¡¯t reveal to me for the past year. ¡°I wanted to be by his side. I wanted to hear his voice. That was all I wanted. I didn¡¯t need anything else. He doesn¡¯t need to know I love him. I just wanted to be by his side.¡± I listened silently to her confession. I listened quietly while feeling the warmth from her back. ¡°That¡¯s why I took advantage of my friendship with Orpheus and your kindness. I¡¯m not staying in this mansion because Orpheus pities me, but because I asked him to let me stay. ¨D¨D¨D I want to be by his side. I don¡¯t want to leave. Please don¡¯t take away my hope, my light, my reason to live. I told him to convince his spouse, to convince you to let me stay.¡± Diana kept repeating that it was all her fault. Her breathing became rough, and she pressed her trembling hands on her mouth. Her white face turned pale; she looked as if she was in pain, and it looked as if she would faint at any moment. ¡°I¡¯m a selfish and stupid woman. I wanted to stay by his side, so I got the people around me involved. I made you all unhappy. When you suspected my relationship with Orpheus, I thought that you would understand if I denied it properly, but I was wrong. I didn¡¯t think about how you felt¡­ No, I knew how you felt, but I was selfish. I believed you when you said that I wasn¡¯t the reason for your discord with your Orpheus, I pretended to believe you, and stayed in this mansion.¡± Diana lifted her face up and looked around as if she was searching for me. I put my hands on Diana¡¯s cheeks and gently moved her face so that our gazes would meet. ¡°Ophelia,¡± her lips trembled. ¡°I¡¯m selfish, stupid, ugly and beyond saving. I¡¯m disgusting. It¡¯s all my fault. It¡¯s my fault that things have gotten strange between you and Orpheus.¡± ¡°Diana¡­¡± Diana shook her head as if she was refusing any consolation, and I couldn¡¯t find the words to say to her. I could only call her name even though she was suffering and in pain. ¡°I have a selfish and stupid wish, that¡¯s why I relied on Orpheus¡¯s and your kindness and didn¡¯t think more about your feelings¡­ Therefore, I broke your relationship. I made the relationship between you two strange. Even if that wasn¡¯t the cause for your relationship falling apart like you said, I still played a role in it. It¡¯s my fault. I¡¯m sorry. I¡¯m really sorry, Ophelia. I know it¡¯s not something I can apologise for. I won¡¯t ask you to forgive me. But I¡¯ll accept any punishment until you feel satisfied. If you tell me to die, then I¡¯ll die. I¡¯ll do anything. I¡¯m sorry, Ophelia.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry, I¡¯m sorry,¡± Diana continued to repeat as she sobbed, and I could only give my usual explanations. ¡°It¡¯s not your fault, I¡¯ve said this many times. You¡¯re not the cause of this discord. This is what I¡¯m actually like, and I got tired of acting like a good girl like you, so I went back to how I was.¡± The fool is me, not Diana. Orpheus and Diana were supposed to marry and be happy, but my existence destroyed their relationship. Diana didn¡¯t do anything wrong. She lost her parents, lost her sight, and even had her lover snatched away. Diana should be happy this time. ¨D¨D¨D You¡¯re my precious friend, so please be happy. ¡°Say, Diana. I¡¯m¡­¡± ¡°I¡¯m leaving this mansion.¡± ¡°What?¡± My heart jumped. What did she say just now? I wish for your happiness, but what did you just say? ¡°You¡¯re leaving the mansion?¡± Goosebumps ran along my spine. I felt horrible. The tip of my hands and feet are getting cold. ¨D¨D¨D Why did she think of something like that? Unaware of my change, Diana took a few deep breaths before wiping her tears with her cuff. Her tears kept flowing out, no matter how much she wiped. ¡°I¡¯ll be moving into Klauwell villa in a week. I talked with Orpheus about this. I won¡¯t return to this mansion again, and I won¡¯t see you or Orpheus ever again. I¡¯ll stay in the villa until I die. If you¡¯re willing to punish me, then I¡¯ll accept it, but if you won¡¯t, then I¡¯ll make amends by living as if I¡¯m dead. I don¡¯t know if that will make up for everything,¡± Diana¡¯s voice sounded as if it was cracking. I felt extremely strange as if she was talking in a faraway place and as if this wasn¡¯t reality. My mouth felt dry, and my body felt fuzzy, and I couldn¡¯t even tell if it was hot or cold even though the sun was intense. Is the irritating ringing in my ears my heartbeat or something else? ¡°Please, Ophelia.¡± Diana linked her hands together as if she was praying. ¡°Start over with Orpheus. He doesn¡¯t have noble blood, and he thinks you hate him because of that, but that¡¯s not true, is it? You¡¯re not that kind of person. You¡¯re kind to me even though I¡¯m blind, so you don¡¯t care about the colour of the blood that flows in one¡¯s body.¡± ¡°Colour of the blood that flows?¡± The colour of the blood that flows ¨D¨D¨D is she referring to the blue blood that is said to flow in the body of nobles? Like Diana said, I don¡¯t care about that. It doesn¡¯t matter if Orpheus is a noble or not. I¡¯ll love him forever. I won¡¯t hate him for that reason. ¨D¨D¨D But, does Orpheus think I hate him because of that? Is that why he made that expression when I said I hated him? He had muttered, ¡ºWhy? ¡» with an incredibly hurt and sad expression on his face. ¡ºYou¡¯re the only one who can¡¯t abandon me.¡» ¡ºI won¡¯t.¡» Because I felt like I denied my own existence if I left someone who was like me. ¡°Orpheus is¡­¡± ¡°So, please. He, Orpheus, only has you. It can only be you. It¡¯s alright if you can¡¯t love him. Just stay by his side.¡± ¡°No.¡± Orpheus needs Diana. Not me. It can only be Diana. Because he loves her. ¡°You¡¯re wrong, Diana.¡± Diana isn¡¯t the one who should leave this mansion, it¡¯s me. For Orpheus¡¯s happiness, and to fulfil the wishes of Juris and Diana, I must disappear. The relationship between Orpheus and Diana has to return to how it used to be. That¡¯s why I became a foolish woman. I played the bad wife, was hated by people and lost my reputation in high society. I hurt Orpheus and continue to put up with this pain. And yet, when Diana leaves, everything will go down the drain. Everything will be wasted. Orpheus won¡¯t laugh anymore. My loved one will not be happy. Everyone will become unhappy. ¨D¨D¨D No. That definitely can¡¯t happen. ¡°You can¡¯t leave. Absolutely not.¡± ¡°No, Ophelia. I¡¯ve already decided. I¡¯ll cut off my wishful thoughts and end them. ¨D¨D¨D Actually, I¡¯ve been told. By the person I like. He told me I should leave this mansion. He said he¡¯s not going to respond to my feelings.¡± ¡°No way.¡± I was stunned that he had said that. He didn¡¯t need to do this. He said he wanted to keep her in this mansion, so why is he trying to kick her out now? Every time he wanted to get her to leave the mansion, I persuaded him to stop. Did he get tired of betraying the woman he loved because of his father¡¯s last request, so he¡¯s trying to kick her out? Is he abandoning her? Discomfort swelled up from within me, and my throat felt like it was burning. Anger and sadness filled my mind. ¡°I¡¯m a horrible woman, aren¡¯t I? I said that it was fine just to be by his side while carelessly confessing everything. I can¡¯t bring myself to leave unless I¡¯m clearly rejected.¡± Diana laughed. It was a cynical laugh that didn¡¯t suit her. ¡°But I¡¯ve had enough. Staying by his side was everything to me. I don¡¯t care what happens now that I¡¯ve lost it. So, please.¡± I liked Diana¡¯s eyes. It always shone brightly like a light blue jewel even if she couldn¡¯t see the scenery around her. That jewel had lost its light and was shining with darkness. Large drops of tears dripped down from her eyes. ¡°Diana,¡± When I tried to call out to her in a friendly tone, I saw Orpheus wandering around in the garden while looking at us from the corner of my eyes. Even though he said he wouldn¡¯t come out, he was probably worried that I would do something terrible to her. He found us at the entrance of the rose maze and was approaching. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, I knew it. I thought when I saw his happy smile. Orpheus loves Diana. He loves her from the bottom of his heart. I¡¯m sure he¡¯s caught between his foster father¡¯s last request and his feelings for Diana and has been troubled. He must have been heartbroken when Diana decided that she would leave. ¨D¨D¨D But, it¡¯s wrong. Orpheus¡¯s choice is wrong. It was wrong of him to choose the will of the dead over the woman he loves, over a living person. I took Diana¡¯s hand and moved her to a place away from the rose bushes. She stared curiously. I placed a hand on her shoulder and whispered in her ear, ¡°You definitely can¡¯t leave the mansion. I¡¯ll make your wish come true.¡± ¡°Ophelia?¡± ¡°Thanks for being my friend. I was happy. I had a lot of fun.¡± I smile at Diana, who seemed stunned, in a way that Orpheus wouldn¡¯t see. It wasn¡¯t the smile that I had practised numerous times in front of the mirror; it was a real smile. ¡°If you want me to punish you, then I will. Since punishing you will probably save you. It will probably hurt but put up with it. Then, be happy this time.¡± ¡°What do you¡­¡± I knew better than anyone that I had no right to punish Diana because I was more selfish and foolish than her. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m sorry. I won¡¯t ask you to forgive me. It¡¯s better if you hate me. Then, the pain in your hurt will ease, and your tears will also stop. I inhaled and spoke from my stomach. I played the clown. ¡°Don¡¯t be silly! That side of you is repulsive!¡± I pushed her slender shoulder, and she fell down easily. Ophelia. When I saw her lips move, I thought that I should be punished. Chapter 25 - Drastic Action Translator: blushy Editor: delishnoodles Diana collapsed abruptly and looked like a doll. A broken doll who had fallen in a rose maze. The sight of her flowery hat slipping off, her skirt fluttering and her white hand reaching out to me seemed extremely slow. The petals of the yellow rose danced in the wind and chased after the falling Diana. I hoped that seeing someone I cared about getting hurt in front of me would make me reconsider my wrong choices. I hoped that seeing someone I cared about getting hurt in front of me would cause the pent up frustration and displeasure inside of me would explode. I used Diana for my selfish goal of divorcing Orpheus. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m sorry, Diana. I¡¯m sorry. I knew that she would never forgive me, but I continued to pointlessly apologise in my mind even though it would never reach her. Why am I apologising ¨D¨D¨D it¡¯s obvious. I wanted to lighten my sins by apologising. I wanted to get away from my feelings of guilt. I wanted to believe that I¡¯m an average person who can feel guilty and judge right from wrong. I wanted to believe that my heart wasn¡¯t seeped with evil. ¡°Ah,¡± a faint groan escaped from my mouth. Orpheus was running desperately towards us. I¡¯ve never seen him look so desperate. I felt like this was the first time that I¡¯ve seen him run. This person really does love Diana, I earnestly thought at a time like this, then noticed that my way of thinking and sense was different from the ordinary person. I¡¯m not normal. I might be broken somewhere. Or, I might have been abnormal from the moment I was born. I¡¯m crazy enough to hurt my beloved¡¯s love so that I can achieve my goal. ¨D¨D¨D That¡¯s why no one loves me. I¡¯m not needed if there¡¯s no reason for needing me. My heart beat loudly. I wanted my soul to disappear from this world. I wish I wasn¡¯t born at all. I was attacked by intense regret. ¡°Diane!¡± Orpheus ran up to us at an alarming speed and stopped Diana¡¯s body from hitting the soft lawn. ¡°Are you alright?!¡± ¡°Orph¡­ eus?¡± Diana didn¡¯t know what was happening and whispered before her eyes rolled, ¡°Why are you here?¡± Orpheus looked scary when he saw Diana. He gently supported her back as if he was handling delicate glasswork and stood her firmly on the ground. ¡°I, I¡¯m okay. I¡¯m okay,¡± Diana repeated after she recovered from the shock of being pushed away and smiled. ¡°I got dizzy because it was too hot and lost my footing. I wasn¡¯t injured since you caught me, Orphe. And nothing hurts. So, I¡¯m fine,¡± Diana thought Orpheus hadn¡¯t seen what happened and said to protect me because she didn¡¯t know that Orpheus had been standing close to us. Did she think that she could deceive him if she said I hadn¡¯t done anything wrong and it was her fault? She didn¡¯t even know that the person who she was trying to protect was being glared at. ¡°Diana, you ¨D¨D¨D,¡± When I opened my mouth to criticise the soft-hearted Diana, I saw that her maid was running this way. ¡°Diane-sama!¡± She had probably watched us in secret because she was worried about Diana being alone with her love rival. She turned pale and looked awful as if she was in great shock. ¡°Ah, Diane-sama! I¡¯m so glad! I¡¯m so glad that Master made it in time!¡± ¡°Marion? That voice belongs to Marion, right? Why are you here¡­?¡± ¡°I was worried about you and hid behind a tree so that I could come running if something were to happen¡­ Ah, Diane-sama! Horrible, terrible! It¡¯s horrible of her to suddenly push you! Even though you can¡¯t see! You only wanted to apologise to her!¡± ¡°You¡¯re wrong, Marion. Ophelia didn¡¯t push me!¡± ¡°You were pushed away by me,¡± I declared in a low tone, and everyone closed their mouths. Orpheus looked around as if he was searching for something, Diana¡¯s eyes wandered around the maze, and Diana¡¯s maid ¨D¨D¨D Marion Kirst turned red in anger. I sneered at them as they stood there with different expressions on their faces, and said in contempt, ¡°Honestly, what an annoying woman. Acting like a goody-goody and making me into the villain by acting like a tragic heroine. What¡¯s with the ¡®I just staggered, and fell¡¯? You said that because you knew that Orpheus had seen what had happened, right? You make yourself look better if you protect me like that. As expected of Diane-sama, the servants are complimenting you for protecting the good-for-nothing wife.¡± ¡°Ophelia¡­¡± ¡°That¡¯s how you made everyone hate me. The servants hate me and isolate me. You¡¯re seriously annoying and unpleasant. I wish you would just hit your head and die already.¡± ¡°Wh-what are you¡­!¡± Marion stepped forward to protect Diana, and her fists were shaking. ¡°Aren¡¯t you hated because of your actions?! It¡¯s not Diane-sama¡¯s fault! Diane-sama has always regretted what has happened, so she tried to apologise to you. How dare you behave this horribly!?¡± ¡°Shut up you insolent maid. Talking out of line even though you¡¯re a servant, do you want to get fired? Know your place. If you want to show off your incompetence, then do it elsewhere. You¡¯re an eyesore.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t care! If you want to fire me, then just do so!¡± ¡°Marion! Stop it!¡± Diane chided her as she looked angry, but Marion continued arguing since the blood had rushed to her head. But a dry voice slipped through and stopped her, ¡°Marion.¡± ¡°M-master.¡± ¡°I¡¯ll leave Diana to you,¡± Orpheus said with an indifferent expression that made it hard to tell what he was thinking. Marion grinded her teeth in frustration and stood beside Diana. Diana sensed that things weren¡¯t peaceful and said, ¡°Wait, Orpheus,¡± but Orpheus didn¡¯t reply back to her. ¡°Why did you push Diana?¡± I saw that his blue eyes were shaking in anger, but I glared back at him without flinching and calmly spoke selfishly, ¡°It¡¯s not my fault. It¡¯s Diana¡¯s fault for making me angry.¡± ¡°I¡¯m asking you why you pushed her.¡± ¡°Orpheus, are you angry?¡± I widened my eyes as if to say I didn¡¯t understand why he was making such a face, and he frowned. I blinked several times, then pretended to notice why he was angry for the first time and pouted. ¡°So, you are angry. You¡¯re horrible. You¡¯re trying to blame me even though I hadn¡¯t done anything wrong.¡± I felt like the heroine of a tragedy. I¡¯m good at acting like a woman who believed she was always right. A woman who couldn¡¯t be reasoned with, and never admits her mistakes. A woman who didn¡¯t listen to any arguments and shrilled and screamed when heavily criticised. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯ll play a clown until the end. I raised my ugly, distorted face and stared at him with eyes of hatred. ¡°Why are you on Diana¡¯s side?¡± Those words exploded with fury. ¡°Why are you always like this!? We were so close, weren¡¯t we?! I always behaved myself and even told you that I liked you! So why are you never on my side?! Why do you always blame me?! Even though Diana said a lot of things that made me angry!¡± I screamed as if I¡¯d gone mad, and Diana and Marion froze like they were stone statues. Marion returned to her senses because she felt like I would be a danger and took a step forward to protect Diana. Orpheus¡¯s frown deepened, and his lips pursed tightly together. ¡°It¡¯s always like this! Everyone¡¯s on Diana¡¯s side and makes me out to be the villain! I hate it! I loathe it! I wish she would die! I wish she would get hurt and suffer!¡± I don¡¯t want to hear what anyone says. I don¡¯t intend to listen to their words. ¨D¨D¨D I covered my ears to express my intentions. Since everyone had become silent, my voice resounded so much that I hated it. I couldn¡¯t stand to hear my voice and my ugly desire continued to echo in my mind. ¨D¨D¨D He¡¯s going to hit me. I saw Orpheus raise a hand in the corner of her eye and thought. I said something I shouldn¡¯t have. Orpheus is extremely angry. That¡¯s why he¡¯s going to hit me. I bit my teeth so that he could hit me at any time. I prepared myself mentally so that I can defend myself even if I fall. I¡¯m used to being beaten. I¡¯m used to it, so I won¡¯t get hurt. I won¡¯t scream. I won¡¯t cry. ¡°Ophelia.¡± ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s okay. I¡¯m sure I¡¯ll be fine. ¡°That¡¯s enough, already. Stop it.¡± Orpheus didn¡¯t hit me with the hand he had risen. He grabbed my hands which were blocking my ears and looked at my ugly face. Then, he whispered in a gentle voice that made my heart pound. I understood when I saw him up close. His blue eyes weren¡¯t shaking in anger, but in an emotion that was close to sadness. ¡°It¡¯s painful to see you hate me and behave in a way that¡¯s not yourself. So, please stop.¡± ¡°Wh¡­ at¡­?¡± Hot air drifted about as the wind blew. It blew through the gaps of the rose maze and made Orpheus¡¯s black hair and the hems of Diana¡¯s and Marion¡¯s skirt shake. The breeze brushed against my cheeks comfortably, and I knew I was sweating. ¡°Apologise to Diana. You used Diana to get me to hate you. You pushed her and ranted. Those actions are unforgivable no matter what your intentions are.¡± ¡°No, she doesn¡¯t need to.¡± ¡°Diane-sama?!¡± ¡°Marion, be quiet.¡± Diana stepped forward. The scene reflected in my eyes clearly, but I couldn¡¯t understand what was happening. It was as if time was only passing for one person, and I was being left behind. I thought about Orpheus¡¯s words and desperately tried to understand what he meant, but only unimportant thoughts came to mind so I stopped thinking. ¨D¨D¨D No, that¡¯s not it. I understood. I knew exactly what he had meant the moment he had spoken. I didn¡¯t want to know; I was fooling myself. I was trying to delude myself. If I accept his words, then I¡¯ll break down; my actions and the painful days I had to endure would become meaningless. ¡°I wanted it. She was punishing me. Ophelia soiled her hands to lighten my guilt. She might have used me, but I don¡¯t care. Since I was the one who had tortured her and drove her into a corner. I made everyone hate Ophelia.¡± The wind stopped, and there was a sullen aura in the air. ¡°Orpheus, she¡­¡± ¡°Stop,¡± I weakly stopped Diana, who was trying to ruin everything. I breathed quickly even though I didn¡¯t want to and bluffed. ¡°I haven¡¯t said anything, so don¡¯t decide things on your own. Don¡¯t speak nonsense.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Play along if you want to be happy. I had said those things so earnestly, but Diana never agreed. She stood frozen with a puzzled expression on her face and muttered, ¡°I¡¯m not in the position to say anything.¡± ¡°We two should talk. No, please talk to each other. Please, Ophelia. If you don¡¯t want me to decide things, then talk about it yourself. If you won¡¯t, then I¡¯ll confess everything here and now.¡± ¡°¡­ Diana.¡± Why are you saying such things? Do you not want to be happy? Didn¡¯t you want to be by Orpheus¡¯s side? Why are you doing this when I¡¯m trying to grant your wish? ¡°I found out about it.¡± I didn¡¯t ask what. I couldn¡¯t ask what since I saw her white eyelids droop sadly. Even though I could usually cut off a conversation and leave, I couldn¡¯t build up the willpower to do so. My lips wouldn¡¯t move, and my feet were sewn to the ground. ¡°Orpheus, you should tell her properly as well. Don¡¯t be afraid, be brave. ¨D¨D¨D Marion, your arm.¡± ¡°Diane-sama.¡± ¡°Take me away.¡± Diana grabbed the maid¡¯s hand and said her love rival¡¯s name with red eyes like a rabbit, ¡°Ophelia.¡± Her light blue eyes couldn¡¯t see, but she was looking straight at me. ¡°I¡¯m sorry. I¡¯m really sorry.¡± ¡°Wait.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Don¡¯t go. Change your mind. Don¡¯t leave the mansion. Stay by Orpheus¡¯s side. I pushed you, so you must realise your feelings and grant your wish. Juris also wants this. ¨D¨D¨D Please, don¡¯t go. I reached out. However, Diana smiled sadly, turned around and left with Marion. She left the rose maze and walked far away under the sunlight. ¡°Diane.¡± I looked down and looked at the petals that were scattered at my feet while stunned. ¡°Why?¡± Why did things end up like this? Things have been doing so well, so why did I fail? Why wouldn¡¯t Diana cooperate with me? It would have gone well if we had worked together. Everyone would have been happy. A drop trickled down from my forehead and hit the grass. It¡¯s hot. Come to think of it, it¡¯s scorching. It¡¯s cold, but it¡¯s hot. I can¡¯t stop sweating. When I went to wipe my forehead, a white finger stretched out faster and brushed my forehead. It wiped my sweat away. When I looked up, I saw Orpheus looking down at me quietly. His expression was cold, as if he didn¡¯t feel any heat at all. ¡°Orpheus.¡± He took out a handkerchief and wiped the sweat on his hand before presenting it to me. ¡°Let¡¯s go back.¡± I wonder if I should accept or decline. I don¡¯t want to talk to him. I don¡¯t have anything to say to him. I¡¯m not looking for understanding, but a unilateral declaration from Orpheus. I don¡¯t need any kind words or sweet smiles. Let¡¯s get divorced ¨D¨D¨D that¡¯s all he has to say. ¡°Orpheus, I¡¯m¡­¡± I don¡¯t know if he didn¡¯t want to hear what I wanted to say, or if he knew that I had nothing to say, but he took my hand and started walking. He forcefully took me out of the rose maze. ¨D¨D¨D Scary. I had a premonition and was very afraid. If all the things I have built are collapsing, then it would be better if I wander around the maze forever than witness this scene. It¡¯s better to dream that Orpheus is smiling happily and endure the pain. I don¡¯t care if I remain a foolish woman. I don¡¯t care if I¡¯m hated. ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s terrifying. Even though the warmth from my beloved¡¯s hands was warming my cold hands, it didn¡¯t drive away my anxiety and fear. Chapter 26 - The End of the Maze Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles He pulled my hands as we walked up the stone steps. We passed the entrance and went up the spiral staircase in the hall. Orpheus continued to hold my hand and didn¡¯t seem like he would let go. He continued to walk while looking calm, even though he hated it when I touched him until yesterday. What would happen if I shook off his hand and ran away? Will he pretend nothing happened like before? Interacting with Diana, pushing her, the words that came out from Orpheus¡¯s mouth, can we pretend that none of that had happened? Runaway, hide somewhere and wait for time to pass. But I don¡¯t have the energy to do that. I had decided that I would play the clown until the end, but I was swept away by those words. ¡ºIt¡¯s painful to see you behave unlike yourself to get me to hate you.¡» Orpheus¡¯s words sounded like he knew that I was acting like a foolish woman. ¡°Let¡¯s talk in your room.¡± When I came back to my senses, we were in front of my room, and Orpheus was about to open the door. He opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something, but he forced me into the room before he spoke. The door closed with a loud bang, and I lost the chance to escape. All I could do was be puzzled. ¨D¨D¨D How did this happen? What went wrong? I repeated these pointless questions in my mind, but couldn¡¯t come up with an answer, so I sighed quietly and took off my flower hat. I placed it on a nearby chair, wiped off my sweat, and looked around at the familiar bedroom. ¡°Did you listen to what Diana had to say?¡± I turned around, and Orpheus picked up a jug, then poured water into a small glass. He looked as if he knew something, and he did. I did my best to think even though I couldn¡¯t, and answered briefly, ¡°Yes.¡± I know it would be fatal if I were to say unnecessary things right now, but I couldn¡¯t help but ask, ¡°Did you really tell her to get out of the mansion?¡± ¡°Me?¡± Orpheus tilted his head, questioningly, as he held out the glass that was filled to the brim. I hesitated and finally received the cup before asking timidly. I felt relieved when I sipped the lukewarm water and finally regained my composure. ¡°I heard it from Diana. She said that you told her to get out. You¡¯re a horrible person too. That blind woman is finally being chased out. It serves her right. She makes me furious, that woman. I pitied her until now, but I regret letting her stay in this mansion,¡± I said before gulping down the remaining water. A white hand took the empty glass from my hand. ¡°I don¡¯t know what you¡¯re angry about, but I didn¡¯t drive her away. I have suggested this a few times in the past, but Diana decided this on her own this time.¡± ¡°Eh. So, either you or Diana are lying. You wouldn¡¯t lie since you¡¯re idiotically honest, so it must be Diana?¡± ¡°It¡¯s probably Juris who told her that.¡± ¡°What did you say?¡± ¨D¨D¨D No way, I can¡¯t believe it. Juris wouldn¡¯t say something like that. He loves Diana and wishes for her happiness more than anyone else. I can¡¯t believe that he would tell Diana to leave. And, if he had said that¡­ ¡ºActually, I¡¯ve been told. By the person I like. He told me I should leave this mansion.¡» I recalled Diana¡¯s ironic laugh, and my stomach sunk. The hunch and anxiety that was building up inside me made my body cold. ¡°Apparently, that was why she wanted to leave. I asked her if it was really alright, but she¡¯s stubborn and said that she wouldn¡¯t return to this mansion. I didn¡¯t think I would be able to stop her either. If she wants to leave, then it¡¯s fine for her to leave.¡± ¡°Because she was the one who wanted to stay in this mansion, not you?¡± Orpheus squinted his eyes as if he recalled something while putting the jug and glass back into its place. ¡°Diana told you everything.¡± At that moment, I felt a strong force push my shoulder. It was a surprise attack like the one I had sprung on Diana, and I couldn¡¯t resist. I fell into a bottomless¨D¨D¨D. ¡°That¡¯s right. That was what she wanted. I lied to get your sympathy. Diana said she didn¡¯t want to know love between people of different social positions, so I used another method of persuasion.¡± It¡¯s already hopeless, I thought. My hunch is becoming a reality. It¡¯s like a nightmare. I had no choice but to fall. This is probably my punishment for pushing Diana. I continued to fall without any means to do anything about the bottomless despair. ¡°I wanted to grant Diana¡¯s wish. I feel bad that she lost her family and sight, so at least, I wanted her to be with the man she loves, ¨D¨D¨D with Juris; even if it¡¯s just for a brief moment.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry for lying to you,¡± Orpheus continued, ¡°I made you misunderstand the situation because I didn¡¯t tell the truth.¡± ¡°Actually, Elze repeatedly told me to move Diana to another place and that you became like this because I listened to Diana¡¯s selfishness.¡± ¡°Why did Elze say that?¡± Elze is on Diana¡¯s side and hates me. So, why did she tell her to move into another place? She even went as far as to go against her master. ¡°Did Elze know who Diana loves as well?¡± ¡°No, she shouldn¡¯t. It¡¯s just that she thinks about you in her own way. She was probably worried because she was harsh on you. She¡¯s a perfectionist, so she didn¡¯t have any mercy on you as well, right? She tried to hold back every time she thought she was overdoing it. This is just a guess, but she might think that she¡¯s the cause for your sudden attitude change, so she¡¯s worried about you because she feels guilty.¡± ¡°She¡¯s strict, but she¡¯s not a bad person,¡± ¨D¨D¨D Orpheus said as he raised the corners of his lips a little. I couldn¡¯t stand to see his smile and turned to the side. Then, I saw colourful roses in the corner of the room. Come to think of it, there are always roses in that vase ever since spring came. Red, white, yellow, light red, and orange. The vase is full of vivid roses. A strange urge welled up from within me, and a sob escaped from my lips. ¨D¨D¨D I don¡¯t want to accept it. I don¡¯t want to accept that Juris and Diana both love each other. I can¡¯t accept it. What will happen to Orpheus? How can he be happy when he loves Diana? What will happen to all the evil deeds that I have piled up? ¡ºOrpheus loves you.¡»Juris¡¯s words repeated in my mind. I heard them over and over again. I felt an impact on my chest as if I had just been hit, and I couldn¡¯t breathe. It¡¯s tough and painful. This is a nightmare. This reality can only be a nightmare. I can¡¯t accept this at all. ¡°Say it¡¯s a lie.¡± My brain knew it, but my heart couldn¡¯t keep up. I wish this was all a dream. I wish this was all fake. ¡°Tell me it¡¯s a lie, Orpheus. I can¡¯t accept this. I will never accept this. I don¡¯t want to accept this.¡± I approached the man who was close enough to be within my reach and grabbed his collar. I was trying to stop myself from collapsing. ¡°Diana loves you, doesn¡¯t she? You both love each other, don¡¯t you? But you want to follow your foster father¡¯s last request. You want to follow it, so you needed to stay married to me, so that¡¯s why you tried to chase Diana away. You¡¯re even lying to me and telling me nonsense to keep our marriage. ¨D¨D¨D Right?¡± That¡¯s right. I¡¯m certain. And, I haven¡¯t heard this directly from Diana. I haven¡¯t heard who she loves and who she wants to stay by. ¡°No. Absolutely not. Diana can¡¯t leave, because she wants to be by your side. You both love each other. Don¡¯t follow his last request and choose Diana.¡± ¡°Diana loves Juris. She doesn¡¯t love me. We feel no love for each other. From the beginning.¡± ¡°It¡¯s a lie! You¡¯re lying!¡± ¡°I¡¯m not.¡± I can¡¯t believe this. Orpheus was calm even at a time like this. When I actually looked at him, he did look a little lonely, and he was looking down on the woman who was grabbing his collar. ¡°Why do you have to go that far to protect his last request?! Is the will of a deceased person that important?! Is it more important than Diana!?¡± ¡°Ophelia, calm down.¡± ¡°Why won¡¯t you divorce me!? You should divorce me and get married again to Diana! You should make her happy!¡± He didn¡¯t get angry no matter what I said, so I shouted in a loud voice. My bravado was gone, and I went back to my usual self, but that doesn¡¯t even matter now. I don¡¯t care how I look. ¡°I won¡¯t divorce you,¡± he muttered, and the blood drained from my face. My mind felt as if it had been splashed with cold water, and I stopped breathing. ¡°I¡¯m not going to divorce you no matter what you say. I won¡¯t.¡± ¡°Screw you! Who cares about his last request¨D¨D¨D¡­.¡± ¡°This has nothing to do with his last request. This is what I want. I¡¯ll never break up with you, no matter how much you ignore me or hate me.¡± He grabbed my wrist and raged as if he had gone mad. ¡°Let me go!¡± I shrieked. I resisted him even though it was pointless and desperately tried not to collapse. ¡°You¡¯re lying. It¡¯s a lie. Lie. Lie. It¡¯s all a lie!¡± He restrained my body, probably because this was getting nowhere. He hugged me so tightly that I couldn¡¯t breathe. ¡°Ophelia,¡± he called my name many times. ¡°Stop, stop it, Orpheus! Let me go!¡± ¡°I love you.¡± ¡°You love Diana, don¡¯t you?!¡± ¡°It¡¯s a different kind of love. The love I feel for Diana is familial love, the love I feel for you is the love between husband and wife. To be clear, how I feel towards Diana can¡¯t be compared to how I feel towards you.¡± ¡°Lies!¡± It¡¯s wrong, someone whispered in my mind. It¡¯s wrong to deny the warmth that is surrounding your body, the power, and the clingy voice. I actually know. I¡¯m just afraid. I believe him, but I¡¯m afraid that the things I have accumulated will crumble. I¡¯m afraid that I had actually been a clown instead of acting like one. ¡°I love you, Ophelia. I know you¡¯re avoiding me. I also noticed that you want us to divorce. I know you feel sorry for me, and that you¡¯ve been trying to make me hate you so that you wouldn¡¯t hurt me to reduce my mental burdens.¡± ¡°But I still love you,¡± Orpheus said. I love you. I love you. He repeated over and over, and those words sunk into my mind. He rubbed my back and took away my power to resist and my thoughts. ¡°You¡¯ll probably only feel uncomfortable now that I¡¯ve told you. You will probably never accept this. But I still love you. I was captivated by you the moment I saw you. This feeling will never change even if you despise my past, the blood that flows through my body, humanity or ignore me.¡± I felt as if my heart was being seized. Seized and gripped tightly. My blood stopped flowing. The cold is just my imagination. I have no feeling in my hands and feet. ¡°You just have to stay by my side. I don¡¯t want anything else. You don¡¯t even have to talk to me. If it¡¯s painful even to touch each other, then you don¡¯t have to accompany me at night, and I¡¯ll have another woman give me an heir. Claude ¨D¨D¨D, you can continue your relationship with your lover, and you can buy all the dresses and jewellery that you want. I won¡¯t stop you from going out. I promise I won¡¯t lecture you at all about it from now on. So please¡­¡± Orpheus¡¯s voice trembled. It felt as if he was afraid and in pain. ¡°I don¡¯t care if you hate me. You can hate me. Just stay by my side.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Just a single word is fine. Muster up my courage and just say one word, ¡°No,¡± then it¡¯ll all be over. I can¡¯t stay by your side, that¡¯s all I have to say. I thought but couldn¡¯t speak. It¡¯s because of the roses. It¡¯s because the roses are in that place. Those roses reminded me of the moments that will never happen again; the happiest moment in my life when we had hopes. ¡ºWhen the roses bloom, I¡¯ll deliver them to your room every day.¡» ¡°I¡­¡± It was your happiness that I wished for. I wanted you to laugh. I thought I could do anything if you could laugh. I didn¡¯t mind if I was unhappy. And yet, why did it end up like this? I just wanted to make you happy. ¡°What makes you happy? What can I do to make you happy?¡± ¡°Stay by my side,¡± he replied without hesitation, and I was knocked down once more. I was knocked down to the bottomless pit of despair. ¡°I don¡¯t need anything else if you¡¯re by my side. I don¡¯t need noble status, assets, or anything. If you tell me you love me, then I could just die right here and now.¡± ??????? Orpheus left my room after his long persuasion, and I hung my head down because I felt like I was at my wits¡¯ end. I fell down to the ground like that and stared absentmindedly at the geometric patterns on the carpet. The shock had been too great, and I went over all the crimes I had committed in my mind while resisting the urge to scream. A sob escaped from my lips. I¡¯ve hurt a lot of people. I tormented a lot of people. The more I thought about it, the more I felt like I was going to go mad. I was about to be crushed by the weight of my sins. ¨D¨D¨D I just wanted you to be happy. I just wanted you to laugh. I didn¡¯t just hurt those involved. I also hurt Orpheus, who I wanted to make happy. I made him sad. I¡¯m not sure whether Orpheus actually loves me or not, but I¡¯m sure that I hurt him and made him suffer while I was acting as a bad wife. It¡¯s an unforgivable crime. ¡°Orpheus.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Even though I loved you. Even though I loved you more than anyone else. I wished for your happiness, but I¡¯ve hurt you. I made you suffer. I made you have bitter experiences for a long time. I should have cleared the misunderstanding at once, but I couldn¡¯t say anything. ¡°Why did I¡­?¡± Probably because I¡¯m a foolish and hopeless person. I was a clown. I was a real clown. I didn¡¯t degrade into a foolish woman on purpose. I was stupid from the start. I was an absolute moron for not listening to what others had to say and acted only on my beliefs. ¨D¨D¨D Ah. I sighed. What to do? What should I do? What am I supposed to do now? I don¡¯t want to make another mistake. I don¡¯t want to act like an idiot. What the heck should I do? ¡°Claire. Claude.¡± ¨D¨D¨D What should I do? I stood up like a ghost and staggered out of my room. I went down the stairs and looked for Claire in every room. Sometimes, I asked the servants, who I passed, where she was, but they replied coolly, ¡°I don¡¯t know,¡± so I continued to loiter around until it got dark outside. ¡°Madam, what¡¯s wrong?¡± A voice called out to me when I got to the laundry room, and when I turned back, I saw Juris looking at me questioningly. He was wondering what I was doing in a place that only servants entered. ¡°I¡¯m looking for Claire. Do you know where she is?¡± ¡°Claire? She¡¯s out at the moment.¡± I recalled that I had requested her to take care of some business for me. I had told her to sell the dresses and jewellery in my closet so I could clear it out. I¡¯m really an idiot for forgetting my own orders. ¡°Thank you for telling me, Juris.¡± ¡°It¡¯s alright. More importantly, you look horrible, Madam¡­ Are you not feeling well?¡± ¡°Yeah. It might be because I walked outside for a bit. But I¡¯m fine.¡± ¡°You look like you¡¯re going to faint right now¡­ Would you like me to take you to your room?¡± I shook my head and refused, ¡°There¡¯s no need.¡± It¡¯s painful for Juris to be kind to me right now. ¡°I heard from Diana that she would be leaving because you asked her to.¡± When I saw his handsome face stiffened, I was worried that I might have said something insensitive, and apologised for many reasons, ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°No, it¡¯s not something you should apologise for, Madam. I should be the one to apologise. I did something that betrayed your thoughtfulness. I am so truly sorry.¡± ¡°Apparently, Diana loves you.¡± Juris averted his gaze and muttered in a low voice, ¡°It seems that way. Our positions are too different, and nothing will happen even if our feelings are the same.¡± ¡°Is that so?¡± Diana probably didn¡¯t confine her feelings to anyone other than Orpheus because she knew this. ¡°Yes. Above all, things were difficult on you because of us. We¡¯ve made you suffer. We should be punished a little. Me, Diana, and of course, Orpheus.¡± ¡°Diana also said something similar. She said she had to make amends and won¡¯t be returning to this mansion again. But, if you all are going to be punished, then I should be punished more heavily.¡± I smiled feebly and said, ¡°I spoke to Orpheus.¡± I couldn¡¯t fake a smile on my face like before. ¡°It must have been funny to see me run around in circles.¡± ¡°We¡¯re the same. You weren¡¯t the only one. We were all like that.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Maybe. We were all looking in different directions. We could have worked together if we knew how each other felt, but we were clumsy and timid, so we acted based on speculation, and hurt each other. We ran around in circles. ¡°Things don¡¯t go as you wish. Humans don¡¯t get what they want.¡± ¨D¨D¨D It would have been easier to break through. Like beasts, we cannot live just for our desires. We can¡¯t be selfish. We can¡¯t be good or bad. Therefore, we lose our way and suffer. ¡°What are you going to do now?¡± ¡°¡­ What is the right thing to do?¡± I stared straight at him, and his grey eyes stared back at me. ¡°Please stay with Orpheus. That¡¯s all he wants.¡± Really? I questioned. Is staying by his side like nothing had happened even though I had hurt him and made a mess of everything the right thing to do? ¡°Are you going to stay with Diana?¡± Juris didn¡¯t answer. He just smiled while enduring pain as if he couldn¡¯t go back to the nostalgic past. I returned to my room and pondered while looking at the roses in the vase. I want to talk to someone about this. But Claire isn¡¯t here. Orpheus will come soon to ask for an answer. I want to talk to someone before he comes. I want someone to give me their impartial opinion. I recalled the young man who smiled mischievously. Phelia, he who calls me in such a friendly way. ¡°Claude.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Let¡¯s go see him. I don¡¯t know how long it would take, but let¡¯s go visit him. I¡¯ll go out and get away from Orpheus for a while. Let¡¯s calm down. I opened the closet, took out a deep blue overcoat, and put on easy to walk in boots. I won¡¯t use the carriage. I feel like I¡¯ve lost my qualifications to use it. I may lose the title of Countess Rosenstein in the not too distant future. So, I¡¯m not qualified. It may take a long time, but let¡¯s walk. I don¡¯t care if it¡¯s dangerous. It¡¯ll be better if I get attacked and die. It¡¯ll be much easier that way. ¡ºStaying by his side was everything to me. I don¡¯t care what happens now that I¡¯ve lost it.¡» I feel like I understand Diana¡¯s feelings well now. I¡¯ve lost what I believe in and what I¡¯ve accomplished. All that remained is sin. So, I don¡¯t care what happens. I probably wanted to be punished. I wanted to be punished by a force that was beyond human wisdom. Chapter 27 - Freedom Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles It was so easy to pass through the gate. All I had to do was give the gatekeeper a little bit of money and told him to keep his mouth shut. I slipped out of the mansion alone and walked on the road that led to the city centre. The impression of the rural scenery was completely different when I was walking compared to when I passed through here with a carriage. The blueness of the sky and the twinkling of the lights were different. I can¡¯t feel the sunshine and the wind blowing on my cheeks or smell the grass and soil in the carriage. I also can¡¯t feel the hard ground under my feet. ¨D¨D¨D I see. Am I free right now? I stopped, wiped the sweat on my forehead and looked up at the sky. The blue summer sky. It was nearly dusk, but the brightness in the sky was the same as noon. Only the intensity of the sun had softened. White clouds were in the sky, and the mountains were covered by a hazy shadow. I could hear summer insects buzz, and when I quietened my breathing, I could hear the refreshing sounds of water flowing. Freedom, I thought. I¡¯m free. I can go anywhere. I¡¯m finally free. And yet, why do I feel so sad? I couldn¡¯t stand the pain in my chest. The blue skies and mountains didn¡¯t yield to the strong sunlight, and the lush green leaves that were growing everywhere were beautiful. It should be wonderful, but why aren¡¯t I happy? I could see the white walls of the Rosenstein mansion when I turned around. The mansion looked pretty under the blue sky with the trees that the gardener carefully attended to. ¡°Orpheus.¡± I didn¡¯t want freedom. I just wanted to make my loved one happy. Until a few hours ago, my freedom was the same as Orpheus obtaining happiness. I should have been able to make him happy when we divorce. However, that wasn¡¯t true. So, I¡¯m sad. I¡¯m not happy even though I¡¯ve gained my freedom. I¡¯m not happy at all. I stopped in the middle of the road and pressed my hands against my chest. I closed my eyelids which felt hot and breathed out. ¨D¨D¨D What should I do? I continued walking to look for the answer. I understood perfectly just how reckless I am. It took about 30 minutes to ride a carriage to Claude¡¯s apartment from the outskirts. I don¡¯t know how long it would take to get there on foot. Moreover, I wasn¡¯t used to walking. I don¡¯t know if I would be able to reach his apartment safely or not. I had my face covered with a hood and was wearing a dark-coloured overcoat, but people can immediately tell my social status from the quality of my coat. It wouldn¡¯t be difficult for a thief or hoodlum to attack me. They would steal all I have on me, assault me, and then throw me in the mountains or river. But, if that happens, then it¡¯s fine. I want to be punished. I want to be judged for my crimes. I want to be tormented. I want to suffer more pain than what Orpheus feels. I probably wanted those things to happen, so that was why I acted recklessly by walking to the city instead of using a carriage. It was around the time when the clouds got darker, and I left the rural countryside and entered the forest road which was dotted with noble villas ¨D¨D¨D. Cool wind instead of lukewarm wind blew against my sweaty skin, and I looked around curiously. I finally noticed that it had gotten dark and looked up at the grey clouds that were beginning to gather. ¡°Is it an evening shower?¡± I muttered while sighing. ¡°God might punish me right away.¡± I stared ahead and continued walking as the strong wind blew and howled. My overcoat swayed in the wind, and my hood flew off, but I left it as it was since I was the only one who was on this dim mountain road. When the dense forest became a forest that was clearly tended to by people, and then turned into mediocre tree-lined country roads, it finally began to rain. The small raindrops falling on the dry road quickly turned into a shower and my vision became hazy. It was pointless to quickly wear my hood, and my overcoat became soaked with water as large raindrops fell between the trees; it didn¡¯t take long for my clothes to get heavy since even the dress that I wore underneath the overcoat got soaked with water. I could have continued walking like this, but I couldn¡¯t see well, and it was difficult to move my heavy body. Claude¡¯s apartment was still far away, and I couldn¡¯t wear myself down, so I decided to go into the forest and wait under a big tree for the rain to stop. I sat down on the tree roots which were looming from the ground and stared at the roads lined with trees beyond the forest while listening to the sound of the raindrops. When I started freezing, I felt like I could hear the sounds of horse hoofs mixed with the heavy sound of rain. Who on earth is out in this heavy rain? I raised my face. The sound of the hoofs grew closer, and before long, several men who appeared to be servants of nobles came from the direction that I had walked, and quickly rushed through the road lined with trees. ¡°Ah!¡± I reflexively raised my voice when I saw the man who was leading them. Orpheus was riding the horse without flinching when the rain hit him, and he had a thoughtful expression on his face. The two men behind him were also familiar faces and were servants of the Rosenstein House. ¨D¨D¨D What happened? It¡¯s rare to see Orpheus in a hurry, I wonder if something serious must have happened. ¡°No way¡­¡± I suddenly realised. They¡¯re probably looking for me since I had suddenly disappeared from the mansion¨D¨D¨D. ¡°But I can¡¯t believe he¡¯s coming after me¡­¡± I remembered the warmth that had enveloped my body and the hot breath that had touched my ears. ¡ºI don¡¯t need anything else if you¡¯re by my side.¡» ¨D¨D¨D Orpheus might really love me. I don¡¯t know since I¡¯ve only been loved by my mother. I don¡¯t understand normal love even if I know about one-sided love. The person I love, loves me back. I can¡¯t believe in such a miraculous occurrence. And if Orpheus¡¯s love is real, then my crimes will become heavier. It would become so heavy that I wouldn¡¯t be able to make up for it in this lifetime. ¡°Orpheus.¡± ¨D¨D¨D What am I supposed to do? Orpheus and his servants continued forward without noticing the woman in the forest. The sound of the rain drowned out the sound of the horse hooves, and I couldn¡¯t hear them anymore. ¨D¨D¨D Ah. I grieved in secret and buried my face in my knees. I can¡¯t do anything about them leaving. I ran away to begin with. I ran away because I wanted to talk to Claude, and it was painful to stay by Orpheus¡¯s side. There¡¯s no point to me running away if I get caught. ¡°This is fine.¡± I miserably kept my head in my knees and waited for the rain to stop. I¡¯ll start walking again when the rain stops, I thought. Orpheus is gone, so it¡¯s okay. He probably won¡¯t be back for a while. However, it wasn¡¯t only Orpheus who was chasing after me. After the rain stopped, I heard horse hooves again when I dragged my wet body through the tree-lined road. I got fed up, looked back and saw a horse in the distance. It would be troublesome if it¡¯s someone from the Rosenstein House again. I looked around carefully and decided to enter the forest again. That was the only place I could hide. I didn¡¯t go too far in since it would be horrible if I got lost. I stood in a place where I could see the tree-lined road and waited for the horse to pass by. However, the horses didn¡¯t run past the road. It stopped near where I was hiding, and the person, who was mounted on the horse, stared at the forest as if they were looking for something. ¡°Why is she here¡­?¡± I was shocked to see a slender person with tied-up brown hair. Renee was on the horse. She wasn¡¯t wearing the female servant¡¯s uniform, but a white shirt with black trousers and long boots that stopped below her knees. She was dressed gallantly and could be mistaken for a man. However, at the same time, she was exuding a terrifying aura. Her shirt was sticking to her skin because of the rain, and the outline of her body could be seen clearly. ¨D¨D¨D Why is Renee here? Renee walked the horse slowly towards the forest, but eventually descended smoothly down onto the road. ¡°Ophelia-sama!¡± I almost jumped the moment my name was screamed. Apparently, Renee was looking for me too. ¨D¨D¨D But, why? Why the heck was a female servant dressing herself as a man and riding a horse to look for me? ¡°Ophelia-sama! Please reply if you¡¯re there!¡± Of course, there¡¯s no way I will answer. I don¡¯t know why she¡¯s looking for me, but I turned around to run away before she found me. ¡°I didn¡¯t come here to take you back to the mansion! I came here to help you, Ophelia-sama!¡± My feet stopped. What does she mean when she said that she came here to help me? ¡°You want to go to Claude-sama¡¯s apartment, right?! I¡¯ll take you there, so please come out! It¡¯ll get dark soon! It¡¯s dangerous in the forest!¡± She must have been anxious since she wasn¡¯t getting a reply, and her expression became stern. ¡°Ophelia-sama!¡± I watched as Renee tied her horse to a nearby tree and pondered. Renee had said that, but can I trust her? Her appearance, aura, and stern expressions; the current Renee is different from the one I know. Most importantly, I don¡¯t think she¡¯s a normal servant. Who the heck is she? I tilted my head curiously. ¨D¨D¨D Don¡¯t tell me she knew as well? Renee entered the forest while I was pondering. ¡°Ophelia-sama,¡± she shouted many times. ¨D¨D¨D Fine. ¡°I¡¯m here.¡± I couldn¡¯t bear how frantic she was, and finally replied. I came out from where I was hiding and raised my hand at the wide-eyed Renee. ¡°Ophelia-sama, are you alright?!¡± ¡°Yes, I¡¯m fine. I¡¯m sorry for hiding.¡± Renee rushed up to me and checked me from head to toe, then sighed in relief. ¡°It doesn¡¯t seem like you¡¯re injured, but you¡¯re soaked. We need to go somewhere for you to dry or change clothes¡­ Anyway, let¡¯s get out of the forest for now.¡± ¡°Renee, are you really here to help me?¡± I asked Renee as she pulled my hand and walked. She opened her eyes slightly, then nodded. ¡°Yes. That¡¯s why I came here.¡± ¡°Will you take me with you then?¡± I wouldn¡¯t mind even if she hated me and was trying to harm me. If that¡¯s what she wants, then it¡¯s fine. ¡°You want to go to Claude-sama¡¯s apartment, right? But you need to change first. You¡¯ll catch a cold like this.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t need to change. I want to meet Claude. Please. Take me there.¡± Renee frowned in confusion, but she knew that I was determined, and nodded, ¡°Alright.¡± When we got out of the forest, she untied her horse, grabbed the reins and walked it to me. ¡°Where did you get this horse?¡± ¡°From the Rosenstein mansion. I stole it from the caretaker. ¨D¨D¨D Ophelia-sama, do you know how to ride a horse?¡± ¡°I can¡¯t do it alone, but I can ride on it if someone rides with me.¡± ¡°Then, that¡¯s good.¡± Renee got on the horse first and pulled me up. I didn¡¯t sit like a man like Renee did, but instead, sat in a womanly way that didn¡¯t require me to roll up my dress. Both my legs were almost to one side, ¨D¨D¨D although it¡¯s weird for people of the same sex to sit like this, ¨D¨D¨D and leaned against Renee who was holding the reins. ¡°We¡¯re going to run now. Please hold on tightly so that you won¡¯t fall off.¡± The horse ran like the wind. Renee controlled the horse so skilfully that she didn¡¯t seem like a woman, and we ran through the scarlet road. ¨D¨D¨D Honestly, who the heck is she? I don¡¯t think she¡¯s just a servant. I was really curious and wanted to ask, but she said, ¡°Please leave the questions for later. You¡¯ll bite your tongue if you talk now.¡± Renee seemed to know shortcuts that I didn¡¯t. She went off the tree-lined roads, and into a narrow road which was hard for carriages to drive through. I was worried since there were no guideposts if we got lost, but we came out onto a wide road a while later, so I felt relieved, and decided to leave it to Renee. Fortunately, we didn¡¯t come across Orpheus. I raised my face when we left the forest and saw an eerie red sky. The setting sun looked blood-red, dying the blue skies and white clouds from the sudden rain the same colour. ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s a little scary. I suddenly thought. It¡¯s so beautiful in its eeriness that it caused my body and lips to tremble. ¡°Are you cold?¡± Renee said when she noticed this. My body trembled strangely. My teeth grinded together and made a sound. The wind was warm, but I was freezing. My wet clothes snatched my body temperature. ¡°We¡¯ll run faster.¡± My consciousness started fading for the first time in my life, and I clung desperately to Renee so that I wouldn¡¯t fall off the horse. ¡°Renee, wait. This is¡­¡± ¡°We¡¯re nearly there,¡± Renee shook me. I raised my head while feeling unwell and was stunned. We were clearly in the outskirts, this wasn¡¯t the city, there was nothing around, and I didn¡¯t know this place. I looked around but couldn¡¯t see the elegant apartment building where Claude lived. It was dark, and I couldn¡¯t see very well, but there were probably fields and I could see a mansion on the same scale as the Rosenstein mansion not far from here. The mansion was magnificent and was built in an old architectural style. The light coming out from the rooms, and the bonfire in the garden gave the mansion a golden glow and made it look as beautiful as a picture. However, I couldn¡¯t afford to be fascinated by this scene. ¡°Where is this?¡± ¡°Claude-sama¡¯s mansion.¡± ¡°Claude¡¯s¡­ mansion?¡± It was cold and hot, my body hurt for some reason, and my head wasn¡¯t working well. So, I thought that I had misheard her and asked back. But Renee continued to look forward and didn¡¯t answer me. The horse continued to run, and we were getting closer and closer to the mansion. ¡°Wait a minute, didn¡¯t you make a mistake? You said this is Claude¡¯s mansion, but he lives in an apartment.¡± ¡°It¡¯s a long story, so I¡¯ll explain it later.¡± ¡°But¡­ Hmm, we won¡¯t be driven away, right¡­? I don¡¯t have anything to prove my identity¡­¡± ¡°Don¡¯t worry. Please stay still. We¡¯re in a hurry.¡± Instead of being turned away at the gate like I had expected, the two men at the gate looked grim when they saw Renee and bowed. They opened the gates without stopping us. Renee stopped the horse a short distance away from the front door. She got off first and helped me down. It would have been fine for me to slip onto the pavement, but I felt so dizzy and found myself collapsed on the spot. ¡°Ophelia-sama!¡± At any rate, I felt hot, cold and weak. It was hard to breathe. ¡°Are you alright!? Are you hurt?!¡± ¡°I, I¡¯m okay. I¡¯m fine.¡± I wasn¡¯t fine, but I stood up with Renee¡¯s help, and went into the mansion. I nearly fell down many times on the way there. Renee would support me each time this happened, but I would say, ¡°I¡¯m fine,¡± and walk by myself. We stood in the hall, and a young maid ran up to us when she noticed us. I was prepared to be kicked out, but she was probably someone Renee knew since she seemed surprised when she heard what had happened. I couldn¡¯t follow what they were saying. I couldn¡¯t hear what they were saying even though they were right next to me. It was as if I was under water. In addition, my vision grew hazy, and my heart beat faster. ¡°Ophelia-sama?¡± Renee and the young maid stared at me, worriedly, and I wanted to tell them I was fine, but my voice wouldn¡¯t come out. I felt so sick that I was breaking out in cold sweat. My vision shook and turned white and then black. Ah ¨D¨D¨D. The moment I tried to talk to Renee, the floor began to distort. I felt as if my whole body was hit, but I was fascinated by the bright light that was hanging down from the ceiling, and thought indifferently, that it¡¯s beautiful. ¡°Ophelia-sama! Susanna, call the other servants! And, get a doctor as soon as possible!¡± I heard someone scream orders impatiently just before my vision went dark and my consciousness faded. Chapter 28 - Fuzzy Conscious Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles My body was so hot that it felt like it was burning. I opened my eyes while suffocating, and an unfamiliar scene showed up in my blurry vision. It was an elegant room with antique furnishings. All the antiques seemed like they would cost a hefty amount to repair if the delicate craftsmanship was damaged, so I didn¡¯t feel like approaching them even if they looked gorgeous. The pillow under my head felt uncomfortable, so this must be a room that I¡¯m not familiar with. ¨D¨D¨D Where is this? I tried to get up, but my body didn¡¯t want to move the way I wanted it to. My whole body felt as heavy as lead. I also have a headache. It felt like a sharp needle was prickling my head. ¨D¨D¨D Why am I here? ¡°Hello, Phelia. How do you feel?¡± I heard a low and pleasant voice near my ear. Who said that? I turned around. ¡°Ah, you look like you¡¯re in pain. You¡¯re sweating a lot and your face is red. You look like an apple,¡± a gentle, young man smiled softly while saying. Fluffy golden hair that was sticking up as if he had just gotten out of bed, bright eyes that remind me of the spring forest, and white skin that hasn¡¯t been sunburnt ¨D¨D¨D my best friend, Claude. He sat on the chair next to the bed and looked at my face, dressed in his usual clothes, dark brown pants and a plain white shirt. I felt like I hadn¡¯t met him in a long time, and I missed him so much that I almost cried when I remembered various things. ¨D¨D¨D I wanted to meet you. A sob escaped from the back of my throat. I wanted to meet you. I wanted to see you so much. I have a lot of things I want to tell you. Claude, I tried to call his name. But the only sounds that escaped from my mouth were wheezing sounds. ¡°You can¡¯t speak? Looks like you¡¯ve hurt your throat. Poor you.¡± When I reflexively grabbed my neck, Claude stretched out his hand and gently brushed mine away. ¡°It¡¯s alright,¡± he said softly. ¡°You¡¯ve caught a cold. That¡¯s why you can¡¯t speak. But it¡¯ll get better soon. Take your medicine and have a good rest.¡± But I hardly ever catch colds, I thought. When I was at my parent¡¯s house, I couldn¡¯t take baths, so I used to wash my body by drawing water from the well in the middle of the night; sometimes I did this on snowy and frosty nights. The water from the well in winter was cold enough to make my skin red, but once I got used to it, I didn¡¯t even get sick from it. My body became robust thanks to my harsh life. I can¡¯t believe that I would get a cold from getting wet in the rain when I¡¯ve been so healthy. ¡°You¡¯re probably exhausted. The doctor prescribed some medicine for you, so you should take it. Take another nap afterwards. If you do that, then you¡¯ll surely get better.¡± Claude got up and started preparing something at the small table by the bed. He searched for something in a paper bag, poured water into a ceramic cup and stirred the water with a glass rod. ¡°Can you get up? I¡¯ll give you a hand.¡± He held the ceramic cup with one hand and supported my back with the other. His thin arms were stronger than I had expected, and he lightly prompted my limp, weak body up. There was medicine in the cup. I drank it all up at once and I felt like I would throw up from the bitterness, so I immediately drank the water that was offered to me. The cold water slid down my throat, and I felt the burn subside a little. ¡°Where¡­ is this¡­?¡± The voice I had squeezed out was hoarse and sounded like a chicken who was being strangled. ¡°It¡¯s the mansion that my father gifted to my mother. It was built on the outskirts of Nabel, but it¡¯s located a little further from the house you married into. The Rosenstein Mansion is on the south side of Nabel, but this mansion is on the east side.¡± Claudie smiled mischievously, then he shrugged and continued, ¡°Well my mother passed away a long time ago, so I inherited this place, and it¡¯s mine now. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m sorry, Ophelia. I lied to you.¡± ¡°Lied?¡± ¡°Yes. I¡¯m not poor, and I have many titles besides painter. Claude Ritter is a temporary alias I used to live as a painter, the right me¡­ No, that¡¯s not right. I guess that¡¯s the real me. Yes, that¡¯s right. Claude Ritter is who I am. But I did lie to you about my identity.¡± ¡°Are you a noble?¡± ¡°Something like that. It¡¯s a little different.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Ah, I can¡¯t take it anymore. I went blank and my mind became hazy. Too many things happened in one day, and even if my brain could comprehend these things, my heart couldn¡¯t. I remained behind in the rose maze. My body is heavy, my headache is terrible, and I¡¯m not in any state to think. ¡°I won¡¯t tell you anymore today, neither my real name nor my real status. I don¡¯t want you to be unable to sleep.¡± ¡°Renee¡­¡± I wonder where she is right now. She dressed up as a man and rode on a horse, who the heck is she? ¡°I can tell you, but let¡¯s stop here for tonight. You have to rest. ¨D¨D¨D Renee was originally my bodyguard, and I had her slip into the Rosenstein mansion as a maid to see how you were doing.¡± So, she really isn¡¯t an ordinary servant, after all. But I never imagined that she was pretending to be a maid under Claude¡¯s orders. ¨D¨D¨D Let¡¯s stop. My brain isn¡¯t working today. I won¡¯t get anywhere even if I think about it. It¡¯ll only get more and more confusing. Like Claude had said, I should get some sleep now. It¡¯s an unfamiliar mansion, but he¡¯s here so it¡¯s safe. I¡¯m sure it¡¯ll be fine. ¡°I¡¯m glad she kept an eye on you. If she hadn¡¯t, then you would be in a tough situation right now. You could¡¯ve fainted, been attacked or killed, ¨D¨D¨D or be brought back to the mansion and placed under house arrest. I¡¯d like to lecture you for an hour or so on your recklessness, but you¡¯re sick and I¡¯ve also been lying to you so I¡¯m not one to speak¡­ On second thought, I¡¯ll say it after all. After you¡¯ve gotten better. You better be prepared.¡± I obediently obeyed Claude, who had just finished saying a lot. I relaxed and felt as if I was sinking into the bed, then I became drowsy. ¡°In any case, it was hard on you, Phelia. It was painful, wasn¡¯t it?¡± Claude adjusted my blankets while comforting me, and I thanked him. Then, he smiled as if he was troubled or sad. ¡°I¡¯ll stay by your side until you fall asleep, so don¡¯t worry and close your eyes.¡± The hand that was patting my head was pleasantly cool and felt nice. I closed my eyes because it felt comfortable, and heard a quiet whisper, ¡°Goodnight.¡± When I fell asleep, I felt something soft and warm graze against my forehead. I had a dream while I was sleeping. A dream about my mother. ¡°Your father gave me a lot of roses,¡± mother said. ¡°He gave me a lot of roses in red, white, yellow, pink and orange.¡± The side profile of my mother who had said this was weary since she had been sick for a long time, but she looked beautiful, and faint as if she could disappear at any moment, and her thin smile appeared lonely. She stared off into the distance and squinted fondly as if my father were there. ¡°I like red roses the best. Red roses as deep as the colour of blood and passion. Do you know what roses means in the flower language? Love, beauty, virtue, and passion. Isn¡¯t it wonderful? That person, your father, he gave me so much love. The red roses are proof of his love. Of course, your mother also sincerely loved your father. I loved him more than anyone else in this world.¡± My mother looked down with her hands on her chest and cried. Her tears dropped like pearls, and her body trembled quietly. I think she actually wanted my father to comfort her. She probably hoped that he would show up and hug her. But father never came. Both mother and I knew that he wouldn¡¯t come. I reached out and hugged my mother. I hugged her slim body which looked like it would break in half and her black hair. Then, she muttered, ¡°Sorry.¡± ¡°But I loved him. If my wish can come true, and if I am allowed, then I want to be by his side. I want to be with him. I love you, let¡¯s live together, ¨D¨D¨D he said that while presenting me with a bouquet of bright red roses, but we couldn¡¯t be together.¡± Even though I love you, even though you love me. Mother repeated this while I hugged her. Even so, he didn¡¯t come, and I, her daughter, couldn¡¯t take his place. I wanted to at least comfort her, so one day, I sold my long hair and brought a single rose with the money I had received. Roses were expensive when they were sold out of season, and it was impossible for me to afford a bouquet of roses. I hurried home because I wanted my mother to be happy and laugh. My heart leaped with expectations, and I didn¡¯t care that my hair was cut as short as a boy¡¯s or that the cold wind was hitting my cheeks. I rushed up to Mother¡¯s bed as soon as I got home and looked at her face. ¡°I¡¯m home, Mother. I have a present for you today. What do you think it is? It¡¯s your favourite red¨D¨D.¡± That was when I noticed that something was strange. My mother, who always greeted me with a smile, couldn¡¯t open her eyes. Her eyes didn¡¯t even twitch. The rose slipped from my hand, and I don¡¯t remember what happened afterwards. The red rose that my mother loved. The rose that was as red as blood, and passionate like a scorching heat. Where the heck did the rose that I was going to give my mother to prove my love for her go? I wonder if that freezing cold house is silently being forgotten. I opened my eyes because I felt like someone was calling me and saw Orpheus. I thought that I was still dreaming. About Mother and Orpheus. A dream about the people I love. ¡°Or¡­ pheus.¡± Black hair, blue eyes, and white skin. Ah, how beautiful he is! This person is really beautiful. Everything about him is beautiful, even his spirit and soul. ¡°Ophelia,¡± Orpheus called my name. He spoke my name with a painful and heart-breaking expression on his face. Down his cheeks were clear ¨D¨D¨D. ¡°Are you¡­ crying?¡± I raised my heavy arm and rubbed his cheeks. I wiped his tears with my index finger and my heart hurt. Please don¡¯t cry ¨D¨D¨D. I wiped my beloved¡¯s tears with love. Don¡¯t cry ¨D¨D¨D. I¡¯ll make you happy, so please don¡¯t cry. Laugh like you did on that day. ¡°Let¡¯s go home, Ophelia.¡± The warmth that covered my body disappeared, and I floated in the air. My vision swayed, and I reached out my hand in surprise to try and grab something. ¡°I¡¯m sorry I came so late to pick you up. It took a lot of time to find you. But, it¡¯s alright now. It¡¯s nothing to worry about. Let¡¯s go home together. Go home and take a good rest.¡± ¡°¨D¨D¨D Hey, you said you were just going to take a look at her.¡± Claude was standing near us before I knew it, and he put his arm on Orpheus¡¯s with a stern expression on his face that revealed that he was clearly annoyed. ¡°¡­ Won¡¯t you let go?¡± ¡°Alright. But give Phelia back.¡± ¡°I refuse.¡± ¡°Cut it out! Do you want to kill her? She still has a fever. She¡¯ll get worse if you put her in a carriage. You know this, don¡¯t you?¡± Orpheus also put on the same stern expression on his face as Claude¡¯s and was glaring at him, but he finally sighed after a while, and put me back down on the bed. ¡°Sorry. Did it hurt?¡± Orpheus looked down, gloomily. He placed the blanket on top of my cold body and rubbed my head and cheek. ¡°No,¡± I answered, and someone gasped in shock. ¡°It¡¯s not ¡°no¡±, is it Phelia? I¡¯m sure you feel pretty bad. Lord Rosenstein, please go home for today. You are also at fault for her running away from home. She didn¡¯t want to be near you. I don¡¯t have to tell you why.¡± Orpheus¡¯s beautiful face distorted as if it had cracked, but Claude continued, ¡°Don¡¯t linger around and leave already. If you¡¯re around, then she won¡¯t heal even if she could.¡± Normally, I would flare up and say, ¡°Don¡¯t speak like that,¡± but unfortunately, I don¡¯t have the energy for that right now. ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± I had no choice but to apologise for Claude¡¯s rudeness. ¡°It¡¯s fine, Ophelia. It¡¯s my fault. It¡¯s all my fault. Please don¡¯t apologise.¡± ¡°It is your fault. This wouldn¡¯t have happened if you had been more honest.¡± ¡°Stop, Claude.¡± I¡¯m the only one to blame. Orpheus, Diana, Juris, Claude, and other people. No one did anything wrong. ¡°I want to think. Please let me think about this for a little bit.¡± I still don¡¯t know what I should do. I just want to sleep right now. I¡¯m really tired, so I want to sleep. ¡°I¡¯ll come back,¡± Orpheus said as if he was begging for forgiveness. ¡°You might not like it, but I¡¯ll be sure to come back. You don¡¯t have to say anything. I want you to stay by my side even if it¡¯s just for a little while.¡± ??????? It took some time before I could fall asleep again. I stared blankly at the ceiling and Claude returned. He bowed as he apologised, ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry about the disturbance. I told him not to wake you up, but he seemed cornered in many ways.¡± ¡°Why¡­ is that person¡­ here?¡± ¡°I told him you were here.¡± Claude brushed back his quirky hair. ¡°I told him that I¡¯ll look after you here. Since it would be troublesome if he accused me of kidnapping you or caused a fuss. Well, I¡¯m sure he would attack me if I didn¡¯t tell him you were here.¡± ¡°Why¡­ did he come to pick me up?¡± Orpheus loves¡­ Wait, no. Orpheus didn¡¯t love Diana. He said that he loves¡­ ¡°Why¡­.?¡± ¡°Who knows? I¡¯m not him, so I can¡¯t answer that question. Why don¡¯t you ask him next time?¡± Claude stared at me for a while with a mysterious smile on his face, then he said, ¡°Goodnight,¡± and left the room. I fell into a deep sleep and didn¡¯t dream this time. Chapter 29 - Claude’s Real Identity Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles Two days after I collapsed, the haze that covered my head finally cleared. Suddenly, I thought it was already alright. I had no idea what was alright, but that thought immediately rose in my mind, and my heavy lids suddenly opened. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m alive. I suddenly thought. I had a slight headache and sore back ¨D¨D¨D probably because I had slept for a long time ¨D¨D¨D but the heat that was burning my body had disappeared and I felt refreshed. I felt that the antique furniture, the white lily on the window table, and the evening scene outside the window were beautiful. They were beautiful and sad. I seem to have lost something when I woke up. When I tried to remember the reason in a daze, the maid of this mansion came and looked surprised when she saw me. ¡°You¡¯ve woken up?¡± She was an elderly maid with a gentle face. Her voice was slightly low for a woman and it was strangely calming. I sluggishly sat up. My body felt heavy and it was hard to move, but I put more effort than normal and managed to move. ¡°Can¡­ I¡­ get some water? I¡¯m¡­ thirsty.¡± Perhaps because I hadn¡¯t used my throat in a long time, or because the heat had burnt my throat, the voice I had finally let out sounded cracked. It sounded raspy as if it was full of phlegm, and I sounded unfriendly and unclear even though I hadn¡¯t meant to. However, the maid didn¡¯t seem to mind, and she poured me a glass of water before passing it to me. She waited for me to finish drinking and asked, ¡°How are you feeling? Do you feel a bit better?¡± I nodded, ¡°Yes, a lot better,¡± I answered in a raspy voice and the maid smiled in relief, ¡°That¡¯s good.¡± ¡°Your throat still seems sore, but that¡¯ll get better soon. When you catch a cold, you heal faster if you have a fever. ¨D¨D¨D Shall I wipe your body? You¡¯ve been sweating a lot, so I¡¯m sure you¡¯d like to change?¡± It was embarrassing to show my skin to an unfamiliar woman, but I still can¡¯t move my body the way I want to, so I decided to get her help. Before I knew it, my pyjamas were taken off, she wiped my body with a wet cloth that had been soaked in warm water, and even moisturized my skin with a lavender-scented cream. ¡°This cream makes you feel better. It also relieves your headache. I¡¯ll wash your hair tomorrow. You still have to rest today.¡± I wanted to wash my sticky hair, but if I force myself to move and get a fever again then I¡¯ll cause more trouble for everyone. I told myself to put up with it for another night and put on the new pyjamas. ¡°How is your stomach? Do you think you can eat anything?¡± I realised I was hungry when she asked me this, so I had her prepare a simple meal for me. I waited for a while and she came back with vegetable potage and grated apples. There wasn¡¯t a lot of food, but it was perfect since I hadn¡¯t eaten anything yesterday. My throat hurt every time I swallowed, but I endured it since I needed to eat to recover. I also took some medicine after I finished eating. It was bitter and disgusting and was the worst medicine I¡¯ve ever had to drink. ¡°Where¡­ is Claude?¡± My mind started working after I finished eating and a lot of questions popped up in my mind. I had a lot of things I wanted to ask him, so I wanted to know where he was, but the maid replied, ¡°He¡¯s out.¡± ¡°He won¡¯t be back today. If you have something to say to him, then you¡¯ll have to wait until tomorrow.¡± ¡°I¡­ see.¡± I was dejected and sighed. It seemed like I had to hold the ill feelings that had swelled up within me when my head started working again for a while longer. I tried asking the maid and she laughed playfully, ¡°Please ask Master. He told me to keep it a secret for now. ¨D¨D¨D Do you need anything else?¡± I shook my head to indicate I didn¡¯t need anything and asked, ¡°What¡¯s your name?¡± ¡°My name is Monica. Monica Heather.¡± I repeated her name without letting out a sound, ¡°Monica.¡± ¡°Thank you, Monica.¡± ¡°Oh my, Miss! Those words are a waste on someone like me.¡± I looked at Monica who was smiling happily and swallowed the words, ¡°I¡¯m already married so you shouldn¡¯t call me Miss.¡± The only servant who was happy about little things like this was Claire. She always told me that it wasn¡¯t necessary for me to thank servants, and she rarely gave me a satisfying reaction. Perhaps because of that, I felt strangely ticklish on my back and couldn¡¯t remain calm. After Monica left the room, I got out of bed, sat on the chair by the window and pondered. ¨D¨D¨D Everything has collapsed. I endured the pain in my chest while remembering what had happened. What have I been doing? What did Orpheus, Diana and Juris think and how did they want to act? ¨D¨D¨D I¡­ I just¡­ wanted that person¡­ I thought Orpheus and Diana were in love. I thought that he betrayed Diana to protect his foster father¡¯s last request and married a woman¡­ married me who he didn¡¯t love. I felt sorry for them and wanted to make Orpheus happy, so I wholeheartedly acted as a bad wife and became a hateful person. I even got myself a fake lover. By doing so, I was justifying the relationship between the two of them and wanted the servants and everyone in the world to recognise their relationship. Orpheus should have been fed up with me and we would have been divorced. And it was going very well. Orpheus distanced himself from me and our relationship had gotten so cold that we couldn¡¯t have a decent conversation. If I shook it a bit, then I would have made a shock and the cracks in the relationship would have been finalised. The gears that were meshing together began to go crazy after that man came. Everything became weird after that man came. Juris protected me and Orpheus bought me from that man. He had our parent and child relationship cut off with a large sum of money. He did that to protect me. And, he said he wouldn¡¯t divorce me. He said that he won¡¯t let me go no matter what happens. ¨D¨D¨D I thought that his foster father¡¯s last request was that important to him. A few days later, I learnt of Juris¡¯s feelings. He confessed that he loves Diana and wished her happiness. I became more desperate since I wanted to fulfil everyone¡¯s wishes. I didn¡¯t care about how I was acting so that Orpheus would divorce me faster. I made Orpheus feel uncomfortable and flirted with him. I pushed Diana to make Orpheus angry. ¨D¨D¨D Because Diana said she was leaving. But everything was a farce. The tragedy drama was a humorous comedy when the lid was opened. The person Diana loves is Juris. Not Orpheus. Orpheus also doesn¡¯t love Diana¡­ Diana confessed her feelings to Juris, but he didn¡¯t accept them. He loves her, but he couldn¡¯t accept her feelings. Because they had different social standings and he couldn¡¯t think of a way to apologise to me. They both feel the same way about each other, but they were distancing themselves from each other because of their feelings of guilt towards me. ¨D¨D¨D Should I have convinced them? I was stunned and flew out of the mansion on impulse, but I had met Juris in front of the laundry room before all this had happened. Should I have tried to convince them even though I would have been a little rough and gave him reasons to accept Diana¡¯s feelings without having to separate? If I had done so, then would it have yielded a slightly different result? ¨D¨D¨D Even though I want them to be happy. I don¡¯t hold anything against them. I understand their feelings so well. Don¡¯t worry about me and don¡¯t be bound by guilt. I want you to be happy. I want you two to love each other until the end. If you don¡¯t, then the things I¡¯ve done will really be wasted. Only my sin of getting a lot of people involved and hurting them will remain. ¨D¨D¨D I wonder if I can still make it in time? Orpheus and I might not be able to fix our relationship anymore. He had said those things, but I don¡¯t deserve to be by his side. I can¡¯t stay when I¡¯ve stirred things up this much. Therefore, I want Diana and Juris to be happy. I want them to be together from now on. I just want to avoid everyone going their separate ways. By any means. ¡°What should I do?¡± I whispered as I looked out at the summery sky which was turning dark. What should I do? How do I convince the two of them? ¡°What can I do?¡± What can I do to make it up to Orpheus? What can I do to make him happy this time? ¡°What should¡­¡± I looked up at the red sky. What will happen to the clown once the curtain closes? I was only acting, but I became a real clown before I even realised it¡­ ¡°Orpheus, I¡¯m¡­¡± My whisper was sucked into the piercing silence and disappeared. The answer was, of course, nowhere to be heard. The next day after breakfast, I went to the bathroom and Monica helped me wash my hair and body. I haven¡¯t had a bath in a long time, and it felt really good. It was completely different from being wiped clean with a damp cloth. The doctor came when my long hair was dry. He examined me and said, ¡°Don¡¯t overdo it because your throat is swollen. Please rest.¡± I don¡¯t need to sleep, but he said I should avoid going outside or moving around. The doctor left and this time Claude came. He smiled brightly as soon as he saw my face. ¡°Hey, how are you feeling?¡± ¡°I¡¯ve gotten a lot better,¡± I replied while feeling relieved at seeing his friendly smile. Claude¡¯s hair was messy today as well. He wore a simple shirt and black trousers and didn¡¯t look like the master of this splendid mansion. He looked like a commoner who might be seen walking around town. ¡°Have you eaten?¡± ¡°I have. Not only this morning, but last night as well.¡± ¡°That¡¯s good. Phelia, you look fine, but you sound horrible. You sound like a wrinkled old grandma.¡± ¡°But this is still better than yesterday.¡± Yesterday, I could only emit a small voice and my words were choppy, so it took me a long time to finish talking. My voice was cracked today, but I didn¡¯t pause while speaking. ¡°Really? Isn¡¯t it hard to talk?¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine. Hmm, Claude¡­¡± ¡°Yeah. I know. Well then, I¡¯ll tell you all the secrets I have been keeping until now. I¡¯ll listen to your story too.¡± ¡°Do you have time?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t have any plans for today, so it¡¯s fine. Yesterday, I finished the work I had to do today as well. I wanted to take my time to talk with you.¡± Monica prepared tea and we sat face to face on the chairs by the window. ¡°My real name is¡­¡± Claude said with a profound smile after he took a sip of the fragrant tea which smelled like herbal tea. ¡°It¡¯s pointlessly long. My name is Claudias. Claudias Johan Schroden Valkenburg.¡± ¡°Valkenburg¡­¡± Is there a noble family with that name? I searched through my memory and froze. Valkenburg. The house who bears that name is the most precious house in this country¡­ ¡°No way.¡± ¡°Yes. It¡¯s probably what you¡¯re thinking. I¡¯m, you know, part of the royal family. The Seventh Prince, Claudias. My father is the current King, Wilhelm III, and my mother is the Fourth Queen, Elizabeth Antoinette von Schroden. My mother passed away five years ago.¡± I was glad that I had placed the white porcelain cup back onto the table. If it had been in my hand, then I probably would have dropped it and spilled tea all over the dress I had borrowed. ¨D¨D¨D This man¡­ is the Prince? The present King, Wilhelm III, has six consorts, so he has a lot of children as well. There are eight princes and five princesses but I never imagined that Claude was one of them. I froze like a stone statue from the shock and my mouth was agape. Claude asked something he didn¡¯t need to ask, ¡°Are you surprised?¡± ¨D¨D¨D So why is he still hiding his identity like this? Claude has been exhibiting his paintings in various exhibitions even after he gained a certain reputation as a painter, he has also won awards and has exposed his face in front of many people. If he were really a part of the royal family, then he would have been exposed a long time ago and people would talk about him. Moreover, the Seventh Prince patronages various art fields and he holds a public exhibition which can be called a gateway for new artists once a year at the centre of the capital for paintings. Claude and I also met at a public exhibition that was held by the Prince, but his social position should have been known to the nobles and artists. ¡°I¡¯m an eccentric who rarely shows my face in high society, and when I do appear in public, I look completely different from a painter, so most people won¡¯t realise I¡¯m the Prince even if they see me. Well, they normally wouldn¡¯t think that a member of the royal family would have messy hair and wear shabby clothes to act like a painter. I¡¯m pretending to be a painter by misrepresenting my identity and only a handful of people know about this, including the King.¡± ¡°If I didn¡¯t write to you beforehand, then you wouldn¡¯t be at the apartment¡­¡± When I finally asked the question, Claude ¨D¨D¨D no, Prince Claudias shrugged. ¡°I usually stay in this mansion and work at the royal palace. I do my work properly after all. I force my schedule open when you come to see me and go to meet you.¡± ¡°Can you do that? You¡¯re a royal, but you¡¯re pretending to be a painter¡­¡± ¡°I was going to quit if someone found out, but it went surprisingly well. I continued the act longer than I thought I would.¡± ¡°His Majesty allows you to do this?¡± ¡°Rather than allow, it¡¯s more correct to say he¡¯s given up? A lot of his sons and daughters are eccentric including the Crown Prince, so he lets us do what we want. It¡¯s fine as long as we don¡¯t break the law. It¡¯s appropriate to say he¡¯s tolerating it.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Is that what it is? I felt dizzy even though I was sitting, so I looked out the window. Perhaps because it was built in the suburbs, the garden in this mansion was as large as the one at the Rosenstein mansion. It was verdant and there were dark summer flowers in full bloom. There was a big fountain at the centre of the garden and water spouted from it without losing to the strong sunlight. ¡°Are you angry?¡± When I turned back, Prince Claudias smiled weakly. ¡°About¡­ what?¡± ¡°About me lying and hiding my social status.¡± I¡¯m not angry or anything. I was stunned since this development exceeded my imagination and I couldn¡¯t even think of any words to say. What the heck is going on? However, I couldn¡¯t continue to behave shamefully in front of royalty. I¡¯ve already done many bad things. I corrected my posture, pulled myself together and answered in a firm tone even though my voice was still raspy, ¡°No. I¡¯m surprised, I¡¯m not angry.¡± ¡°Then, will you forgive me? Will you still be my friend as you have been?¡± ¡°If that is what you wish, Your Highness, then of course. Well, I might not be a noble soon, but if that¡¯s alright then¡­¡± ¡°Don¡¯t call me that. Call me Claude like you have been doing. Those close to me call me that, so don¡¯t hold back.¡± ¡°But¡­¡± I can¡¯t do something as fearful as not calling a royal by their title. Our friendship has not changed, and my feelings towards him remain the same as before, but now that I know he¡¯s a royalty, I need to be courteous. However, Prince Claudias didn¡¯t like it. ¡°I see. So Phelia hates me now.¡± He looked up at me and my throat made a strange sound. It¡¯s unfair for a handsome person to make this expression. ¡°I don¡¯t hate you.¡± ¡°Then, call me Claude. Right now.¡± After hesitating a little, I whispered, ¡°Claude.¡± Claude, however, said something mean, ¡°I can¡¯t hear you. Once again.¡± He made me call his nickname repeatedly and I sighed in exasperation. ¡°Sorry, my bad. I¡¯m already satisfied. Don¡¯t make that face. Well, we¡¯ve made up so it¡¯s your turn to talk.¡± Claude¡¯s identity was so surprising that I almost forgot about it, but that was one of the reasons why I left the Rosenstein mansion. I took a deep breath, shifted my thoughts and explained to him what happened step by step. The feelings of the people in the Rosenstein mansion which had become clear after my father¡¯s visit. Confused by the shocking facts, I fled the mansion and ran away from Orpheus. ¡ºWhat is your happiness? What will make you happy?¡» ¡ºIf you¡¯re by my side.¡» Like Orpheus had promised, he had roses delivered to my room almost every day after it got warmer. ¡°I don¡¯t know what to do. What should I do?¡± Claude listened silently to my story, but when I was done, he scolded me for my reckless behaviour first, then he quickly changed his tone and said gently, ¡°What do you want to do Phelia?¡± ¡°I¡­ want to make amends.¡± ¡°You want to make amends? Lord Rosenstein told you to stay by his side, didn¡¯t he? He said that he¡¯ll be happy if you¡¯re there. Why don¡¯t you do that?¡± ¡°But I don¡¯t have the qualifications to stay by his side. I¡¯ve made a lot of mistakes. I¡¯ve hurt Orpheus.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t think you have to worry about it too much if the person himself says it¡¯s fine.¡± It¡¯s not fine, I shook my head. I can¡¯t stay by his side and pretend that I hadn¡¯t hurt him a lot and made him go through a lot of tough times. ¡°You know, Phelia.¡± I shook my head like a child throwing a tantrum, bit down on my lips and looked down, then something warm touched my head. Claude reached out and patted me on the head. ¡°You may be looking for an answer right now. But this isn¡¯t something you can leave to someone else. You must think about it yourself and come up with an answer. You won¡¯t be able to move forward if you don¡¯t. You¡¯ll only be left with regrets.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Ah, even this person won¡¯t give me an answer? I hung my head down. What the heck should I do if Claude doesn¡¯t give me an answer? What should I do from now on? I felt alienated as if I had been thrown out. I grasped at the skirt of my white dress that was embroidered with small blue flowers. ¡°What should¡­¡± ¡°Why don¡¯t you separate from Lord Rosenstein for now and think about it? This mansion is pointlessly big. It looks old and has antique furniture because of my father¡¯s old-fashioned taste, but well, but it¡¯s a good place to think quietly since it¡¯s calming here. You can use this place to separate from him.¡± ¡°But¡­¡± Even though it¡¯ll be a lot of trouble, I wonder if I can indulge in his words just because he¡¯s a friend. ¡°I haven¡¯t paid for the medicinal examination or medicine.¡± ¡°You don¡¯t have to worry about that, but you¡¯re still holding back. Don¡¯t worry about it. You¡¯re a troublesome kid. ¨D¨D¨D So, let¡¯s do this.¡± Claude pointed his graceful finger up and declared, ¡°It¡¯s an order. Don¡¯t leave this mansion until you find the answer. You can take walks, but you can¡¯t go back to the Rosenstein mansion. Alright?¡± ¡°Claude.¡± My chest hurt and I felt sad, and my feelings made me want to cry. Why is this person so kind? Being nice to someone like me. ¡°I¡¯ll talk to Lord Rosenstein¨D¨D¨D¡± ¡°No, Claude. I¡¯ll explain it to him. I¡¯ll meet him and talk with him properly.¡± There are some things I need to confirm and misunderstandings that I have to solve. And, I haven¡¯t apologised yet. ¡°He¡¯ll probably try to take you home; will it be alright? Can you keep your promise to me?¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine. I can. I promise.¡± ¡°Then, that¡¯s fine,¡± Claude smiled. He smiled and squinted his eyes as if he had remembered something. ¡°By the way¡­ I¡¯m returning the conversation back to my identity,¡± Claude said as he sipped on his cold tea. ¡°Your husband realised it straight away. I was dressed as a shabby painter at that time, but he bowed respectfully as soon as he saw my face. ¡ºIt¡¯s been a while, Your Highness¡», he said. We talked once at a celebration before, but he still remembers me.¡± ¡°When was that?¡± ¡°Six months ago. It was when I first started to get along with you. ¨D¨D¨D He appeared at my exhibition. He told me to break up with you. He said he was going to take action if I don¡¯t break up with you.¡± I thought it was good that I didn¡¯t try to drink my tea again. Orpheus wouldn¡¯t do something like that¡­ I choked and was surprised, but then I realised that was why Claude had used a condemning tone when Orpheus had come to pick me up. ¡°Why would Orpheus ¨D¨D¨D¡± ¡ºYou¡¯re my wife. That won¡¯t change in the future. My feelings of wanting to protect you will never change. Even if you hate me or love another man.¡»I recalled the words that Orpheus coldly declared on the day my father hit me. ¡°I told him the truth because he¡¯s Lord Rosenstein and it would be bad if he were to take action. I told him that I wasn¡¯t your lover. I told him I was helping you and faking our relationship.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry, I¡¯ve told a lot of lies,¡± Claude said. ¡°It can¡¯t be helped if you hate me and break off our friendship.¡± ¡°I won¡¯t¡­ do that. Please¡­ continue.¡± Claude nodded with a lonely and regrettable expression. Or it might have appeared that way because of the lighting. ¡°If our relationship is broken off, then Phelia might have found a real lover, and you¡¯ll be hated more. If you don¡¯t want that, then tolerate the friendship between a man and a woman. I¡¯m only interested in men, so I won¡¯t lay my hands on her. ¨D¨D¨D Is what I told him. It¡¯s well-known that the Seventh Prince is interested in men, and Lord Rosenstein knew about this. He reluctantly backed down. I also said some words that forced him to back down.¡± What words to make him back down? What did Claude say to Orpheus? But I was too afraid to ask. I was terrified to imagine how hurt Orpheus was. ¡°I, you know¡­ I always thought it was fine for you to break up with him. I wanted you to break up with that man and take things easy. I can¡¯t love someone of the opposite sex, but I can keep them by my side and support them. I can even find you someone new to marry. I can¡¯t help it since you¡¯re so pitiful and I feel so sorry for you. You didn¡¯t do anything wrong, but you were hurt and driven into a corner because that man is a moron who doesn¡¯t think about the feelings of others. I could have pointed out the mistakes and mediated between your relationship, but I didn¡¯t dare to. I thought that he would cause you more painful experiences if I had done so.¡± I couldn¡¯t say anything and just stared at the contents in the cup; at the amber liquid that was sitting in the cup like the surface of a calm lake. ¡°Actually, you know¡­ I¡¯ve always wanted to be close to you. To be close to Lord Rosenstein.¡± ¡°Huh?¡± I raised my voice in disarray and Claude violently messed up his soft blonde hair. ¡°I¡­ like men¡­ I like that kind of men. Mysterious beautiful young man. Honestly, I wanted to be Lord Rosenstein¡¯s lover, not yours.¡± ¡°Ha¡­ Huh, what? Is¡­ Is¡­ that so?¡± Claude is gay. He only loves men ¨D¨D¨D I know this in my mind, but I feel complicated when I¡¯m told that he saw Orpheus as a target. If you¡¯re that beautiful, then you will attract anyone regardless of gender. ¡°But I changed my mind every time I talked to you. They say he¡¯s impeccable, but that¡¯s only referring to his brain and appearance. He¡¯s no good as a person. How do I say this¡­? I got angrier the more time passed. I couldn¡¯t believe that he would put his cute wife through all of this. I wondered what he was thinking.¡± ¡°Hmm¡­ I don¡¯t think¡­ I¡¯m cute.¡± ¡°You are. Extremely,¡± Claude hit the table so hard that it made a sound and insisted. I was taken aback by his threatening attitude and hesitated to speak. ¡°That¡¯s why I tried to convince you to break up with him. I wanted him to be unhappy by doing so, and I wanted you to be happy this time. I wanted you to receive something much more wonderful than what you had lost. Something that would make you forget about your sadness straight away.¡± I thought it was a fruitless effort. We¡¯ve been running around in circles. Everything was in vain. ¨D¨D¨D Everyone is thinking about each other, but why doesn¡¯t it work out? I crumpled up my face to hold back my tears and a calm and sincere voice sounded, ¡°By the way, I haven¡¯t changed my mind. I¡¯ll protect you when you divorce Lord Rosenstein. One of the reasons your relationship was destroyed was me, so you can rely on me forever. I¡¯ll make all your wishes come true.¡± Claude is kind. He¡¯s so gentle that it makes me want to cry. ¨D¨D¨D But why? ¡°I¡­¡± Why do I remember Orpheus at a time like this and think of him? Chapter 30 - My Love for You Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles The next time Orpheus visited this mansion was the evening of the next day. ¡°Lord Rosenstein is here. He¡¯s waiting in the parlour room.¡± ¡°Oh¡­¡± A slender woman with brown hair which was tied up tightly said as soon as she entered the room ¨D¨D¨D it was Renee. She wasn¡¯t dressed as a gallant man today, instead, she wore a navy dress which could have been mistaken for mourning clothes and reminded me of a strict tutor. It was the same with Claude, but I felt relieved to see a familiar face in an unfamiliar place. ¡°It¡¯s been a while, Renee. Thank you for that time.¡± It was our first meeting in three days, and I trotted up to her and held both her hands in gratitude, ¡°Thank you so much for your help.¡± Her hands looked thin and supple, but it was firm like the hands of a man when I touched it. ¡°It¡¯s fine, Ophelia-sama. I only acted on Claude-sama¡¯s orders. I¡¯m sorry for pushing you when you weren¡¯t feeling well.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t worry about it. I heard from Claude that you used to be a guard, so do you normally wield swords?¡± ¡°Basically. Depending on the situation, there are times when I don¡¯t wield them too.¡± So that¡¯s why her hands are firm? It wouldn¡¯t be strange for a robust man to be a guard, but it was strange for a delicate woman like Renee to be a noble¡¯s guard, but it suited her very much to dress as a man and swing a sword. She was just like the female knights who appear in stories. ¡°Ophelia-sama.¡± I thought in satisfaction, and Renee spoke to me in hesitation, ¡°I¡¯m sorry that I deceived you about my identity for so long even though it was an order.¡± I shook my head and repeated, ¡°Don¡¯t worry about it.¡± ¡°I was surprised¡­ You never got annoyed no matter how selfish I was or how angry I was. So I thought it would be like that. I was worried that my bad wife act wasn¡¯t good enough, but I¡¯m honestly relieved to know that that wasn¡¯t the case.¡± ¡°Ophelia-sama is an excellent actress. I would have been completely overwhelmed by your performance had I not known about the circumstances beforehand,¡± she said seriously, so I couldn¡¯t tell if it was a joke, a compliment or if she had been serious. I couldn¡¯t understand the meaning behind her words, but I bowed for the time being and said, ¡°I have to thank you for a lot of things. I would have been in a lot of trouble had you not shown up on your horse when you did.¡± I couldn¡¯t control my emotions on that day, and acted on impulse, but now that I¡¯ve calmed down, I¡¯ve reflected on my actions and thought that I had done something idiotic. I was in despair and thought that it would have been fine if I was attacked and died, but I would have caused trouble for a lot of people if that really had happened, and the Rosenstein House¡¯s prestige would have fallen further. But on the other hand, I¡¯m also glad that I left that house. If I had stayed at the Rosenstein mansion while like that, then nothing good would have happened. I might have jumped out of the window in my room because of my worries. Therefore, I was thankful that Renee had come to pick me up at that time. ¡°Thank you very much.¡± ¡°You¡¯re welcome. Now, Ophelia-sama, let¡¯s go.¡± I looked at my body in the mirror and quickly checked my appearance. Orpheus isn¡¯t interested in other people¡¯s appearances or clothing, but it isn¡¯t good to look sloppy since I hadn¡¯t seen him in a long time. Today, I was wearing a black and white striped dress with a wide black ribbon around my waist. Monica did my hair for me and I had on light makeup. ¨D¨D¨D There shouldn¡¯t be a problem with the way I look. ¡°It¡¯s alright, Ophelia-sama. You look beautiful today too.¡± I looked at Renee who had just flattered me and she had a smile on her face, so I couldn¡¯t tell if she was being serious or joking. It became increasingly difficult to understand her intentions. Unlike the bright parlour at the Rosenstein mansion, the parlour in this mansion was a little dim, and it was lit up even though it was noon since there were overgrown trees outside the window. Nevertheless, it was gloomy, and the lighting brought about a calm aura when coupled with the antique furniture. There was a large fireplace, scarlet carpet on the floor, two leather sofas and a low table between them. There were two one-seaters on the side of the couch, brown cushions on them, and a lot of white flowers on the window that I didn¡¯t know the names to. I¡¯m glad they aren¡¯t roses. If those flowers had been roses, then I wouldn¡¯t be able to endure the pain in my chest and might crouch down. I might have remembered those words and started crying. ¡°I¡¯m sorry for keeping you waiting.¡± Two people were sitting on the leather couch ¨D¨D¨D my chest started beating quickly when I saw the young man with black hair. Before I entered the room, I was so nervous that my hands and feet were cold, but it couldn¡¯t be compared to the feeling of the tension that wanted to fly out of my throat and stomach. ¡°Oh, you¡¯re here. Then, I¡¯ll leave,¡± said a young blonde man sitting opposite the young man with black hair and stood up¨D¨D¨D it was Claude. Today, Claude was a completely different person. He was wearing nice clothes. He had a black vest over his white shirt and his hair was slicked back. His normal wrinkled shirt made him look like a young commoner, but when he dressed properly, he looked like a young noble. With this, I could see how people couldn¡¯t tell that he was the Seventh Prince. ¡°Good luck, Phelia. Don¡¯t overdo it since you¡¯re still sick. ¨D¨D¨D Lord Rosenstein, don¡¯t forget what we were talking about earlier.¡± Claude left and the parlour was enveloped in heavy silence. I stood idle at the entrance and stared at the flower patterns on the carpet. I felt Orpheus staring at me, but I didn¡¯t lift my face. ¡°Ophelia.¡± ¨D¨D¨D I have to say something. ¡°How do you do¡± or ¡°long time no see¡±, I could say those things as well. What I say first doesn¡¯t matter. I can even say sorry. Was what I thought, but the words wouldn¡¯t come out of my mouth. My throat felt as if it was being jammed with lots of stones. ¡°How are you? I heard that you¡¯re better, but is it alright for you to get up?¡± A pleasant low sound entered my ears. It was a sweet voice that I¡¯ve been wanting to hear. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, I really do¡­ I lifted my face, strained my voice and forced myself to speak, ¡°I¡¯m fine. I¡¯ve already healed. My voice is still a little strange, but I think it will go back to normal in a few days.¡± ¡°I see. That¡¯s good.¡± Orpheus, who had stood up before I¡¯d noticed, smiled a little and walked up to me without a sound. The door was right behind me, but it was shut tightly now. ¡°Orpheus, I ¨D¨D¨D¡± ¡°Can I hug you?¡± ¡°Eh,¡± I gasped. What did Orpheus say just now? ¡°Just for a little while is fine. I want you to let me hug you. Although you might hate me touching you¡­¡± ¡°I don¡¯t hate it!¡± I shouted straight away and averted my gaze because I felt ashamed for letting out a loud voice. ¡°¡­ I don¡¯t hate it,¡± I said once again in a very thin voice. I saw a hand timidly reach out from the corner of my eyes, and I could softly smell his perfume which reminded me of a thick forest. He hugged me with his hard, warm arms and continued to repeat my name, ¡°Ophelia.¡± I couldn¡¯t hug him back. It¡¯s always been like this. Every time he hugged me like this, I was reminded of the times we¡¯ve talked. This man doesn¡¯t love me. So, I couldn¡¯t hug him back. I just have to stay still in his arms, was what I had thought. ¡°I came here to see you yesterday and the day before that as well. However, I could only glance at you and couldn¡¯t touch you. I couldn¡¯t hug you.¡± ¡°Orpheus.¡± ¡°I¡¯m finally able to touch you and hug you. Ah, Ophelia. I¡¯m glad you¡¯re alright. I¡¯m glad your fever went down. If you weren¡¯t alright, I ¨D¨D¨D¡± ¡°I¡¯m¡­ sorry. I¡¯m sorry for leaving and causing trouble.¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine. It¡¯s my fault for saying those things. If you¡¯re stuck with someone like me, then anyone would think it¡¯s creepy and run away.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Why are you saying things like that? No one would think it¡¯s creepy if a beautiful person like Orpheus sticks to them. Most women would be happy to be with such a lovely person. ¡°But, please don¡¯t act so recklessly again. I¡¯ll say it clearly, it¡¯s suicidal for a pretty young woman to walk alone on a deserted street. If you hate me, then tell me. I¡¯ll act like I normally do and won¡¯t get close to you or talk to you.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Orpheus. I¡¯m sorry.¡± I realised once again how my actions and words have hurt Orpheus and moaned out my apologies. Orpheus stroked my head as if he was forgiving me, then he loosened his arms, released me and urged me to sit down on the couch. ¡°You want to talk, right?¡± Sitting on the soft chair, I let out a thin and long sigh so that he wouldn¡¯t hear me and encouraged myself. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯ll tell him everything. The relationship between the two of us will probably change greatly if I tell him about my wishes and feelings. I don¡¯t know if it will change for the better or worse. I felt my guilt pressing against my shoulders and back causing it to crack. Even if Orpheus forgives me, I still can¡¯t forgive myself. So, I don¡¯t know what will happen. And ¨D¨D¨D. ¡°Orpheus, I don¡¯t hate you or anything. I lied six months ago. Me hating you is a complete lie,¡± I began to confess slowly. ¡°It was on purpose. I said that on purpose. I played the foolish woman. I acted as an arrogant and selfish woman. I wanted you to hate me. I did it so you would hate me, run out of patience and then leave me.¡± A crack appeared in Orpheus¡¯s expression. I noticed that he was paled and haggard for the first time. ¡°It¡¯s not because I hate you. I did it because I wanted you to be happy. I did it so you could marry the woman you love instead of the woman who your foster father wanted you to marry. I thought that you loved Diana. I also thought that Diana loved you back.¡± ¡°That¡¯s wrong.¡± ¡°Yes, I know that now. Diana loves Juris. But, that¡¯s not what I believed at that time.¡± ¡°Why?¡± Orpheus covered his face with one hand. ¡°I¡¯ve explained that we weren¡¯t in that type of relationship many times. Diana was also desperately trying to solve your misunderstanding.¡± ¡°Because I saw your smiling face. I thought this because I saw you smile at her. It was very beautiful, and I thought that it was love.¡± I couldn¡¯t stop because I believed that. His smile was just too beautiful. I didn¡¯t know any love except for the familial love mother gave me. ¡°What¡¯s with that reason? When did that¡­?¡± ¡°That was also about half a year ago. It happened on the day when we went to Charmes Mondt, took a walk at the park, took a break at a caf¨¦ and came back. You and Diana were at the centre of the rose maze, and you two looked as if you were having lots of fun. You smiled happily at that time. You had a happy expression that was full of love.¡± ¡°Six months ago, I had a conversation with Diana¡­ after we went to town¡­¡± It¡¯s not a surprise that he can¡¯t remember. It was so important to me that I changed my way of life, but it was probably a day that Orpheus didn¡¯t need to remember. ¡°I noticed that I love you when I saw your smile. So, I thought I would pull back. I was happy as long as you were smiling. I was so happy that I felt faint. I thought it would be fine to throw everything away for you. My body, my heart, my soul, my honour, everything. I thought I could get everyone and you to hate me so much that you wouldn¡¯t care about your foster father¡¯s last request and abandon me. I thought you would divorce me. Then, you can get married to Diana. You could be happy forever that way. That¡¯s, that¡¯s ¨D¨D¨D¡± The emotions that burnt the back of my eyelids made me choke and I exhaled. I put my hand on my chest and sunk my nails in. ¡°That was my love. It was the love that I had devoted to you.¡± Chapter 31 - Anguish Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles ¨D¨D¨D If it¡¯s for Orpheus, for the person I love, then I can do anything. I don¡¯t care if people make fun of me. I didn¡¯t care if I¡¯m rejected. I didn¡¯t ask anyone to understand me. Because I knew it was comical and foolish. ¡°I love you. I don¡¯t hate you. I love you.¡± It was pointless even if I shut my eyes tightly. The burning heat overflowed from my eyes and fell between the gaps. Lukewarm water slid down my cheeks. Even though I decided that I wouldn¡¯t cry, I couldn¡¯t stop it. I crouched down and hid my face with both my hands. I hid myself so that Orpheus wouldn¡¯t see. ¡°Ophelia.¡± I knew that Orpheus had sat down next to me. I brushed away the hand that he had extended to comfort me and moved away. ¡°Don¡¯t touch me. Don¡¯t comfort me. Don¡¯t forgive me. I¡¯m not qualified to receive your kindness. I hurt you with my selfish desire after getting the wrong idea. I tormented you.¡± I¡¯m sorry. ¨D¨D¨D He grabbed my shoulders while I repeated my meaningless apologies, and my body was pulled up. He removed my hands which were covering my face, and my wet cheeks became cold. ¡°Yeah, it was painful. It was so painful that I thought dying would have been better.¡± Violent emotions swayed in his blue eyes and the instant I saw it; it took my breath away. Has Orpheus ever exposed his feelings to me like this before? He was always indifferent and expressionless so I couldn¡¯t tell what he was thinking. He has never shown me such intense feelings like this even though he has raised his voice before. ¡°I thought you regretted marrying me. I thought you wanted your freedom because you didn¡¯t want to marry a boring man with no noble blood and had no worth other than his face.¡± I could only stay silent and listen to him because he had pressed his index finger on my lips when I tried to object. ¡°You go out of the mansion, get to know this wide world and meet a lot of different people, so you should have realised that I only have superficial charm. Everyone throws themselves at me because they¡¯re attracted by my figure, status and assets, but few people wanted to know the real me. They project their ideals onto me and convince themselves that I¡¯m great at everything.¡± Orpheus¡¯s fleeting smile tore at my heart. I couldn¡¯t breathe. ¡°But the real me is an empty and flawed person. I¡¯m a boring man who no one pays attention to if I didn¡¯t have this appearance, the status of Earl Rosenstein or my vast fortune. No one except for my father, Diana, Juris and Elze.¡± ¡°I¡¯m different!¡± I grabbed the finger that was pressed against my lips, and snarled, ¡°I love all of you! It doesn¡¯t matter what you look like, or what your identity is, or how vast your assets are. I¡¯ll still love you even if you lose everything!¡± ¡°¡­ Ophelia, I¡­¡± Orpheus said regretfully, ¡°You misunderstood.¡± ¡°You weren¡¯t charmed by my face when we first met either. You weren¡¯t obsessed with status or fortune, and you weren¡¯t painted in greed like others. You looked at me quietly with eyes that were easy to see through.¡± ¡°I love those eyes,¡± Orpheus continued. ¡°I feel at ease when I see those eyes.¡± ¡°People have always refused to talk to me, and I felt trapped being watched by despairingly cold eyes, so I¡¯ve developed a skewed world view. I even conveniently misunderstood that you¡¯re a kind person and that you felt sorry for me, and that you were trying to lessen my mental burdens by taking the blame. I wanted to believe that I wasn¡¯t completely hated and that there was a reason for your actions.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not that good-natured. I¡¯m more selfish.¡± I¡¯m not a saint who can sacrifice myself for someone who I don¡¯t love. ¡°You¡¯re capable of it. You¡¯re like that.¡± Orpheus reached out, traced my head, cheeks and under my eyes. He wiped my tears. ¡°I shouldn¡¯t have listened to Diana¡¯s wish. That was my biggest mistake. I shouldn¡¯t have sympathised with her and only thought about you. I should have told you I loved you sooner. But I couldn¡¯t even approach you because I was afraid that you would become disillusioned and hate me even more. Just having you by my side was enough, and I told myself I didn¡¯t want anything else. I was a coward, clumsy and hopeless idiot.¡± ¡°No, you¡¯re not an idiot. If I had just¡­ if I had ¨D¨D¨D¡± ¡°Ophelia,¡± he called my name in a sad voice which sounded as if he was praying or pleading for forgiveness. ¡°I want you to say it again. I want you to tell me. You¨D¨D¨D¡± I said without letting him finish his sentence, and he hugged me so tight that I couldn¡¯t breathe. He pressed his lips against my cheeks and kissed the tears that flowed down my cheeks. ¡°Let¡¯s go home, Ophelia,¡± Orpheus¡¯s voice was so calm that I wanted to leave everything to him and immerse myself in his hug. ¡°Let¡¯s go home together and start over from the beginning. We¡¯ve solved our misunderstandings. I¡¯m sure it¡¯ll go well this time.¡± If I nod now then we¡¯ll probably be able to return to the starting point. We can hold hands and live happily ever after. ¨D¨D¨D But is that fine? ¡°I¡­ can¡¯t.¡± ¡°¡­¡­ Why?¡± I twisted my body and tried to get out of his hug, but he held on tighter and pressed a hand against my back and head. I pushed his arm away and tried to get away, but his thin body didn¡¯t yield. ¡°I¡¯ve¡­ hurt you. I was a nuisance to a lot of people and sullied the Rosenstein House¡¯s honour. You know this, don¡¯t you? What people say about me in high society.¡± ¡°Then just don¡¯t go out in public. You just have to stay in the mansion. I¡¯ll give you whatever you want, and if you¡¯re bored, then I¡¯ll get people to talk to you. You can continue your friendship with His Highness Claudias. I¡¯ll protect you.¡± ¡°That¡¯s not the problem. That way is useless. No one will agree.¡± I can¡¯t act innocent and be protected by Orpheus. I¡¯m not allowed to do that. ¡°Only you and I need to agree.¡± ¡°That¡¯s no good. I have to make amends¡­¡± I thought that he was going to let go of my body, but his beautiful face drew closer until the tips of our noses were touching. ¡°You don¡¯t need to make amends. Who cares about that?¡± His blue eyes pierced me, and I couldn¡¯t breathe. I was so charmed by him that shivers ran down my spine. How beautiful! ¡°I love you too. I love you more than anyone else. I will never make you feel sad again. I¡¯ll do anything for you. So please, come home. Please start over with me.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Ah, don¡¯t make that expression. Don¡¯t talk to me in that voice. I shook my head. ¡°Please¡­ give me some time to think.¡± ¡°I¡¯ve given you enough time.¡± ¡°It¡¯s not enough. It¡¯s not enough for me to get an answer.¡± Don¡¯t be moved by kindness. Don¡¯t turn your eyes away from your sins. I gently brushed Orpheus¡¯s hands away and closed my eyes. If you continue to look at me with an expression full of grief, then my heart will be torn apart. I¡¯ll be taken back to that mansion like you want. ¡°I¡¯ll stay here for a while. I want to think away from you.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± I muttered and felt like a terrible person. I held my trembling lips with my hand. ¡°Why? Why would you go that far¡­?¡± Orpheus said that much, then shut his mouth and didn¡¯t utter any more words. Clothes rustled, and the warmth went away, and a cold distance was created between us. When a part of our bodies was touching, I felt closer to him than anyone else, but now I feel like we¡¯re far apart. ¡°I¡¯m¡­ sorry.¡± I am extremely selfish and a helpless fool who is beyond saving. Even if I know this, I can¡¯t surrender myself to Orpheus. Even if he forgave me. I got a lot of people involved in my antics, caused trouble, and smeared the Rosenstein name. I can¡¯t live carefreely by the side of my loved one without atoning or reflecting on my actions. I didn¡¯t receive a reply to my endless apologies. The room was filled with tense silence, and only time flowed meaninglessly. The only thing I could hear was the sound of my breath coming out from my mouth, and when I closed my eyes, it felt like I was squatting down alone in a dark room. ¡°Alright.¡± Orpheus said heavily and broke the silence. ¡°I will respect your decision. I want to take you home right now, but I made a promise with His Highness. I will respect your wishes and wait until you can give me your answer.¡± I finally opened my eyes and released the hands which were blocking my lips. ¡°I honestly don¡¯t know if I can accept the answer you come up with.¡± Orpheus looked down. He stared blankly at the table with his hands on his knees. He looked so tired that it seemed like he would faint at any moment, so I reached out my hand to him. ¡°I hope you won¡¯t take too long.¡± I stopped moving my hand at that instant, hesitated a little, then ended up putting it down. I almost touched his back, but I felt like I couldn¡¯t even do that right now. ¡°It¡¯s like torture being away from you even though it¡¯s so unbelievable that ¨D¨D¨D our feelings are the same,¡± he said and sat up. I quickly averted my gaze. I didn¡¯t have the confidence to look him straight in the eye. I looked out the window at the gradually darkening sky and took a deep breath. ¡°Do you need anything?¡± ¡°Things¡­ I need¡­¡± Nothing, I nearly answered, but then remembered. Even if I were to let go of everything, I want to keep that ring with me¡­ ¡°The diamond ring. Please tell Claire to get me my most treasured ring.¡± ¡°¡­ Anything else?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t need anything else, but please¡­¡± I knew that Juris wouldn¡¯t forgive me for this selfish act, but I told Orpheus about Juris¡¯s feelings. I told him that Juris loves Diana and that he wanted her to be happy more than anyone else. They were both in love with each other, but their paths kept crossing like a skipped button on a shirt. However, Juris refuses to confess to Diana because he felt guilty for using me and had persuaded her to leave the mansion. As a result, Diana, who felt just as guilty as Juris, was heartbroken and decided to leave the mansion and move to the residence in the fief. She won¡¯t see Juris again and won¡¯t return to the Rosenstein mansion on the outskirts of Nabel. ¡°Juris loves Diana? He has never shown this in front of me or Diana and won¡¯t answer me whenever I ask him what he thought of her.¡± Orpheus frowned when he listened to all I had to say and sighed deeply. ¡°He also misunderstood. He thought that Diana loves you and that she would be happy by your side.¡± ¡°We all misunderstood each other and hurt each other? It¡¯s so pathetic, it isn¡¯t even funny.¡± Orpheus smiled wryly and brushed back the bangs on his white forehead. That¡¯s right, I thought and looked down at the hands which were on my knees. ¡°I¡¯m aware that no one should interfere with their relationship, but I can¡¯t stand it when I think it¡¯s my fault. Could you please persuade them somehow?¡± ¡°But Diana is a noble and Juris is a servant. There is a wall of status between them. That¡¯s the main reason why Diana didn¡¯t frankly speak about her feelings.¡± Diana probably didn¡¯t care about status. It¡¯s hard to believe that she does since she said she¡¯s happy just to be around him. However, Orpheus looked complicated and said, ¡°Even if Diana is fine with it, Juris isn¡¯t.¡± ¡°That¡¯s why I want you to convince them. And help if needed. They¡¯re both your precious childhood friends, aren¡¯t they?¡± I said clearly, and for some reason, he burst out into laughter. ¡°Wh-what is it?¡± ¡°No, I missed this. Your tone and expression right now are just the same as the you from that time. And that part of you that tries your best for others is the same as well. ¨D¨D¨D Alright. I¡¯ll try if that is what you wish. I also want those two to be happy.¡± I had averted my gaze awkwardly since I had probably said something without knowing my status and was relieved when I heard him say that. I lowered my head and said, ¡°Thank you.¡± ¡°Hmm, about Renee, she¡¯s¡­¡± ¡°I heard from His Highness.¡± Orpheus, who got up and was walking towards the door, stopped, turned around and said, ¡°I don¡¯t really care. Rather, I¡¯m grateful that she found you.¡± I, who had followed behind him to see him off, also stopped, and said, ¡°Really?¡± Apparently, Renee wasn¡¯t rebuked for faking her identity to sneak into the Rosenstein mansion. If Orpheus had been angry, then I would have begged, ¡°Please don¡¯t blame her,¡± but I didn¡¯t have to worry about that. ¡°Umm, Orpheus¡­¡± I looked up to say thank you. Then, I was startled by the beautiful face that was right next to me. Something soft grazed against my lips. ¡°I¡¯ll come again.¡± The door closed and I was left alone in the parlour. My heart was pounding, and it was starting to hurt. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, why? My body went limp when I noticed what had touched my lips, and I fell to the ground as if I was crumbling down. Chapter 32 - Seeing Claire Again Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles The day after I talked to Orpheus, I moved away from the guest room in the main wing into the detached building. Three days after I moved, Claire came from the Rosenstein House. ¡°Madam!¡± When I went to the main wing because Monica told me I had a guest, I saw Claire standing at the entranceway. Her face crumpled up as soon as she saw me, and tears flowed down her cheeks. She jumped like a puppy who had just found her mummy. ¡°I¡¯m so glad! I¡¯m so glad you seem well!¡± ¡°Claire! What¡¯s wrong?! Why are you here!?¡± When I patted her back to comfort her, Claire, who was clinging to my neck, sobbed. ¡°Master gave me permission! He gave me permission to come here and take care of you! Of course, that includes Claude-sama as well!¡± ¡°Does that mean you came here at your own will?¡± ¡°Yes! I heard that you had gone missing and that you were bedridden with a fever. I felt so anxious and uneasy even when I knew you were safe, and I couldn¡¯t stand it¡­!¡± The back of my chest gradually became warm. What a good girl she is¡­ She¡¯s worried about someone like me, and she came all the way from the Rosenstein mansion to take care of me. ¡°But I¡¯m glad! It looks like you¡¯ve gotten a little skinner, but I¡¯m really glad you¡¯re well!¡± ¡°Yes. I¡¯m fine now. I feel down, but my body¡¯s fine.¡± I gently separated myself from Claire and smiled to reassure her. I don¡¯t know if I was able to smile properly but I thought it was better than being expressionless. Claire wiped her red eyes with her sleeves while muttering, ¡°I¡¯m really glad,¡± then she sniffed. ¡°Please, don¡¯t ever do that again. If you have to do it again, then you must take me with you.¡± Her tears which had dried up began flowing out again, and the tears ran down her freckled cheeks. ¡°Please¡­ don¡¯t leave me¡­ behind.¡± ¡°Claire¡­¡± Claire sobbed like a little child. I patted her head while apologising, ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°I promise I¡¯ll never do that again.¡± ¡°Madam!¡± We hugged each other in the middle of the entrance way, but maybe because we had been hugging for so long, Monica, who was standing in the corner, spoke to us, ¡°Ophelia-sama and Claire-san. The other servants can see you here, so why don¡¯t you two talk in the room?¡± Recalling Monica¡¯s presence, I panicked and jumped away from Claire. My face turned red as I nodded. I glanced at Claire and saw that her face had turned red too. We left the entrance, walked across the garden and back into my room. ¡°Madam, please take this first. Master ordered me to bring it with me.¡± As soon as she entered the room, Claire unpacked two items from her luggage. They were a small jewellery box and a box wrapped in stylish wrapping paper. ¡°I brought you the ring you wanted. And this is perfume.¡± ¡°¡­ You brought me perfume as well?¡± ¡°Yes. Madam also treasures this, so I brought it with me just in case.¡± This perfume was something that I didn¡¯t have the chance to give to Diana. I chose this with Orpheus on that day in Charmes Mondt, but since the event that happened after was too shocking, I didn¡¯t have the chance to give it to her and still had it with me. I looked down at the two items with a complicated expression on my face after I¡¯d received them, and Claire raised her eyebrow sadly. ¡°What the hell happened?¡± ¡°You didn¡¯t hear anything from Orpheus?¡± ¡°No. Master didn¡¯t tell me anything. He won¡¯t tell me anything even if I ask.¡± I urged Claire to sit down since she was probably tired from the long carriage ride, and also sat down. I explained why I had run away from the Rosenstein mansion. ¡°No way¡­! I can¡¯t believe that Diana-sama likes Juris-san and that Master knew of this¡­!¡± Claire turned pale and screamed when she learnt of the story. ¡°Then, that rumour is a lie and we servants are terribly mistaken¡­ Ah!¡± Claire fell off her chair. She put her hands on the floor and bowed so low that her forehead was rubbing the floor. ¡°I am so sorry! It¡¯s¡­ it¡¯s my fault! It¡¯s because I believed in that rumour! I didn¡¯t check properly, so¡­! Ah, what should I do?! I am so sorry, Madam!¡± ¡°Claire!¡± I quickly helped Claire up and told her to calm down. ¡°I can¡¯t! Because I also helped Madam and acted like that and destroyed the relationship between you two ¨D¨D¨D.¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine. It¡¯s fine, Claire. I¡¯ve talked to Orpheus-sama and we were able to resolve the misunderstandings. And, you¡¯ve done nothing wrong. You helped because you thought it would be good for me, right?¡± Claire only helped me. She just wanted to fulfil my wish. She didn¡¯t do anything wrong. ¡°But!¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine. I said it¡¯s fine, so it¡¯s fine.¡± Claire looked down and seemed to be thinking, but she eventually stood up, slapped her skirt and returned to her chair. ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t apologise.¡± I passed her water to calm her down and patted her shoulder to comfort her. Claire received the glass and said, ¡°Thank you very much.¡± She took several sips to drink all the water, then she stared at the empty cup and sighed. ¡°Madam, what are you going to do from now on?¡± At that time, I stood by the window, touched the curtain and looked at the garden where the sun was shining brightly. The trees were swaying in the wind. Water spouted up high from the fountain, scattered and the droplets fell and glistened in the sun. ¡°I¡¯m thinking about what I should do from now and what I have to do.¡± ¡°Will you come back to Master? Master loves you, doesn¡¯t he? If you¡¯ve solved the misunderstandings, then this time ¨D¨D¨D.¡± ¡°I¡¯m looking for a way to atone.¡± ¡°Atone?¡± Claire widened her eyes. ¡°What are you atoning for?¡± I told her. I hurt the person I love and got a lot of people involved for my own selfish purposes. I lowered my own reputation and dirtied the name of the Rosenstein House. I should think about how to atone for those actions rather than what I should do with my relationship with Orpheus. ¡°I know it¡¯s for my own self-satisfaction. But even so, I have to atone for my actions.¡± ¡°But, how would you¡­¡± ¡°I thought I would become a nun and spent the rest of my life praying to God. Or¨D¨D¨D.¡± ¡°Y-you can¡¯t! You definitely can¡¯t do that!¡± ¡°Then, what should I do?¡± I asked back since I wanted an answer, and Claire stood up. She moved her fingers on her cup, and stared at the woman standing by the window with a puzzled expression on her face. ¡°You should talk with the Master too¡­¡± ¡°I did. But he tried to forgive me too easily. I¡¯ve also done a lot of terrible things to him too.¡± ¡°Madam¡­¡± We almost sighed at the same time. I leaned against the window frame and followed the water that was falling without sound from the fountain with my eyes. ¡°I got permission from Orpheus and Claude, the owner of this mansion, so I¡¯ll think about it until I find the answer.¡± ¡°Then, I will too,¡± Claire said with a thoughtful expression on her face. ¡°Let¡¯s think together. I¡¯ll be by your side and we¡¯ll think about this together. What can you do to atone?¡± Ah, she really is a good girl¡­ How reassuring is it just to have her by my side? I could play a hated person because of her support, and had she not been there, then I would have been broken hearted and frustrated long ago. I¡¯m a weak person who always wavers. I tried to express my gratitude when I heard a knock on the door. ¡°Who is it?¡± When Claire opened the door, the maid, Susanna, was standing there. ¡°Pardon for interrupting.¡± Susanna looked around the room and a smile appeared on her charming, round face. ¡°Would you like to have tea? I also prepared Phelia-sama¡¯s favourite lemon custard cake. There are a lot of cookies as well. The chef cooked a lot since he thought you would be happy.¡± She was the maid who ran to the front door in surprise when I was brought here. She has been taking care of me with Monica. She¡¯s a gentle person, but she¡¯s excellent at her job. She has a small and plump body and her actions are lively. Susanna pulled a tray full of food into the room and placed the tea utensils and baked goods on the table without waiting for my reply. ¡°Ermm, that person over there is Claire-san? You¡¯ll be staying here from today onwards? Oh my, you have beautiful red hair. And you¡¯re also cute.¡± ¡°Ah, eh, hm, thank you very much! It¡¯s nice to meet you!¡± Susanna, who liked to talk, moved her hands while moving her mouth just as much. Claire turned red at being complimented for her hair and her lips trembled, but she quickly returned to her sense and jumped up, ¡°I¡¯ll help!¡± ¡°Thanks. Then, could you cut the cake? Oh my, Phelia-sama, please sit down.¡± Susanna playfully turned a blind eye to what had happened, and my stiff cheeks and lips loosened. Her smile looks like Diana¡¯s and it made me feel nostalgic. ¡°If you drink tea and eat sweets then you¡¯ll calm down and feel better straight away.¡± She said as if she had been eavesdropping before, but that didn¡¯t mean that she was. She guessed my mood from just a glance. Susanna could quickly tell whether I was happy or depressed even if I hid it with a smile. I decided that I needed to change my mood. Claire must be tired as well, so I¡¯d like to let her rest. She also likes lemon custard cake. ¡°Claire and Susanna, you both also sit down. It¡¯s boring to drink tea alone, so please join me.¡± I forced the two to sit down and we drank hot tea together. Claire and Susanna immediately hit it off and were happily talking. Chapter 33 - Claude’s Suggestion Translator: Blushy The days passed calmly and quietly. I pondered while looking at the fountain which continued to spurt water even under the strong rays of the summer sunlight. Claire was by my side, and when I felt stuffy, she would talk to me, make me tea or invite me on walks. In the evenings when the cool wind blew, we left the mansion and took a walk around the neighbourhood. The atmosphere outside the mansion was different from the neighbour where the Rosenstein mansion was located; there was a lot of nature and rural scenery and it was unusual and beautiful. Claire took care of me, but Monica and Susanna also came to see me. We would have tea together, chat, ate outside and Monica, a master of embroidery, taught us how to embroider. Claude seemed busy as always and he complained, ¡°I don¡¯t have time to chat with Phelia or paint.¡± He wasn¡¯t in the mansion a lot, but when he was here, he would come to my room. Nevertheless, I¡¯m surprised that he was able to wait for me at that apartment even though he¡¯s this busy. If I send him a letter in advance saying that I wanted to meet him on a certain day, then he would always see me. He probably overdid it and forced his schedule open to meet with me. I really can¡¯t thank him enough. ¡°You look depressed. Are you okay?¡± I had secluded myself in the detached room when Claude came in and said this when he saw my blank expression. He must have just returned from outside since he was dressed up at the Seventh Prince Claudias and not as Claude Ritter; he had on a nicely tailored outfit, his hair was slicked back, and he had a black tie around his neck. ¡°I¡¯m fine. I¡¯m just thinking.¡± ¡°Then, that¡¯s good.¡± Claude, whose aura was different from usual, shrugged and smiled. Then, he sat down and calmly crossed his long legs. ¡°You shouldn¡¯t drive yourself into a corner. You have time, so you can just take your time to think.¡± I watched Claire leave the room to go prepare tea before I sat down across from him and looked down, ¡°Thank you very much.¡± ¡°Even so¡­¡± Claude looked around the room and sighed, so I tilted my head wondering what was wrong. ¡°The roses are gradually increasing. Isn¡¯t it annoying?¡± I inadvertently opened my eyes wide and my voice was muddled. Apparently, he didn¡¯t like the roses that were everywhere in the room. All these roses were delivered from the Rosenstein House. There were large vases in the corner of the room, on the shelves, by the window and on the table. Orpheus is still trying to keep his promise to me even after I¡¯ve left that mansion. He promised that he would send me roses every day once they had bloomed. It was impossible to send them every day, but once every three days, someone from the mansion would come to deliver the roses, or Orpheus would come himself. ¡°How do I put this, it¡¯s heavy. Love that is.¡± ¡°Is¡­ that so? He¡¯s keeping his promise, and I think they¡¯re beautiful.¡± There is no woman who wouldn¡¯t be happy if a man gave her flowers. The more I imagined how the flowers were prepared, the more in love with him I fell, and it warmed my heart. ¡°And I like roses.¡± ¡°Oh yes, you do. The things you have like your handkerchiefs, parasols and fans are usually embroidered with roses. The crimson ones.¡± Red roses are mother¡¯s favourite flowers, and the dazzling appearance resembled Orpheus. I like red roses because they reminded me of Mother and Orpheus ¨D¨D¨D the two who I loved deeply, along with a little sadness and pain. ¡°Well, if that¡¯s how you think, then it¡¯s fine.¡± Claire came back and made tea for Claude and I. She also knew that Claude was a Prince, and she would get nervous whenever they met, but as time passed and she got used to him, or because of Claude¡¯s persuasion, she was now able to keep her composure in front of him. Her hand, which was pouring the tea, didn¡¯t tremble. After that, we amused ourselves with our usual idle chatting, but Claude interrupted the conversation with a rare and serious look on his face, ¡°You know, Phelia.¡± ¡°What is it?¡± ¡°I¡¯m only saying if. If you were to break up with Lord Rosenstein. At that time¡­¡± Claude paused for a moment. He hesitantly closed his eyes and pressed his lips together, then opened his eyes again and put a bright smile on his face which made it seem like the serious look he had on before was a lie. ¡°Won¡¯t you become my wife? I¡¯ll make you happy.¡± I was on the verge of drinking my tea, and his question made me so surprised that I drank it down the wrong way and choked. I quickly put the cup back on the table and coughed with my hand over my mouth. ¡°Ahaha. Are you alright?¡± Not at all, I wanted to yell, but my throat was sore. I rejected the handkerchief that was offered to me and covered my mouth with the handkerchief that was on my lap. The discomfort in my throat didn¡¯t disappear no matter how much I coughed, and Claude continued without paying any heed to my coughing, ¡°Lately, the people around me are pestering me about marriage. What¡¯s more, they¡¯re involving the nobles and want me to marry a lady from a good noble family, so I thought I should settle down since they¡¯re getting annoying.¡± ¡°What are¡­ you saying¡­ all of a sudden?¡± It took me a while to recover fully, but I was angry at Claude, who was speaking clearly, and protested while wheezing and panting. ¡°Please stop¡­ with the jokes.¡± I¡¯m extremely thankful towards Claude, but this is too much. Don¡¯t add another thing for me to worry about when I¡¯m worrying about how to make amends. ¡°Well, I¡¯m being serious here¡­ Ah, don¡¯t glare at me like that. What? Do you hate the idea that much? Become my wife.¡± ¡°That¡¯s not the problem. It¡¯s not realistic.¡± He must lack common sense to marry a woman with the worst reputation in high society, low status, no backing, and once married. He¡¯ll be condemned by the public; the royal family¡¯s dignity will be damaged and the popularity of the Seventh Prince Claudias will plummet. I explained, but the smile on Claude¡¯s face didn¡¯t disappear. ¡°I don¡¯t mind since the real you is a good girl, and you¡¯re a hard worker. So, you don¡¯t have to care about that either.¡± ¡°Everyone won¡¯t think so.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t care about how everyone else thinks. If you¡¯re worried about what they think, then don¡¯t leave this mansion and just live a comfortable life here. That kind of life suits you more than a glamorous one, right?¡± I pressed my fingers against my throbbing head, and sunk into my chair in exhaustion, and he laughed, ¡°Wow, your face says that¡¯s completely out of the question.¡± ¡°Your eyes are glassy, Phelia. Your expression is amazing. Look at it in the mirror.¡± I sighed deliberately. I honestly can¡¯t understand why he¡¯s this optimistic. ¡°You¡¯re only interested in people of the same sex, aren¡¯t you?¡± ¡°Yeah. I¡¯m not interested in the opposite sex. But you¡¯re different. I¡¯m totally fine with you.¡± I have no idea what¡¯s fine. Is he saying that he doesn¡¯t see me as a woman? He said that he was interested in gloomy beauties like Orpheus, so why, of all things, is he courting a woman like me? ¡°Claude. I think of you as my best friend. You¡¯re someone who I respect and you¡¯re very important to me. I can accept most of your requests, but marriage is impossible. I can¡¯t marry you.¡± ¡°You¡¯re speaking bluntly.¡± ¡°Yes, I am. I¡¯m not going to marry anyone other than Orpheus.¡± ¡°You can¡¯t love me?¡± His beaming smile changed into a lonely one. He clenched his fist and held in his anger. ¡°I love you as a friend.¡± ¡°How about as someone of the opposite sex?¡± ¡°I gave that love to that person. All of it.¡± My feelings remain the same even if we divorce and never meet again. I will continue to love Orpheus. So, I won¡¯t remarry. Even if an extremely charming man whispered his love to me or lavished me with money. Even if I become poor and can¡¯t even feed myself every day. ¡°I see.¡± Claude smiled wryly and leaned against the armrest. He rested his chin in his hands like a philosopher and squinted his eyes thoughtfully. His aura changed and became calm. ¡°You¡¯re dedicated. I¡¯m jealous of Lord Rosenstein.¡± My chest prickled in pain. My dedication cornered Orpheus and hurt him. Sometimes I wonder if it was better not to love him rather than be this dedicated to him. If I hadn¡¯t loved him, then I could have accepted my position, not get others involved in my drama, not hurt anyone, and live his life peacefully as Countess Rosenstein. And my relationship with Orpheus would not have fallen apart. ¡°I¡¯m sorry for refusing even if it¡¯s brazen of me. If this makes you feel uncomfortable, then I can leave¡­¡± ¡°What are you saying? I won¡¯t kick you out for this. And I¡¯m the one who told you to stay here. If you¡¯re that worried, then you can forget about it.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°I¡¯m begging you, don¡¯t apologise. It¡¯s my fault for making you say those things. You don¡¯t have to worry about it.¡± I watched as Claude shrugged his shoulders, embarrassingly, and regretted that I didn¡¯t refuse him in a gentler way. I was so upset that I had refused him in a strong tone. Even though Claude is my treasured friend and benefactor. Even though he always helps me. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, what should I do? I felt bad and stared at the rose that was on the window. Red, white, crimson. I looked at the bright flowers. My temples were throbbing in pain, and it certainly felt more painful than earlier. ¡°Sorry. I¡¯ll take back what I said. Forget everything.¡± ¡°Huh?¡± I looked back in surprise and saw that Claude was in the middle of gracefully drinking his tea. ¡°Hmm, Claude. You¡¯re taking back your words¡­¡± ¡°Just keep that choice in mind. I¡¯m serious about marrying you.¡± ¡°Wait,¡± I said, and he interrupted me by raising his hand. ¡°Let¡¯s end this conversation here today,¡± he ended the topic. ¡°Anyway, I¡¯m changing the topic, but actually, yesterday ¨D¨D¨D.¡± Claude continued to talk while changing the topic as if the previous conversation hadn¡¯t happened, but I felt like he was telling me to drop it, so I could only swallow what I wanted to say and ask. ¡°Madam, you look depressed, are you alright?¡± After Claude left, I sunk into my chair and didn¡¯t move. Then, Claire, who had come back with Susanna, peeked at me, worriedly. ¡°Claude said that too. That I look depressed.¡± ¡°Yes, you look exhausted. Did something happen?¡± Susanna said. She quickly cleared the tea utensils on the table with Claire and made me blink. ¡°Well, something did happen.¡± It wasn¡¯t something I could talk to servants about, so I smiled vaguely and brushed over the topic. However ¨D¨D¨D. ¡°Ufufu. By any chance, did Master propose?¡± My body slipped out of the chair and I hit my side. Intense pain rushed to my brain and I stopped breathing. ¡°Oh dear, really?! I was just saying that but my gosh, Master!¡± Susanna hit the table with both her hands, and Claire looked between us while saying, ¡°Huh? What? Ehh?¡± I couldn¡¯t refute her because of the pain and was in agony while holding my side. ¡°So, so? What did you say, Ophelia-sama? Did you accept? I think you and Master look great together, and us servants would be happy about it, but how did you answer him, Ophelia-sama?¡± ¡°I refused. I have no plans to remarry.¡± I kneeled on the floor as if I was repenting, and told Susanna, who had linked her chubby fingers together while looking like a starry-eyed girl, clearly so that she wouldn¡¯t have any misunderstandings. ¡°No way¡­!¡± Susanna put both her hands on her plump chest and said this with a heartbroken expression. ¡°Hmm, Master¡­ I thought that Master, who is only interested in men, had finally brought home a dreamy doll!¡± ¡°Doll?¡± ¡°I¡¯m talking about you. Because you look like a doll.¡± I tilted my head while rubbing my side, but Claire nodded. ¡°I get what you mean. She makes you want to dress her up in different dresses, doesn¡¯t she?¡± ¡°Ufufu. You think that way too, Claire-san? I want to try different hairstyles on her, put makeup on her and make her wear hats¡­¡± ¡°Choose ribbons to tie around her waist and gloves for her to wear¡­¡± The two, who had completely hit it off since the day they met smiled at each other, stared at each other and smiled. I watched them warmly from the chair and thought about why I was being compared to a doll. ¨D¨D¨D Do they mean that I¡¯m quiet like a doll? Sure, I¡¯ve been quiet since I came to this mansion, but I can¡¯t believe I¡¯m being compared to a doll. Also, it might be bad to leave my hair, makeup and clothes to the servants. ¡°But it¡¯s a shame. I was looking forward to the day that Ophelia-sama married Master¡­ but Lord Rosenstein is also a magnificent beauty. His mysterious blue eyes and melancholy expression are irresistible.¡± ¡°Madam doesn¡¯t just like Master¡¯s face. She loves him.¡± ¡°Oh my! Really?! I thought it was Lord Rosenstein¡¯s one-sided love, but it¡¯s reciprocated?! That¡¯s great, but¡­ ¨D¨D¨D Huh? Then, why aren¡¯t you going home? I heard you were worrying about a lot of things, but you don¡¯t have to worry, do you?¡± Susanna, who is supposed to be a little calmer, overwhelmed me, and I muttered, ¡°It¡¯s complicated.¡± There are reasons why things aren¡¯t that simple. ¡°Really? You both love each other, but you¡¯re torn apart by the mischievous hands of fate.¡± ¨D¨D¨D Why did it turn out this way? ¡°Poor thing,¡± Susanna muttered, and I couldn¡¯t find any words to reply to her. I looked at Claire for help, but for some reason, her face was crumpled up and tears were running down her cheeks. ¡°That¡¯s right. Madam is pitiful. She¡¯s had a hard life. Even though she tries so hard.¡± ¡°It¡¯s alright, Claire-san. In romance novels, the heroine always has a hard time at first, but she becomes happy after many twists and turns. Ophelia-sama will definitely become happy. I¡¯ll lend it to you later, so read it.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I was confused and sighed softly since I couldn¡¯t keep up with their conversation. I¡¯m no match for Claire, but I don¡¯t think I¡¯m a match for Susanna either. I mean, I¡¯m overwhelmed by her energy. ¨D¨D¨D If I were bright like her¡­ ¡°Ufufu,¡± I looked at Susanna who was laughing loudly. Next to her, Claire was also laughing, and her cheeks loosened into an adorable smile. Before I knew it, my headache subsided. Chapter 34 - Diana’s Visit Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles That day, Susanna suggested that I take a stroll outside, so I did. I didn¡¯t feel like taking a walk because of what had happened with Claude the other day, so I thought about a reason to decline, and I wasn¡¯t in the mood to go on a picnic, but she forcefully said, ¡°You need a change of pace.¡± The outside of Claude¡¯s mansion was rich in nature and didn¡¯t lose to the Rosenstein mansion. Sloping fields, deep green trees that withstand the strong sunlight, hills in the distance and white smoky skies. On both sides of the path that stretched straight through, the fields were comprised of overgrown grass and tall sunflowers which swayed in the warm wind. ¡°This is a beautiful place.¡± ¡°Do you like it?¡± ¡°Yes,¡± I answered, and Susanna replied with a gentle smile, ¡°Then please stay as long as you like.¡± ¡°Claude-sama and us servants like having you here. We¡¯ll be happy if you stayed. Claire-san as well.¡± ¡°Thanks.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not joking, I¡¯m being serious.¡± We walked leisurely while enjoying the scenery, and when we approached the forest, we chose an appropriate place to sit down and spread a large cloth out on the ground. The basket that Susanna had brought with her contained: bread, sausages, ham, cheese, cakes and other food as well as wine. She quickly arranged them on the cloth, and Susanna, Claire and I ate together while talking. ¡°Claire-san, can you drink wine?¡± ¡°Just a little.¡± I don¡¯t talk much at times like this. If it had only been Claire and I, then we wouldn¡¯t have much to talk about and it would be quiet, but since Susanna was here, it was lively, and I didn¡¯t need to talk. Come to think of it, I went out on picnics a lot not long after I married. Orpheus and I brought simple meals with us, took horses to the suburbs and sat under the shade to enjoy our food. He was always kind to me¨D¨D¨D. I recalled the past that I couldn¡¯t go back to, and my chest hurt. I suddenly felt hurt. I¡¯m really¨D¨D¨D. I shook my head and denied the idea that came into my mind. I¡¯m starting to get impatient. Ten days have passed since then, but I still haven¡¯t come up with an answer. I came up with various ways to atone, but they all contradicted, so I couldn¡¯t come up with a decision. I¡¯m lost. Rather, it¡¯ll be easier if I can just plough through and get it over with¨D¨D¨D. Why must humans, why must I be like this? Is it my troublesome nature? The more I think about it, the more I hate myself. I chewed on my bread and drank my wine as I listened to the odd conversation that the two maids were having which differed from my thoughts. I sat in the shade and peeked up at the light that was shining in through the leaves. I listened to the birds chirp. ¡°Why don¡¯t we go to look at the brook after we¡¯re done with eating? It¡¯s just over there. It¡¯s small, but fish live in there,¡± Susanna said as she passed Claire a ham and cheese sandwich. Claire¡¯s eyes sparkled and she yelled in excitement, ¡°Madam, let¡¯s go!¡± Let¡¯s stop thinking for now ¨D¨D¨D. Susanna and Claire are having fun, but if I continue to worry and show a gloomy expression on my face, then I¡¯ll spoil the picnic. And, I¡¯ll also feel bad towards Susanna, who had invited me out. ¡°Alright. Let¡¯s go,¡± I put a smile on my face and pretended that I was having fun and said in a cheerful voice. When I got back from the picnic, Monica was waiting for me and informed me, ¡°You have a visitor.¡± ¡°Is it my¡­ husband?¡± ¡°No. It¡¯s a young lady named Diana Forst. Lord Rosenstein¡¯s cousin.¡± No way, I can¡¯t believe Diana¡¯s here ¨D¨D¨D. I was surprised. She rarely went out of the house, so it must be something serious. I gave Claire my parasol and hat and rushed to the parlour. ¡°Diana!¡± A blonde woman was sitting on a leather couch in the middle of a dimly lit room with orange lights. When I called out to her, she stood up like she had snapped, and turned her face towards the entrance of the room. ¡°Ophelia?¡± ¡°Yes, that¡¯s right.¡± I quickly crossed the room, stood in front of Diana and took her hand so that she would understand that I was right in front of her. ¡°You surprised me. Did you come by yourself?¡± ¡°No. Marion is with me.¡± Behind the couch stood Diana¡¯s maid, Marion, and she bowed at me when our eyes met. ¡°It¡¯s been a while, Ophelia. How are you?¡± I didn¡¯t know how to answer, but I said, ¡°I¡¯m fine.¡± ¡°How about you Diana?¡± ¡°I want to say that I am, but I¡¯m not really.¡± I looked at Diana¡¯s white face and feebly replied, ¡°Is that so?¡± She always had a bright smile on her face like a sunflower, but she was barely smiling now, and she lacked her brilliance. ¡°So, why are you here today?¡± I had Diana sit down since she looked like she was going to faint at any moment and sat down on the couch across from her before asking. ¡°I really wanted to see you before I left the mansion.¡± I dropped my shoulders when I heard those words. Left the mansion ¨D¨D¨D. She hasn¡¯t changed her mind after all? She probably didn¡¯t listen to Orpheus¡¯s persuasions. There was a knock at the door and Monica appeared, so Diana shut her mouth. Monica was only bringing tea for us, so she put it on the table, bowed, and left the room as soon as she could. ¡°I read¡­ your letter.¡± A short while after Monica left, Diana looked down and said in hesitation. ¡°I have to apologise to you again. I¡¯m sorry, Ophelia. I¡¯m so sorry.¡± ¡°No, it¡¯s fine.¡± To tell the truth, I sent a letter to Diana and Juris three days ago. I told them what I¡¯ve been thinking, and what I was trying to accomplish. I frankly told them everything. I told them that I didn¡¯t blame them, what I wanted the two of them to do, and also about my hopes. I had asked Orpheus to persuade them, but I thought that there would be parts that wouldn¡¯t get through to them, so I wrote them both a letter. ¡°I can understand your feelings so well that it hurts. Will you not change your mind after all? Orpheus also¡­¡± ¡°Yes, he spoke to me. He told me that if I¡¯m prepared to throw away my status, then I should get married to Juris. He said he would help me if needed.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sure you¡¯re prepared to throw your status away.¡± ¡°Of course. If I could be with him, then whether it be my status or everything I have, I can give them all up. Well, from the moment I lost my eyesight and parents, my status is nearly non-existent,¡± she said and looked into the distance. Her light blue eyes flickered with sadness. Is she remembering the days when she lost her important things one and another, then fell into despair and sorrow? ¡°Then¨D¨D¨D.¡± ¡°No. I told you, didn¡¯t I? We can¡¯t let ourselves feel good while we ruin the relationship between you and Orpheus. I¡¯m a selfish and hateful woman who used your feelings, but that doesn¡¯t mean I¡¯m not sensible. My plans dragged out longer than I expected, but I¡¯m leaving that mansion tomorrow.¡± I sighed. Why are they so against it when the person who was used said that she didn¡¯t blame them and wants them to get married? If she feels guilty towards me, then she should grant my wish and not seclude herself in the mansion at the fief. ¡°Was what you did really that bad? You only wanted to stay by the person you love.¡± ¡°Then, I¡¯ll say the same thing to you. Was what you did so bad? You only wanted Orpheus to be happy.¡± ¡°You and I are completely different,¡± I objected in irritation. ¡°In my case, it was just a misunderstanding, and my methods were wrong.¡± ¡°That¡¯s similar to what happened with me. I misunderstood things, and used the wrong methods,¡± Diana said, then smiled wryly. She fumbled around for the cup and drank the lukewarm tea quietly. In the meantime, I stared at the flowers by the window. The stunning blue flower looked like spiderwort. ¡°Ophelia, I also understand your feelings so well that it hurts,¡± she said, and I turned back. Diana, who had stopped smiling, looked serious. ¡°I know that you feel guilty about something. I can tell you not to care about outsiders, and go back to your normal self, but you won¡¯t listen, will you? You have always been like this.¡± ¡°I understand your feelings so well that it hurts,¡± Diana repeated. ¡°I know what kind of person you are. I know, that¡¯s why I¡¯ll say this. It doesn¡¯t matter if it¡¯s cowardly or if people speak ill of you. ¨D¨D¨D Go back to Orpheus and start over.¡± ¡°Wait,¡± I leaned forward. ¡°I¡¯m in the middle of thinking about how to make amends, we can¡¯t start ¨D¨D¨D.¡± ¡°If you start over with Orpheus, then I¡¯ll marry Juris.¡± Ah, is that so ¨D¨D¨D? I finally realised Diana¡¯s purpose. She didn¡¯t come here to say goodbye, but to bring me back. Knowing full well how she could move me. I felt dizzy even though I was sitting down and fell back. I wanted to scream at her and tell her she was being unfair, but I couldn¡¯t move my body like I wanted, and could only stare at her in amazement. ¡°If you won¡¯t start over with him, then I¡¯ll leave tomorrow as planned. I decided this after talking it over with Juris. We thought it was better if we grant your wish instead making amends for our own self-satisfaction. We thought that we shouldn¡¯t hurt you any more than this by acting against your wishes.¡± Make amends or have the two be happy? If I were asked to choose, then of course I would choose the latter. As Diana said, we can¡¯t destroy someone¡¯s life for the sake of making amends. ¡°No matter what, this method isn¡¯t fair. Why did Juris also agree¡­?¡± ¡°I know. It¡¯s a cowardly threat. But, if I don¡¯t do this, then you won¡¯t come back. You won¡¯t return if I use logic.¡± ¡°I haven¡¯t atoned for anything yet.¡± ¡°You can just think about that slowly after you return.¡± No way, I can¡¯t believe that Diana would choose this method to force me to start over with Orpheus ¨D¨D¨D. I closed my eyes and covered my face with both my hands. My stomach sunk and I felt nauseous. ¡°Say, Ophelia. Do you like me? Do you still think of me as a friend?¡± ¡°I¡¯ve never hated you. That was all an act.¡± It was unavoidable that I couldn¡¯t contain my low voice. I was desperate. I racked my brains on how I could persuade Diana. ¡°But I can¡¯t say that we¡¯re friends. I pushed you.¡± ¡°I¡¯m lucky that you only pushed me. I wouldn¡¯t have complained even if you beat me up to the point that my face changed.¡± ¡°I didn¡¯t push you with that intention in mind.¡± ¡°I know. It¡¯s just a joke.¡± Diana giggled and I lightly glared at her. However, it didn¡¯t concern her at all since she couldn¡¯t see. ¡°We can be friends again, right?¡± ¡°If you forgive me.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not in the position to decide that. I should be the one who is begging for your forgiveness, but you won¡¯t accept it no matter what even if I did. ¨D¨D¨D Of course.¡± Well, I¡¯ll coerce her to marry with that condition. ¡°If you want me to be your friend again, then marry Juris and let me atone,¡± I could say. It¡¯s a cowardly deal, but Diana started it. I won¡¯t let her complain. However, Diana had the better end of the deal. ¡°Say, Ophelia. If you like me, and you¡¯re my friend, then you¡¯ll wish me happiness, right? If you go back to Orpheus, then I¡¯ll stay by Juris¡¯s side. So please.¡± I couldn¡¯t say anything when she stared at me with her moist dim eyes. It felt as if she was holding onto my heart and I felt like choking. ¡°Please, Ophelia.¡± Diana is cunning. She¡¯s cowardly. It¡¯s really unfair of her to beg this of me with that expression on her face. Speaking of which, she¡¯s awful since she knew that I couldn¡¯t refuse so she¡¯s doing it on purpose. ¡°That¡¯s not fair, Diana.¡± ¡°Yes, I know. But we¡¯ll make no progress if things stay the way they are. You can hold a grudge against me.¡± ¡°At least give me time to think.¡± ¡°No. Give me an answer now.¡± ¡°I¡¯m leaving tomorrow.¡± Diana was relentless. She drove me into a corner with her angelic smile. Diana is serious. I can tell from her eyes. If I refuse, then she¡¯ll leave the Rosenstein mansion tomorrow like she had declared. And she¡¯ll never come back. She won¡¯t see Juris either. In other words, this is my defeat. I had no choice but to say that I will return to Orpheus. The ten days that I spent worrying about how to atone have gone to waste. ¡°Alright. If you¡¯re that worried about it, then I¡¯ll extend my departure for a day. Give me an answer by tomorrow.¡± Diana compromised a little since I was struggling to answer her for a long time. However, this didn¡¯t change the fact that she had checkmated me. She had only given me time to prepare myself. ¡°I¡¯ll be waiting.¡± Marion pulled Diana and they both left the parlour. I also got up sluggishly and followed after them to see them off. I felt bad and my legs were wobbling. ¡°Uh, Madam.¡± Claire was waiting outside the door. She bowed at Diana who had come out first, then ran up to me. ¡°What¡¯s wrong, Claire? That box¡­¡± The box that Claire was carrying carefully was the perfume that I hadn¡¯t been able to give to her and was holding onto this whole time. ¡°I brought it here because I thought this would be the only time you could give it to her, but did I do something unnecessary?¡± What a smart girl ¨D¨D¨D. ¡°Thanks,¡± I said and patted her head. I wanted to hug her since she waited in the corridor for this, but I held back since Diana and Marion were here. ¡°Diana. I have something to give to you. Take it.¡± I stopped her before she rode on the carriage and handed her the perfume. ¡°What is this?¡± ¡°It¡¯s something that I wanted to give to you. Please open it when you get back to the mansion.¡± ¡°Umm, Ophelia-sama,¡± Marion, who stood behind Diana and remained quiet, stepped forward and said. She stared at me and bowed deeply. ¡°I¡¯m sorry that I was rude to you at that time.¡± She was probably referring to when I had pushed Diana and she had cussed at me. She had certainly forgotten her position as a servant when she had said those words, but I was the one who had made her say them, and I couldn¡¯t blame her since she had done that to defend her mistress. ¡°Don¡¯t worry about it. You only did what was expected of you as Diana¡¯s maid.¡± However, Marion¡¯s face stiffened even though I had forgiven her. She hung her head down as if to say that she couldn¡¯t face me any longer. ¡°Marion?¡± ¡°Can you forgive me again for making an impertinent remark?¡± ¡°¡­ Yes.¡± ¡°I would also like to ask you to please come back. Come back and stay by Master¡¯s side.¡± ¡°You also think I should do that?¡± She nodded. I couldn¡¯t agree and could only smile vaguely. Chapter 35 - Resolution Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles When I saw that Diana and Marion had left out through the gate, I depressingly returned back to my room. ¡°Claire, thank you for bringing the perfume. I was finally able to pass it to her thanks to you,¡± I thanked her again and Claire became bashful. Then, she suddenly changed and looked serious, ¡°Umm, Madam¡­ What did you talk to Diana-sama about?¡± Oh right ¨D¨D¨D. I recalled my conversation with Diana and sighed in front of Claire who was staring at me anxiously. ¡°She told me to return to Orpheus if I want her to marry Juris. She wants my answer by tomorrow. If I refuse or don¡¯t answer her, then she¡¯ll leave the mansion the day after tomorrow. ¡°Excuse me¡­?¡± Claire widened her eyes, and her mouth was agape, but she returned to her senses and said while staring at me in astonishment, ¡°Th-that¡¯s¡­ Diana-sama also bravely took the plunge.¡± I walked around the room restlessly, but I quickly felt tired, so I sat down on the bed and fell backwards. ¡°It¡¯s good that she did, but she¡¯s surprisingly stubborn about it. She¡¯s the type of person who doesn¡¯t listen to anything else once she¡¯s made up her mind.¡± ¡°Madam, umm¡­¡± Claire said. She lowered her eyes and put her hands uneasily on her chest. ¡°What are you going to do?¡± ¡°Let¡¯s see¡­¡± I relaxed my body and sunk into the blankets. It¡¯s hard to convince Diana. I have no choice to but to go back to the Rosenstein mansion like she told me to and start over with Orpheus. I can¡¯t let Diana and Juris¡¯s lives and happiness be ruined because of atonement. And, more importantly¡­ I moved my face and stared at the sky through the window. ¡°The truth is¡­ I know.¡± What a beautiful blue sky, I thought. The way the clouds drifted away was so peaceful and contrasted how I was feeling so much that I wanted to laugh. ¡°I know that I should stop saying annoying things and go back to start over with Orpheus. That way, everything will fall into place, and the foolish actions that I have taken will become a funny story in the future.¡± I know this, so I couldn¡¯t talk back to Diana. The moment she brought up her terms, I knew that I had lost. ¡°Madam.¡± I saw that Claire was surprised and raised the edge of my lips up slightly. ¡°In the end, it¡¯s my own troubles. I want to atone for my sins because I can¡¯t forgive myself. I couldn¡¯t help but blame myself since none of those things would have happened if I had been more level-headed.¡± I can¡¯t pretend that nothing had happened and live by Orpheus¡¯s side. But those are my own problems, and it would be fine if I just shake free from them. Should I shake off my guilt? Or swallow it down and continue to endure it until the day I¡¯m gone¨D¨D¨D? ¡°Actually, I already know how I can atone. I didn¡¯t have to think about it in the first place. There are only so many ways I can atone.¡± Divorcing Orpheus after paying back the money I had wasted away and leaving the Rosenstein mansion doesn¡¯t make up for my actions. It¡¯s pointless to enter a monastery and pray to God. There is only one thing I can do to atone. ¡°I have no choice but to go back to that house and start over again. I have no choice but to explain my actions to the people who I got involved, apologise until they forgive me and restore my reputation and the honour of the Rosenstein house in social circles. I have no choice but to clear my name myself.¡± It¡¯s easy to put it into words. But doing it is going to be difficult. If it weren¡¯t for the title of Countess Rosenstein, then I would have been expelled from high society a long time ago. I might only receive unreasonable criticism no matter how well-behaved I am, how harmonious my relationship with Orpheus is, or how much I devote myself to charity work. Still, I have to do this¡­ I sighed again and sat up. ¡°And I¡¯ll make Orpheus happy this time. I¡¯ll love him as much as I can and give him my all. That¡¯s the only way I can atone.¡± I finally had the answer. I know how I can atone. It will be far harder than acting as a bad wife. It¡¯ll probably take a long time and be mentally draining. But I¡¯m confident that I can endure any hardship. If I can be by his side and he smiles at me even a little bit, then I¡¯ll do whatever it takes. I¡¯ll even crawl in mud. ¡°If you have your answer, then why did you do that? Master is waiting for your return. He wants to start over with you, Madam.¡± ¡°I know.¡± Even though I knew the truth and even though I understood all this calmly in my head, I didn¡¯t go back even though Orpheus asked me to ¨D¨D¨D and kept saying that I wanted to think of a way to make amends because¡­ ¡°Maybe I just wanted to be punished. Punished for my foolishness.¡± Orpheus, Diana, Juris, Claire, and Claude;¡­ Everyone around me are good people. No one blamed me. They even said that it wasn¡¯t my fault and that they were the ones who were at fault. However, I didn¡¯t think that way. I was probably the worst of us all. I wanted them to blame me, not easily forgive me. I wanted to be criticised. I wanted to be punished. No one did that, so I felt that I had no choice but to criticise and punish myself. ¡°I was trying to figure out a way to be unhappy instead of how to atone, I wanted to find a way to make myself unhappy and suffer. Diana said that I was ¡®atoning for my own self-satisfaction¡¯, and in my case, that¡¯s exactly what it was.¡± ¡°No way¡­¡± It¡¯s warped. I¡¯m warped. That way of thinking isn¡¯t normal. I¡¯m abnormally warped. ¡°I¡¯m warped. There¡¯s a lot of things about me that aren¡¯t right. Even if I can usually hide it well, my real personality, the warped parts of me, come out at times like these.¡± ¡°Still, I¡­!¡± Claire exclaimed loudly. When I looked up in surprise at her sudden exclamation, her small body had approached me, and she clung to my neck vigorously. ¡°Cl-claire?!¡± No matter how petite she was, I couldn¡¯t catch her. I was pushed back while Claire was clinging to me. ¡°Still, I like you, Madam! I also like your warped personality! It¡¯s not just me, but Master should love it too! It doesn¡¯t matter if you¡¯re warped or a bit different from other people! You are you!¡± It never occurred to me that a day would come when I would be pushed down by someone of the same sex. I was so stunned that only half of Claire¡¯s encouraging words reached my ears. ¡°Er-errrm, umm¡­¡± ¡°Madam has already tasted a lifetime of misery! You¡¯ve already had a hard time! So that¡¯s enough! I¡¯m begging you, don¡¯t think that way! Don¡¯t suffer alone!¡± Ah, what a good girl she is ¨D¨D¨D. She¡¯s always there for me and cheers me up. She always says warm words to me and saves me. ¡°Thanks. Thanks, Claire.¡± ¡°Madam¡­. ¨D¨D¨D Huh, woah! I¡¯m sorry! I am so sorry!¡± Claire turned bright red when she finally realised what she was doing, and quickly jumped off the bed. ¡°A-are you alright?! Did you get hurt?!¡± ¡°Yeah, I¡¯m fine. I was surprised, but I¡¯m fine.¡± As she helped me get up, a strange urge rose up out of nowhere. Normally, I would swallow it down or endure it, but as soon as I remembered Claire¡¯s drastic action, I snapped. ¡°Fu, fufufufufufu.¡± ¡°Uoah, I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°Fufufu. It¡¯s fine. It¡¯s fine, Claire. You were cheering me up. Thanks.¡± How many years has it been since I¡¯ve laughed out loud? My depression was completely blown away thanks to her. Me brooding over things was like a lie. I only just laughed a little ¨D¨D¨D. Claire loitered around while covering her reddened face with her hand, then she suddenly stopped and approached me. ¡°Claire, you don¡¯t have to worry about what happened earlier ¨D¨D¨D.¡± ¡°Madam, let¡¯s go back home.¡± There was sincerity in her dreamy amber eyes. ¡°You don¡¯t have to worry now that you have your answer. Let¡¯s go back and start over from the beginning. Do it for Master, Diana-sama and Juris.¡± A small hand, which was rough and showed evidence of hard work, reached out and wrapped around my pale hand. ¡°I know that it¡¯s not easy to apologise to a lot of people and restore your honour, but I¡¯m sure you can do it. And I¡¯d like to help you as much as I can. Madam, you love Master and have been working hard to make him happy, so let¡¯s make it through to the end. Even if a lot of things happen in between, it¡¯s all good as long as the results are good.¡± ¡°It¡¯s all good as long as the results are good¡­¡± ¡°That¡¯s right.¡± Claire nodded and smiled mischievously. ¡°It¡¯s taken me a long time, but I wonder if he¡¯ll forgive me.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sure he¡¯ll forgive you.¡± I stood up and looked around the room. Red, white, yellow, light pink and orange. The roses that Orpheus had given me were blooming in vivid colours and were fragrant. I really want to see him. I want to see him. I want to meet him and tell him how I feel. ¡°I haven¡¯t made up my mind yet. But I¡¯m done dwelling on it,¡± I declared to myself, not anybody else. I¡¯m done dwelling on it. I¡¯ll look forward even if I have to force myself to do so. I¡¯m prepared. That¡¯s what I have to do now. I won¡¯t hesitate anymore. ¡°I¡¯ll go back. Go back and start over. I¡¯m going to make that person happy this time.¡± Claire and I immediately started to pack our bags. If Orpheus would allow it, then I¡¯ll return to the mansion tomorrow. I wanted to tell Claude all this right away, but unfortunately, he wasn¡¯t home, so I asked Susanna to let me know when he got home. Susanna came to inform me that he was back when Claire was getting dinner ready. ¡°Master has returned. He¡¯s in the study.¡± I nodded while worrying about what to do with the roses and exchanged glances with Claire. ¡°I don¡¯t think it¡¯ll take that long. I¡¯ll go talk to him.¡± ¡°Understood. I¡¯ll see you soon, Madam.¡± I went out of my room as Claire and Susanna saw me off and walked across the dark garden to get to the main wing. I wonder how Claude will react ¨D¨D¨D. With that thought in mind, I knocked on the door of his study. He quickly replied and I was given permission to enter, so I pushed the heavy door open. His study was brightly lit despite it being night-time. A big chandelier hung from the ceiling and a number of candles were burning brightly. ¡°Ah, Phelia, it¡¯s you?¡± Claude leaned against the massive desk and his face grew gloomy as soon as he saw me. I wonder what happened ¨D¨D¨D. It¡¯s unusual for him to make a face like that since he¡¯s usually cheerful. I was going to ask him what happened, but I apologised when I realised that the old butler was by his side and that a person was sitting on the coach in front of his desk as well. Apparently, he was in the middle of something. ¡°I¡¯ll come back later ¨D¨D¨D,¡± the person sitting on the coach stood up and turned around just as he said that. He was a medium built man dressed in a black uniform, and he looked familiar. He was Daniel, a servant of the Rosenstein House. ¡°You¡­ Why are you here?¡± Daniel bowed politely and glanced at Claude. Claude nodded and Daniel took a step forward. ¡°Phelia, I need you to calm down and listen to me.¡± I already had a bad feeling at the moment. Claude looked unhappy, and Daniel looked extremely depressed. Something bad must have happened. ¡°What¡­ is it?¡± Did something happen to Orpheus ¨D¨D¨D? ¡°Lord Rosenstein¡¯s cousin has gone missing.¡± ¡°Huh¡­ Cou¡­ sin¡­?¡± The moment I understood the meaning of what he had said, my whole body made a noise and blood drained from my body. ¡°You¡¯re¡­ joking, right?¡± I tried to laugh, but couldn¡¯t. Claude looked away awkwardly. ¡°No way,¡± I shrieked. ¡°How can Diana¡­ I just met her at noon¡­¡± ¡°She was abducted by someone on her way back from this mansion. Along with the carriage. People at the Rosenstein mansion and the guards have been searching for her, but they only found the coachman¡­¡± Claude said that much before cutting his words off unnaturally and then fell silent. ¡°What is it? Continue. Tell me.¡± ¡°The coachman had been killed. They killed him and dumped him on the side of the road.¡± Ah, why ¨D¨D¨D? My vision wobbled and I couldn¡¯t stand up straight. Someone called my name, and I saw Claude rushed towards me. ¡°Are you alright? ¨D¨D¨D Marcel, bring me a chair.¡± Before I knew it, he was grabbing my arms and holding me up so I wouldn¡¯t collapse on the floor. I exhaled as I sat down on the chair that the butler had brought me and pressed my hand against my palpitating chest. Why ¨D¨D¨D? Why did this happen? Diana was supposed to marry Juris and have her long held wish come true. She was so close to being happy. And yet ¨D¨D¨D. I was also determined to start over with Orpheus for her ¨D¨D¨D. ¡°It¡¯s¡­ my fault. This happened because I wrote her a letter.¡± Diana would never have come to visit me if it hadn¡¯t been for that letter. She wouldn¡¯t go missing on her way home either. So, it¡¯s my fault. It¡¯s my fault. ¡°Why, Claude? I¡­ I¡­¡± ¡°It¡¯s not your fault. Phelia, it¡¯s not. It¡¯s the kidnappers¡¯ fault. You didn¡¯t do anything wrong.¡± ¡°Who¡­ who the heck would¡­ Why Diana¡­?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know. Lord Rosenstein has many enemies, and it might simply be a ransom. Everyone knows that he keeps his cousin by his side and looks after her.¡± I don¡¯t remember much about what happened after. After a few comforting words from Claude, he accompanied me back to my room. Claire and Susanne were waiting for my return and had prepared dinner in my room, but I couldn¡¯t bring myself to eat and just collapsed into a chair. They both desperately tried to say something, but when I didn¡¯t reply, Claude explained what had happened to them. ¡°I¡¯ll let you know if there¡¯s any progress,¡± he said before going back to his study straight away. ¡°Madam,¡± I looked up when I heard the weak voice and saw a worried-looking Claire kneeling by my chair. ¡°I¡¯m fine,¡± I wanted to say, but my voice wouldn¡¯t come out. I couldn¡¯t even force myself to smile even though I was good at it. When I pressed my forehead and looked down, a steaming cup of tea was offered to me. ¡°Ophelia-sama, please drink this. It¡¯ll calm you down a little,¡± Susanna said. I nodded weakly and took the cup, then sipped on it. Susanna had made me a cup of tea with brandy. It wasn¡¯t too hot, so I drank it all at once. As the warmth flowed through my body, my throat moistened, and my heart palpitations calmed down. My stagnated thoughts began to move again. ¡°Thanks. Like you said, I¡¯ve calmed down a lot.¡± The alcohol took away my tension and I was finally able to smile. ¡°I¡¯m sorry for being absent minded. I¡¯m fine now.¡± Being upset won¡¯t make things better. There¡¯s no point in blaming myself. Instead of regretting what had happened, I should stay positive and think about what I can do to help. ¡°I¡¯m¡­ going to eat. I need to eat dinner and get my brain going. ¨D¨D¨D Claire, I¡¯m sorry, but can you pack the rest of the things yourself?¡± ¡°Understood.¡± ¡°You¡¯re packing?¡± Susanna said. She didn¡¯t know that I had made up my mind and tilted her head wondering why I was doing such a thing. ¡°No way, Ophelia-sama¡­ Are you going back?¡± ¡°Yes. I have to go back and support Orpheus. That was what I was originally going to do.¡± Susanna widened her eyes, but she eventually smiled faintly and said, ¡°I see.¡± ¡°You¡¯ve made up your mind, haven¡¯t you?¡± ¡°Yes. I wanted to talk to Claude about this, but I couldn¡¯t in the end. I never imagined that something like this would happen.¡± ¡°Shall I tell him?¡± No, I shook my head. It¡¯s a very important conversation. I have to tell him with my own mouth instead of leaving a message. ¡°I don¡¯t think I¡¯ll have time to talk to him today, or tomorrow morning.¡± I was still upset. My heart was raging, and my limbs were trembling. My stomach felt heavy. ¨D¨D¨D But for now, I¡¯ll do what I can. I¡¯ll eat well and get a good night¡¯s sleep to build up my strength. Tomorrow, I¡¯ll tell Claude my decision and go back to the Rosenstein mansion to support Orpheus. I hope Diana and Marion are okay. Those are the only things I can do now. I reached the table where the food was laid out and picked up a knife and fork, then I forced the appetiser into my mouth that didn¡¯t want to open. Chapter 36 - Kidnapper Editor: delishnoodles I didn¡¯t overthink while Claire and Susanna were around. However, I got them to leave and got into bed, and when I closed my eyes, I was overcome with despair and a sinister feeling, and spent a sleepless night agonising. I sighed several times and rolled around in bed. The more I tried not to think about it, the more I was tormented by my idle thoughts. While doing so, the sky finally started to turn white, so I gave up trying to sleep in the end. I opened the curtains in the room to bathe in the morning sunlight, washed my face, changed my clothes and did my hair. I could have put on makeup by myself if I wanted to, but I didn¡¯t since there was no need to go through the trouble of dressing up beautifully. ¡°Diana¡­ Marion¡­¡± ¨D¨D¨D How did this happen? I stared at the pale face in the mirror and muttered. Who took them? Why did they take them? Do they have a grudge against Orpheus or are they holding the two for ransom? Claude said that he would let me know if there had been any progress, but he didn¡¯t bring me any information last night in the end. There probably hadn¡¯t been any progress and the kidnappers probably hadn¡¯t contacted. ¨D¨D¨D I hope they¡¯re both okay. I hope Diana and Marion are safe and sound. All I can do is pray that for now. I hope they both come back without incident and in good health. ¡°It¡¯s alright. It¡¯s going to be alright.¡± ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m sure they¡¯re both alright. Of course, they¡¯re both alright. Anyway, I¡¯ll just do what I can do for now. After breakfast, I¡¯ll go to Claude and tell him about my decision to go back to the Rosenstein mansion and start over with Orpheus. I¡¯ll also thank him for letting me stay in his house. After I tell him all this, I¡¯ll get on the carriage and go to support Orpheus who is probably busy with Diana¡¯s kidnapping. I¡¯ll be there for him and help him. ¡°Calm down, I have to be level-headed.¡± I¡¯ve made up my mind. I¡¯ll be an impeccable Countess Rosenstein this time, I¡¯ll clear my name and make Orpheus happy. I won¡¯t be trapped by that man¡¯s words anymore. I won¡¯t hesitate. That¡¯s the last time I¡¯m going to come to a halt because of my self-loathing. I glared at myself in the mirror and slapped my cheeks. ¡°Okay.¡± My pale face, which clearly showed that I was sleep deprived, was somewhat unreliable, but I felt assured that it would be fine when I saw my blue eyes shine brightly. When Claire came to wake me up, she was surprised to see that I was already ready. ¡°Wh-what¡¯s wrong!?¡± ¡°I woke up early and had time, so I got ready by myself. But I can¡¯t do my hair as good as you¡­¡± Before I got married into the Rosenstein House, I had to take care of myself. I can tighten my corset by myself, and even though I can¡¯t set my hair in a fancy way like Claire could, I can tie it up simply. ¡°No, it looks good. You tied it up neatly.¡± ¡°Thanks. From now on, I want to start doing things I can do on my own one step at a time. At least I want to get up on my own and change my own clothes. That¡¯s how I¡¯m going to change my mindset.¡± ¡°Madam¡­¡± ¡°Of course, I¡¯ll ask the servants to do the cleaning and laundry like before. I¡¯ll also ask help with changing into a dress for an evening party and for tying up my hair intricately.¡± ¡°Yes! Leave it to me! ¡­ Oh, I¡¯m sorry. This isn¡¯t the time to be laughing with everything that¡¯s happened.¡± ¡°No, it¡¯s fine. Laugh since times are like this. That way, we can hold out for longer.¡± After eating the simple breakfast that Claire had prepared for me, I instructed her to put our luggage onto the carriage and headed for the main wing. Claude is a busy man. I have to keep my message brief. As I walked, I imagined the best way to explain this to him. ¡°Umm, Madam¡­¡± I was stopped when I left the entrance hall in the separate wing. I turned back while wondering who it was and saw the young familiar apprentice gardener standing a short distance away. He was staring at me with an anxious look on his face. ¡°Morning, Nick. Did you need me for something?¡± ¡°Good morning,¡± he quickly greeted me back. Then, he looked around and took out a small piece of folded paper from his pocket. ¡°Hmm, I was told to give this to you¡­¡± ¡°To me?¡± Nick nodded. He walked over to me and gave me the paper. I received it and asked, ¡°Who is it from?¡± ¡°From a farmer who visits this mansion.¡± ¡°A farmer wanted you to give this to me?¡± What is this about¨D¨D¨D? The farmer must be a neighbouring farmer who delivers vegetables, eggs and other foods to this mansion. But I don¡¯t know any farmers. Didn¡¯t he give this to the wrong person? ¡°Is that true? Did that person give you my name?¡± ¡°Yes. He said he wanted me to give it to Lord Rosenstein¡¯s wife.¡± This is strange. In the first place, how did a mere farmer know that I was staying here? Don¡¯t tell me¨D¨D¨D. I ordered the boy to stay, opened the letter, then froze. ¡°¡­ How long has that farmer been coming to this mansion?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know. But he¡¯s been doing it longer than I¡¯ve been here.¡± ¡°How long have you been working here?¡± ¡°It¡¯s been two years.¡± Perhaps, someone had asked the farmer to pass this paper to me. Maybe in exchange for money. Along with a rough map, this was written on the paper ¡®If you want Lord Rosenstein¡¯s cousin and maid to return alive then come to this place alone.¡¯ Underneath it, this was written ¡®Don¡¯t tell anyone about this. If you tell anyone or bring people with you, then I¡¯ll end their lives.¡¯ ¡°So, it¡¯s like that?¡± The paper crunched in my hands as it shook. Diana is the lure. They kidnapped Diana to lure me there. Their real target was me. ¡°But why¡­?¡± Why are they after me? If they had done this because of a grudge or for ransom, then it¡¯s more effective to hold Diana hostage since she¡¯s rumoured to be Orpheus¡¯s lover instead of me, who is amusingly rumoured to be on bad terms with Orpheus. I hate to put it this way¡­ but I wouldn¡¯t go through the trouble of using Diana as bait to lure me out. Perhaps, the kidnappers might not have a grudge against Orpheus or want ransom from him, but they have some kind of grudge against me. Even though I played the bad wife, I don¡¯t remember doing anything to anyone that would cause them to take action to this extent, but I can¡¯t read people¡¯s minds. It¡¯s possible that someone may have been holding a terrible grudge against me without me realising it. ¨D¨D¨D In any case, what should I do? I know I shouldn¡¯t go. It¡¯s sheer stupidity to jump right into the fire myself. However, Diana and Marion won¡¯t be safe if I don¡¯t go. The kidnappers have already killed the coachman. They wrote that if I didn¡¯t follow their instructions, then they will harm them both. In the worst case, they¡¯ll probably kill the two. The same thing will happen if I talked to someone about this. I¡¯m sure they¡¯re watching my every move since they went to the trouble of writing that down. ¨D¨D¨D What the heck should I do. I was troubled. Whether Diana or Marion are saved depends on the decision I make at this very moment. ¡°Diana¡­¡± I think of Diana¡¯s smile which was like a sunflower. Her swaying platinum hair and amber eyes. ¡ºWe can still be friends, right?¡» ¡°¡­ Orpheus, I¡¯m sorry.¡± I can¡¯t abandon Diana and Marion. If I were asked to choose between their lives or my own, then I would choose the former. ¡°¡­ Nick, where¡¯s the servant¡¯s doorway? And I¡¯ll like to borrow something with a blade.¡± I thought I should prepare for the worst. I considered that the kidnappers could break their promise and try to harm Diana and Marion. ¡°It could be pruning shears or a small knife. If you have something with a blade, then please lend it to me.¡± The place the kidnappers designated was a forest which was located a short distance away from Claude¡¯s mansion. The other day, Susanna, Claire and I went to this forest for a picnic. I had memorised the route, so I didn¡¯t have to check the map on the way there. I walked silently along the straight path through the fields while soaking up the sunlight. The farmers were staring dumbfoundedly at the woman who was in a gorgeous dress and walking through the fields without a servant, parasol or hat, but I didn¡¯t care. It wasn¡¯t written in the letter that I shouldn¡¯t come in conspicuous clothes nor did it state that I shouldn¡¯t let anyone see me. So, it¡¯s not a problem. It is an act of God that many people saw me, and it¡¯s not my fault. With my unfamiliar shoes and feet that weren¡¯t used to walking, I finally reached the thick and silent forest. I stopped at the entrance and a cool and pleasant breeze blew at me through the trees. ¡°Are you Ophelia?¡± A low voice rang from the forest as I wondered if I should go a little further in since there was no one in the area. My heart skipped a beat, and my tension grew. ¡°¡­ That¡¯s right,¡± I replied, and a man appeared from behind a large tree. He was a well-built man with unusually sharp eyes. He wore a plain, inconspicuous outfit, but had a sword on his waist. The man started at me, then jerked his chin, but I squinted my eyes in defiance, since I had no intention of following him. ¡°I won¡¯t go into the forest. I¡¯ll wait for you here instead of running away, so bring the two hostages here.¡± ¡°What did you say? You¡¯re in no position to make demands ¨D¨D¨D.¡± I took out the dagger that I had hidden in my sleeves, pulled it out of its leather sheath and thrusted it at my throat. Then I smiled calmly at the man who had widened his eyes and gulped, ¡°Oi¡­¡± ¡°You¡¯ll be in a pinch if I die, right?¡± The man came back to his senses, and glared at me threateningly, ¡°Do you have the courage to do that? It¡¯s not like you¡¯ll die straight away even if you slice your throat, especially with that knife. The blood would clot, and you would suffer. It¡¯s really painful.¡± ¡°My, how frightening.¡± I felt a cut on my skin when I put more force into the hand that was gripping the dagger, creating a burning sensation. Something warm dripped down my chest and wet my lace collar. ¡°Even so, I¡¯m serious. Bring the two here and let them go, then I¡¯ll let you take me. Your goal is to kidnap me, right?¡± The man broke our glaring contest, and the man gave in. He shook his head in disbelief, said, ¡°Don¡¯t run away,¡± before disappearing into the depths of the forest. ¨D¨D¨D Phew. I let out a sigh in relief. I wondered what I would do if the man didn¡¯t give into my demand but using my life as a threat seemed to have worked. Therefore, this may let Diana and Marion get away safely¡­ I thought as I put my hand on my chest and frowned when I saw blood soak my fingers. ¡°¡­ Honestly, what the heck are you doing?¡± That was reckless. I had acted outrageously reckless. It wasn¡¯t that long ago when Juris lectured me for being reckless, but I haven¡¯t learned my lesson at all. I was scared. My legs still shaking was evidence of this. My stomach got upset when I imagined what would happen from here on out. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Orpheus.¡± I was going to start over with you and be happy this time. But then this happened. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m really sorry. I heard the sound of rustling leaves and from the depths of the forest, four men appeared with the man from earlier. They all had swords on their waists, and two of them were carrying women who looked like Diana and Marion on their shoulders. ¡°You¡¯re a brave young lady,¡± a tall, bald man said with a grin. When I didn¡¯t answer, they lowered the women on the ground, and forced the women to face me. Indeed, it was Diana and Marion. They both looked exhausted, had cloths wrapped around their mouths and their hands and feet were tied so they couldn¡¯t escape. Diana must have resisted when they were caught because her hair was flowing freely down her back, and Marion had a blue bruise on her cheek which looked like she had been hit. Marion was shocked when our eyes met. She¡¯s probably wondering why I¡¯m here. Diana couldn¡¯t see so she was unaware of my presence. She stood there with her arms crossed, and she looked worried. ¡°You don¡¯t look like a wicked woman like everyone says you are. You¡¯re just like a saint, rescuing your husband¡¯s cousin regardless of danger.¡± ¡°¡­ Please remove the cloth from their mouths and untie the rope around their hands and feet,¡± I ignored his teasing words and demanded. The bald man shrugged his shoulders and looked back at his companions. The men took that as their cue. They untied Diana and Marion and pushed their backs. ¡°Ophelia-sama!¡± Marion shouted. ¡°Diana-sama, it¡¯s Ophelia-sama! Ophelia-sama has come to save us¡­!¡± ¡°What did you say?!¡± Diana also shouted. She looked as if she didn¡¯t believe Marion. ¡°No way, why¡­ Why is Ophelia¡­?!¡± I held the knife at my throat and spoke to Marion, ¡°Take Diana and run.¡± ¡°But¡­!¡± ¡°Quickly! It would be pointless for me to come if you guys don¡¯t run away!¡± Although the hostages were trying to escape, the kidnappers weren¡¯t moving. They looked at our exchange in amusement. They probably were going to let Diana and Marion go once they caught me even if I didn¡¯t threaten them. ¨D¨D¨D But I can¡¯t let my guard down. Diana was almost in a frenzy, but Marion was relatively calm. She probably concluded that it was better to go call for help than stay here. She pulled on hesitant Diana¡¯s arm and started running. ¡°I¡¯ll get help as soon as I can,¡± Marion whispered as she passed me. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯m afraid you probably won¡¯t make it back in time. ¡°No! Let me go, Marion! I can¡¯t leave Ophelia here! Please, let me go!¡± Diana¡¯s shouts faded in the distance, and then I couldn¡¯t hear her anymore. ¨D¨D¨D It¡¯s about time. I only took the dagger away from my throat when enough time had passed. I tossed the blood stained dagger on the ground, stared at the kidnappers¡¯ faces and prepared myself. ¡°¡­ So? Where are you taking me?¡± The bald man cackled and said the same thing he had said earlier, ¡°You¡¯re brave.¡± ¡°Are you really a noblewoman? You¡¯re a little too gusty and it¡¯s a little creepy. Well, it¡¯s better than seeing you bawl though¡­¡± ¡°You don¡¯t need to say unnecessary things. Just tell me where you¡¯re taking me.¡± ¡°To the client¡¯s house.¡± The man snorted and walked closer to me. ¡°The client¡¯s house? Were you all hired?¡± The bald man didn¡¯t answer. He stopped in front of me and looked down on me coldly, then he pulled my right arm vigorously. ¡°Sorry.¡± Immediately afterwards, I felt a strong impact on my stomach. I didn¡¯t even have time to cough at the impact that was gradually rising up my body before my vision darkened, then I lost consciousness not long after. Chapter 37 - Victoria Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles I woke up to the uncomfortable feeling of rattling and shaking. How long was I unconscious for¨D¨D¨D? I opened my eyes, but it was pitch black and I couldn¡¯t see anything. It was horribly hot and suffocating, and to make matters worse, I couldn¡¯t move my body. My entire body seemed to be wrapped in a large cloth, and my hands and feet were also tightly bound. I felt a sharp pain from the rope when I tried to move. This led to a tingling pain in my stomach from being hit earlier. ¡°This is the worst,¡± I tried to mutter, but the cloth wrapped around my mouth made my voice muffled and indistinct. They went this far to restrain a powerless woman? I was stunned. I let them catch me without resisting, but they still had to cover my mouth, tie up my hands and feet and wrap me in a cloth, this is just too horrible. If they¡¯re not going to kill me straight away, then can¡¯t they treat me with a little more respect? My right arm, which was pinned to the ground, grew numb, so I tried to twist my body in a different direction. Then, ¡°Don¡¯t struggle,¡± an irrational voice came from above me. ¡°We¡¯re almost there. We¡¯ll let you out when we get there, so behave yourself.¡± Which means we¡¯re heading towards the client¡¯s house. I was probably on a carriage or cart. The continuous vibrations are probably from the wheels. It¡¯s no use now that things have ended up like this. I can¡¯t resist in this situation, and it was better to stay still than lose strength trying to struggle. I relaxed and closed my eyes. I thought about Orpheus, the beautiful person who smiled sweetly and bewitchingly. Then the vibrations stopped after a long, long time had passed. ¡°We¡¯re here, lady.¡± I heard other noises along with the man¡¯s voice and my body was lifted up in an uncomfortable way. After the disgusting floating sensation hit me, something solid slammed against my chest and stomach causing me to moan in pain and shock. I knew that someone was carrying me over their shoulders, but I didn¡¯t know where I was being taken. I was shaken, and my anxiety grew every time my face was hit. ¨D¨D¨D I wish they would let me out of these cloth ties at least. The shaking finally stopped when I began to complain about how he said he would let me out when we got here but didn¡¯t. The person who was carrying me seemed to have stopped. ¡°You brought her here?¡± Out of nowhere, a familiar voice sounded. Rather than feeling nostalgic, I didn¡¯t want to hear it again, it was unpleasant ¨D¨D¨D. ¡°Let her out.¡± I floated in the air again, and the moment my vision cleared, I was dropped to the ground. I wasn¡¯t dropped from a high height, but I hit my head, cheek and shoulders hard because my hands were tired. ¡°Argh¡­¡± I writhed in pain while moving my gaze to look up at the owner of the unpleasant voice. His chubby body, expensive clothes, jewellery and stagnant eyes. His blonde hair hadn¡¯t changed since he was young. He was grinning grossly. ¨D¨D¨D Why? The man who I shouldn¡¯t have had to see again ¨D¨D¨D my father, whom I had already severed ties with. ¡ºWhere are you taking me?¡» ¡ºTo the client¡¯s house.¡» I remembered the conversation I had with the bald man and it sent a chill down my spine. ¨D¨D¨D Was this man the ringleader? But why? For what? Don¡¯t tell me he¡¯s going to demand a ransom from Orpheus in exchange for me? I can tell that his business investment isn¡¯t going well. This man has been investing in various businesses for a long time and failing, and every time he fails, he takes it out on me. I wonder if he was trying to get more money because he ran out of the additional funds he had gotten from Orpheus ¨D¨D¨D. If so, what a stupid thing to do. I thought in annoyance when I saw that his eyes were filled with a bizarre light even though they looked dark and stagnated. ¨D¨D¨D Did he lose his reason because of greed? It would have been fine if he had only taken me, his daughter, but the coachman was murdered, and he also had Diana and Marion kidnapped. Those are criminal acts that are unforgivable ¨D¨D¨D and not tolerated by society. Furthermore, I have already severed my familial ties with this man. Orpheus may have paid this man to help me, but from now on, he will probably hunt him down mercilessly, convict him and throw him in prison. I don¡¯t even have to think to know this, but he may have lost his ability to think normally either because of desperation or because he was taken in by someone¡¯s get-rich scheme. ¨D¨D¨D Or did he want to hurt me? It was far dumber to do that than kidnap me for ransom, but this man would do it. This, too, would be because his investments weren¡¯t successful. ¡ºI won¡¯t let you be happy. I¡¯ll make you suffer more than I have.¡» He even declared this before. If he¡¯s in a situation where he¡¯s up to his neck in debt and he had to flee the country or commit suicide, then he would probably want to drag me with him instead of doing it alone. After he takes it out on me that is. I know this because he¡¯s oppressed me for so many years. That¡¯s the type of person he is. He hates me because I resemble my mother and is attached to me in a perverse way. I have kept my distance and was going to start over a new leaf, but it seems like it¡¯s not easy to cut ties with him. ¨D¨D¨D I was vaguely aware of this, but I didn¡¯t expect him to go this far. I turned my back on the familiar mansion and stared at the man who was arrogantly looking down on me. Normally, he would get angry and say, ¡°What¡¯s with those eyes?¡± but today, he kept on smirking. ¡°It¡¯s been a while, Louise. I haven¡¯t seen you in a really long time.¡± I didn¡¯t mishear, this man certainly said that. He didn¡¯t call me by my name, but my mother¡¯s. ¡°It looks like you¡¯ve run away from that guy again. No, should I say that you were abandoned?¡± He¡¯s always been crazy, but has he finally lost it? I shivered. Was he so mad that he couldn¡¯t distinguish between reality and delusion? The man slowly approached me, crouched down, peered at my face, then smiled wider. ¡°It¡¯s because you became pregnant even though you¡¯re a prostitute.¡± His breath smelled like alcohol, and I knew that he hadn¡¯t gone mad, he was just simply drunk. ¨D¨D¨D No, he might have gone mad. His mind might be so broken that he couldn¡¯t distinguish between right and wrong, and so had to drink starting from sunrise. ¡°Hahaha! It¡¯s fun to see you suffer. It¡¯s great. I never thought that you would make that face as I look down on you.¡± He grabbed my hair and pulled it. A twitching pain ran through my head. ¡°Kneel down and beg for forgiveness. If you do, then I¡¯ll forgive you for the countless times you¡¯ve been rude and support you. I¡¯ll take care of you. And that baby in your stomach.¡± If that¡¯s all it takes for him to release me, then I¡¯ll apologise. I¡¯ll even get down on my knees. However, the man only grinned and wouldn¡¯t even take off the cloth that was wrapped around my mouth, let alone the rope around my hands and feet. I couldn¡¯t even apologise even if I wanted to. I moaned in anguish and the man¡¯s expression suddenly changed, and fury flashed across his flushed face. ¨D¨D¨D Shit. ¡°Don¡¯t look down on me!¡± I was thrown onto the hard ground when he hit my cheek strongly. The impact was so strong that my eyes went completely white, and I thought the bones in my face had shattered. In addition, I seemed to have hit my head when I was thrown to the ground. My vision blurred and I felt dizzy. ¡°Whatever. Lock her in the dungeon.¡± With those words as the cue, I was picked up again and carried over a man¡¯s shoulder. I only managed to stay conscious halfway and passed out again while being shaken violently. When I opened my eyes, it was pitch black and I couldn¡¯t see anything. I got sick of this happening again. The cloth that was in my mouth had been removed, but my hands and feet were still tied, so I couldn¡¯t move. I¡¯m probably in the dungeon. I can tell by the feel of the cold floor that deprived me of my body heat and the musty smell. I had been thrown in here many times when I was working as a servant. For trivial reasons such as making a small mistake or because that man was in a bad mood. ¡°I never thought that I would be back here like this¡­¡± The voice I hadn¡¯t heard in a while was terribly cracked and echoed well in this room which had no other noise. I was exhausted and my body limped. It¡¯s dark, I¡¯m tired, and it hurts everywhere. I¡¯m thirsty and don¡¯t have the energy to get up. I still don¡¯t know why they went to such lengths to kidnap me, but it doesn¡¯t look like I have to worry about being killed right now. It should be fine to lie down like this. ¨D¨D¨D Come to think of it, I wonder if Diana and Marion got away safely. There was plenty of time for them to get far away. I¡¯m sure the kidnappers wouldn¡¯t go to the trouble of chasing after them since they had let them go. I¡¯m sure they got away safely and were found. However, both Claude¡¯s mansion and the Rosenstein mansion must be in such a big uproar. Diana and Marion had returned safely, but I was kidnapped and disappeared instead. And I don¡¯t think there will be a single person who would think that I had been kidnapped by my biological father. No one would think that someone would kidnap me to the Lagerfeld House since it was half a day¡¯s journey from that forest. ¡°¡­ I wonder what will happen to me.¡± Will I be released in exchange for a ransom, or will I be locked up and beaten depending on the mood of that man? Or ¨D¨D¨D in the worst case scenario ¨D¨D¨D will he make me commit double suicide with him? In any case, the more I think about it, the more depressed I become. I rolled over, gently closed my eyes and imagined a happy future with Orpheus. It was better to hold onto hope than to wallow in despair to keep my heart strong. I haven¡¯t given up completely yet. I don¡¯t intend to obey him at all. ¡°I¡¯ll run away when I see the opportunity. Definitely.¡± I¡¯ll start over with Orpheus and make him happy this time. I won¡¯t cower with just this much. I¡¯ll resist until the very end. I made up my mind and stared into the darkness. Some time after, I heard footsteps in the distance. The heavy footsteps seemed to be coming this way, and the sound got louder little by little. It wasn¡¯t the footsteps of several people, but of one person. Thinking that an opportunity to escape might have presented itself, I put all my strength into my limp hands and sluggishly raised my upper body. Before long, a light appeared in the darkness. The hazy orange flames dimly, yet charmingly, lit up the person¡¯s face. Blue eyes, white skin, rose coloured lips, and chestnut curly hair ¨D¨D¨D it was a cute appearance of a life size doll. ¡°You are¡­ Victoria¡­.?¡± There stood my half-sister, Victoria Maria Lagerfeld. She was a year younger than me. She wore a light red dress with lots of ribbon and lace, which looked out of place in a savage dungeon, with a candlestick in one hand. ¡°Why¡­ are you here¡­ sister?¡± Victoria said with a stunned and disbelieving look on her face. I couldn¡¯t tell if she was a friend or foe, so I kept my mouth shut and held my breath. Victoria and I are half-sisters, but we were treated completely differently in this house. I was shunned and treated as a servant, but Victoria was doted upon and cherished like a locked up princess. I had to call her ¡®-sama¡¯ and I was forbidden from talking to her, let along get involved with her. As a result, we sisters have never had a decent conversation. To begin with, it seemed like she didn¡¯t care about me at all and didn¡¯t even make eye contact with me when we passed each other. Therefore, I can¡¯t read her. Is she an enemy or an ally? ¨D¨D¨D What did she come here for? She acts boldly at times. She was probably interested in who her father had kidnapped and couldn¡¯t suppress her curiosity, so she came here to see who it was. From the surprised look on her face, she probably didn¡¯t think that I was here¨D¨D¨D. ¡°I can¡¯t believe this! That stupid, idiotic man!¡± Her voice was so loud that I was worried that someone might have heard her from upstairs. My shoulders jolted in surprise and I widened my eyes. ¡°Id-idotic man?¡± ¡°That useless drunk old man! Despicable! What the hell did he do?! He can¡¯t just kidnap his own daughter and put her under house arrest! Unbelievable! Despicable!¡± ¡°Useless¡­ drunk old man¡­¡± ¨D¨D¨D Where did she learn those words? I know I shouldn¡¯t worry about that right now, but I¡¯m stunned by the verbal abuse that was spewing from her flowery lips. This girl was bold at times, but didn¡¯t she usually act more lady-like and graceful? ¡°That man, his investment failed again. He¡¯s been crazy ever since and always drunk. In addition, his delusions got worse, and he screams nonsense everyday. He beats the servants and screams your mother¡¯s name¡­ Immediately after, he hired those strange men¡­¡± Victoria said with harsh breathing and her cute face scrunched up with shame. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, sister. I never thought he would do this. I put up with his actions because he¡¯s my father, but I can¡¯t anymore. I¡¯ve had enough. I hope this house is destroyed.¡± ¡°Wait, Victoria. What¨D¨D¨D¡­¡± ¡°I meant what I said. I hate that man so much that I can¡¯t stand him. I hate this house too.¡± ¡°You¡­ Aren¡¯t you loved by that man?¡± Victoria, unlike me, is doted on by that man. Even from a distance, they look like they¡¯re close. So why is she criticising him so much? Why is she speaking ill of him? ¡°Love?¡± Victoria snared mockingly. ¡°I¡¯ve never been given that. The only people who loved me were my mother and my nanny. That man only gave me a place to live, fed me, brought me dresses and a few luxuries, that¡¯s all and nothing else.¡± ¡°But he was nice to you, wasn¡¯t he?¡± ¡°Yes, he was. Just to let you see, that is.¡± ¡°No way.¡± It can¡¯t be, I thought but Victoria¡¯s smile was awfully cold. ¡°I¡¯ve been vaguely aware of it for some time, but as soon as you got married and left this mansion, his attitude suddenly changed. He ignored me. He did buy me things, but it¡¯s barely anything. I don¡¯t even see his face when I pass him.¡± ¡°I knew he would act like that,¡± Victoria shrugged. ¡°That man, you know, he doesn¡¯t love me. The kindness he showed me was to spite you, no, your mother. This was his revenge against Louise-sama for abandoning him. You, my mother, and I were only pawns for his revenge. Even though Louise-sama isn¡¯t here anymore.¡± ¡°That man isn¡¯t a father,¡± Victoria spat out. Her blue eyes were stained with sadness and it was painful to look at them. ¡°Pawns¡­ for revenge¡­¡± ¨D¨D¨D Oh, she¡¯s the same as me? I don¡¯t know much about their relationship. I was always an outsider. But I¡¯m sure Victoria is just as troubled by her relationship with her father as I was. She was conflicted since she knew that she wasn¡¯t loved and was only a tool for revenge. She couldn¡¯t leave the mansion like I had since she was the heir, so she continued to endure it alone. This whole time in this dark mansion. ¡°The truth is,¡± Victoria muttered. She sat down on the cold floor and put the candlestick down. ¡°It¡¯s too late to say this, but I wanted to get along with you, sister. I¡¯ve always wanted to get along with you. But you¡¯ll get punished if I talk to you. You¡¯ll also get punished if I try to protect you. That man hit you and threw you out into the cold. So, I could only act as I had. I could only ignore you to avoid provoking that man,¡± she said and hung her head. Her glossy, curly hair fell from her shoulders and flowed to her chest. ¡°I¡¯m sorry. I¡¯m sure I gave you unpleasant memories. I¡¯m really sorry.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t apologise.¡± I thought she hated me. I thought she had ignored me because she hated me and looked down on me. But that wasn¡¯t true. My heart hurt. The back of my eyes heated up. ¨D¨D¨D Why didn¡¯t I notice this sooner? We could have supported each other as sisters. We could have stood against him together. ¡°You protected me in your own way, didn¡¯t you? I won¡¯t hold a grudge against you and that man is to blame in the first place, so don¡¯t blame yourself.¡± ¡°Sister¡­¡± ¡°I¡¯m glad to hear how you feel. I want to get along with you from now on. ¨D¨D¨D No, let¡¯s get along from now on. Since we¡¯re blood related.¡± I will shake free from that man and face forward. I hope that Victoria can do the same. Therefore, I want to help her. I want to protect her as her sister. ¡°Thanks,¡± Victoria said. Her face, lit by candlelight, scrunched as if she was about to burst into tears. ¡°I didn¡¯t think that we would make up like this. But I¡¯m glad. ¨D¨D¨D Oh no. This isn¡¯t the time to talk.¡± Victoria stood up. She took a deep breath and tightened her cute face. ¡°I want to let you out right now, but I don¡¯t know where the key is. That man probably has it. It¡¯s hard to run away since those guys are gathered in the garden¡­ I¡¯ll do everything I can to contact Earl Rosenstein.¡± ¡°Hold on for a little while longer,¡± Victoria said apologetically and shook her head. ¡°Thanks, Victoria. You¡¯re saving my life. Thank you so much.¡± ¡°You¡¯re exaggerating. I¡¯m only doing what I should do. Ah, and I¡¯ll get you something to eat and drink.¡± ¡°Thank you very much, but don¡¯t overdo it.¡± That man is out of his mind. If he knew that Victoria was trying to help me escape, then he¡¯ll hit her as well. ¡°It¡¯s alright. That man is drinking in his room and the people he¡¯s hired won¡¯t come inside the mansion unless he calls them.¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine even if I move around freely,¡± Victoria laughed. ¡°If the old housekeeper finds me, then I¡¯ll just get a good scolding.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry, I¡¯ll leave now. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, yes, sister.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°If Father is arrested and this house is destroyed, can I rely on you?¡± I laughed and replied, ¡°Of course.¡± ¡°Come to the Rosenstein mansion. I¡¯m sure Orpheus will forgive you too.¡± ¡°Yay!¡± Victoria clenched her vacant hand and jumped up and down in joy. ¡°We¡¯re going to get along this time! I¡¯m so excited!¡± After laughing for a while, she said, ¡°I¡¯ll be back,¡± and left. I watched her walk off with a smile and muttered, ¡°Thanks, Victoria.¡± ¨D¨D¨D I see hope thanks to you. Even as the light faded and the darkness returned, and even as her light footsteps grew further away, the lingering sound of her bright laughter remained. Chapter 38 - Danger After Victoria left, I crawled on the floor like a caterpillar and approached the wall that I had found with my fingers. I leaned my back and head against the cold, hard wall and let out a long sigh. I stared at the crushing darkness. It was strange. I was in this situation, but rather than feeling uneasy, my chest tingled with happiness and my body slightly warmed up. Victoria didn¡¯t hate me. I thought that no one would love me or like me except for my late mother. I wasn¡¯t needed by anyone, and at the worst times, I grieved that I had even been born. Stupid, dumb, useless and a simpleton. I was torn apart by the countless abuse that I had been subjected to and the hatred that my father had directed at me, and I was trapped into thinking that people hated me because I was defective and had nothing to offer. I was intoxicated by the sadness and the little bit of pleasure it brought me. However, that was a big mistake. People didn¡¯t hate me as much as I thought they did. I may be hated more than the average person, but there are certainly people who like me. There are even people who tell me they love me. I was just under false assumptions after all. I saw everyone as my enemy and assumed that they ¡®hated¡¯ me without confirming what they really thought about me. I even twisted their most genuine kindness and received their actions negatively. It was easier to just assume that they didn¡¯t like me from the start and give up ¨D¨D¨D. I kept my distance from them, put up a wall and didn¡¯t try to meet them halfway. I didn¡¯t try to understand their feelings. I was always complacent. I was selfish. And because of that, I hurt Orpheus and the people I love. ¡°I have to change.¡± I can¡¯t stay the way I am. I have to let go of my false assumptions, stop overly putting myself down and face the people I love and those who I will meet head on. If I don¡¯t do that then I¡¯m sure I¡¯ll make the same mistakes again. I¡¯ll hurt Orpheus and others. I¡¯ll be wringing my own neck. ¡°There¡¯s no point in starting over if I keep doing the same things over and over again.¡± So, I¡¯ll change ¨D¨D¨D. I will take this opportunity to truly break off my relationship with him. I will no longer be trapped by his hatred or words. I will no longer be dragged down by the past. I will leave the old me behind and be reborn as the new me. For Orpheus¡¯s sake as well¨D¨D¨D. My heart trembled as I made this decision. I felt a surge of strength in my stomach and a burning in my chest. ¡°I will change. I will definitely change.¡± I thought about the people I cared about. I want to see the people who care about me and are important to me. Orpheus, Claire, Claude, Diana, and Juris. I want to see them and talk to them. That¡¯s why I have to get out of here. I won¡¯t be defeated by that man¡¯s malice. ¡°Like hell I will.¡± I won¡¯t give into such cowardly methods ¨D¨D¨D. When the roar reached my ears, it seemed like there was nothing to be afraid of anymore ¨D¨D¨D not even the darkness that didn¡¯t have a ray of light in it, nor that crazy man. I don¡¯t know how much time passed since then. I heard the sounds of footsteps again as I desperately tried to figure out how to escape from this mansion. Is it Victoria¨D¨D¨D? I separated myself from the wall, thinking that she might have brought me food like she had promised to. I haven¡¯t eaten anything in over half a day. I wasn¡¯t hungry, but my throat was parched, and I couldn¡¯t wait to drink some cold water. I was about to call Victoria¡¯s name when a candle lit up the darkness, and I quickly shut my mouth when I realised that it wasn¡¯t her behind the bars. ¡°Hey Miss. Are you alive?¡± It was the bald man who had kidnapped me. Only him, and no one else. ¡°Your father told me to bring you to him.¡± The bald man skilfully unlocked the door with one hand, then he opened the barred door and walked over to me. ¡°¡­ I see. It¡¯ll be heavy for you to carry me, so I¡¯ll walk by myself. Please untie the rope.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t do that. It¡¯ll be troublesome if you run away.¡± ¡°You¡¯ll catch me straight away even if I run away. A woman¡¯s legs aren¡¯t that fast.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t. You never know what will happen.¡± I looked at the man who was laughing boldly and sighed since it wasn¡¯t going to be easy to escape. I¡¯m familiar with the structure of this house. I thought that I could somehow get past him and get away, but it seemed that he didn¡¯t want to take any chances. He carried me easily and took me out of my cell. ¡°Can¡¯t you treat me with a little more respect? I¡¯m not an object. My face has been hitting your back for a while now and it hurts.¡± I protested angrily when we were climbing the stairs since my nose hurt from hitting his back and the bald man laughed in amusement before saying, ¡°You¡¯re real gutsy. You¡¯re not the least bit afraid even in this situation.¡± I wanted to tell him, ¡°Of course I¡¯m not.¡± Being afraid won¡¯t make the situation better. The more I lose my cool, the worse things will get. ¡°More importantly, treat me more respectfully. I¡¯ll throw up if you shake me around too much,¡± I threatened him, and the bald man finally stopped down his pace and stopped being rough with me. We left the cold basement, went to the first floor corridor, and proceeded up the stairs to the second floor. All the windows were covered by thick curtains and the lights were on. Apparently, it was already evening. I couldn¡¯t see any servants. The bald man walked straight down the second floor corridor and stopped in front of a room. ¡°We¡¯re here, Miss.¡± ¡°This is¡­¡± The door opened with a creaking sound. On the other side was that man ¨D¨D¨D my father. He was slumped on the couch; his hair and clothes were a mess. There was a short table in front of him and several liquor bottles lying at his feet. ¡°Oh, Louise, you¡¯re finally here. I got tired of waiting for you. ¨D¨D¨D Hey, sit her down on that chair over there.¡± My hands and feet remained tied as I was thrown into the chair across from the man. ¡°Hmm. What a mess,¡± my father said when the bald man left the room while looking at me as if he was running his tongue over me. He must have drunk quite a lot since I could smell the alcohol on his breath even though he was far away. I looked down since I was sickened by his rude gaze and the smell of alcohol. ¡°Look at me, Louise.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not Louise, I¡¯m Ophelia.¡± ¡°Ophelia? Oh, that.¡± Father nodded as if he understood something. ¡°You mean your daughter. I gave her to that man¡¯s son since he paid a lot for her. There were other buyers, but that man¡¯s son paid the most. Aren¡¯t you glad that your daughter and the son of the man you love are together? They¡¯re half-siblings, but that doesn¡¯t matter and you¡¯re happy right? Well, I heard that man¡¯s son loves his handicap cousin, so that girl is probably living a lonely life in the corner of that mansion right now.¡± I raised my face and stared at my father, who was chuckling. I wonder who the man my mother loved was. Who are half-siblings? Is he so drunk that he can¡¯t tell the difference between fantasy and reality? ¡°It¡¯s all because of your bad behaviour. It¡¯s your fault that she was forced to marry her blood brother and that she¡¯s unhappy.¡± ¡°What are you talking about? My mother loved you. I¡¯m your daughter ¨D¨D¨D.¡± ¡°Shut up!¡± It was a miracle that I was able to avoid the flying liquor bottle. I saw the man grab the liquor bottle on the table and quickly ducked down. The liquor bottle flew through the air with such force that it shattered with a loud clang when it hit the floor. ¡°Your mother loved that man! Your mother, Loiuse, didn¡¯t disregard that man! I came to her every day and paid her a lot of money, but she always gave me a cold stare and looked down on me, and then she gave birth to that man¡¯s kid!¡± The man shouted like he was a child who was throwing a tantrum, then he limped onto the couch, probably from running out of breath from speaking so much. ¡°¡­ Aren¡¯t I your daughter¡­?¡± ¡°You? My daughter?¡± A loud laugh echoed through the heavy air in the room. ¡°Don¡¯t be ridiculous! I¡¯ve never slept with Louise! I paid her a lot of money and yet I¡¯ve never slept with her!¡± The man swung his thick arms and swept away all the liquor bottles on the table. The sounds of the shattering glass sounded like a scream. ¡°You¡¯re that man¡¯s, Ernst¡¯s, daughter. You can tell straight away from the colour of your eyes. They¡¯re blue, an even darker blue than Louise¡¯s. It¡¯s an annoying colour, just like Ernst¡¯s. They make me want to kill you.¡± I couldn¡¯t breathe, and it wasn¡¯t because he said it made him want to kill me. I couldn¡¯t breathe because the man in front of me just said something unbelievable as if it was nothing. Ernst ¨D¨D¨D. That was the name of Orpheus¡¯s adoptive father and my father-in-law. The former Earl Rosenstein, Ernst Rainer von Rosenstein. No way, this can¡¯t be true ¨D¨D¨D. ¡°Ernst-sama¡­ is my¡­ real father?¡± The voice I finally managed to squeeze out was trembling. ¡°Why are you asking that now? You know. She¡¯s your child.¡± Ah¨D¨D¨D. I¡¯m not this man¡¯s daughter? My real father, the man who my mother loved, was Ernst Rainer von Rosenstein. The man who was smiling gently in the portrait. I remembered what my mother had said to me before she passed away. ¡ºThat person, your father, he gave me so much love. The red roses are proof of his love. Of course, your mother also sincerely loved your father. I loved him more than anyone in the world.¡» The person who gave my mother red roses isn¡¯t this man, but Ernst-sama. Am I happy or sad ¨D¨D¨D or maybe what I¡¯m feeling is close to joy? A number of unexplainable emotions passed through my chest and my heart tightened. ¡°But it looks like she doesn¡¯t know. Ophelia believes that I¡¯m her father. She¡¯s an idiot. Don¡¯t you think so, Louise?¡± I thought that the man, who was drunk and kept mixing me up with my mother, was eerie. I¡¯m not Louise, I¡¯m Ophelia. However, I hesitated to point that out because of the eerie and disturbing look in his eyes. If I provoke him, then he might throw a tantrum and throw a liquor bottle at me again like he had done earlier. ¡°It¡¯s not working.¡± A chill ran down my spine as the man gave me an affection look with a gentle smile which was the opposite of what he had said. ¡°I tried so hard to forget you, so I sold off your daughter who looks just like you, so I don¡¯t have to remember you, but it¡¯s not working. You always torment me. You criticise me with your cold eyes.¡± The man held his head as he hung it down and repeated resentfully, ¡°It¡¯s not working.¡± ¡°I was going to get you this time. That¡¯s why I paid a lot of money to hire those guys and had you kidnapped¡­ I knew when I saw you again. I knew that you¡¯ll never be mine. You won¡¯t sympathise with me. Just like that time.¡± It¡¯s too late, I thought. I didn¡¯t need to provoke him. This man is losing his mind. I need to escape ¨D¨D¨D. My life will be in danger if I don¡¯t. This man is hopeless. He¡¯s completely insane. I don¡¯t know what he will do to me if I stay here. I thought, but my hands and feet were tied, and I was in no condition to escape. The more I struggled, the more the rope cut into me, blocking my movements. I could only gasp and freeze as the man stood up and staggered a little closer to me. ¡°If you¡¯re not going to be mine and if you¡¯re just going to torment me, then die. Die along with your daughter and let me go!¡± I could avoid a liquor bottle, but it was impossible to avoid the big fat man. He jumped at me and flipped the chair I was sitting on. ¡°Gah¡­!¡± I barely avoided him hitting my head, but the moment I tried to get up, he strangled me. My mind went completely blank. I tried to resist with my tied up hands and legs, but his hold on my neck didn¡¯t loosen at all. ¡°DIE!¡± My heart pounded. My ears were ringing. I couldn¡¯t breathe and couldn¡¯t stand the pain. Is this where I¡¯m going to die ¨D¨D¨D? A high-pitched shrill sounded just after my vision turned bright red. Something fluttered and the arms that were strangling me disappeared. His large body seemed to have collapsed and a pale girl with curly chestnut hair appeared. I coughed while feeling confused, and Victoria pushed the man on top of me with both hands as hard as she could. ¡°Are you alright?!¡± She pulled my arm to help me up and said, ¡°Hold on, I¡¯ll untie you now!¡± Then, she looked around the room and picked up the sharpest fragment she could find. She then began to rub it against the ropes binding my legs in an attempt to cut it. I¡¯m saved¨D¨D¨D? I finally understood what had happened. Victoria had struck the man on the head with a vase or something, causing him to faint. I knew that she acted daringly sometimes, but I never expected her to go this far. I could only marvel at her actions. ¡°Victoria, why are you here¡­?¡± ¡°I brought you some food, but you weren¡¯t there, so I knew he had taken you somewhere and looked around for you. Then, I heard voices coming from this room and when I peeked in, I saw that you were being strangled and I knew I had to help.¡± Thanks to Victoria¡¯s efforts, the ropes around my legs were cut and my restraints were released. The rope had been tied so tightly that they left red marks on my skin. ¡°Okay, now your arms. Wait, this is hard to cut, so I¡¯ll get something else to cut it with ¨D¨D¨D.¡± At that moment, the man who had fainted, slowly got up. ¡°Run away!¡± But the man was faster. Before I knew it, he had stood up and was swinging his arms around like a log. ¡°You bitch!¡± ¡°Kya?!¡± She screamed and her petite body was blown away. ¡°Victoria!¡± The floor was littered with pottery shards. She¡¯ll be covered in blood if she falls on top of that. My body moved on my own the moment I thought that. I caught Victoria and rolled onto the floor. Several shards wedged into my back, and it felt painful and hot, but I somehow managed to swallow my scream. It hurt like hell, but the pain wasn¡¯t unbearable. More importantly¡­ ¡°Move aside! Don¡¯t get in my way!¡± The man had completely lost his mind. He grabbed Victoria¡¯s curly hair as she laid there unconscious, dragged her with all his might and took out his anger on her by kicking her on the back. ¡°Stop!¡± Blood rushed to my head at his poor treatment towards her and I forgot myself and screamed. ¡°What are you doing?! Victoria is your daughter!¡± ¡°Shut up! I don¡¯t care about her!¡± I recalled her blue eyes stained with sadness. ¡ºYou, my mother, and I were only pawns for his revenge. ¡» She looked as if she was hurting and in pain. I looked like her in the past ¨D¨D¨D. ¡°¡­ I¡¯ll never forgive you.¡± This man isn¡¯t my father. Yet, he tricked me and brought me here. Then he tyrannised me. He hurt Victoria to get revenge. I won¡¯t forgive him ¨D¨D¨D. I quickly picked up a shard with my tied up hands and covered them with my fingers so that he wouldn¡¯t see it. The man jumped at me again and pushed me down. He strangled me again, but I never let go of the shard. I limped and my consciousness was fading away, but the moment the man let his guard down, I stabbed him with the shard. I felt a soft, squishy sensation and splashes of blood. A hair-rising scream resounded in the room, and the man fell back while holding his right eye. Bright red blood spurted from between his fingers. My mind spun with a mixture of regret for what I¡¯d done and excitement for having gone through with it. ¡°Shit! I¡¯ll kill you! I¡¯ll kill you!¡± The man was tenacious. Even though he had lost his right eye, he didn¡¯t give in. He reached out to me and screamed that he would kill me. I twisted my body and tried to escape, but he held onto my shoulders and finally grabbed my neck. ¡°Die!¡± I was in despair since I couldn¡¯t hold on anymore, and then the door opened with a loud bang and footsteps rushed into the room. ¡°Ophelia!¡± When the familiar voice called out my name, the giant body that was pinned on top of me flung away. ¡°¡­ Huh?¡± The one who appeared before the stunned me was a handsome young man with wavy black hair and deep blue eyes. He was holding a slender, silvery sword in one hand. And seeing him up close gave me goosebumps. ¡°Or¡­ pheus.¡± I thought a miracle had occurred. Or maybe I¡¯m dreaming? Unbelievable. It was Orpheus who had kicked that man away. He looked down at the writhing man with the most chilling expression I¡¯d ever seen, one that seemed to lower the temperature of the room by a few degrees. ¡°You sleazebag!¡± Orpheus said in a low voice. Then he sheathed his sword, crouched down beside me and put his arms around my back to help me up. ¡°Are you alright?¡± I wanted to ask him why he was here, but the words wouldn¡¯t come out of my mouth. Orpheus ¨D¨D£­ I finally called out his name. ¡°I¡¯m sorry I¡¯m late.¡± He hugged me so tight that I couldn¡¯t breathe. My body was wrapped up in warmth and I could smell the deep forest. Ah, why ¨D¨D¨D? I was perplexed by the tears that had suddenly begun to flow. I wasn¡¯t sad or afraid, so why were tears coming out of my eyes? Why can¡¯t I stop crying when all I feel is a strange sense of elevation? ¡°Ophelia, did you hurt your back¡­ on the shards? There¡¯s blood on your neck too.¡± When Orpheus looked at my face, his handsome face quickly changed into a horrifying one. I wanted to apologise to him as his handsome face twisted with anger. It looked far more terrifying than when a normal person¡¯s face twisted in anger. ¡°Umm¡­ I should have said this earlier, but your hands are stained with blood.¡± ¡°That¡¯s not what you¡¯re supposed to say,¡± Orpheus said as he glared at the man who was lying on the floor. He then picked me up carefully, so that he wouldn¡¯t touch the wound on my back. He didn¡¯t treat me roughly like the bald man. He touched me gently as if he was handling fragile goods ¨D¨D¨D. My heart leaped at the feelings of his arms wrapped around me. His white face was right in front of me as were his deep blue eyes. My cheeks heated up even though we were in this situation. ¡°Um, Orpheus¡­¡± ¡°Does it hurt?¡± ¡°A¡­ little. But I can handle this much.¡± I tried to smile to reassure him, but his expression grew colder. He walked to the man, who was facing upwards, with me still in his arms, looked down at him mercilessly and suddenly swung his leg. I didn¡¯t even have time to ask him what he was going to do. A crushing scream echoed in the room. Orpheus slammed the sole of his foot mercilessly into the man¡¯s flabby stomach. ¡°Orpheus?!¡± The fat body jumped and writhed, but Orpheus¡¯s anger didn¡¯t subside. He moved his long legs and stopped on the man¡¯s neck this time. ¡°Hey, what are you ¨D¨D¨D.¡± ¡°Shall I kill you?¡± The words that Orpheus had whispered sweetly as if he was confessing his love gave me goosebumps. His blue eyes that shone like jewels definitely had a murder in them. ¡°Orpheus, please wait.¡± ¡°It¡¯s easy. I just have to put a little pressure into my legs. ¨D¨D¨D What should I do? Should I kill him?¡± ¡°No, you can¡¯t. Don¡¯t kill him,¡± as I answered him, I was horrified by my own cold-heartedness. I didn¡¯t fear for this man¡¯s life. I just didn¡¯t want to make Orpheus a murderer. I didn¡¯t want him to get his hands dirty. Oh yeah, I stabbed a shard of the pottery into this man¡¯s right eye ¨D¨D¨D. I intensely regretted that I had done such a terrible thing after having done it. It was crazy to do something like that even though I was in danger and blood was rushing to my head. I¡¯m still twisted. ¡°I see. That¡¯s unfortunate,¡± Orpheus said while sounding really disappointed. Orpheus brought his foot down to the man¡¯s stomach once more, aiming for his vital point and knocking him out with ease. I looked down at the completely flattened man with an indescribably complicated feeling. ¡°Hey, Orpheus-kun. Can you stop leaving the small fries to me and rushing in by yourself?¡± Claude appeared from behind the wide open door. He was dressed simply in a white shirt and black pants and his hair was messy, but he carried a long sword at his waist. Renee was dressed in a manly outfit behind him. Her long brown hair was tied in a ponytail and she carried a blood-soaked sword in her right hand. ¡°Claude and Renee. You two came too¡­¡± You¡¯ve come to save me ¨D¨D¨D. I¡¯m sure my eyes are red and swollen, but Claude smiled brightly like always, waved his hand and said, ¡°Hey, Phelia. I¡¯m sorry I¡¯m late. Are you hurt?¡± ¡°¡­ She hurt her back and neck,¡± Orpheus answered. Claude¡¯s smile faded. He walked over to me and stared at my back. ¡°It¡¯s covered in blood. The wounds seem to be minor, but your back is all red. Did Lord Lagerfeld do this to you?¡± ¡°No, I got hurt by some shards¡­ Umm, Claude. Can you help Victoria up? The girl over there.¡± Orpheus was only helping me. He wasn¡¯t paying any attention to my unconscious half-sister. So, I asked Claude to help me. He gave me a brief reply, then went to pick up the limp and motionless Victoria. ¡°Alright. The Princess has been taken, so I¡¯ll just have to put up with this.¡± When I called his name fondly, he replied, ¡°I¡¯m just joking.¡± ¡°By the way, who¡¯s this?¡± ¡°My sister.¡± ¡°Oh, you did say you had a sister. Hmmm. You two don¡¯t look alike at all.¡± I didn¡¯t say it was because we weren¡¯t blood related. Renee had quickly tied up the man¡¯s arms and legs. Just as she finished, three armed men came from behind the door and under Claude¡¯s orders, took the tied man away. ¡°Now then, we have to take care of the two princesses. Shall we move to another room?¡± Chapter 39 - After a Difficult Time Translator: Blushy Editor: delishnoodles When we moved into the visitor¡¯s bedroom, the ropes around my hands and legs were untied and my hands were finally free. Since I had to take off my dress to receive medical treatment, the two men left the room and Renee treated the wounds on my neck and back. The dress I was wearing was bloody and dirty in places, so I borrowed a change of clothes from Victoria¡¯s closet. Renee helped me into the borrowed dress and Orpheus returned. She retrieved the bloodstained dress and left the room. ¡°How are you feeling?¡± Orpheus walked over to me as I was sitting on the bed. He stretched out his hand and stroked my cheek. ¡°I¡¯m okay. It hurts a little, but it¡¯s not too bad,¡± I felt a little embarrassed, so I answered while looking and he said in a calm voice, ¡°I see.¡± ¡°¡­ Where¡¯s Claude?¡± ¡°He went to check on Victoria.¡± ¡°I see. ¨D¨D¨D Um, Orpheus.¡± ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡± ¡°Thanks for saving me.¡± You showed up when I was about to give up. You rescued me from despair. The back of my eyelids heated up as I felt happy and loved at the same time. ¡°¡­ By the way, how did you know I was here?¡± I asked with a slightly trembling voice. Orpheus didn¡¯t seem to mind and answered indifferently, ¡°Because of Renee. She saw you leaving through the servant¡¯s doorway and thought it was suspicious, so she followed after you. Diana and Marion were freed, and you were captured instead, so she restrained the man who had come to deal with the two who had escaped and made him tell her who he was working for.¡± ¡°Deal with the two who had escaped¡­?¡± Orpheus sat down next to me and nodded. ¡°Diana and Orpheus saw the kidnappers, so they were probably going to kill them to keep their mouths shut.¡± Cold sweat trickled down my back. How can that be? Diana and Marion might have been killed if Renee hadn¡¯t been there. I had assumed that they wouldn¡¯t go to the trouble of catching the two after they had let them escape, but it seemed that I was wrong. In any case, I have to be thankful to Renee. They were saved and I¡¯m alive because of her, the excellent guard. ¡°But you¡¯re reckless. Marion told me what you did¡­ I can¡¯t believe that you would act so foolishly.¡± ¡°¡­ I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°This won¡¯t end just because you apologise. If we hadn¡¯t saved you in time, then you would be dead right now.¡± I shrugged as I was scolded in an unusually harsh tone. Orpheus was angry. Really angry. The cold air drifting from next to me felt horrible and I couldn¡¯t give him any excuses. ¡°I should have forced you home instead of letting this happen. I didn¡¯t want you to hate me, so I pretended to be understanding, but that was a mistake.¡± ¡°But¡­ even if I had returned to the Rosenstein Mansion, that man would have thought of some other way to kidnap me. He even lured me out by using Diana and Marion as hostages.¡± ¡°How do you kidnap someone who can¡¯t even step out of their room?¡± So, if he had forcibly taken me back to the Rosenstein Mansion at that time, then¡­ would I have been put under house arrest so that I would never be able to escape again? I was getting more and more frightened and couldn¡¯t reply, then I heard a sigh. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, but I¡¯m not going to give you anymore time to think about it. Whatever your intentions are, I have no intention of letting you go, and I¡¯m not going to divorce you.¡± ¡°About that¡­¡± A strange urge burst from within me when I was about to tell him that I wanted to start over with him again. ¡°Say, Orpheus. Do you like me?¡± Immediately after I asked this, his blue eyes widened to the point where they almost popped out of his eye socket, and a sigh escaped from his nicely shaped lips. ¡°Of course, I do. I like you. I love you¡­¡± ¡°Then may I touch you? I really want to touch you.¡± When Orpheus nodded, I gently touched his puzzled white face with my hair. I stroked his cheeks like he had done to me earlier and brushed his black hair from his forehead. I traced his shoulders, arms and chest. I felt his body and contours. ¡°¡­ Can I give you a hug?¡± It was frustrating to wait for an answer, so I put my knees on the bed and hugged him as if covering myself with his body. Orpheus told me that he loves me, so I thought that I didn¡¯t have to ask for this. His body was bigger than mine and motionless like a statue, and I hugged him as tightly as I could. Our pulsating heartbeats overlapped with each other. ¡°Lewis,¡± I whispered his real name into his ear. The name that I never had the chance to call and was tucked away in the back of my mind for a long time. ¡°¡­ You remembered?¡± ¡°Yes, I do. It¡¯s your name after all.¡± Neither Diana nor Juris knew his real name. He had only told me. A name that was so precious and lovely wasn¡¯t easy to forget. ¡°I love you. I love you. I love you more than anyone and anything.¡± ¡°Ophelia.¡± ¡°I¡¯ve made up my mind. I¡¯ve decided to stay by your side from now on¡­¡± Orpheus probably didn¡¯t hear the words that I had uttered after that. Unfortunately, there was a knock on the door. ¡°Your sister is awake¡­ Ah, sorry, my bad.¡± Claude had returned, and I quickly pulled myself away from Orpheus. However, he had seen the whole thing, so he teased me, ¡°Were you in the middle of something?¡± ¡°Uoah¡­ I¡¯m sorry to hug you at a time like this.¡± ¡°It¡¯s alright. I¡¯ll have you hug me later too.¡± ¡°What?! Th-that¡¯s¡­¡± I was puzzled and Orpheus said with a thorny voice, ¡°Your Highness.¡± ¡°Isn¡¯t a little bit fine? You¡¯re a narrow-minded husband. It¡¯s not fair for you to hog her all to yourself. I was the one who was supposed to rescue Phelia, but you got a head start and pretended to be a prince in shining armour.¡± ¡°Ophelia is my wife. It¡¯s only natural for me to rescue her before anyone else.¡± ¡°Hahaha. That¡¯s funny of you to say. You¡¯ve been neglecting her this whole time and didn¡¯t care for her at all.¡± ¡°Umm¡­ Claude and Orpheus.¡± I timidly stepped in between the two of them, hoping to stop the exchange that would intensify if I had just stood around and watched. ¡°What is it, Phelia?¡± ¡°What¡¯s wrong, Ophelia?¡± Both answered almost at the same time. They were so in tune with each other that I thought that they might actually be able to get along. However, they obviously didn¡¯t seem to get along. One of them was blatantly frowning while the other was clicking his tongue. How immature¡­ Half-astonished, I suggested that I would like to go and visit Victoria, and they both surprisingly nodded, probably because they were feeling displeased. Victoria was lying on the bed in her room. However, she shook off her nanny¡¯s restraint as soon as she saw us, sat up and smiled firmly. ¡°Sister, you¡¯re here.¡± I gently hugged her petite body. ¡°Thanks for helping me. How are you feeling? Does your head still hurt?¡± ¡°I¡¯m fine. It¡¯s just a little bump. ¨D¨D¨D Hey, Sister. What happened to that man?¡± ¡°We handed him over to the guards who came,¡± Claude answered. ¡°He¡¯ll be going for attempted murder, kidnapping and confinement.¡± Claude leaned against the wall with his arms crossed as he stared at Victoria. ¡°He¡¯ll probably be stripped of his title too.¡± ¡°Hmph. I see. Serves him right.¡± Victoria laughed ironically and everyone except me looked surprised. ¡°Serves him right, you say¡­? Your father was arrested, but you¡¯re alright with that? This house will be destroyed.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not alright with it or anything. He committed a crime. He deserves to be arrested for that. I hope he never comes out.¡± ¡°Victoria-sama,¡± her nanny scolded her in a small voice, but she turned her head away. Claude smiled wryly. ¡°Perhaps you hated your father?¡± ¡°Yes. I loathe him. I even smashed him on the head with a flower vase because I hate him so much.¡± Victoria¡¯s smile was very charming, and the fact that she was unfazed by the news of her father¡¯s arrest showed just how much she hated him. ¡°Oh, so that fragment was from a vase? By the way, did you know that Ophelia was injured by that?¡± ¡°What? Injured by that!?¡± ¡°It was just a little cut, it¡¯s nothing serious.¡± ¡°Of course, it was! You had blood all over your back!¡± Even Orpheus said too much¡­ It was hard to calm Victoria down as she turned pale and apologised. I rubbed her back and she kept crying even though I told her it had already been treated. When she had calmed down, she asked Orpheus and Claude how they knew her sister was here and what had happened to the people who were outside. She nearly slipped off the bed when she found out that Claude is a prince. ¡°What!? P-Prince?! This person is?!¡± Claude smiled at her impressively as she looked at him as if he was lying. ¡°It sounds as if you want to say something else. What is it you want to say?¡± ¡°Eh, ah, I, I¡¯m sorry! I didn¡¯t mean to sound like that¡­ Sister! How the hell do you know him?! Why did the Prince come to rescue you!?¡± ¡°Well, a lot happened¡­¡± ¡°I want to know everything!¡± It would take a long time if I had to explain everything, so I told her that I will tell her everything later to calm her down. Then, I had Claude and the nanny leave the room. I had something that I wanted to tell Victoria and Orpheus. When they left, I honestly told them that the man had said that my real father wasn¡¯t him, but Orpheus¡¯s foster father, Ernst. ¡°He said that he had never slept with my mother, so there was no way that he could have a child with my mother. He said that I was the child between my mother and Ernst-sama, the person who she loved. I don¡¯t have any proof, but it didn¡¯t seem like he was lying¡­¡± ¡ºYou¡¯re that man¡¯s, Ernst¡¯s, daughter. You can tell straight away from the colour of your eyes. They¡¯re blue, an even darker blue than Louise¡¯s. It¡¯s an annoying colour, just like Ernst¡¯s. They make me want to kill you.¡»That man had hatefully said. Your eye colour is the same as your father¡¯s. He seemed a little sad for some reason. ¡°Sister and I were never sisters,¡± Victoria was the first to break the silence. She was stunned by this surprising revelation. ¡°But wait. If that¡¯s the case, then wouldn¡¯t that mean that Sister and brother-in-law are actually biological siblings? That¡¯s why you both have black hair and blue eyes, and your auras are somewhat the same¡­¡± ¡°I guess you could say that we¡¯re siblings, but we¡¯re actually not related,¡± Orpheus denied this before I could even speak. ¡°We didn¡¯t make this public, but I¡¯m adopted. I¡¯m not Ernst¡¯s biological son. So, our marriage isn¡¯t incestuous. ¨D¨D¨D Ophelia, what do you want to do now? If you want to change your family register and come forward as the official Rosenstein heiress, then I can help you.¡± ¡°No!¡± I shook my head, stating that wasn¡¯t what I wanted. It¡¯s enough to know that I¡¯m not that man¡¯s daughter. I still have mixed feelings, but now I can completely cut him out of my life. From now on, I don¡¯t have to be tied down by that nasty thing called ¡®blood¡¯. I will only look forward. ¡°I don¡¯t want to change my family register or be a heiress. I just wanted you two to know this. From now on, I will always be your wife, Orpheus, and I will always be your sister, Victoria. That will never change.¡± Then, we took a carriage and headed to Claude¡¯s mansion. It was already late at night, and someone had proposed that we stay the night at the Lagerfeld mansion, but I didn¡¯t want to stay in a house with nothing but gloomy memories, so I had them prepare the carriage. Orpheus wanted to take me back to the Rosenstein mansion, but he reluctantly agreed to go to Claude¡¯s mansion when Claude told me that Diana, Marion and Claire were waiting for my return at his mansion. I wanted to take Victoria with me, but she couldn¡¯t be moved because she had a head injury, so I asked her to stay behind and told her that I will come to pick her up at a later date. The officials that Renee and Claude had brought with them also stayed at the Lagerfeld mansion to help with the aftermath. It was two hours after the date had changed when the carriage arrived at Claude¡¯s mansion. The entrance hall was still lit, and the old butler greeted us. The gatekeeper had probably told him that we had returned. ¡°Welcome home.¡± Rushed footsteps drowned the sound of his voice. Monica, Susanna and Claire rushed into the entrance hall. ¡°Ophelia-sama!¡± ¡°Madam!¡± They had woken up and were waiting for us. But they didn¡¯t give me time to be moved. They were making a big fuss. ¡°Ophelia-sama! How can you be so reckless!?¡± ¡°Ah! I¡¯m so glad! I¡¯m so glad that you¡¯re alright!¡± ¡°Why didn¡¯t you say anything?! Why do you always disappear by yourself?! Why are you wearing a bandage around your neck!?¡± I was surrounded by the three maids. One was angry, one was happy for my safety and one was crying. All three of them were talking at once, so I couldn¡¯t even answer them. I tried to apologise but Monica barked, ¡°We¡¯re not done talking just because you¡¯ve apologised!¡± I asked Orpheus and Claude for help, but Orpheus just kept quiet since he thought that I deserved this, and Claude turned away and held his laughter in. Heartless~¡­ I stood frozen in the middle of the chaos and I heard my name being called from somewhere else. At the top of the stairs leading from the entrance hall to the second floor stood Diana, Marion ¨D¨D¨D and even Juris. Juris was holding Diana¡¯s hand as the three of them rushed down the stairs. ¡°Madam, I¡¯m glad to see that you¡¯re alright.¡± ¡°Juris¡­ I¡¯m sorry I caused an uproar. ¨D¨D¨D Diana and Marion, I¡¯m glad to see that you¡¯re both alright.¡± ¡°It¡¯s thanks to you, Madam. You let us escape.¡± The three agitated maids moved aside to let the three of them pass. Ah, I wanted to see you. The next thing I knew, I was surrounded by the people who I wanted to see again. My heart felt warm, and I was so happy that I was speechless. Diana reached out her hand to touch me. I took her delicate slender hand, stepped forward and said, ¡°I¡¯m here.¡± Diana cried. She cried while clinging to me and put all her strength into the arm that was around my back. ¡°You¡¯re an idiot. You¡¯re a moron. You¡¯re such an idiot to use your own life as a shield.¡± Diana and I called each other¡¯s names in a friendly way while hugging each other. ¡°I¡¯m sorry for worrying you, but I¡¯m glad you¡¯re okay. It¡¯s nice to see you again.¡± ¡°Ophelia¡­¡± ¡°Say¡­¡± As I was patting Diana¡¯s back, Claude said, ¡°Isn¡¯t this a bit different?¡± ¡°¡­ What do you mean?¡± ¡°I was expecting her to be evil, but she¡¯s more normal than I had expected. Ophelia is definitely more beautiful though. I don¡¯t know why you all were on her side. You all have bad taste.¡± Diana¡¯s shoulders, which had been shaking slightly, stopped shaking, and an awkward silence filled the air. Orpheus frowned, Juris turned cold, Marion looked offended, and the rest of the maids were completely frozen. ¡°Claude, umm¡­¡± ¡°Juris, right? You, too. Why don¡¯t you just get with her if you¡¯re brave enough to glare at a royal member because you like her even if you don¡¯t know who I am. Phelia can¡¯t move forward if you don¡¯t. She holes up in her dark room, puzzling over what to do with you two. Poor thing. If you want to make it up to Phelia, then hurry up and get married. You¡¯re the only man who wants her anyway.¡± What is he saying¨D¨D¨D? I glared at Claude since there were things that could be said and things that can¡¯t. But as soon as his eyes met mine, he smiled brightly. ¡°I¡¯m doing this for you, Phelia.¡± ¡°I¡­¡± ¡°Your Highness, we have different statuses,¡± Juris said. ¡°I¡¯m a servant and she is ¨D¨D¨D.¡± ¡°This has nothing to do with status!¡± Diana turned towards the bitter Juris and screamed, ¡°Status doesn¡¯t matter! How many times do I have to tell you for you to understand?!¡± When Juris opened his mouth in confusion, Claude interrupted again, ¡°Woah, a lovers quarrel? Give me a break, it¡¯s the middle of the night.¡± I stopped Claude, who was laughing like a child who had successfully pulled off a prank, when I realised that things were going to go out of hand again, ¡°Don¡¯t complicate things. They¡¯re going to get married anyway.¡± ¡°Oh. Really?¡± ¡°We made a promise. ¨D¨D¨D It took me a while, but I¡¯ve made up my mind. Diana and Juris, you¡¯ll keep your promise to me, right?¡± Diana said she would marry Juris if I start over with Orpheus. So, I¡¯m going to ask the two of them to marry. ¡°¡­ You forgive me?¡± Diana said anxiously. ¡°Of course,¡± I nodded. ¡°Well, I don¡¯t know what¡¯s going on, but they¡¯re getting married after all. Orpheus-kun, do you approve of this?¡± Orpheus nodded. ¡°I want them to get married as well. I want them to be happy together.¡± The hall fell silent again, but it wasn¡¯t an awkward silence like before. Marion was in tears; Monica had her hand over her mouth in amazement and Susanna and Claire¡¯s eyes were sparkling. ¡°What¡¯s with this charade? It¡¯s like I¡¯m watching a ridiculous play.¡± Claude shrugged as if he was fed up with this, then he scratched his bed hair, ¡°Well, whatever.¡± ¡°Now that we know that Phelia is safe, and we¡¯ve had our emotional reunion, let¡¯s get some rest. I¡¯m tired.¡± ¡°¡­ I¡¯m sorry, Claude. I¡¯ve caused you a lot of trouble.¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine.¡± Claude stood beside me and patted my head as if he was comforting me. ¡°I decided that I will do anything for you. ¨D¨D¨D Susanna and Monica, show Lord Rosenstein and his cousin to their rooms. Marcel, you show Juris to his room. And, Phelia, you¡¯re alright with staying in the detached building, right?¡± We all stayed at Claude¡¯s house on that day. We all went to the rooms that were assigned to us. When I entered the detached building, I was greeted by the nostalgic scent of roses. Red, white, yellow, pink and orange. The number of roses had dwindled, but the roses that Orpheus had given me were still blooming with vivid colours. Perhaps sensing that I was too tired to stand, Claire helped me change without saying anything. When she saw that bandage around my back, she screamed, but she didn¡¯t ask me any questions. I¡¯m tired ¨D¨D¨D. It¡¯s been a traumatic day. I was kidnapped, carried off, made up with Victoria and then that man took me something shocking. I was strangled, and when I was about to give up, Orpheus came to my rescue along with Claude and Renee. It was wrong for me to think that no one would like or love me. There are many people who accept me, and they welcomed me warmly even though I¡¯ve done a lot of selfish things and caused them a lot of trouble. I can¡¯t stay awake anymore, I¡¯m tired ¨D¨D¨D. Too many things happened in one day and both my mind and body are tired. My headache had been really bad since earlier, and I don¡¯t think I¡¯ll be able to think about anything else tonight. I said goodnight to Claire and dived into bed. It didn¡¯t take me long to close my eyes. My mind drifted to sleep. Chapter 40 - Claude’s Love I felt a strange feeling that I couldn¡¯t describe when I woke up . It was as if the load that was caught at the back of my throat had been removed, as if I had lost something and gained something more important in its place¡­ It was a sudden change that I could see clearly. I was a completely different person today than I was yesterday. The sun was shining bright through the curtain. The familiar garden was outside the window, the trees, flowers and fountain were still there and the events from yesterday seemed like a dream. So many things had happened¡­ I touched the bandage on my neck and Claire came into the room to wake me up. Claire didn¡¯t go easy on me at all even though I had just woken up. Her face was red with anger as she lectured me on my reckless behaviour yesterday. She was still angry when I finished getting ready and was eating breakfast. When I brought up Diana and Juris¡¯s marriage to her, she cheered up and cried while laughing. ¡°I¡¯m glad they¡¯re getting married,¡± she said. ¡°Now Madam can finally be happy without worrying about anyone else.¡± ¡°Will you be happier with that than Diana and Juris¡¯s marriage?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± I was joking when I said that, but she quickly agreed. I felt baffled. ¡°Claire, that¡¯s¡­¡± ¡°Honestly, I think Diana-sama and Juris are cunning. They took advantage of you, but you didn¡¯t blame them for it, and they ended up with the person they love in the end. They relied too much on your kindness. Master does as well.¡± I widened my eyes at Claire who had said that cheerfully. Apparently, her anger hadn¡¯t subsided. She had only changed who she was angry at¡­ ¡°Of course, I know you don¡¯t blame them. I only accepted it because you said you forgave them and the Master. I¡¯m happy as long as you¡¯re satisfied and happy¡­ I¡¯m sorry, I know I¡¯m being rude, but I wanted to know that there are people who think like me too.¡± I went to the garden by myself after that. I wanted to take my time since I knew that this might be the last time I would walk through this garden. I walked on the short, mowed grass while looking at the trees, flowerbeds and the fountain. I watched as the water spout up the fountain and fell down, it¡¯s crystal-like drops glittering in the sunlight¡­ I liked this square fountain for some reason. Even when I was holed up in my room while pondering, I would stand by the window and look at the fountain. ¡°Do you like this garden?¡± I heard a voice and turned around to see Claude standing there as a fresh breeze of wind blew. He wasn¡¯t dressed as Prince Claudius, but as my good friend Claude Ritter. I squinted at the summer sunlight and his dazzling white shirt. ¡°Yes. It¡¯s a very nice garden. You must have a very good gardener.¡± ¡°I¡¯ll tell the gardener you said that. I¡¯m sure he¡¯ll be happy to hear that.¡± Claude stood beside me and smiled faintly. His verdure eyes stared at the fountain. ¡°If you like this garden then you can¡­¡± His verdure eyes which had been staring at the garden fixed onto me. The wind blew, shaking his soft blonde hair. ¡°You should just marry me. Marry me and this will be yours. This whole mansion will be yours.¡± ¡°Claude, I¡­¡± ¡°You changed me.¡± My words were interrupted by a calm and clear voice. He sounded quiet and earnest, and I couldn¡¯t help but listen to what he had to say. ¡°I thought I could only love someone of the same sex, but you¡¯re different. You were special to me. I thought you would divorce him and come to me. I honestly did. I wouldn¡¯t give you a hard time, and I could love you more deeply than that man.¡± Ah, he¡¯s serious¡­ I couldn¡¯t ask him to stop joking like before. I knew that Claude really loved me. I finally understood that he was looking at me as someone of the opposite sex and not just as a friend. But I couldn¡¯t answer him. Claude helped me so many times. He supported me when I felt like I was falling apart. He pushed me to move forward. He gave me time to think. I can¡¯t thank him enough. I could grant him anything but this. Marriage is the only wish of his that I can¡¯t fulfil. Even if Orpheus hated me and abandoned me. He¡¯s the only person I love. I looked down at the falling droplets, at the spreading ripples and at the marble edge reflecting the light. I stood still, unable to move my lips or even my fingertips. ¡°It¡¯s okay, I understand,¡± Claude smiled wryly and said, feeling sorry for me since I could only remain silent. ¡°I¡¯ve known your answer from the beginning. You love him.¡± ¡°I¡­¡± I couldn¡¯t say I love Orpheus because I was afraid of hurting him even more. I can¡¯t say that I love Orpheus. I kept my lips tightly pressed together to keep the meaningless apologies from flowing out my mouth. The water from the fountain continued to fall while making a refreshing sound. ¡°Have you made up your mind to go back?¡± I replied after hesitating for a bit, ¡°Yes.¡± He noticed. He realised that I had decided to return to Orpheus and start over. I gulped as I tried to stare back into his verdure eyes. Claude had a gentle smile on his face that made my heart ache. His smile was so beautiful shining under the strong summer sun that it made me want to cry. ¡°Your reputation in social circles is terrible. It¡¯s going to be very hard for you to restore your reputation.¡± ¡°Still, I¡¯ll do it for him¡­¡± I couldn¡¯t say anything else because Claude grabbed my arm and held me tight. The next thing I knew, I was in his arms and his golden hair swayed at the corner of my eyes. ¡°I love you, Ophelia. I love you.¡± ¡°Claude¡­¡± ¡°I want you to be happy this time.¡± I can¡¯t take it anymore. I tried to hold back, but an avalanche of emotions poured out of my eyes and soaked my cheeks. ¡°Claude.¡± ¡°Yeah?¡± ¡°Thanks. Thank you for everything. Thanks to you¡­¡± ¡°Oh no. Why¡¯re you talking like we¡¯ll never see each other again. Our friendship is going to last forever.¡± When he said it like that, my tears wouldn¡¯t stop. The kinder you are, the sadder I get and the more choked up I get. ¡°Thanks.¡± ¡°I¡¯d rather you kiss me than say thank you, but your husband will kill me if I force a kiss on you, so I¡¯m not going to do it. He¡¯s glaring at me right now too.¡± ¡°¡­ Huh?¡± What are you talking about¡­? I pulled back a little and looked up at him and saw that his gentle smile was almost turning into a mischievous one. ¡°But I suppose he¡¯ll forgive me for this,¡± Claude said, then he pressed his lips against my cheek. A soft, warm feeling grazed my lips and the warmth that had enveloped my body faded away. Dammit¡­ I felt a tinge of remorse when I realised that I had been kissed by another man even though I am someone¡¯s wife. I had been kissed on my face and not at the back of my hand. ¡°It¡¯s not okay. What are you thinking?¡± I thought I heard a grumpy voice, and this time I was pulled back. I was enveloped in another warmth when I was about to fall down. A firm arm wrapped around me and rubbed the area where Claude¡¯s lips had touched. I twisted my neck and looked up and saw a face even more handsome than Claude¡¯s, and sapphire blue eyes so deep that they seemed to absorb me. How long had he been in the garden? I didn¡¯t feel his presence at all. ¡°You¡¯re really narrow-minded. It¡¯s fine, isn¡¯t it? I only kissed her a little. The princess has chosen you.¡± ¡°¡­ Your Highness.¡± ¡°Yeah, yeah.¡± Claude raised both his hands and said without remorse, ¡°I¡¯m sorry for kissing your wife.¡± Then he ruffled his fringe. ¡°Orpheus. I¡¯m going to be a man and back away, so don¡¯t give Phelia a hard time again. If you do anything to make her cry, then I¡¯ll take her from you and I won¡¯t give her back.¡± There was no reply. Instead, he tightened his embrace. Claude shrugged, turned around and waved his hand in the air as he walked away. I called out his name since his back looked so lonely, but he didn¡¯t turn back. He eventually disappeared behind a tall tree in the garden. Is this the right thing to do¡­? I felt the arms around me loosen while I was feeling depressed. I turned around, remembering that I was alone with Orpheus. There was something that I needed to tell him right now. Words that I should have told him earlier, ¨D¨D¨D I needed to tell him that I decided to return to the Rosenstein mansion and start over with him. I need to tell him that I wanted to face forward. ¡°Orpheus.¡± I took the hand that was trying to cup my cheek and squeezed it tightly. I stared at his eyes which hadn¡¯t changed since I first met him. His eyes still held the same earnestness in them that made me want to look away, and still held the same intense emotion that made me want to run away. ¡°I¡¯ve hurt you. I¡¯ve made a lot of mistakes. So, I want to stay by your side and make up for that.¡± Divorcing Orpheus and leaving the Rosenstein mansion won¡¯t make up for that. It would be meaningless even if I joined the monastery and prayed to God. I can atone by¡­ ¡°The only way I can atone is by restoring the honour of the Rosenstein House and myself and make you happy this time. I¡¯ll do anything to make this happen, no matter how hard it is. I¡¯m ready to give up everything.¡± I bowed my head deeply while holding Orpheus¡¯s hand. ¡°I¡¯m begging you. Please give me another chance. Let me start over with you¡­¡± He grabbed me by my shoulders and forced me to look up before I could finish, then he hugged me. ¡°You¡¯ll stay with me?¡± Orpheus¡¯s voice was shaking. The arm which was wrapped around me and the hand that was stroking my head were both trembling. ¡°Yes. I will never leave you again. I won¡¯t leave you even if you hate me.¡± ¡°It¡¯s impossible for me to hate you. You¡¯re my everything.¡± I closed my eyes and listened to the feeling in his chest and the sound of his heartbeat. I tried to use all my senses to feel Orpheus. I¡¯m happy. I¡¯m so happy that I feel faint. I wouldn¡¯t care if I died right now. ¡°I¡¯m sorry. I can¡¯t think of anything clever to say at times like this.¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine. I don¡¯t need anything else as long as you let me stay with you like this.¡± I really meant it. The person I love is right beside me, holding me close. I don¡¯t need anything else. I don¡¯t need sweet smiles or kind words. I want to give more than take. ¡°I love you,¡± I told him wholeheartedly. I love you. I love you. I repeated as if in delirium. ¡°Orpheus, I love you.¡± I don¡¯t need a reply. I know how Orpheus feels even without words¡­ I covered his lips as he was about to say something and kissed him. I love you¡­ I stretched out my arms and clung to his neck. I relaxed my body and let myself be drowned in his warmth and scent. ??????? The Rosenstein mansion welcomed me with its beautiful appearance which hadn¡¯t changed since I left. The white mansion shone against the blue sky. The garden was lush and green with dark summer flowers and roses blooming in it. When I entered the hall, Juris, Diana and Marion were waiting for me. They smiled and welcomed me home. ¡°Umm¡­¡± I was happy to be greeted by them, but I couldn¡¯t say that I was back because all the servants were lined up in the hall which was normally deserted. ¡°What is this all about?¡± I think I¡¯ve seen this scene before. I believe it was on the day I married into this house. The servants were all lined up in the hall on that day as well and they all bowed in unison as soon as I entered the hall. Just like now. ¡°I apologise.¡± Elza, the head maid, apologised. She walked up to me and bowed deeply once more. ¡°I apologize for failing to supervise the servants.¡± What is she talking about? I tilted my head in confusion, and the next thing she said made me think I had misheard her, ¡°I¡¯ll take responsibility and leave today.¡± ¡°¡­ Excuse me?¡± What the hell is going on? Why are the servants bowing to me? I¡¯m not sure why Elza is apologising to me and submitting her resignation. I have no idea what¡¯s going on. ¡°Why are you¡­¡± ¡°I explained the situation to her and cleared up the misunderstanding,¡± Diana said. ¡°I told her everything, including why you were behaving the way you were and about me and Juris.¡± I looked at the servants who were looking anxious, and they all apologised, ¡°I am sorry,¡± ¡°I apologise,¡± ¡°I misunderstood the situation,¡± then they bowed their heads and stopped moving. I finally understood what was going on. They were apologising for treating me coldly and for speaking ill of me behind my back. ¡°I¡¯m sorry for overstepping my boundaries, but I wanted to do something for you.¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine¡­ you didn¡¯t overstep your boundaries.¡± Normally, I would have to explain the situation to each of them, clear up the misunderstanding, then bow and apologise, but Diana took over that role for me. I don¡¯t think she was overstepping her boundaries. I can¡¯t thank her enough if the misunderstanding was really cleared up thanks to her. ¡°So, what do you want to do? I¡¯ll leave the decision to you,¡± Orpheus, who had been watching in silence, said. He crossed his arms with an unreadable expression on his face and said something that made me doubt my ears again. ¡°If you want, I can replace not only Elza, but all the other servants as well.¡± The servants gasped. However, none of them objected. I guess Orpheus and Juris may have told them that it was up to me whether or not they can continue working here in the future. They didn¡¯t have to do that¡­ Orpheus¡¯s drastic announcement made me slump my shoulders and I told the servants to raise their heads. ¡°You can¡¯t do that. I won¡¯t allow you to quit. Elza, you can¡¯t quit either.¡± I took Elza¡¯s hand; the dry, crackled hands of a hard-worker. I gently wrapped my hand around hers and looked at her hands as if they were something very important. I will not make any selfish assumptions or run away. I will face her head-on this time. ¡°I need you, Elza. I must make amends, and I need to restore the honour that has fallen to the ground. I need your strength and support for that.¡± I will be a perfect and impeccable lady, and I will clear my name. I will be a good wife who people will praise. I need the help of Elza, the senior maid, to do this. As the Countess, I need her help to manage the residence and keep the servants in line. I also have a lot to learn. ¡°Please don¡¯t quit. Stay here.¡± Her expression, which was normally stiff and stern, twisted painfully. ¡°I¡¯m¡­ strict.¡± ¡°I know. But you act like that for Orpheus, right?¡± I had misunderstood Elza and assumed that she hated me. But I was wrong. She was worried about me in her own way. I want to start over from the beginning¡­ Elza shook her head and smiled slightly. It was the first time I had ever seen her smile. ¡°It¡¯s also for you, Ophelia-sama.¡± I knew it would be okay. I¡¯m sure I can start over with her. I returned Elza¡¯s smile and let go of her hand. I looked at the faces of the servants in the room to make sure they were alright. I breathed out, sorted my unorganised feelings, and frankly said the words that came to my mind. ¡°We¡¯ve made a lot of mistakes. I¡¯ve also misunderstood you all. I should have talked to you more,¡± I paused. I suddenly felt anxious, wondering if I had the right to say this. The servants wouldn¡¯t have been so cold if I had behaved better¡­ As soon as I thought that I lost the confidence to say something arrogant. I felt something warm touch my back while I was looking down. Orpheus was standing beside me with his hand on my back. The warmth of his deep blue eyes encouraged me, and I cheered up. I¡¯m sure I can make them understand¡­ Nothing will begin if I don¡¯t say these words. Nothing. I raised my head and stood proudly. I took a step forward in order to become the Countess Rosenstein that everyone recognises as being worthy of Orpheus and not as the hated Countess Rosenstein. ¡°Let¡¯s start over again. Let us all start over again.¡± Chapter 41 - Epilogue The garden at dusk was dyed in the same shade of red as the sky and there was a pleasant, fresh breeze blowing in the air instead of a hot, humid breeze that blew in the daytime. The trees in the garden swayed and a sweet scent drifted in the air from out of nowhere. ¡°What¡¯s wrong, Sister?¡± I stopped and looked up at the dark scarlet sky. Victoria and Diana, who were ahead of me, looked back. Victoria¡¯s chestnut curly hair and Diana¡¯s almost white golden hair swayed softly in the wind, causing their different aromas to drift about in the garden. It was the scent of flowers and fruit. ¡°I was just watching the sunset. It¡¯s even more beautiful today.¡± ¡°It is. It¡¯s an amazing colour. It looks like blood.¡± When Victoria looked up at the sky and described the red glowing sunset in graphic detail, Diana, who was holding onto Victoria¡¯s arm, giggled. ¡°It looks like blood¡­ that¡¯s very like Vicky to say that.¡± ¡°It¡¯s really that colour. It¡¯s bright red. ¨D¨D¨D Ah, there¡¯s lilies blooming over there. You like lilies don¡¯t you, Diane? I¡¯ll take you over to touch them.¡± ¡°Thanks. But I¡¯d like it if you could allow me to touch them in a way that won¡¯t get pollen on my hands since it¡¯s hard to get it off.¡± ¡°Alright.¡± I walked behind them while watching them smile at each other. ¡°Sister, quickly,¡± Victoria urged, but Diana told Victoria off. ¡°She¡¯ll fall down if she rushes.¡± ¡°Ah, you¡¯re right. I¡¯m sorry, Sister. Take your time, so you don¡¯t fall.¡± Victoria and Diana walked hand in hand and the skirts of their gorgeous dresses swayed seductively behind them. The scene looked like a landscape painting of paradise, and I thought that Claude would love to paint this scene if he saw it. ¡°It¡¯s been a year since then¡­¡± I suddenly recalled and muttered with deep emotion as I gently caressed my stomach which had begun to swell. The seasons passed quickly, and a year had passed since then. A year had passed in the blink of an eye. Many things happened during that time. First, Victoria came to the Rosenstein mansion. The Lagerfeld House was ruined after that incident and their fief and mansion were sold off, so Orpheus willingly took her in. Victoria, with her cheerful personality, quickly adjusted to life at the Rosenstein mansion. She got along well with Diana and the servants. However, she seemed to have a hard time dealing with her brother-in-law, Orpheus and said, ¡°He¡¯s a handsome man, but he¡¯s scary since I can¡¯t tell what he¡¯s thinking.¡± Victoria is a little too energetic and Orpheus is always calm and collected, so their personalities might not match. Claude and Victoria became bickering friends, and they would argue whenever he came to visit. I guess they like talking to each other since they were both quick-witted. When I pointed this out, Victoria blushed and denied it, but I think she probably likes Claude. One time, Claude painted Victoria¡¯s profile on a whim. She pretended to be angry and tore off the picture, but I saw her secretly fold it up and put it in her pocket. She still treasures it and sometimes sneakily looks at it. I think Claude and Victoria make a good match, but I wonder what Claude thinks about Victoria. She¡¯s much more attractive than I am. Their personalities match. I would be delighted if he forgot his feelings for me and got together with her, but perhaps that¡¯s too much to hope for. Diana and Juris got married a month after Victoria moved into the Rosenstein mansion. They had a small wedding in a church with only their relatives and instead of moving into a new house, they began their newly-married life in the Rosenstein mansion. They did this because I had suggested it. Juris was working as a live-in worker, so I thought it would be better for both of them to live in the mansion since they could spend more time together. Both of them were reluctant and were looking for a new house to live in, but Orpheus and I persuaded them not to. I wanted Diana and Juris to be happy, so I was thrilled to see them being intimate and happy. I was glad that I had decided to start over with Juris. Claire said the two were sly, but I still want the people who are close to me to smile forever. I don¡¯t want them to be unhappy. So, I was satisfied with this no matter what other people said. All I can pray for is that the two will have a child together. Since that day, I¡¯ve been working hard to clear my name and become a perfect and impeccable Countess Rosenstein. I¡¯m making steady progress, step by step, but it¡¯s not an easy road. Thanks to Diana, I was able to build trust with the servants faster than I had expected, but it was more difficult to restore my tarnished reputation than I imagined because of the arrest of my father, Marquis Lagerfeld. I changed my behaviour, participated in various charitable events, and went to evening parties and tea parties with Orpheus, but people said that I¡¯m up to something again or that I¡¯m taking advantage of Orpheus because he didn¡¯t want to get divorced while giving me cold stares. Sometimes people cursed me to my face, ¡°You despicable criminal¡¯s daughter,¡± and sometimes people surrounded me and poured wine on me while Orpheus wasn¡¯t around. Orpheus, who couldn¡¯t stand this, once told me that I could quit if it was too hard, but I didn¡¯t give up. I knew from the beginning that this would happen. Restoring my reputation wasn¡¯t something that can happen in six months or even a year. It takes a long time to improve a bad impression. I accepted all the abuse and cold stares that were a result of my own foolishness and kept trying to get the people to accept me. I tried to be a good wife both outside and inside the mansion. Orpheus was always there for me. No matter what was said or done to me, I was fine as long as I believed I was doing this for my beloved. I could bear it no matter how hard it was. It wasn¡¯t until about half a year later that there was a big change. This rumour began circulating in social circles: ¡°The Earl and Countess Rosenstein are in love with each other, but Countess Rosenstein acted like a hateful person for her husband because of a misunderstanding. But now, the misunderstanding has been cleared up and they are back to being a harmonious couple.¡± This was more truth than rumour, but as soon as this started to reach people, surprisingly, the abuse and cold stares that had been thrown my way had suddenly decreased and people started treating me friendlier. Of course, there are also people who don¡¯t believe this. The young ladies who admired Orpheus didn¡¯t believe it at all. However, the rumour brought about a surprisingly dramatic change. I was accepted by the people, little by little, and I was surrounded by people whenever I was alone even though they didn¡¯t talk to me when Orpheus was by my side. Many people approached me to find out the truth behind the rumours, so I took advantage of this opportunity to proclaim my love for Orpheus and used my social and conversational skills to try and reverse the bad impression they had of me. My reputation as a bad wife hadn¡¯t completely been erased, but thanks to my efforts, more people were being friendly to me by the day, and I even made friends close to my age. Thanks to the rumour that someone had spread, my reputation and the Rosenstein honour, which had been frowned upon when heard, was restored straight away. Who on earth spread this rumour¡­? The only person who I could think of who knew what had happened between Orpheus and I, and who could influence the social scene was Claude. When I asked him about this, he denied it with a smile, but I was almost certain that it was him who had started the rumour. He had helped me out again. He still helped me even though I couldn¡¯t respond to his feelings at that time. I really can¡¯t thank Claude enough. I will never be able to repay this debt. If he asks me for help, then I will do whatever I can to help him. My relationship with Orpheus is¡­ ¡°Diana, why don¡¯t you put it in your room if you like it so much? Then you can touch it whenever you want.¡± ¡°No. It¡¯s sad to break the lilies when they¡¯re blooming so beautifully.¡± ¡°It¡¯ll last for a long time if you put it in a vase and change the water every day.¡± ¡°That¡¯s not the point. You can¡¯t, Vicky. Don¡¯t break the stalk and leave it as it is.¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine to put one in your room. I¡¯m sure Sister thinks the¡­ Oh, I see Brother-in-law.¡± At the same time as when Victoria said this and let go of the lily stalk, a baritone voice called my name. I turned around and saw Orpheus standing a short distance away, watching us silently. ¡°He doesn¡¯t have any presence like always.¡± ¡°I wonder why. I don¡¯t think he¡¯s purposely hiding his presence.¡± Orpheus walked up to us calmly as his wavy black hair blew in the summer breeze. ¡°Orpheus has always been like that. He always surprises people by appearing behind them. He should show his presence a little more.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know how to do that even if you say that,¡± he replied bluntly to Diana. He stood beside me and put his hand around my shoulder to hug me. I was a little embarrassed since Victoria and Diana were here, but he would look at me sadly if I brush his hand away, so I let him hug me. ¡°How¡¯re you feeling?¡± I smiled wryly at Orpheus who asked me the same question several times a day and replied, ¡°I¡¯m fine.¡± Orpheus had become overprotective ever since that day which made his previous cold demeanour seem like an illusion, but lately, his overprotectiveness has increased. He would come check on me whenever he had a moment to spare, and if I tried to walk around the mansion or garden by myself, then he would immediately take me back to my room and tell me off. It felt like I was being watched by two people: him and Claire. I wasn¡¯t allowed to go out unless Orpheus was with me. He told me that he didn¡¯t know what kind of recklessness I might get into if someone wasn¡¯t around. ¡°I don¡¯t feel bad. In fact, I feel better than usual.¡± ¡°Really?¡± Orpheus nodded and stared at my lower abdomen. A loving smile appeared on his nicely shaped lips. He was probably smiling because of the small life that was dwelling in my large, protruding belly. ¨D¨D¨D Orpheus and I are about to have our first child. This was why he was being extra protective lately. ¡°I¡¯m looking forward to your baby being born. The baby should hurry up and be born already,¡± Victoria said, and Diana nodded. ¡°Yeah. I can¡¯t wait to see them. Have you decided on a name?¡± ¡°We¡¯re thinking Klaus for a boy and Gloria for a girl.¡± ¡°Those are lovely names!¡± Victoria clapped and shouted with joy. ¡°I wonder if they¡¯ll have black hair and blue eyes. Either way, they¡¯ll be beautiful.¡± ¡°We won¡¯t know that until the baby is born,¡± Orpheus replied in a softer voice than usual, and Victoria blinked repeatedly since it was rare for him to speak in a soft tone. Diana shook Victoria¡¯s arm and whispered, ¡°Vicky, it¡¯s nearly time.¡± Then, Victoria nodded, ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°Take your time, Sister and Brother-in-law.¡± ¡°You¡¯re going back already? Aren¡¯t we going to walk through the rose maze?¡± ¡°We¡¯ll do that next time. We don¡¯t want to disturb you two.¡± ¡°You don¡¯t have to worry about that.¡± I said that because I thought it would be livelier with more people, but Victoria and Diana laughed. ¡°You¡¯re the same as always, Ophelia.¡± ¡°Should I say it¡¯s just like you to say that, Sister?¡± They laughed for a while, then waved their hands and said, ¡°We¡¯ll see you later,¡± before rushing back to the mansion. I don¡¯t know why they said ¡®just like me¡¯, so I tilted my head in confusion as I watched them walk away. Did I say something weird? ¡°Let¡¯s walk around for a little while.¡± He took his hands off my shoulders and pulled my hand. I replied briefly, ¡°Yes,¡± as I followed after him. ¡°Is there something on your mind? You seem to be thinking about something.¡± ¡°It¡¯s just that¡­ I¡¯m feeling a bit emotional since it¡¯s been a year since everything happened.¡± ¡°I see. It really has.¡± We don¡¯t talk much. We comfortably remain silent most of the time, and only occasionally do we exchange a few words as if remembering the past. Of course, it¡¯s not always like this. We talk a lot when we need to. We simply just don¡¯t need to at the moment. Our hearts can communicate with each other even without words. We feel closer to each other than anyone else. A year has passed since then and our relationship is now peaceful, like our early days of marriage, ¨D¨D¨D the way it should be. Orpheus cares about me in his own way, and I try my best to be a suitable wife for him every day. Even though we were back together, we didn¡¯t misunderstand each other like back then, we aren¡¯t heartbroken from trying to break our relationship and there was no self-sacrifice because of assumptions. We love each other deeply, unlike back then. ¡°Are you happy now?¡± Orpheus said as we approached the rose maze while holding a beautiful blooming rose in his hand. A tremendous feeling of happiness came over me as I gazed at his white fingers carefully removing the sharp thorns one by one, and a smile formed on my lips. ¡°Ophelia?¡± ¡°What about you? Orpheus, no, Lewis, are you happy?¡± Lewis placed the thornless red rose in my hair and dropped a kiss on my forehead. ¡°You¡¯re by my side and our baby will be born soon. I¡¯m so happy that it¡¯s scary.¡± ¡°Then, I¡¯m happy too. Your happiness is my happiness.¡± I have always wanted to make him happy. I was willing to sacrifice everything I had to make him happy. It seemed like such a difficult thing to do, but in reality, it was simple and easy. It made me want to laugh. I broke off a rose like Lewis had, then removed the thorns and excess leaves. ¨D¨D¨D I love you. Instead of saying those words out loud, I kissed the petals with all my love. The red rose that was as red as blood and as red as fire which I couldn¡¯t give to my mother. ¨D¨D¨D I¡¯ll give my love to you forever and ever. I gently inserted the red rose into Orpheus¡¯s breast pocket and looked up at his handsome, white face, and saw an enchanting, sweet smile that was full of tenderness and affection.